Random Omake: Bash the Author!

~*~

Kenshin: (insert any stupid tactless comment that would send Kaoru into a violent rage)

Kaoru *eyes searing red*: Kenshin... no... BAKA! *sends Kenshin into orbit*

CIA (Characterization In Anime) agent *enters carrying a briefcase and a huge binder full of paper*: Excuse me, is this the Kamiya dojo?

Kaoru *instantly business-like*: Hai! Are you a prospective student?

CIA *eyeing her in disdain*: Actually, I'm here to revoke your fanfiction license.

Kaoru *wide eyes*: WHAT?!

CIA *reading from the binder*: Well, according to my sources, and a long, painstaking research period, you are currently suffering from a common ailment of certain fanfiction characters, recently categorized as "CACC", or Cross-Anime-Characterization-Contamination. You have, in the past and not twenty seconds ago, shown characteristics of one Akane Tendo.

Kaoru: Cross-Anime-Wha-?

CIA *fiddling with glasses*: I'm deeply grieved to inform you of this (well actually, I'm taking this twisted sort of satisfaction from watching you squirm, but that's besides the point) but I'm afraid I have to revoke your license. Until you recover from this unfortunate character fault, you cannot appear in any further stories.

Kaoru *angry and indignant*: Now wait just a minute, you can't-

CIA *snaps fingers; Kaoru vanishes from existence*: Ah, much quieter now.

Kenshin *returns from his vacational orbit only to find Kaoru replaced by the CIA*: Oro? Kaoru-dono? *glares at CIA* This is YOUR fault again, isn't it.

CIA *shrug*: Just doing my job.

Kenshin *fists raised*: CIA... no... BAKA! *sends CIA flying into orbit*

Kaoru *poofs into existence*: Hoo! Well, it's about time!

Kenshin *huffing*: Kaoru-dono, WHY are you such a problem sometimes?

Kaoru: Me?!

Kenshin *suddenly defensive*: Yes, you! You're always attracting these pesky CIAs... I can't send them *all* flying...

Kaoru *muttering*: Kenshin no baka.

Kenshin *Battousai-eyes* Stupid macho chick.

CIA *a bit battered, knocking on the open dojo door*: E-excuse me... is this the Kamiya dojo...?

*Collective groan*

Kenshin: Kaoru-dono, you haven't even been here for a full minute, and already you've...

CIA *gaining a bit of confidence* Himura Kenshin, I presume? You are hereby revoked of your fanfiction license, due to a serious CACC fault... you have, not twenty seconds ago, shown actions and speech characteristic of one Akane Tendo... er, *and* Ranma Saotome, go fig...

Kenshin *deadpan*: I hate my life. *ceases to exist*

Kaoru: CIA... no... BAKA! *sends him flying into orbit* And stay there. Kenshin no baka, why aren't YOU back yet?

*knock knock*

Kaoru *fuming*: NO! This is NOT the Kamiya dojo! *slam*

Kenshin *on the other side of the door, a door-shaped impression on his face and swirling-eyes* Ororo...

~*~
Owari
(And if only it could end the cycle of CACC insanity!)
~*~

Dedicated to ChaosBurnFlame, who introduced the wonderful concept of CACC... it amused me to no end...

To read his rant, go here:

http:// tanukitoryuu.anifics.com / cacc.html
Oh, and if you're curious to know why I chose the title... CACC *is* the fault of the author, is it not? ^_^