A/N- Thanks for the reviews, y'all! You rock! Ammie
Title: I Got A Feeling (SEQUEL WILL BE CALLED 'ONCE AND AGAIN' look for it soon!)
Contents: Angst, mentions of rape, Slash
Chapter: 2/ 2
"But, isn't that a violation of trust?" Jeff asked, "Can't Kevin and let Shann do his own damn thing?"
"Jeff, it's not that simple. STD's can kill him if he got one!"
"Matt's right, Jeff. I think that we should take him to the doctor as soon as possible. For all we know, he's all clear. It's just a precautionary measure. It's for the best." Billy said, adding his own two cents.
Jeff g lared at the dark haired man sitting on the bed.
"Is that why you broke up with Shannon?" he asked, eager to set the blame, "If you wouldn't have broken up with him, he wouldn't have gotten together with Kevin in the first place!"
Billy looked up at him with anger in his eyes.
"Don't you dare pin this on me. It's his own damn fault for going with Kevin and it's Kevin's fault for picking Shannon up on the rebound. Shannon's just too fucking vulnerable."
Jeff stepped up to the brunette as Billy stood up to state his point.
"Don't you ever fucking say that about Shannon. EVER!" he yelled, gettin gin Billy's face.
"I can say whatever the hell I want. He's NOT YOUR PROPERTY, Jeff!"
"I never said he was." Jeff replied lowly.
"You fucking act like it and it drives you damn fucking nuts that I had him and you never stood a fucking chance. So you are blaming me. It's Shannon's damn fault for being stupid enough to go to that damn oaf after he FUCKING CHEATED on me and I caught him. It's HIS fault for giving into every fucking temptation that comes his way. And it's HIS damn fault that he sleeps with every fucking person who thinks he's cute without knowing them. It's all his damn fault, Jeff.
"And as much as you hate it, you can't change him. You can't protect him all of the time and you can't alter his way of thinking. I could do what every man Shannon's ever slept with has done. I could do it right now. I could go in there, tell him I'm sorry and that I was an idiot. Then tell him he looked cute today and end up fucking his brains out and leaving him again. And you know it."
Jeff was glaring at Kidman and was about to pounce and beat the living shit out of him, when a soft, quiet voice sounded around the room as though it was a shout:
"You'd really do that to me, Kid?"
Matt, Jeff and Billy all spun around to see that Shannon was standing about a foot inside the doorway. He was pale and shaking, ready to cry the tears that were threatening to fall down his face. None of them knew what to say.
"Well, i-if that;s how you feel, Kid...I'm...I gotta go."
Shannon shook his head in disbelief and left sadly. Billy's mouth was open in shock. Jeff looked at Matt, then at Billy and they all stood in silence for what felt like forever, but was actually closer to ten minutes. Jeff shook his head as well, taking out of the room after Shannon. He could hear the faint pattering of shoes on the stairs, so he got in the elevator. Kidman and Matt quickly rushed in and Jeff put his hand out to stop the elevator door from closing.
"Get out, Kidman."
"I care abotu Shannon, too. I caused this and I want to talk to him."
"Not right now you aren't. I'M going to find Shannon, and I'M going to talk to him. You might be able to talk to him later. But not now, not after what you did. Get out."
"No, Jeff, close the door."
Jeff shook his head and dashed from the elevator and down the stairs. Shannon was nowhere to be found and Kidman and Matt hadn't come down yet either. Maybe Matt had convinced Kidman to stay behind.
"Shit." Jeff cursed to himself as he looked around, seeing no sign of Shannon.
He ran out of the front door and climbed into his car. The good thing about having shows in North Carolina was the fact he could drive his own car. Also, there were not too many places that Shannon could have gone to that Jeff wouldn't know of. He strummed his hands on the wheel, think of where Shannon might have gone. He looked out of the sunroof, the sky was darkening as storm clouds threatened to fall.
"Where the Hell could he have gone? Not home...Not to Kevin's, he's here...."
He sighed again and pulled out of the parking lot when it hit him. Shannon always went to their old clubhouse on the cliff when he was upset. It was only about a twenty minute drive. Shannon was probably there by now. Dammit, Jeff's tank was low. He pulled over to a gas station and filled up the gas tank. When he finally got back on the road, it had started to rain. He searched the back seat for the plastic packaged blanket and when he found it, he placed it on the passenger seat.
Sure enough, Shannon was there when Jeff got to the cliff. He was sitting in the midst of the downpour, his knees to his chest, arms around them, his head resting on his kneecaps. Jeff gabbed the blanket and got out of his car. He called for Shannon, but he didn't move. Jeff made his way to where his friend was sitting.
"Shannon, come on, come get in my car. What are you doing?"
Shannon didn't even acknowledge Jeff's presense, let alone answer questions. Jeff took on of the blankets out of it's case despite the rain and wrapped it around his friends shivering body.
"Come one, Shann, you're gonna freeze out here."
Shannon moaned incoherantly, but he didn't get up. He just pulled hsi legs closer to himself.
"What's wrong, Shann?"
Shannon mumbled something that Jeff couldn't make out, but Jeff could see that Shannon's lips were fading colour in the cold, so he hoisted his friend up from his muddy place on the ground, leading him to the car. Shannon moaned feebley, but didn't protest when Jeff placed him in teh passengers seat. Jeff turned on the car, but kept it in park.
"Shann, what's wrong? Come on, talk to me. Why is it such a big deal? It's just Kidman. Talk to me, I'm your best friend."
"Are you? Are you, Jeff/" Shannon asked so quietly that Jeff almost didn't hear him.
"What? Of course I am, Shannon. What would make you think otherwise?"
Shannon didn't reply, he just leaned his head against the window and sighed quietly. Jeff leaned over to look Shannon in the eye, but Shannon didn't look him in his, he just looked out the window.
"Shannon, answer me."
"Shannon, answer me." Jeff repeated.
Shannon still didn't answer and it was really starting to aggrivate the younger Hardy. He grabbed Shannon by the shoulders again, yet softer than earlier as to not hurt the blonde. Shannon limply rolled his head to face Jeff, but he didn't asked "what?" like he normally did.
"Shannon, what did you mean by "am I?""
Shannon just slowly blinked at Jeff's question.
"Dammit, answer me!" Jeff yelled, frustrated, shoving Shannon back by the shoulders.
Shannon flew back and hit the door, seat and back of the truck harshly. He tensed and grimaced in pain, before pulling his arms around himself tightly and leaning forwards. jeff gasped.
"Jesus, Shannon, I'm so sorry. Are you alright? Shannon, look at me. Look at me."
He was sure that he heard a sob of anguish and pain, but he couldn't tell; Shannon got out of the truck so fast you'd think he was on fire. Jeff jumped as the door slammed. He opened it and grabbed the blanket Shannon had left before following him. He ran as fast as he could in the thick mud taht had formed to where Shannon was standing on the edge of the cliff. Shannon didn't look stable, he looked as if he could fall at any second. Jeff stood cautiously a few feet from his friend.
"Shannon, get back in my damn car."
Shannon grasped a cluster of his own blonde hair and pulled his head to look at the sky. Then..he laughed. It wasn't the laugh that Jeff knew, there was something different. Something..something that he couldn't place. Shannon continued to laugh, peering over the ledge of the cliff. Jeff gasped as Shannon dropped to his knees. He was so close to the edge that he could have fallen just then. Jeff took a few cautious steps toward his friend, careful not to get too close.
Shannon leaned his head against his knees and covered his face with his hands. Jeff finally made his way over to him.
"Shann, you alright?"
Shannon swung out to hit Jeff with his left hand and Jeff jumped back. Shannon sat up quickly, not caring that the rain got into his eyes as he looked at the sky.
Shannon jerked his head to look at Jeff, there was no emotion in his eyes; no feelings on his face. He laughed quietly before standing up and stepping to the ledge so his feet were half way off of it. Jeff felt his breath catch in his throat, but he couldn't move.
Suddenly, and before Jeff could do anything, Shannon began to tear away at his arms, leaving bleeding scratches all over them. Jeff got the courage to run over and he grabbed Shannon by the shoulders, pulling him nack. Almost instantly, Shannon limply fell against Jeff's chest. Jeff held him up and brought him back to the car.
Shannon must have passed out because he was unconcious by the time Jeff got him in the passengers seat. Jeff covered Shannon with the extra blanket and drove to the hospital.