Title: Harry and the Brilliant Plan

Author: Beth Ann

Rating: PG13

Disclaimer: Harry Potter and his wizarding world belongs to JK Rowling.  I am just borrowing the characters and will release them unharmed at the end of this story.  I am not making any money from this story.

Acknowledgements: Thanks go, as ever, to Mad Martha for reading this through. 

Author’s note: This story is completely unrelated to Look to the Future.  It’s just a little snippet that came to me one day when I was supposed to be working on one of my other fics – I hope you enjoy it!  Comments are always welcome.

Harry crashed into his dormitory as if Voldemort himself was chasing him.  He slammed the door behind him and sagged against it, panting with exertion and some relief.

“Bloody Hell, Harry, what’s up with you?  And – why are you only wearing a towel?” asked Ron suspiciously. 

Ron had been pawing through a pile of clothes in an attempt to find a clean shirt, but Harry’s precipitous entrance had distracted him from his quest.

Harry looked over at his friend with a distinctly guilty expression on his face.  “Oh, er, Ron.  I didn’t see you were there.”

The young man straightened up and strolled over to his four-poster bed in what he no-doubt assumed was a nonchalant manner, but which actually screamed embarrassment.  He sat down on the edge of the bed, pulled out his timetable and pretended to study it.  This made Ron even more suspicious; there were only a few more weeks left of their seventh year, and Harry undoubtedly knew his timetable by heart by now.

“Oh no, don’t tell me – Ginny,” said Ron darkly.

Harry looked up, a miserable expression on his face.  “How did you know?”

“It seemed a good bet based on recent events.  What’s she done now, then?”

“She somehow sneaked into the bathroom while I was in the shower stall.  Gave me the shock of my life when I came out to find her.”  Harry’s face was red with remembered embarrassment.  “I could have been naked, for god’s sake!”

Ron choked in horror.  He couldn’t believe what his little sister had done now.  “So what did you do?”

“She was gabbling something about soulmates, but I didn’t hear much as I – er, I ran.”

All the way through the corridors dressed in only a towel.  Thank you, Ginny.  At least there hadn’t been that many people around, but Dean had practically killed himself laughing as he watched Harry streak past him – in more than one meaning of the word.

“Safest thing to do, mate.  This is getting serious.  I don’t know what’s up with the little brat.  Maybe I should talk to Mum again.”

“She’ll just say that it’s only a crush, and we’re not to embarrass her,” Harry said gloomily.  “I think she’d quite like me to marry Ginny anyway.”

Ron’s silence in response to this comment was tacit agreement that his mother, who already thought of Harry as part of the family, was not averse to Ginny’s plotting to make him one officially.

The whole thing had started a month or two ago, when Ginny had seemed to suddenly realise that Harry would be graduating soon.  She had always had a crush on Harry, but until then had seemed content to admire him from afar.  Now something had pushed her into taking action.  Harry blamed the article in Wizarding Hunks, personally.  Hermione had disapprovingly reported that she had seen Ginny studying ’10 ways to get your wizard – and keep him!’ with much more concentration that she had ever given to her homework.

So far Harry had suffered through numerous attempts by Ginny to corner him for a quiet ‘chat’ – he had only fallen for that the first time.  He had received red roses and little love notes.  Ginny had baked his favourite chocolate cake and decorated it with chocolate hearts.  Actually, the cake had been surprisingly edible, but still not worth the embarrassing teasing of his year mates.  The situation was becoming the talk of Gryffindor; the only slightly good thing about it was that so far, he didn’t think many people outside his house knew what was happening.

Now it seemed that Ginny had decided on even more direct action.  Harry sat on the bed in his towel, head in his hands.  He wondered mournfully whether he should have let Voldemort kill him after all.

“I think we ought to hold a council of war,” Ron finally broke the thick silence to say.  “You, me, Hermione, in the usual place after class.”

“I don’t know what we can do,” Harry said defeatedly.  “I mean, you’ve both talked to her.  I’ve told her I don’t feel that way.  Hell, I’ve even put it in writing!  And your Mum doesn’t seem to take it seriously.”

“Is this the guy who actually defeated Voldemort?  Where’s your courage gone?”

“Voldemort didn’t want to talk about our ‘feelings’,” Harry shuddered.

“Come on, I’m sure Hermione can think of something,” Ron tried to spur him on.  “Now get cracking, or you’ll be late for Charms.”

“I suppose it’s worth a try,” Harry said, getting up with a sigh and reaching for his spare uniform.  He’d left the clothes he’d been meaning to wear today in the bathroom, and made a mental note to remember to collect them later when the coast was clear. “Things can’t get any worse, anyway.”

*****

Hermione was shocked when Harry and Ron told her of Ginny’s latest escapade.

“I can’t believe she’d go so far!  Actually going into the boys’ bathroom.  This counts as sexual harassment, Harry.  I think we should tell the Headmaster or Professor McGonagall.”

“Definitely not!” Harry said emphatically.  “I’d feel too stupid.  ‘Please, sir, can you stop Ginny from chasing after me?’ I’d be even more of a laughing stock than I am now.”

Ron sighed in relief.  Ginny was being a silly little prat, but she was his sister and he didn’t want to get her into trouble.

“Especially if she brought up the fact that we made quite a habit of going into the girls’ toilets in second year,” he added.

“That was quite a different matter,” Hermione said, but to the boys’ relief she dropped the idea anyway.

The trio sat in silence for a while, thinking furiously.  Hermione frowned in concentration, tapping her quill against her lips.  Nobody could come up with a plan.

Suddenly Harry snapped.  “I don’t even know why she’s doing this anyway!” he wailed.  It’s not as if I’m the world’s most handsome bloke.  Are you sure someone hasn’t slipped her a love potion?”

“Of course not, Harry, that was one of the first things I checked,” Hermione said.

“I don’t know why she’s chasing after you either,” Ron agreed tactlessly.  “I mean, I suppose you’re okay looking, but you’re not very tall, and –“

“Ron!” snapped Hermione sternly.  “It’s obvious why Ginny fancies Harry like mad – half the school does, they just don’t go around making fools of themselves like your sister.”

Ron gaped at his girlfriend in astonishment, while Harry blushed madly.  Had he said that things couldn’t get any worse?

“There’s the fact that he’s a famous hero, the powerful young wizard who defeated Voldemort, of course.  But mainly it’s to do with his looks.”  She eyed Harry dispassionately, weighing him up as if he was a lamb chop in the butcher’s.  “He might not be hugely tall, but he’s slim and nicely proportioned, and fit from all that Quidditch.” 

Harry was sliding down in his seat, wishing with all his might that the floor would open up beneath him.  Hermione carried on regardless. 

“He’s got flyaway hair that makes people want to smooth it down, and an endearing blush and a shy smile that makes people want to mother him.  Combine that with intense green come-to-bed eyes - and no spots - and Harry has got it made.”

“Steady on, Hermione, or I’ll think you’re after him, too,” Ron said in amazement, eyeing his friend.  He just couldn’t see it, himself.

“Don’t worry, in my case it’s purely aesthetic appreciation,” Hermione smiled at her boyfriend. “You’re more than man enough for me.”

Harry shot straight up again with a protest when the pair began to make eyes at each other across the library table.  “Hey!  We’re not here for you to get lovey-dovey with each other, we’re here to solve my problem.  Specifically, what to do about Ginny.”

“Oh, I don’t know, Harry.  How about just saying that you’re in a passionate relationship with someone else?”

“No good,” Harry said.  “I tried that and she didn’t believe me.”

“You could always say that there was a reason why you were keeping it hidden,” Ron began, only to be interrupted by Hermione’s excited squeal.

“I know!  It’s perfect.  Harry, you just need to tell her you’re gay!”

Harry, who had returned to his normal colour, went bright red again, staring at Hermione open-mouthed and speechless.

Ron wasn’t so restrained.  “Hermione!” he burst out in horror.  “He can’t say that.”

“Oh, and why not, Ron Weasley?  Are you suggesting that there’s something wrong with Harry being gay?”

Ron, no matter how worked up, recognised the danger in Hermione’s clipped tones and stepped a bit more cautiously.  “Well, no.  I suppose there’s nothing actually wrong with it.”  He floundered slightly then remembered his original point with triumph.  “But Harry isn’t gay!”

“Ron,” said Hermione in her patented patiently-explaining-to-the-idiots tone of voice.  “Harry’s only going to pretend to be gay.  To get rid of Ginny.  Your sister, remember?”

“Oh, don’t talk such nonsense, Hermione,”  Ron said crossly.  “Of course I remember Ginny.  I just think there must be a better plan.”

“Well, you can come up with one then, Mr. Clever, if you don’t like mine.  We’ve been here for ages and this is the only idea we’ve got.”

The situation looked like it was heating up into a real humdinger of an argument between the two hotheads, when Harry finally decided to make himself heard.

“Hey,” he said.  “Doesn’t anyone care what I think?”

Recalled to themselves, Hermione and Ron looked a bit sheepish. 

“So, what do you think Harry?” asked Ron, trying hard to keep his voice even and un-challenging.

“I think Hermione’s right.  It’s the only thing we’ve come up with so far, and I really want Ginny off my back.  I’ll do it.  But this is to go no further, right?”

Harry looked sternly at each of his friends, accepting their solemn nods.  Thank God both of them could be trusted; imagine if they’d been Slytherins like Crabbe or Goyle, ready to seize any moment of weakness and use it to their advantage.  He shuddered at the thought.

“Okay, mate,” said Ron, subdued.  He was slightly miffed that Harry hadn’t backed him up, after all, he’d been defending his honour.  But he supposed he couldn’t take it too far, as it was his sister causing all the trouble in the first place.  At least Hermione was never one to gloat.  He looked across at her; she was clearly thinking out further details in her plan, argument forgotten.

“I think you should tell her tonight,” Hermione mused, jotting notes on her scroll.  “Tell her you’ve got something important to say, and she’s not to tell anyone else.  You could –“

“Thanks.  I can take it from here,” Harry interrupted, knowing that Hermione was likely to carry on enthusiastically all day otherwise.  I’ll get it over with as soon as possible.  Then maybe my life can get back to normal.”

Ron felt an odd premonition – very odd for someone who hated Divination – and wondered when Harry’s life had ever been normal.  He kept silent and the moment passed, but he wondered if things would be quite as simple as Harry had made them out to be.

******

For the first time in weeks Harry didn’t try to avoid Ginny as she made a beeline for him that evening in the common room.  Hermione nudged Harry sharply and made as if to whisper further instructions in his ear, but Ron dragged her off with only a shake of his head at his sister, who, focused on Harry, ignored him.

“I can’t bear this,” Ron muttered as he left rapidly.  “Fred and George may have been in and out of trouble, but at least they didn’t make fools of themselves.  If Mum only knew….”

Harry was too busy eyeing Ginny warily to pay much attention to Ron’s parting comments.  Her robe was hanging open as if casually, displaying a rather vampish school uniform underneath.  Ginny’s pleated skirt had shrunk miraculously to barely cover the tops of her thighs, and her tight white shirt was unbuttoned to halfway down her chest, displaying ample quantities of creamy skin and freckles.

Ginny swayed closer to Harry, her high heels actually making her an inch or two taller than the short boy.

“Hello, Harry,” she purred, batting her mascara-ed eyelashes at him furiously in a way which made him bite his cheek to stifle his sudden laughter.  She leaned closer and the overpowering musky smell of her perfume made his eyes begin to water.

“Ginny,” acknowledged Harry in a strangled tone, edging away.  Ginny, too used to Harry fleeing at this point, was obviously determined to avoid it happening again, and clasped his arm tightly with her red-nailed hand.

“I missed you this morning,” she pouted.  “You left so quickly, we didn’t have time to … chat.”

Harry felt his resolve to rid himself of Ginny’s unwanted attentions harden as he furiously fought back a blush at the thought of this morning.  He wished that one day he would stop blushing so often; it hardly seemed a manly trait to him, even if some people said it was endearing.

“I had to go, Ginny,” he gritted, unable to let it pass though this wasn’t part of the plan.  “You shouldn’t have been there.  If your Mum –“

“Pooh!” said Ginny airily.  “Mum believes in seizing opportunities with both hands, just like I do.”  Her voice lowered.  “And you’re one opportunity I’d like to seize.”

“Ginny!” yelped Harry, as in a lightning move she squeezed his behind.  He jerked away indignantly, ignoring her laugh.

“As it is, I would like a chat with you, but not here.” 

Harry looked around the common room to see if others were looking at them.  As he had dreaded, Dean and Seamus were grinning and gesturing at him madly, while numerous other people were eyeing them less openly.  His heart sank.  The gossip would spread like wildfire tomorrow.  He just hoped the Slytherins didn’t get hold of it; Draco Malfoy would make his life hell if he heard about this.

“We could go to the astronomy tower,” Ginny suggested flirtatiously.

“Let’s go for a walk outside, shall we?” Harry offered instead, heading for the door with more speed than chivalry as Ginny tottered somewhat precariously after him.

*****

They strolled along the gardens for a while, until Harry was certain they hadn’t been followed and were out of the range of any eavesdroppers.  Ginny had been amazingly silent behind him, and Harry wished she had remained her old, tomboyish self, instead of becoming this ridiculous caricature of what she no doubt thought a seductive woman was.  He felt sorry for her, but no longer had any patience with her antics.

Harry stopped and faced her, grasping her arms to emphasise his seriousness.

“Now look, Ginny.  This has gone on long enough.  I’ve told you before that I don’t feel that way about you.  I’m sorry, but that’s just they way it is.”

Ginny was silent; he could feel the tension in her body, but couldn’t read her shadowed expression.  Harry carried on bravely.

“The thing is…the thing is, I’m actually gay.”

There!  The words were out.  Harry felt a great weight lift from his shoulders.  Until Ginny’s reaction, that was.  She laughed.

“Harry, you can’t be gay!  I remember you lusting after Cho only a couple of years ago.”

“That was three years ago, and only a crush, like the one you’ve got on me,” Harry snapped.  “As it happens, I am gay.”

“Really?” Ginny said, her tone expressing complete disbelief.  “I don’t think so.  Prove it.”

“Prove it?  What do you mean, prove it?”

”I mean, that I think you’re only saying this to put me off.  Oh Harry, I know I’m young, but can’t you see we were fated to be together?”  Ginny wailed.  She moved closer as if to kiss him, but Harry fended her off.

“We’re not meant to be together, Ginny.  I. Am. Gay.”

Ginny’s raised eyebrow said that as usual Harry wasn’t getting though to her, and he rushed onwards.  “And I’m seeing Draco Malfoy!”

Ginny fell back astonished, before shaking her head in bewilderment.

“Why are you lying to me, Harry? Please, just give me a chance, we could be so happy-“

Her words receded as Harry bolted for the second time that day.

******

”It didn’t work,” Harry said gloomily as he entered the small room which was he and his friends’ normal meeting place.

Ron and Hermione sprang apart, flushed and breathless, but Harry was too depressed to take any notice of that.

“Really? What went wrong?” queried Hermione, as she tried to pat her bushy hair into some sort of order.

“Everything.  I said I was gay, and she laughed.”

“She laughed?”  Hermione frowned.  “That’s not very supportive.  I must have a word with Ginny.”

”Hermione, that’s hardly the issue here,” said Ron.  “It means that Harry is still stuck with my fool of a sister.”

“And that’s not all,” said Harry in a small voice.  “I sort of said I was seeing someone.”  He laughed nervously.  “Er, Draco Malfoy.”

”Malfoy!” said Ron.  “Why on earth did you say you were seeing that bastard?”

For a change, this time Harry paled instead of blushing.  “Well, his was the first name that I thought of.  You’re seeing Hermione, Dean and Seamus are with Parvati and Lavender…”

“Bloody hell, couldn’t you have picked Neville?”  asked Ron.  “Malfoy, for God’s sake.”

“Ron, that’s hardly the issue here,” repeated Hermione pointedly.  “If Ginny still acts badly tomorrow, I think we have to try your Mum again, or McGonagall or someone.  This can’t go on.”

Ron and Harry reluctantly agreed after much discussion, as no one could think of anything else to do.  After a while, Harry slipped away, leaving the other two to their own devices.  Ron’s last cry of “Malfoy?” echoed in his ears as he left.

*****

Harry approached the next day warily.  There was the potential for much embarrassment to be had, after all.  No doubt the gossip about him and Ginny would finally spread to the other houses.  Ginny would somehow step up her ‘Mission: Catch Harry’ campaign, which would lead to humiliation on two fronts, both from her behaviour and when he had to actually tell one of the Professors what was going on to try to stop her.  And what if she told anyone that he’d said he was seeing Draco Malfoy?  All in all, today was one of those days Harry just wished he could spend curled up in bed with the covers pulled up over his head.

To his surprise, however, things seemed to go quite well until dinner time.  Then his luck ran out.  It was obvious from the less-than-surreptitious looks and laughter that people were once more enjoying themselves gossiping about the famous Harry Potter.

Harry sneaked a peak over at the Slytherin table, hoping against hope that somehow at least they would be unaware of what was going on.  The hope was futile, of course, which was confirmed when he saw Crabbe and Goyle chortling together, and Malfoy glaring.  What had he heard?

As soon as dinner had ended, Draco sprang lithely out of his seat and headed over to the Gryffindor table.  The laughter died as he padded smoothly closer, until he came to a halt at Harry’s end of the table.  Everyone sat in hushed expectancy, waiting to see what he would do.  Harry whimpered and sank low in his seat, but Draco’s eyes were fixed on Ginny.

“Weasley.”  The light tenor voice was quiet, but had no difficulty in grabbing attention.  “It’s come to my notice that you’ve been chasing after Potter.  Is this true?”

“Oh, hell,” thought Harry, wondering if he would get away with crawling off under the table.

The Gryffindors were staring at each other, wondering what Malfoy was up to.  Ron leapt in; “She doesn’t have to say anything to you, Malfoy!”

“I was talking to your sister, Weasley,” sneered Draco, even as Ginny piped up bravely.

“I’m not ashamed of anything I’ve done!  Yes, I do want Harry to notice me.  We were meant to be together.”

“Funny,” said Draco.  “Since Harry is gay and actually going out with me.  Now keep your hands off my boyfriend.”

To emphasise the point, his surprisingly strong hands dragged a shrinking Harry up and away from the table, to kiss him passionately.  After a second, Harry joined in enthusiastically, shock at Draco outing them so publicly vanishing from his mind. 

When Draco finally released his mouth, Harry came back to himself to find that the whole Hall was watching in deathly silence.

“Oops,” said Harry with an embarrassed grin.  He turned to a for-once-silent Hermione and Ron.  “Surprise.” 

Ginny was staring at them, tears beginning to form in her heavily made-up eyes as she began to realise that Harry had been serious the night before.  He shrugged at her.  “Well, you did want me to prove it.”

Draco was still holding Harry close, a smug smirk on his face as he watched the effects of his behaviour.

“I thought we agreed not to tell anyone,” Harry scolded him, his happy smile taking any sting out of the words.

“When I hear that someone else is making eyes at my Baby,” he sent an icy glare towards Ginny, not caring that it was now obvious that she had lost the war for Harry’s affections, “I act.”

Harry hoped to hell that the possessive Draco never heard how Ginny had actually squeezed his arse.  He wanted Ron to be best man at his wedding, after all, which would hardly happen if Ginny had been turned into a warthog or something worse by his groom.

He could see the shock was beginning to wear off among several people, and decided that in this instance he would rather live to fight another day.

“Come on, Loverboy,” he said to Draco, his sexy tone causing the grey eyes to heat up in response.  “Let’s go act together – in private.”

The pair hurried out of the hall, arms entwined, and neither spared a thought for the ruckus that erupted behind them.  They were finally free to express their love and passion openly, and they were going to take every advantage of the opportunity, starting from now.