"99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer!" sang Michelo as
he danced around on the BEB.
"Take one down . . ."
"Shoot Michelo with a round . . ." hissed a disgruntled Urube.
"99 bottles of MEEP!" Michelo had to duck, as the plush chair he was
sitting in was suddenly full of bullet holes.
"Urube, how many times do I have to tell you rule number 27 of the
BEB? 'Don't shoot/strangle/stab/drown/suffocate/attack/throw any of your
fellow BEB passengers!" Uncle Virgil wagged his finger at Urube, who
answered by growling.
"Yeah, hush up!" hissed Wong. Urube looked at the former Prime
Minister and raised an eyebrow when he saw the pocky-eater bent over beside
Uncle Virgil, as if directing him.
"What are you doing?" he muttered.
"Trying to hit squirrels!" cackled Wong.
"How many times do I have to tell you, they're DEMONS, not
SQUIRRELS!" exclaimed Virgil. Michelo blinked a few times before asking,
"Can I throw beer bottles at the demonic squirrels?"
"No," replied Virgil.
"No. . ."
"Beer. . . Umm. . ." Michelo paused to look around, "Beer. . . Beer?"
"NO!" screamed Virgil as he slammed on the brakes, causing Michelo to
fly forward into the windshield of the BEB.
"That's what you get for not wearing seatbelts! ^_______^ Kehehehe!"
Wong had a very wide grin on his face as he said this, while Urube tried to
count how many demonic squirrels the bus had passed. Michelo slid to the
floor in anguish before attempting to whack Virgil with a beer bottle.
Virgil's calm eyes narrowed as a bolt of pink fluff hit Michelo in the
"What the . . . why do I sound like a chipmunk?" asked Michelo,
sounding like he had just sucked a lot of helium.
"It's my special Virgil-ish powers," smirked Virgil, "I can make
anyone's voice sound like a chipmunk!"
"As if his voice wasn't squeaky enough already," grumbled Wong as he
wiped off his omnipresent glasses.
"22 Demonic Squirrels." Urube was still counting the squirrels.
"Shut up, Wong!" squeaked Michelo, "At least I don't sound like . . .
like . . ."
"That's right!" laughed Wong, "My voice is way sexier than yours!"
"23 Demonic Squirrels."
"Is nooooot!" whined Michelo.
"24 Demonic Squirrels. _;;;"
"Is too! Is too! Is too!"
"I think I have a sexy voice," chirped Virgil.
"At least I don't sound like I have a beer bottle stuck up my
patoosh," grumbled Michelo as much as a chipmunk voice could.
"26. THAT'S IT!" Urube was mad: the argument had caused the Major to
lose count. God knows what horrors awaited Wong, Michelo, and Virgil . . .
. . . Until Virgil used his powers on Urube.
"This cannot be," whispered Urube as he touched his throat, "I can't
sound like a helium-induced madman!"
"Urube with a squeaky voice? The world has ended," Wong blinked
before staring at Virgil, "Those powers of yours are pretty impressive, but
they can't match mine!"
"You think so, Prime Minister?" Virgil smiled as he pulled into a
Hellish rest stop.
"Yes, you may be able to make people have squeaky voices, but can you
sit in a plush chair with this much class?" Wong pulled out his omnipresent
red plush chair and sat in it, flashing his most charming fangirl-magnet
smile. A group of fangirls passing by noticed Wong, and instantly fell into
"Fangirls think that THAT is impressive?" Urube chuckled in his evil
chipmunk voice, causing a few of the fangirls' faces to fault, "Virgil!
Give me back my voice at once so I can prove Wong wrong once and for all!"
Virgil looked at Urube with determined eyes and nodded, "Anything to prove
him wrong!" Urube smirked as he felt his normal fiendish voice returning.
He turned towards Wong and chuckled, "You can't beat this. for in event of
such an event, I trained this body to perfection!" And with that, Urube
ripped off his military jacket, tie, and shirt ala G Gundam Episode 48. The
fangirls that had been staring at Wong let their eyes avert to the Major,
who was beaming with pride.
"You may be able to show off your Dragon Ball Z wannabe muscles, but
can you do THIS?" Wong spun around to face the fangirls, his usual suit
transforming into a super-cute blue robe and a large teddy bear forming in
his hands. He sat on a nearby park bench and let his head rest on the teddy
bear, letting his eyes sparkle with pure kawaiiness. The fangirls who had
been gawking at Urube immediately looked at Wong before rushing over and
hugging/kissing/etc. the Prime Minister.
"I can't beat that," sighed Michelo, "Can you?"
"I refuse to hug a teddy bear like that," growled Urube.
"Will we ever get to Heaven?" sighed Virgil.