A/N I always thought the story of what happened to Pamela would be interesting, and that she could tell Clark more about Lex. So here goes my view of it. . . It starts the first several paragraphs from the episode CRUSH. I take no credit for that work, it was done by the creative show writers. I think this story will be about 6 chapters. Review please!

Chapter 1

Lex entered Pamela's hospital room with the book she had been looking through at the mansion. He set the book on the bedside table.

Pamela was amazed to see him. "You're the last person I expected to see."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Asked Lex.

"It's not your concern. "

Lex was not happy with that answer. "It's not my concern that you're dying? I could help you. I can get you treatment. "

"I didn't come to you for help or pity. I came because I have nothing left to lose. The truth is, I'm ashamed that it took metastasizing to give me the courage. I let that bastard frighten me into submission for so long. I was too scared to even tell you just once... how much you mean to me. How much I wanted to help you grow up. "

"I wish you had. I might be a better man," Lex said with complete sincerity; he knew himself, knew the man he was, a man he didn't always like very much.

"The fact that you're here speaks volumes about the man that you are. Your mother would be proud."

"I really miss her," was the only answer Lex could give.

"So do I." Agreed Pamela as she reached for Lex's hand and he took it. After a time he gently squeezed her hand then stood. "I have to go talk to the Doctors about getting you moved to Metropolis. There's a good Cancer Center just outside the City. I'd like you to let me set you up there?"

"Alexander. I told you. . ." Lex interrupted, "I know, and I believe you. But I should have believed in you a long time ago instead of listening to my father's lies."

She heard the anger and guilt in his voice. Anger at his father for lying, and at himself for believing those lies. "I will not let you help me out of guilt. I have enough stock left to take care of myself."

"It's not just guilt. Please believe me. You were right when you said we were close. Let me help you for old times sake." By the end his tone was somewhere between a command and a plea.

She nodded slightly. "For old times sake."

He smiled at her and walked out, promising to return in a moment after speaking with the doctors. As he walked back to the room he saw a familiar face. "Clark. What brings you here?"

"Whitney's dad. How about you?"

After considering for a moment Lex motioned Clark to follow him. "Come see for yourself."

Pamela looked up from the book as they entered, and smiled uncertainly.

"Pam, I'd like to introduce you to a good friend of mine. Clark Kent. Clark this is Pamela."

Clark smiled, "Nice to meet you."

"And you. Sit down boys."

Clark's eyes widened slightly, no one called Lex a boy, no one. He wondered exactly who this woman was. Even Lex usual cool façade couldn't hide the concern and care he felt for her. As they sat he thought back to what Lex had said earlier. "I've only loved two women in my life. One died and the other betrayed me." He knew the one who died was Lex mother, could this be the one who betrayed him?

Pamela's question got his attention. "How do you two know each other?"

Lex got a slightly sheepish look on his face, a rare sight. "I was driving, too fast, and crashed over the side of a bridge into the river. Clark jumped in and saved me."

It was Clark's turn to look sheepish. "Anyone would have done the same," he tried to dodge. "Lex has helped me out a few times since then. He sent me a new truck as a thank you gift."

"Which you returned," Lex reminded him.

"Not because I didn't want to keep it." Clark reminded him.

Pamela smiled indulgently at Lex, but spoke to Clark. "He always was a bit extravagant. Never believed in moderation. In speed, gifts or emotions."

"Should I go so you can really talk about me as if I'm not here?" Asked Lex in a wry tone.

"'You know, that's not a bad idea." Clark joked back.

"Don't even think about leaving, it's been to long since I've seen you."

"I'll go and let you two catch up," volunteered Clark.

"No, please stay."

Clark decided to ask the question first in his mind. "So how do you know Lex?"

"I'm not sure what Lex has told you. His Mother's health was not good for a long time. I was Lex, nanny, I guess would be the term. But mostly I just helped Lillian and did the things her health wouldn't allow her to."

"She was like an Aunt to me. Mom and I did not consider her "hired help". "

"Let me take a wild guess and say your father did?"

Pam laughed. "I see you've met Lionel."

"He let Mom have her way, and it didn't affect him much since he wasn't around much," was Lex, far to casual, response.

Time passed quickly as they talked and laughed. Clark was amazed, he'd never seen Lex so relaxed and at ease, it was a good sight.

They were interrupted by the ringing of Lex phone. After a quick conversation he stood. "I have to go. I'm sorry, Pam." The other two could easily read the genuine regret in his eyes and hear it in his voice.

"Like you told me, you're a busy young man. Will I see you later?" She asked in a hopeful voice.

"Yes. This shouldn't take more than a couple hours." He turned to Clark. "Can I give you a ride home?"

"No thanks. I got the old truck."

"If Clark doesn't mind I could still use the company."

"I don't mind," came Clark's immediate reply.

Lex sighed mock-dramatically. "I don't guess there's anything left you can say behind my back that you haven't said in front of me." He then turned serious. "Clark, do me a favor and make sure she gets some rest."

"OK."

Once Lex had gone Pam looked carefully at the young man across from her. "I'm glad Lex has a friend like you here." At Clark's questioning look she continued, "I heard the stories of him in Metropolis, saw the news articles, he ran with a wild crowd. Did anything to get his father's attention and try to tarnish the Luthor name. It's good to see he's found a place here, and a good friend."

"He's a good guy."

"Yes, he is. Which is an amazing feat considering who he was raised by. I cannot tell you how happy it makes me to see Lionel hasn't corrupted him totally. I wish I could have been there but Lionel wouldn't allow it. What is Lex like now?"

Clark thought for a minute before answering. "He's complicated. I think there's a lot to him he doesn't let others, even his friends, see." Clark didn't tell her he also had secrets he didn't tell his friends. In that he figured he and Lex were even, and he didn't hold it against his friend. He also couldn't forget Ryan telling him Lex had a lot of darkness he kept hidden from the world. Clark figured that had a lot to do with his father, and hoped that away from his father it would lessen. He remembered something Lex had told him that he could share. "He once told me he'd do anything to help his friends, and I believe that."

"Even having just met you, I can tell you're a good influence on him. Thank you. And I want to ask you a favor. Don't give up on him. I don't think his father is through with him and he'll need help to fight that. He'll need a friend. He doesn't want to admit that he needs anyone, but he does, we all do, and for a long time he's had no one. I'm glad he has you now."

"Thank you, and I will try to help him."

"That's all I can ask. I wish I could be here to do it myself."

"Can I ask what's wrong?"

"Cancer."

"I'm sorry."

"No need to be. At least it gave me a reason, and a chance, to see Alexander again."

Clark tried to reassure her. "If it makes you feel better, he does love you."

"What makes you say that?"

"I was asking him for advise on women, he told me he'd loved two women in his life. One was his mother, the other was you; he didn't say your name, but it was you."

"Thank you. That helps, but I know he hated me for years, and he deserved to. I abandoned him, left him to his father. But I didn't have a choice, Lionel is very good at getting what he wants and he wants Lex to be just like him, it's why I worried about Lex. That's why Lionel sent me away, so Lex would be his son not his mother's."

"He still loves and misses her. Even gone she's been a force for good in his life. I think her memory is part of why he fights his father so hard."

"I'm glad."

Their conversation stopped when the nurse entered. "Time for your medicine."

"I'll go and let you get some rest. It was really nice to meet you."

"I hope I'll se you again."

Clark answered her with a nod as he left.