In MY timeline: Weiss is still under Kritiker. Schwarz is under Estet. Takatori Reiji is dead and Manx is Weiss's contact with Kritiker. Weiss opened another flower shop with the same name in another part of Japan, and are presumed dead to Aya-chan and the rest. I'm mixed up about the plotlines in the manga and anime so I'm really not sure when this should be set in.

WARNING: Shounen ai content! May become yaoi over time. You've been warned.

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Shades of Gray

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Three: A Day Off

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*Is it really okay for assassins like us to get attached to others?* That sentence echoed in Nagi's mind, refusing to go away. It was there when he finally went to sleep, tossing and turning in his bed. It was there in his dreams, together with Omi's sad eyes and melancholic expression. It was there when he woke up after two hours of sleep, haunting his every thought. It was driving him nuts.

*Why can't I get it out of my head?* he wondered as he grumpily plopped himself down on his seat at the kitchen table, not yet dressed for school. Brad glanced up with a raised eyebrow, decided it was nothing serious, and went back to his newspaper and coffee. Farf didn't even look up from his red-dyed milk and cereal. Schuldich was the only one whose head raised and stayed raised.

[ What's the matter on this fine Friday morning, Nagi? ]

The telekinetic glared at the telepath. [ Get out of my mind, Schu, ] he projected the thought to the German.

[ Nothing doing. I sense troubled thoughts, little guy, and one especially nagging thought that keeps repeating over and over. ]

Nagi sighed. [ It's nothing that won't go away, unlike you, ] he 'muttered'.

[ But - ]

"Stop irritating Nagi, Schuldich," a calm voice broke into their mental conversation. "Otherwise in about two minutes, he'll either dump Farfarello's cereal onto your mop of hair which will result Farf trying to eat it up, and I don't mean only the cereal, or ram you into next Tuesday - or rather the nearest tree, whichever is closer."

Schuldich cast a wary look at Farf, who gave no sign of having heard their American leader, and inched farther away from both the Irishman and the Japanese boy. "Thanks for the warning, Brad," he said with a hint of nervousness at the thought of Farf munching on his prized hair or being slammed into a tree by Nagi's telekinetic power. Brad's visions were broken into many scenes that showed the different ways the future could go, depending on the decisions made by the people involved.

Brad glared at the redhead. "It's Crawford. Do not call me Brad. Understood?"

Schuldich smirked. "Yeah, understood - Brad."

The American sighed. "Why do I even bother?" he muttered to himself. Deciding to ignore him, Brad turned to Nagi who was staring morosely at the milk pouring itself into his cereal.

"Nagi, have the files been decoded?" he asked.

"He stayed up all night and morning to finish the files so that you could get started on them today and not wait until he finished school to come back and do the decoding since he wants to complete this mission as soon as possible and so he got hardly two hours of sleep and he looks half dead right now," Schuldich rattled off in one breath. He took another and added, "Why don't you let him skip school today? Give him a break. Besides, you know that he could teach -them- a few things about what they're teaching him."

Nagi looked up at Schuldich, a little surprised. But he should have known - in Schwarz, Schuldich knew him best and always kept an eye out for him.

He looked back at Crawford. The man was scrutinizing Nagi, after which he sighed. "You're right, Schuldich. Nagi, I'll let you skip school for today. Leave the arrangements to me. You can stay in the house or go out, as long as you're back here by eight p.m. sharp."

Nagi smiled in relief. "Thanks, Crawford, Schu. I really needed that." He got up from the table, cereal bowl in hand. "I think I'll go back up and send the files to your computer, finish my breakfast and then go back to sleep. See you all later."

Schuldich waved as he went out. "Don't stress yourself out!" he called.

Nagi waved back without turning around. "Sure," he called back. Halfway up the stairs, he paused before projecting his thoughts to the telepath downstairs. [ Schu? ]

[ Hmm? ]

[ Is it really okay for assassins like us to get attached to others? ]

[ Why'd you suddenly ask? ]

[ Someone asked me that. It's what's been bothering me. And I thought, well... you seem the right person to ask, though why, I don't know. ]

[ Was that an insult? Listen, Nagi. We're assassins, yes, but we're human - hell, we're better than mere humans! We can't keep to ourselves forever; the loneliness would make our performance go down - we'd become more reckless, because then we'd think, who'd miss us if we're gone? But if you know others care for you, you wouldn't be so careless with your own life, see? Because then you'd be hurting them too if anything happened to you. ]

[ Yeah... ]

[ And if you care for someone, you'll want to protect them no matter what. You don't want to see them hurt, or die. It gives you the determination and strength to see things through and not get injured or die halfway, because you want to see them again, healthy and whole, and you hope they'll want to see you too. It's motivation to stay alive. ]

[ That... makes sense. ]

[ Of course it does, what do you take me for? It's how I'm able to keep a part of myself safe from all the other people's thoughts that crowd into my head - because I know if I lose it, I'll endanger you all. And I care for you people, believe it or not; you've become family, the only one I've ever had. I'd have gone mad by myself; it's you people who have stuck by me and helped me through it all.

[ But remember, it's just that sometimes? You let your feelings cloud your judgement. Never forget to think things through clearly and logically, and not let emotions control you. You'll make a lot of stupid mistakes that way, believe me, and I'd hate it if you got yourself killed trying to save one of us. ]

[ Schu... ]

[ And one more thing. We're not only assassins. We're people that assassinate others for a job; a family that depends on each member to do their part so that we can all come out of it alive. 'Assassins like us' - there's no such thing, because we aren't only that. I'm an irritating, smirking telepath and you're an angsty teenage telekinetic and we just happen to work as assassins. It might make relationships a little more difficult to handle, but sure, it's okay if you want to go to the trouble to have one. We deserve it as much as anyone else, more so because they're all deluded idiots. ]

There was a Pause.

[ Nagi? Are you in shock at hearing me actually saying something profound? It's just that I'm right, in fact I always am, and I don't want you to become as angsty and secretive as the Weiss kittens insist on acting - ]

[ Schu. ]

[ I don't know why they keep their feelings to themselves; I mean they obviously care for each other a lot so I don't know why they act like everything's fine around each other - ]

[ Schu! ]

[ What? ]

[ I think you're right, all of it. There's a surprisingly lucid mind underneath that mane of yours. ]

[ Hey! ]

[ I don't know what I'd do without a brother like you. So thanks. ]

He felt the German's smile in his mind as he continued up the stairs to his room, and a surprisingly quiet [ You're welcome. ]

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"Time..." Omi rubbed his eyes and glanced blearily at the clock next to his bed. It read 10:28.

"Ten thirty... it's almost... TEN THIRTY?" he screeched as he shot upright. "Shimatta!"

He jumped out of bed and yelped as he tripped over the tangled bed sheets in a very Ken-like manner, thudding painfully onto the ground. "Itai..." he groaned.

"Hey, Omi, I heard - what're you doing?" Ken asked wide-eyed as he poked his head through the doorway.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" grumbled the smaller boy as Ken went over to help untangle him from the sheets. "I'm two and a half hours late for school and tripping over my own feet, is what I'm doing. Why didn't my alarm work?"

Ken laughed as he pulled Omi free. "Don't worry, little guy, I disabled your alarm clock. I knew you'd have stayed up all night to do the file-decoding thing, so I asked our fearless leader to let you have a day off from school, and say you're sick or something. It took me quite a while to convince him, but he agreed."

Omi sighed in relief and grinned up at Ken. "Thanks, Ken. I really don't think I could have stayed awake in class today."

Ken grinned and offered a hand to Omi, pulling the boy up to his feet. "Aya says once you wake up, you should go help out in the shop till lunch. After that you're free to do as you want."

Omi stared incredulously. "Aya's letting an able hand go free?"

"That took quite a bit of convincing too."

Omi blinked, smiled and then gave Ken an impulsive hug. The brunette blinked at his sudden armful, then hugged him back.

Omi wondered if he should ask Ken the question that was plaguing him. But as he looked up into Ken's smiling, concerned face with worries hidden in their glowing depths, he decided against it. It would bring up needless memories about all of their past lives, if he asked any of his team mates - they all had emotional scars that wouldn't fade so easily, because they all cared so much. He didn't want to bother them, and make them think he was still a kid who didn't know tact.

They let go of each other, and Ken grinned at the boy. "I'd better get down there, and you'd better hurry up too before Aya kills us both!"

"I know, you go on first, I'll be right down." Omi watched as Ken waved and left the room, calling after him, "And watch for the stairs!"

"What do you take me for, a hopeless klutz - Yeow!" Omi winced as he heard yelps and thumps coming from outside his room and, at the end of it all, two pained 'oof's.

-Two- pained 'oof's?

Omi stuck his head outside and looked down the stairs, seeing Yohji blearily do the same, blinking sleep from his eyes. Omi winced as he saw Ken and Aya in a pile at the bottom of the stairs. Apparently, Ken had barrelled into their red-haired leader.

The brunette scrambled up, wide-eyed in panic. "Gomen! I didn't see - I didn't mean - are you hurt?"

Scowling, Aya ignored the outstretched hand and stood, brushing his clothes off. "I'm fine," he said coldly. He looked up the stairs at his curious audience, missing the dejected look on Ken's face. "Kudou, Omi, breakfast is in the kitchen. Omi, you and I have the morning shift, so hurry up."

"Hai!" Omi gave Ken a sympathetic smile, then popped back into his room. He grabbed some clothes, ran to the bathroom to wash up and dress, then made his way downstairs.

Ken was eating breakfast, and he looked up to give Omi a small, sheepish smile before returning to his food again. Omi shook his head, smiling, then went to get his own breakfast. Aya was already in the shop, managing by himself since it was school time and there weren't any screaming girls.

It was eleven by the time Omi joined Aya in the shop, and he picked up a pair of shears and started pruning a plant. It was quiet, and peaceful, and he supposed he should be happy instead of thinking that it wasn't okay for him to be happy.

It wasn't okay for assassins like them to be attached to others, he was sure. After all, there had to be some kind of penance for all the blood on their hands, all the lives they had ruined. And it put others in danger, too, since their enemies would target the ones they loved.

But in that case, didn't it mean it was okay for assassins to be attached to assassins? Because no matter who loved who the assassins were natural targets, anyway, for their victims, and so it didn't matter if they cared for each other, since they were already in equal amounts of danger. But if the one they cared for was in danger then wouldn't you put yourself in even more danger trying to save that person from danger since you were concentrating on them and not the real danger...?

Argh.

"Omi, the plant."

"What? Oh. OH." Omi looked down at the plant in his hands - a plant bare of leaves with only the flower left at the top, shivering dismally in the cold air of the shop. He winced. "Sorry, Aya."

"Omi. What's wrong?"

He smiled up at Aya. "Oh, nothing," he said with false cheer. "Just thinking. Sorry about the plant, I'll just throw it away - "

"You are not going anywhere."

"Aya?"

The redhead gave a little sigh. "What's wrong?" he repeated.

Omi groaned inwardly. Great, just the time for Aya to start being concerned, when he -didn't- want any concern. Quickly he thought of something that was sure to put Aya off. "Do you care for Weiss, Aya? As a family, not as a source of income? People you can care for like you did Aya- chan?"

He smiled bleakly at the closed look on Aya's face. "See, Aya, some things you can't say." Omi picked up the unfortunate plant, and turned to go.

"Yes."

He processed the word. His brain poked it, turned it around, and ascertained that it was in the positive. He turned around again. "Yes?" he repeated incredulously.

"Yes, I care for you three idiots," the redhead said levelly. "And I think you can call me Ran, now. That's my real name."

There was total silence in the shop, save for the sound of traffic outside.

"You'd let us call you by your real name - "

"Wow, the ice block's finally melted!"

"You care for us? You actually care?"

Ran glared at the two newcomers. Yohji was smirking and Ken was looking hopeful. "You were eavesdropping," he stated.

"Sorry, but... you really care?" Ken wouldn't let the question go.

"Yes," Ran said coldly.

"You'd let us call you 'Ran'?" Omi prodded.

"-Yes-. Why were you two eavesdropping?"

Yohji's smirk vanished, and he nodded towards Omi. "Because chibi over there seems to have something big on his mind," he replied.,

Oh, this was just great.

Omi looked around at all three faces - one cold, one serious, and one worried - and knew that he couldn't get out of this. Sighing, he muttered, "It's not okay for assassins like us to get attached to others, is it?"

"What?"

He repeated the question.

"Who gave you that idea?"

"Yohji."

Ran turned a glare full-blast on the playboy, and Ken looked at him reproachfully.

"What? Me? When? I wouldn't - I didn't - " Yohji floundered under the two accusing gazes. "I never!"

"When was that?" Ran asked coldly without taking his eyes off Yohji.

"It isn't really his fault, Ran-kun, Ken-kun," Omi said quickly, always fair. "It's just, he said something that made me think, last night."

"Excuse me, my dears? Could one of you help me?"

"I'll go!" Yohji volunteered quickly, before scampering off to help the elderly customer who had just come in. That left Omi to cringe under Ran's searching stare and Ken's anxious gaze.

"Omi."

"Hai?" the blond squeaked.

"We are still human. We can still feel. We care for each other, and that makes us work better as a team. It is not wrong."

They stared open-mouthed at Ran.

"What?"

"You made a speech."

"Yes."

"A speech that didn't involve holier-than-thou commands."

"-Yes-."

"A speech that showed you actually think like a human."

Ran's eyebrow twitched, and Omi quickly intervened before Ken's uncharacteristic attempt at suicide got any worse. "Ran-kun, so you mean it's okay? Even though we're, well, who we are?"

"If you care for a person, you have to deal with the consequences. In our case, we have to be more careful about who we choose to get attached to, but it is not wrong."

"But we have to think of the other person," Ken said quietly. "We have to think if it's right to drag her into our world, to involve her with the blood on our hands. In our case, possibly the only people we -can- care about are others in the same line of work."

"Only those in our team," Ran corrected. "Others like Schwarz - we cannot trust them. Bastards like them cannot feel."

Omi's heart sank, but he found the courage to say, "What if Schwarz isn't as bad as you think?"

Ran's cold glare could freeze ice. "Then I think you should reconsider your loyalty to Weiss."

He turned on his heel and left, leaving Omi staring morosely at the floor. Ken rested a hand on his shoulder. "Hey, it's okay," the brunet said softly. "We all know how much you care about Weiss. Aya - no, it's Ran now, ne? Ran just hates Schwarz, and he said that in a fit of anger. Don't take it to heart."

Omi tried to smile. "I know, Ken-kun. Would you mind helping me throw away this flower? And hang up my apron? It's lunchtime, and I think I'll go out now."

Ken smiled reassuringly back. "Sure," he replied, taking the items from Omi. "Be back by nine, though, okay? Maybe earlier, since we might discuss the mission after we've read the information you decoded."

"Sure. I'll eat outside, so I'll see you later tonight."

"Have fun, chibi."

Omi waved as he walked out of the shop, but his mood was down. Perhaps Ran was right, and he really shouldn't have anything to do with Schwarz. But Prodigy had been so... normal. He was just a kid, really, a kid younger than even he was! Nobody that young should have to deal with so much death.

He walked aimlessly, so lost in thought that he found himself in the middle of the city, half an hour's walk from the urban area the Koneko no Sumu Ie was located in. He spotted a mall in the distance, and decided to head there. There might just be an arcade inside, and he wanted to kill people who would not beg for their lives.

There was an arcade on the fifth floor. Omi took the escalator, taking his time to watch as people laughed and hung out, or hurried here and there. He watched as couples hugged, or just sat there side by side, and something stirred in him. He looked away.

The arcade was rather full, he saw, as he made his way through the crowd. While exchanging his money for chips, he noticed there was a rather large group around one of the game stations. "What's that, over there?" he asked the man behind the counter.

"Oh, it's one of those shooting games, you against all those computer people," the man replied, glancing over.

"Why's there a crowd?"

The man craned his neck to look, then nodded. "Ah, thought so. The guy playing is one of our more frequent customers, and he's one of the best. People like to watch him, to pick up tips, though personally, I think you can't pick up anything from just watching. It's your skill that does it."

Omi thanked the man, and went over to watch. He managed to squeeze to the front of the crowd, and had to admit that the boy -was- pretty good. The game was one of the harder ones, too, it was true. He'd play it later; all the other stations were full and didn't look like they were going to be empty anytime soon, judging from the people around them.

He squeezed back out, saw a vacated seat, and took it. It was a racing game - not that interesting, but maybe he was wrong. He slotted a few coins inside, then started the game.

A few minutes later, after breezing through quite a few levels and waiting for the next, he realized he had an audience. One older teen caught his eyes and commented, grinning, "You're really good, kid. Most people drop at five, but you're at eight and still have no problem."

Omi smiled at him. "Beginner's luck," he explained.

The boy raised an eyebrow. "Beginner?" he asked disbelievingly.

"Haven't played in years." And it was true; he hadn't found the time.

"You're kidding."

"No, I'm not." And with that Omi turned back to the game, murmurs rippling through the crowd around him. He grinned inwardly.

He made it to the last level five minutes later, to claps and cheers from his audience. When the computer asked for his name for the high score lists with a five-letter limit, he typed in 'Bmbay'. It didn't mean anything to other people, anyway, just a name.

The high score list flashed. Omi stared; the top three scorers - he was second - had high scores that far, far surpassed the rest. The third was 'Casp' and the first was...

'Prdgy'.

Could it just be a coincidence?

"Hey kid."

Omi looked up into open brown eyes under messy black bangs as he got out from his seat. The older boy was taller than him and slightly stockier. He held out a hand, which Omi shook.

"My name's Casper, what's yours?"

They pushed out from the crowd as someone else got into Omi's vacated seat. Casper... it was the same boy he had seen, the one the man had said was one of the best. "You're 'Casp' on the high score list?" he asked as they strolled down the games aisles.

A friendly grin was flashed his way. "Got that right. And I was beaten by someone who says he hasn't played in years. Who're you?"

"Call me Omi."

"Omi? Then what's with the b-m-b-a-y?"

"Oh, that's a nickname. It's Bombay, actually."

"Bombay? Interesting. Most people use their real names, to get fame, you know? But the only two people who bested me use fake names, except the other guy didn't tell me his real one."

Omi stared. "You've met Prodigy?"

Casper blinked at him. "How'd you know his name's Prodigy?"

"I guessed from the name on the list," Omi lied. "What's he look like?"

"Smaller than you; thinner, too. Dark blue eyes, dark brown hair. Quiet, but damn good at the games. You've met?"

So it -was- Prodigy. It had to be fate, that Omi had chosen to come to this particular arcade. "He's... sort of a friend."

Casper grinned. "What a coincidence! He's sort of a legend here, you know? Played every game station once each and got top scores for all of them, and pushed me to second. He's come a few times, but I take it this is your first?"

Omi nodded.

"Well then, let's see if you can best me at my favourite game. Even Prodigy can't."

They arrived at the game console Omi had watched Casper play at earlier. The boy currently playing had just lost, and was glumly moving out of the way. Casper clapped him on the back. "Tough luck, Joey! Hey guys, let this guy here play, okay?"

"Isn't that the beginner guy who beat your score at Top Speed?" a voice called out.

"Yep, he's the one," Casper said cheerfully. "Calls himself Bombay."

"Any relation to Prodigy?" someone else asked.

"Oh, he's a friend," Casper replied.

"Then maybe he'll beat you!" Joey laughed.

Casper winked. "We'll see. Come on, let's get started."

And so Omi moved into position, slotted the coins in, picked up the 'gun' and played. It was simple, really, just shoot at the people who popped out from behind cardboard boxes and whatnot. He'd done this so many times, it was easy to duck and hide from the figures on the screen. And his aim was flawless, even though he usually used bows instead of guns.

It took him twenty minutes to get through all levels, and the top score list proudly displayed 'Bmbay' above 'Casp' and behind that, 'Prdgy'. Cheers were sounding behind him as Casper shook his hand enthusiastically. "So we have a rising new star in the arcade industry!" he beamed. Already he was scaring Omi; it wasn't often he found someone even more smiley than he was.

Omi was already red from all the attention. "Um, I was just lucky - "

He was interrupted by Casper. "Nonsense!" the unshakable boy laughed. "You could teach me a few things. Who know, maybe you've already taught Prodigy, ne?"

"He hasn't."

Omi turned to see dark blue eyes watching him calmly. Prodigy waved vaguely at the people who called out greetings and challenges to him, all the time focused to Omi's face.

"Didn't expect to see you here, Bombay," he said quietly.

Omi dredged up a grin. "Me neither."

"Have you eaten lunch?" When Omi shook his head, he asked, "Want to eat together?"

Omi wavered, then shrugged. He had a feeling if he stayed, Casper would force him to compete against Prodigy, and that was too close to reality for comfort. "Sure," he replied, and gave Casper an apologetic grin when he groaned.

After promising to come back some other time, the two made their way out of the arcade, exchanging pleasantries. They went into the food court, where each ordered something to eat. Then they sat and ate, this time in awkward silence, and finally Omi decided to make some small talk.

"So, why can't you best Casper in the shooting game?" Omi regretted the words once they came out of his mouth; it was like asking Prodigy why he wasn't any good.

The quiet boy didn't seem to notice, though, as he said, "I suppose it's because you use weapons that you need to aim. I don't."

"Oh. Uh, that makes sense," Omi nodded. "Um..." His brain scrabbled for something to say.

Nagi watched him, then decided to cut straight to the point. "Have you been talking to your team mates about that question you asked me?" he asked bluntly.

Omi gaped at him. "What? Why?"

"Because you've been acting weird. You were perfectly comfortable talking with me last time."

The Weiss boy averted his gaze.

Nagi sighed. He knew the Weiss team, and he was pretty sure who Omi had been talking to, to warrant such a reaction. "It was Abyssinian, wasn't it," he stated.

Omi's head whipped around to stare at him. "How'd you know?" he asked.

"Abyssinian hates us most of all. Don't let his views influence you."

"He's our leader!"

"And he doesn't -know- us. He thinks we're cold blooded murderers. And we aren't. We're just like you."

Omi fell silent. Then he said softly, "I'd -like- to believe you. I'd like to be your friend. Being your friend should be allowed, right, because that's not being -too- attached..." He looked at Nagi, as if waiting for his approval.

Nagi allowed himself a small smile. "And so would I. Let's start all over again, shall we?"

Omi looked puzzled.

"I am Nagi Naoe, student of Seishun Gakuen, ten minutes' walk from here. I am fifteen, and very good with computers, and often use the alias Prodigy."

A smile spread across that boyish face. "I'm Tsukiyono Omi, seventeen, studying at Rikkaidai. I'm great at computers, too, and call myself Bombay sometimes. Nice to meet you," he added.

"Nice to meet you too. So, about Kyoshiro and Kyo..."

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Reviews, onegai! And by the way, I won't be uploading for a very long time. Maybe a year or so. I need to concentrate on my studies, and then if I'm satisfied with my results, I'll go back to writing. So, this long chap is both an apology for taking to long to update since Chap 2 and also an apology for my not going to update.

And if you read PoT, FY or X/1999, please check out my other stories and review? Thanks!

[Ashen Skies][To touch the devil...]

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