I don't own them (mores the pity!); they're Marvel's and Ah'm usin'em
without permission:):) Ah ain't makin' a plug nickel! If ya'll sue me
Scotty is gonna be right *peeved* ... VBEG

Rated G for absolute purity of content! No sex, no drugs, no rock and
roll:):)

This is a sequel of sorts to moi's story "Waiting For Jeannie"! The
triangle between Jean, Logan, and Scott has long fascinated moi!
"Waiting For Jeannie" was from Logan's POV. This one is from
Scott's:):)

"Waiting For Jeannie can be found at:

Enjoy!:):)

Waiting For Jean: Part Two
By Dannell Lites

You sit quietly and wait. Charles has told you many times that you must
cultivate this virtue. Be patient, he always advises you. Charles is a
wise man and you have always heeded his advice. You believe in his
Dream, yes, you do. It is imperative that you believe. For if mutants
and humans cannot live together in peace then you are lost. You are not
one of the ones who can hide what they are. Magneto cannot be right.
He cannot. ... can he? You have struggled to believe; to do your best
to bring The Dream to fruition. For most of your life you have
struggled. You have fought and trained; raised your voice in quiet
opposition to the man who has been your father since he succored you as
a lost and frightened boy. And you have not counted the cost.

Except maybe for Jean.

The thought that your battle may have cost you the woman you love is
devastating to you. From the beginning there was Jean. The moment you
saw her you were lost. Lost in those clear emerald eyes and that
glorious smile. When you cried, "Good girl, Jean!" in the midst of a
battle, she alone could hear you saying "I love you!" even before she
became the powerful telepath she is today. She has always known you.
The real you; not this cold martinet you all too often show to others.
You have sometimes wondered if it entirely by accident that the two
people who know and love you best, Jean and Charles, are potent
telepaths. The thought that you are so closed off, so tied up within
your self that no one else can really see you is not pleasant. How did
that happen? You do not know. But Jean's happiness is not an option.
It was when you realize that this is true for Logan as well that you
began to understand him. After all, you have at least *one* thing in
common. It is not difficult for you to see why he loves her. And he
does love her. It shines in his eyes when he looks at her; that soft
contentment and deep longing. It was easy to recognize. You see it
every day mirrored in your own eyes. Anxiously, you scan the doorway of
the small boathouse that is your home, searching for a shock of long
red hair, a ready glimpse of jade green eyes. Your hands knot
reflexively into fists at your side. Carefully, deliberately you unfurl
them. No. Anger is not the answer. You will avoid that trap. You have
failed at many things in your life, but you will not fail at this. You
failed as a husband to Madelyn because she was not Jean and you wanted
her to be. You failed as a father to Nathan because there was no time.
Slymm was not enough to save him from becoming Cable. You failed to
protect Alex, your little brother and he died. It occurs to you that
you have failed almost everyone you care about ...

Except maybe for Jean.

Others have failed you as well. That is the nature of humanity.
Charles loves you in his cool, distant way but it has not stopped him
from using you terribly. You are his son in all but blood. Yet time
after time he has sent you to fight for him because his crippled body
will not let him; to lead the only friends you have ever known into the
jaws of Hell. And they have always followed you. There are times you
can scarcely fathom your unworthiness for the procession of such
brothers and sisters.

Your natural father, Corsair has failed you too. He abandoned you.
Abandoned you to the machination of Mister Sinister and his hellish
orphanage. To Charles' well intended training and the increasing pain
of life as a mutant; an outsider. He did not wish to leave you alone
and bereft. He had no choice. You understand this. And yet ... yet
... He was not there for either of your weddings. He was not there for
the birth of his grandson. He was not there when you buried Alex. You
have forgiven him for his initial abandonment. You will never forgive
him for the continual, ongoing abandonment he practices now.

Cable has failed you too. He has failed to nurture that part of him
that Slymm and Redd worked so hard to keep alive. He has guarded his
heart with such steely barriers that you fear he may be unreachable
now. Perhaps Domino may break through where you could not. But through
it all Jean has been there. Not once have you reached for her hand and
grasped the empty air. She is a part of you. A part of you that warms
you when the dreams come in the frightening depths of the night. Yes,
Jean has always been there. Like a part of your body that cannot be
torn away without great pain and blood. You cannot imagine yourself
without her. There are time when you are sure that everyone you know
has failed you in some fashion or another.

Except maybe for Jean.

You are sitting quietly more than twenty feet away, alone on the bed you
share, and still the tremble of her lips tears at your heart as she
steps through the door and quietly closes it behind her. She holds out
her hand to you and the simple gold circle of her wedding band gleams
brightly in the soft light of the small home the two of you have forged
against such terrible odds. In a great rush the breath you have been
unknowingly holding flies from your lungs with a great whoosh. You can
breathe again now. It amazes you that everyone cannot hear your great
shout of joy. But it is buried deep within you like an iceberg floating
on the surface of the sea, the most of it submerged and not visible to
the eye. For a moment the sheer joy of it stuns you. She slips as
silently into your arms as she slipped into your heart. You hold her for
long moments and the two of you cling to one another; nothing more. Her
breath is warm against your damp skin but the feel of her body is sweet.
Your damning eyes see the gentle rise and fall of her breasts, up and
down, up and down. If you could describe your vision of Heaven to
another person it would be to see Jean's face again, as it is,
unencumbered by your ruby quartz prison. Her eyes are calm and full of
love. But the rest of her shakes and trembles under the assault of
sadness and loss. Your heart remembers the feel of her happiness at
Logan's smile, the sound of her laughter, the touch of her hand. The
echo of her voice releasing your name with a final caress. She desired
you. No one else before her had ever done this for you. She loves you
and thereby taught you your own worth. No one else had ever cared
enough to teach you this simple thing.

Except maybe for Jean.

It is clear that she will be staying with you. She will not go with
Logan. No, she will stay with you and her family. You, who have
scarcely known a family. It would be easy, now, to shout in triumph;
to exalt in your victory. Easy and damaging. These are selfish
things. Her eyes ... those beautiful emerald gates to your happiness,
sparkle now with unshed tears, stabbing at you with sharp, merciless
blades. Does she need Logan so badly, you wonder? Is he that important
to her? Perhaps, without him, your Phoenix is not complete? Disturbing
thoughts. But how true are they? Truer than you would like them to be,
of that you are certain.

When the first scalding tear trickles down Jeans face, you are lost.

Wordless, you reach for her. Like a falling oak, The Phoenix,
Tiphareth, Child of The Sun, lowers her head onto your chest and weeps.
Your body moistened with her tears, you join her. It is clear to you
now what must be done. But ... can you do it? Can you? It's a simple
thing, really. So very simple. All you have to do is say the word.
Let her know that she is free. That you will not cage her. She is your
Phoenix, risen from the ashes ... and that she must follow her heart
wherever it leads her. It's not too late. Logan, you know, will
return, eventually. Simple ... so very simple ... All you have to do is
open your mouth and speak.

All you have to do is tear out your heart.

"God, I'm sorry, Jean," you whisper in her ear, "I'm so sorry ..."

With trembling lips you kiss her eyes closed to shut out the sight of
her pain. The sharp, salt tang of her tears is almost overpowering,
invading your body, becoming a part of you. You stroke her hair.
Beneath your caress she seems to quiet, like a wild animal brought to
sudden, inexplicable domestication. You've seem Logan do that and it
always amazes you. She lifts her head and tries to smile, a wan effort.

"I want her to see my eyes," you think in desperation. But she cannot.
No one can. Even you have forgotten what color they are.

They're brown. I haven't forgotten. I love you, Scott Summers.

Jean ... I-I ... I won't stop you. If you need him ... if you want him
... if he makes you happy ... Just as long as there's a little room left
for me ...

There. It is done. It is said. There is no going back now, is there?

Startled, she regards you closely, searching for the truth. You must
dig deep for the joy she needs to see. Like a fountain, it wells up
within you and comes spilling out your eyes. Joy begets joy and the
relief and happiness you see mirrored on that beautiful face are worth
whatever pain has given them birth. Her arms enfold you and her hand
curls around the back of your neck protectively. Her hand spreads over
your chest, just above your heart .

How could there not be? Room for you? Of course there's room for you
in my heart. You *are* my heart, Scott Summers.

And then she is within you, quietly ghosting along the corridors of your
mind, leaving soothing love and joy in her wake. Her joy is your joy, a
part of you now, just as she is. Whatever happens now, you have made
Jean happy. Nothing can take that from you. Nothing.

Still you sit quiet, but no loner alone and no longer waiting. You will
never be alone. What will happen now you do not know. Jean is the one
who will decide. If she takes Logan as a lover, then you will be happy
for the joy they share. Jean's happiness will not diminish your own;
only increase it. If she loves Logan that does not diminish her love
for you. Is the human heart so small that there can be room for only
one within it? No. Jean loves you. It is enough.

As you hear the jeep pull away from the house with a plaintive roar; you
spy the quick flash of pain in Jean's eyes and flinch as though the
agony were lodged in your own body. Jean is swift to shield you from
her psychic pain through the link you share. Amazed, you enfold her in
strong arms, silently, feeling unworthy. You have always felt
unworthy. But Jean has taught you differently, hasn't she? It is in
striving to accept her love, to be worthy of it, that you have
discovered your own worth. That is a battle you have won at last.
Jean's last gift to you.

Your name is Scott Summers and they tell you that you are the Leader of
The X-Men. The best of them all; Charles' avatar ... That you are a
noble man and fine leader. You have endured and done your best to be a
good man. They tell you that you have succeeded. You have done many
brave things and many hard and difficult things in your short life ...
and in all that life you fear that no has ever really loved you ...

Except maybe for Jean.

The End