Authors’ Note: First of all, if you didn’t catch it in the summary, this fic is co-written with Kay. (Kaybee) It wouldn’t be here without her!  Rory is a sophomore at Yale, meaning that this is 2005.  She lives on campus and comes home on the weekends.  And now, on with the story.

Lorelai burst into the diner, completely out of breath. The several customers stared at her, which wasn't entirely unusual. "Luke!"

He immediately came out of the back with concern as he walked over towards her. "What? What's wrong?" He asked. She was slightly bent over, trying to regain her breath. His first thought was that something had happened to Rory.

Lorelai exhaled and looked up. "I need coffee," she pleaded.

Coffee, of course. He should have known. She nearly scared him half to death, and all she wanted was coffee. "No," he said sternly as he headed back to the storeroom. Rory had already clued him in on Lorelai's little deal- she'd go an entire week without coffee if Rory would go with her to one of Emily's charity things. He didn't know all the details, but he wasn't giving in.

Lorelai trotted along- albeit slowly, since she was still out of breath. "Please, Luke. Please, please, please."

"How many times have I told you not to come back here."

"Rory's in the shower. She'll never know I was here. Please, Luke, just one cup. Just one," Lorelai pleaded.

Luke's expression made it clear that he didn't believe her. "It's never just one."

Lorelai couldn't exactly argue with that, but she'd sure try. "It will be, I swear. I'll- I'll even eat a carrot with it."

"The whole carrot?" Luke paused.

She swallowed. Ugh. "Yes."

He shook his head. "Sorry, no can do."

Lorelai stood there like a kid who had been told they couldn't get a toy at the supermarket. "You're seriously going to go through with this?"
"Yep."

"How about tea? Could you spike some tea with a little coffee?"

"No," Luke replied firmly. This was insane. The woman couldn't last a few hours without her elixir of life.

"Please," she begged. "You don't understand what happens to me when I don't have coffee flowing through my bloodstream. You think I'm crazy with coffee? I can assure you that you don't want to see me without it."

He hesitated. She grinned. Hesitation was always a good sign with Luke when asking for coffee. "Do I sense a yes?"

"Fine," he rolled his eyes. "You can have your damn coffee. But you have to promise me that you won't ask me for it the rest of the day."

Lorelai bit her lip. That was tough. "Ok, I promise. Just make it a big cup."

"The cups are one size fits all." He plunked a mug down on the counter. "Unless you want a bowl. Would you like me to get you a bowl?" He asked sarcastically.

Lorelai glanced at the clock. "The cup's fine," she responded. She really didn't think she had enough time to drink it from a bowl, but otherwise it would have been fine with her.

Luke grudgingly poured the cup of coffee. It was insane, this obsession of his. He couldn't even deny her a cup of coffee. "There." Oh, but the grin he received when he set it down- that was worth it.

"I love you!" Lorelai proclaimed as she inhaled the liquid air.

If only that was meant in a different context. Luke could only assume she would love anyone that gave her caffeine, even Taylor. Or that strange man that sat around playing music on the street corner. Who the hell wanted to stand around on a corner anyway? "Do you really think Rory isn't gonna know you're here?"

She won't find out if you don't tell her." Lorelai looked at him pointedly. "Do we understand each other?"

"I'm not a stool pigeon, I wouldn't go tell her."

"You better not. If I lose this bet, Rory gets to pick the movie for movie nights for the next month.

"Don't you both like the same movies, anyway? Why does who picks it matter?"

"Oh, it matters. It matters a lot. Last movie night, my wonderful daughter chose My Best Friend's Wedding. I mean, come on. I used to like it, but then it just got boring and stupid. Julia Roberts wants to ruin her best friend's wedding, because she realizes she's in love with him? Yeah, right, like that happens in real life. Like anyone would suddenly, on the day of their best friend's wedding, realize they're in love with them." She rolled her eyes.

Yeah. Like that happens. Another reason to add to the list of reasons that Lorelai unknowingly used to convince him he'd never have a shot with her. "You have a point. Doesn't she wind up with the gay guy anyhow?"

Lorelai looked at him in amusement. "You've actually seen My Best Friend's Wedding?"

Luke instantly realized his mistake. "I- well- just the end. You know, Rachel was watching it and I just kind of overheard some stuff."

"As much as I would love to stand here and debate that very fact with you, I have to get going before Rory gets suspicious," Lorelai said as she tilted back her head and swallowed several times as she finished off the coffee.

It wasn't like she wouldn't come back and bug him about it later anyhow. At least he hadn't actually said George was the guy's name. That would have been bad. Very bad. So he saw the movie once, big deal.

Lorelai turned the key in the lock, while keeping a good hold on the mail in her mouth. It was too bad she’d missed him. He was pretty good looking, actually. For a mailman. The door was opened and she called out for Rory. “Marco!”

“Polo!” came the reply.

“Marco!” she tried again.

“Polo!”

Lorelai followed the voice into the kitchen and smiled at her daughter. “Hello, munchkin.”

“Don’t call me that. It doesn’t bring very comforting images to mind.”

“Aw, you don’t like the munchkins from the Wizard of Oz? They’re so cute!”

Rory shuddered. “They creep me out.”

“Aw, you’re just like Luke. They scare him, although he would never admit to it.”

“Huh. Learn something new every day.”

“I would think you would at Yale.”

“It’s an expression, oh uninformed one.”

“It was a joke, oh serious one.” Lorelai pulled out a chair and sat next to Rory, only after taking a sip of her coffee.

“Hey!” she protested, angrily taking her cup back.

“It was just sitting there, begging me to take a sip.  Do you blame it? Look at my lipstick.”

Rory did as she was told and raised an eyebrow in approval. “Nice shade of red.”

“Color me sexy,” responded Lorelai, grinning.

“Don’t think I’ve been called sexy. Ever. And plus, why the hell would you want me to color you? And with what?”

“No, that’s the name of the lipstick.” Lorelai shook her head in amusement. “Although, I think it would be fun to be colored on. But

that’s more of a kinky-“

“Please stop now.”

Lorelai closed her mouth and rested her chin on her palm. “So, any plans today?”

“Not really. Wanna do something?”

“Read my mind.”

“It’s a gift.”

“Do it more often and I’ll just have to give you a crystal ball.”

“What do you want to do? Rent a tasteless movie and make fun of it while consuming large amounts of unhealthy food?”

“Sounds good. Or,” began Lorelai, getting up from the table, “we could make prank calls.”

“That’s pathetic. The last time I did that was when Lane and I had a sleepover before I hit puberty.”

“Prank calling is always fun. You just have to be a good prank caller.”

“And you’re a good prank caller?”

“The best. If there were Prank Call Awards, I would so win.”

“And what would the trophy be? A gold phone?”

“With silver buttons.”

“Nice. Ok, I’ll grab the Yellow Pages.”

“Find a man. They’re more fun,” winked Lorelai.

“If you’re going to say something dirty on the phone, I am so not doing this.”

“Aw, killjoy!”

“I am not a killjoy!”

“Then you’ll do this with me. Trust me, Ror, it’ll be fun. Anyone you want to prank? Ooh.” Lorelai’s eyes twinkled with excitement as she rubbed her hands together. “Let’s prank call Luke,” she whispered.

“Oh, please. He’s not an idiot, he’d know it was us.” Rory took the Yellow Pages from the kitchen counter and sat on the sofa next to Lorelai. “Come on, Mom.”

“No, really, I don’t think he’d know. Please? It’ll be really good, I promise. I have an idea.”

“Fine, but you’re doing it.” She handed Lorelai the phone and folded her legs under her on the couch.

Lorelai dialed Luke's number with that giddy feeling you get when you're about to prank call someone. She rolled her eyes at Rory, who still wasn't sure this was the greatest idea.

"Isn't prank calling illegal?" Rory asked.

Lorelai covered up the mouth piece, waiting while the phone rang. "Rory. Luke is not going to have me arrested."

"Hah! You admit that he'll know it's you," Rory pointed out.

"Luke's," Lorelai heard on the telephone. She waved Rory away, and uncovered the mouthpiece. She lowered her voice and changed her tone. If there was one thing she was good at, it was disguising her voice. "May I speak with Luke Danes?"

Great. Luke groaned. A telemarketer. "You're speaking to him."

"I'm calling from the Home Depot customer service department," Lorelai began in her disguised voice. "There's been a slight delay in your order-"

"I didn't order anything," Luke interrupted.

"I have it right here..." Lorelai paused and held a magazine up to the phone as she ruffled the pages loudly. "Yes, here it is." She rambled off the diner's address and phone number. "Are you sure you didn't place an order?"

"I'm sure."

Lorelai could tell from his tone of voice that he was getting irritated- thus the entire point of prank calling someone. "You signed for an order to be delivered- a load of Grade A lumber. Now, we'll be happy to provide you with a discount on your next purchase for any inconvenience that our supplier's delay in shipment may cause-"

Luke interrupted again. "There's been a mistake. I didn't order any lumber."

"Do you want me to cancel the order?" She asked inquisitively. Man, Luke was just too easy to mess around with.

"Yeah. Cancel it," Luke said as he slid a menu over to a customer that sat down at the counter. He didn't want to be receiving any type of bill for something that he didn't even order. Stupid people. Last time he was there they overcharged him for a ratchet set.

"Okay. I'll just fill out the forms and send them up to management right away. Have a nice day, sir." Lorelai hung up the telephone and smirked to Rory. "See! He had no idea."

"Was he mad?"

"Oh, yeah. He was ticked. I think he really has something against Home Depot. Or at least he does now," Lorelai added happily.

Rory shook her head. "You are so mean. He's your friend." She glanced warily as Lorelai picked up the telephone again. "What are you going to do with that?"

"Rory," Lorelai explained as she hit re-dial, "Everyone knows that to place a true prank call, you have to call back more than once."