~Home for the Holidays~

"Don't make this harder on me than it already is."

Lia said nothing as tears slid down her cheeks.

"Look, it's not like I have a choice. I don't want to go just as much as you don't want me to. But my hands are tied."

"But it's not fair, Matt! I've waited four years to find you and now this!"

Matt hugged her tightly, his own tears dripping onto her.

"Look, I promise I'll write to you every single day."

"Can't you call me, or email me?"

"No phone, no computer…"

"…Not a single luxury! Like Robinson Crusoe, it's as primitive as can be!" T.K chimed, coming down the escalator with a suitcase in his hand. "Come on, Matt! Can't keep Aunt Tallulah waiting!"

"Christmas is going to be so empty without you," Lia murmured, wrapping gloved hands around Matt's waist.

"I know, I know. And I'm sorry. But I promise, one way or another we'll have Christmas together. Even if it has to be in spirit."

The train pulled into the platform with a great lurch, brakes squealing and doors shuddering. T.K. grabbed a couple suitcases and marched briskly onto the train, but Matt lingered for a moment. He quickly and softly kissed Lia, then boarded.

"Merry Christmas, I love you," he mouthed. Lia nodded, the tears flowing harder now. As the train pulled from the platform a sick feeling washed over her. The lyrics to an old Christmas song poured into her head as she watched Matt disappear from sight.

I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams.

"Lia!" came a sudden shout. The teenager spun quickly on her heels as another train was emptied of its passengers. Nicki slung a huge duffel bag over her shoulder and ran towards her.

"Hey, I didn't expect you to be here. I thought Izzy was coming to get me." Then Nicki noticed Lia's reddened eyes and scarlet cheeks. "Lia, what's wrong? Don't tell me, the Grinch stole your last can of Who-Hash and now you'll have to go without, right?"

"No! No Dr. Seuss!" came a plaintive shout from within the duffel bag. Shadowmon popped out, wearing a headband with a piece of mistletoe dangling from a wire fixed to it. "Merry Christmas, kiss the cat!"

"I'm not much into the holiday spirit, Shad," Lia mumbled, wiping her eyes.

"C'mon, Lia. What's bothering you?" Nicki asked.

"Matt and I were supposed to spend Christmas together, it's our first one since we found each other. But he and T.K. have to spend Christmas with their relatives on a farm in the country."

"Wow, that's rough. But Wizardmon's staying with you for Christmas, isn't he?"

"No. He's spending Christmas at the Kamiya's with Kari and Gatomon!"

"Sweet love of Giovanni, you have to have the worst Christmas in the history of mankind."

"I don't know how it can get any worse."

"NICKI!"

Nicki turned quickly, watching as someone weaved through the crowd of shoppers and families going home for Christmas. His cheeks were rosy from the cold, and his lips were a pale shade of blue, but he seemed in high spirits as he dodged shopping bag after shopping bag.

"IZZY!"

Nicki hurried over to greet him, dropped her bag on the pavement, which gave Shadowmon quite a jolt, and leapt into his arms.

"I missed you so much, Nicki!"

"Oh Izzy!"

Lia watched quietly, wishing with all her heart her holiday could be more like that. But she knew that her ideal Christmas was now only a figment of her imagination.

"Merry Christmas, Lia!" Izzy called merrily, walking over to help Nicki with her bags.

"Merry Christmas, Izzy."

"Don't mind her, she's just suffering from pre-holiday depression," Shad hissed in a loud whisper. "Yama-chan bailed on her. He's spending time on Old MacDonald's farm and he'll come back in overalls pulling a complete Cotton Eye Joe."

"Shad! Be nice!" Nicki reprimanded, clouting her digimon lightly.

"C'mon, we don't want to be late for the party," Izzy stated.

"What party?" the girls asked in unison.

"You didn't hear? Mimi rented the school gym out for us, to use for our Christmas party. We're smuggling the digimon through the digiport, Willis and the twins are flying in from Colorado, and Ken and Wormmon are probably on their way now."

(A/N: Ken is now an official "good guy.")

"I'm not really in the mood for a party right now," Lia murmured.

"Oh, don't be like that. So Matt is spending Christmas milking cows and turning into a corn fritter. No big deal, you just make do," Nicki pointed out.

"Yeah! Now kiss the cat!" Shadowmon added.

Easy for you to say, your boyfriends are going to be with you this Christmas. Oh Matt, why do these things always happen to me?

"This party is going to be my best one yet!" Mimi cheered as she instructed Tai and Davis, who were standing on ladders trying to hang a garland at the last minute. "No, no, a little to the left. Higher, higher…perfect!"

"Does it seem like we're missing people?" Joe asked, filling the punch bowl.

"Yeah, but I bet they'll be here soon," Sora replied, fixing a sprig of mistletoe onto the basketball hoop.

"I'll bet you five bucks I can get Wizardmon under that," Gatomon hissed to Kari, giggling.

"You're on."

"Hi! Merry Christmas, sorry we're late!" came a cheerful shout as Willis, Terriermon, and Lopmon stepped in from the cold.

"That in-flight movie was awful, and they ran out of peanuts!" Terriermon pouted.

"And now it's cold! I bet it snows, and I don't like snow," Lopmon added.

"Silly, you've never seen snow," Willis laughed.

"The party hasn't started yet, has it?" Ken asked, following Willis in.

"You're right on time," Cody answered. Veemon, Hawkmon, and Armadillomon, who had digivolved for the occasion, peered over Yolei's shoulders as she began transporting the other digimon to the gym through Izzy's laptop.

"Mimi!"

"Oh Palmon, I missed you! Merry Christmas!"

"Merry what?" Gomamon asked.

"Is this anything like Thanksgiving? Cuz if it is I'm protesting," Biyomon said.

"No, much better," Yolei said, finishing her work.

"Hey Tai, is it just me or are we a few Digidestined short?" Agumon asked.

"Yeah, where's Matt?" Gabumon added.

"With his luck he's been wrapped up in a box and stuck under somebody's Christmas tree," Davis said sarcastically.

"Ooh, I'd be afraid of getting claustrophobic," Wormmon pointed out.

"Hiyaz, we're here!" Nicki called as the stragglers trudged in. Shadowmon immediately jumped out of the duffel bag and ran over to Gomamon.

"I've got mistletoe, so kiss me!"

"Mistletoe? Ew, that sounds like a disease!"

"Where are T.K. and Patamon?" Kari asked.

"And Matt!" Gabumon added.

"They're not coming," Lia said despondently.

"They've been shipped off to their relatives' for the vay-cay," Nicki stated.

"Good work in getting everyone here, Yolei. It's good to know my laptop is in capable hands," Izzy said.

"Gee, thanks. That means a lot coming from you."

The party went off, as Mimi was delighted to see, without a problem. There was only one minor setback, however.

"Lia, are you going to mope like this the entire time?" Wizardmon inquired.

"Yes, I am. I have no reason to be happy."

"Give me a break! You're the last person I should see feeling sorry for yourself on Christmas! Look, I may be a wizard digimon, but I can't magically wave my arms and make Matt waltz through the doors, it just doesn't work that way. If you want, I'll cancel my plans and stay home with you, but I can't stand to see you having a pity party right before Christmas!"

"Don't cancel your plans, Wizardmon. It's not your fault this happened. It's just something I have to accept, and I will try to act a little more maturely about it. I'm sorry."

But Mimi was quite wrong in thinking her party was without problems. Half an hour after the party had gotten underway, the thirteen kids and fifteen digimon were surprised to see the doors open slowly. Someone walked in, a bright pink scarf wound around her neck. She shivered, rubbed her arms, and looked around. Davis stifled a groan.

"Oh, what's my sister doing here?"

"I'll get rid of her," Tai sighed.

"No, I'll do it," Lia offered. "I think I know what she's up to."

"Jun, this is a private party. What are you doing here?" she asked icily.

"Where's Matt?" Jun asked, her voice echoing off the walls.

"He's not here."

"Oh yeah, sure. Pull him out of whatever closet he's hiding in and tell him to come here. I wanted to talk to him about our Christmas plans."

"Jun, he's not here."

"Like I'm going to believe you. What are you, his babysitter?"

Lia narrowed her amber-brown eyes as they danced with fire, burned with hatred for this girl.

"Matt is on an Amtrak bound for the country, where he'll be spending Christmas with some country hick cousin, getting up at the crack of dawn to slop pigs and you have the audacity to come in here, uninvited and unwelcome, demanding to see him, when he's not here nor will he be here, and you have no idea who I am or why I should even be bothering to speak to you. Let me tell you this, Jun Motomiya, there is only one girl on the face of this earth that Matt will ever love and that is me and if you try and tell me otherwise I will cut your tongue out and feed it to you. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!" she said in an even tone, her temper flaring until her blood boiled within her veins and she bolted from the gym, sobbing as if the world had come crashing down around her. And all anyone could do was stare in open-mouthed shock at the doors, which were now swinging on their hinges.

Matt stared out the window as the world passed by in a colorless blur. The sky was a leaden color, the trees were stark, and the ground was barren. Everything seemed lifeless, and the depressing scene outside only made the pain in his heart greater.

I've broken another promise to her. I keep hurting her. Why, why do I have to keep making her cry?

"Old MacDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-ow! What'd you hit me for?" T.K. asked, rubbing his arm. Matt muttered something that sounded like "baka" and turned back to the window.

"Hey, I'm sorry if you had to blow off your girlfriend again but don't take it out on me!"

Matt remained silent, watching the world flutter by in its dowdy desolation.

"What do you think Becky looks like now?"

"Becky who?" he finally murmured. T.K. pulled a picture from his pocket and held it up. There was Matt, at least four or five years of age, and standing next to him was a pudgy girl of close to the same age. Her straw-colored hair was plaited into pigtails, and a wreath of daisies rested on her temples. Freckles sprinkled across her upturned nose, and her eyes were a shade of ice blue.

"Where are you in that picture?" Patamon asked, leaning over the baggage hold.

"I was too little to sit still. We were taking this next to the horse pen, and I tried to climb under the fence. Mom had to hold me while Dad took the picture," T.K. explained, grinning. Matt nodded curtly.

"Argh, you're driving me crazy! You haven't said more than five words this entire time! Patamon, can't you give him some sort of lecture?"

"Who do I look like, Gabumon?"

The train came to a screeching halt, lurching the three of them forward violently. Patamon tumbled from the baggage hold into the aisle, and quickly darted to where he would not be noticed.

"Looks like we're here," Matt mumbled, picking up his bags. T.K. nodded and collected his own things. In silence they left the train and waited on the platform. They didn't have to wait very long.

"Matty! Cousin Matty!" came a lilting call.

A teenage girl slightly older than Matt ran across the platform, grinning wildly. Her long golden hair streamed out behind her, her ice blue eyes sparkled. She was dressed in a red gingham dress with a skirt that barely reached mid thigh and a denim jacket. She threw her arms around Matt, then pulled back as his muscles tensed.

"Why, you're as riled up as a polecat in a roomful of rocking chairs. What's troubling you, Cousin? I don't bite…" she leaned over to his ear. "…hard."

"It's nothing, Becky. You remember T.K., right?" he murmured, stepping aside.

"Last time I saw you, you were teeny-tiny. Now look at ya! Golly, Mama's gonna be surprised!"

They walked back to the farm, which was quite a long way from the farm, but Becky had explained that the weather was too unpredictable to take the truck in.

"The engine's stalled three times this week, and with the snow coming I'd be afraid to get stranded."

"Don't worry about it, Matt and I have had to walk much farther than this," T.K. said.

"Gee Matty, you haven't said much since ya got here. What's got your knickers in a twist?"

"Nothing, it's nothing."

"I think yer fibbing."

You can think all you want but I'm not saying anything. I'd sooner go mute than tell anyone how much I hurt.

"Don't worry, Matty. Whatever it is that's ailing ya, a good day's worth of work with Pa will set ya straight."

I can hardly wait.

Wizardmon searched the city frantically, fearing that Lia had done something foolish in her upset fit. She was nowhere to be seen, and the sky became heavy with snow-laden clouds that scraped against the tallest buildings as they sank lower into the sky, a dull gray. Finally, after another ten minutes of hopeless wandering he found her, sitting on her doorstep and weeping furiously.

"Lia?"

"Go away!"

"Lia, I'm sorry. I know how much you want to be with him."

Lia moved her hands down her cheeks and peered at him over her fingertips.

"I came, not only to find you, but to give you a little advice. Go to him, Lia."

"What?"

"I'm serious. Pack your bags and I'll help you get there. Matt needs you, and I'm not one to ruin holidays."

Lia looked up at him, eyes wide. "You'll do that?"

"Well duh, I'm your digimon guardian, it kinda works that way."

"Wizardmon, you're the best!" she wrapped her arms around him, then scampered inside to pack.

"Now, if only I could tell that to Gatomon," he muttered.

Matt was thoroughly exhausted. His uncle had made him work all afternoon and into the evening. His shoulders and back ached, the flesh on his hands rubbed raw, his feet blistered. Carelessly tossing his shirt over the back of a chair, he pulled the covers back on the bed. The sheets were cold flannel, the pillow hard, and the mattress lumpy. There was a frigid draft seeping in under the windowpane, and the entire room was pure darkness. Time moved in slow motion, and sleep evaded Matt. When it did claim him, it was in momentary fragments and horrible nightmares. He tossed and turned, shivering and sweating and crying out. But the worst of the nightmares was yet to come.

(A/N: The italicized stuff that follows is part of a dream sequence. Kay?)

"You have to promise you won't leave me."

"I promise you, Lia. I'll never let you go."

Matt could see himself cradling Lia in his arms, the two of them children, innocent and unaware of the violence to come. The scene shifted to more present times.

"Promise me you won't leave again."

"I swear it."

The vision blurred, throwing Matt into a violent whirlpool of darkness.

"You're lying," Jun's voice echoed in the blackness.

"In case you haven't noticed, I've grown up a lot," T.K.'s young voice added.

"You lied to me," came Lia's sob.

"I can always tell when people are lying to me."

"Stop treating me like a little kid!"

"How could you break your promise to me? How could you?"

"Matt! Matt, you have to wake up!" T.K. shouted, shaking him.

"He can't hear you, T.K.!" Patamon cried.

T.K. looked down at his hands, trembling like a leaf in the wind. "Forgive me."

Lia reached out her hand and struck Matt's cheek.

"NO!" Matt cried, sitting bolt upright and clutching his cheek.

"Matt, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hit you but you were screaming in your sleep and…"

Matt stared at T.K., perspiration drenching his forehead and chest, soaking the sheets. His whole body trembled as he gasped for breath. His cheek had dulled to a glowing crimson, but the pain ran deeper, to his soul. His perfect azure eyes brimmed with crystalline tears and he began to sob.

T.K. watched helplessly as his brother was reduced to tears in instants. He had no idea what to say or do. He had never seen Matt, his older brother, the strong one, cry before and it scared him. Patamon looked up at him with questioning eyes and nodded ever so slightly. T.K. instantly understood and put his arms around his brother.

"I can't face her, not after this. I've broken my promise to her so many times. She keeps asking me to stay with her, and I keep giving her my word and then turn right around and deceive her."

"If Lia truly loves you, she'll find it in her heart to forgive you. And I know that she'll forgive you, Yamato, my brother, because she and I have more in common than you think."

"How so?" Matt murmured.

"The two of us have a love for you that knows no boundaries." T.K. kissed his cheek and hopped off the bed. "I'll see ya in the morning. Night, Matt."

The next day, Christmas Eve, went by in a blur. Becky was hard at work in the kitchen with her mother preparing tomorrow's dinner while Matt and T.K. went off with their uncle.

"All righty. T.K., you'll do the barnyard chores…and this time, don't hassle Bessie."

T.K. grinned sheepishly, picked up a couple buckets, and headed into the barn.

"As fer you, Matt, I need a pair of strong hands to help me cut us down a Christmas tree…we don't do plastic trees like you city folk."

Matt smiled as well, remembering Lia's "I have a plastic Christmas tree" speech that happened only a week ago.

The two of them walked off the fields, the ground hard with frost, into the woods behind the barn. It was silent, as though nature itself had fled south to warmer parts. After an hour of tramping over dry leaves and mumbling through chattering teeth, they came upon the perfect tree, cut it down, and dragged it back to the house.

If Palmon were here, she'd protest. "Christmas is the genocide of trees!"

After his discussion with T.K. the night before, Matt's attitude had greatly improved. Becky had even coaxed him into singing, despite the scarlet blush he maintained throughout the entire thing.

"Well, Matty, it seems being out here in the country has made y'all right. Yer daddy should send ya out here more often!"

Dragging the tree home seemed an impossible task, but standing it up in the living room was even harder. Matt eventually had to suggest that they set the tree up outside, since it was now leaning precariously against the ceiling.

"Jeez, Matt, that tree is huge! I think it makes even Venommyotismon seem short!" T.K. said as he and Patamon came out of the barn.

"Yeah, and now I have to try and decorate the whole thing."

"We'll help, right Patamon?"

"Yup!"

"Good. Digi-armor energize!"

Matt thought using Pegasusmon to help him string the lights was kind of cheating, but it certainly beat trying to stand steady on a fifty-foot ladder. Within a short amount of time he and T.K. were plugging the lights into the one power source of the house and standing back. It was just getting dark by then. Supper went casually, and soon the two boys were blinking back exhaustion.

"Why don't y'all tuck in fer the night? Tomorrow's Christmas, and you'll probably want to be up bright and early, don't ya?" their aunt suggested. Matt and T.K. nodded gratefully and trudged up the stairs.

"I smuggled some of Aunt Tallulah's gingerbread cookies up with Patamon," T.K. snickered as he and Matt stood in the hallway.

"I doubt I'll be able to sleep if I eat one of those. All that sugar, I'd be bouncing off the walls worse than Chibimon," Matt replied.

"Yeah, I'll bet Patamon ate all of them already anyways. Night, Matt."

"Night, T.K."

As Matt started unbuttoning his shirt he heard something coming from outside.

"I'll be home for Christmas, you can count on me."

Matt grinned and hastily began rebuttoning his shirt. He recognized that lilting soprano voice anywhere. He grabbed his coat, gloves, scarf and shoes and ran into the fields. The crisp night air stung his face as he sprinted away from the farm. There was little light, except from the Christmas tree and a lone candle held by gloved fingers.

"We'll have snow, and mistletoe, and presents by the tree. Christmas Eve will find me, where the love light gleams. I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams."

Just then the sky opened up and snow pelted the ground, the tiny white flakes clinging instantly to everything they touched. The candle flickered, but remained lit. Matt gasped, his breath visible in the frigid air. There, standing in the cold and dark, like a holy angel, was Lia.

"Merry Christmas, Yamato," she murmured. She blew out the candle, dropped it on the ground and leapt into his arms.

"Lia, how?"

"Wizardmon did all this for me. And Shadowmon let me borrow this." Lia pulled something from her coat pocket and held it high over her head. The sprig of mistletoe from her headband. Matt grinned wildly and kissed her, his passion burning brighter than the lights on the tree.

Snow clung to their hair and bodies, but they didn't notice. Matt held Lia closer, swearing to himself that this time he wouldn't let her go. He kissed her lips again, a rush of warmth flowing into his veins.

"I love you with all my heart," Lia murmured.

"And I you. Merry Christmas, my Lia."

Christmas Eve will find me, where the love light gleams. I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams.

Merriest of holiday wishes from our family to yours.

The Digidestined and digimon.