The Magical Mokona Doll

By CLAMPraven

Disclaimer & Warnings:

Same things apply in all chapters.

Author's Notes:

My goodness…the last chapter, already! It seems as though this fic was short-lived, but I will remember it fondly, of course. ^-^ Thank you to all who reviewed; I appreciated it very much!

And now, I shall do a bit of obligatory ranting. ^-^;;

Tsubasa-RC’s fan base is only going to grow larger and larger with the coming of the second volume and beyond. Something tells me that this series will be one of epic proportions. And my meager contribution to its popularity was to be expected; I’ve always loved CLAMP. Their stories run so smoothly, able to grasp you in even when you know, in some oddly logical corner of your mind, that they may not have a highly substantial plot (I read the first chapter of XXXHolic and was immediately drawn in…even though the story didn’t even begin!). The ladies of CLAMP have such an interesting philosophy incorporated into every book, and their style and presentation are so highly original, that I have little doubt they’d be remembered as one of the most influential contributors to the art of manga. 

God, I still remember the days when I first saw Card Captor Sakura – I was 12, actually - and now it’s come to the point where I’m writing Tsubasa fanfiction with a passion! Wonderful, isn’t it? ^-^ My last CLAMP fic also happened to be CCS…and it wasn’t done particularly well, because when I’d written it, I had only a fraction of the knowledge and appreciation I have now for CLAMP. Ultimately, this one has a few OOC moments in it, too…but at least I knew what the ending would be…two chapters ahead! (And that’s an achievement! Usually, everything I do is a dash of spontaneity! -;;) So I’m proud of this work. Really, I am.

Now, why Fye and Kurogane? That’s the question I’ve been meaning to clear up. Why those two indeed? Three reasons off the top of my head: they are complete opposites, and we all know what that entails (Kurogane has light eyes and dark hair, Fye has dark eyes and light hair…it all works, people!); with Syaoran completely devoted to Sakura’s well-being, the majority of their time would be spent conversing with one another; and last but not least, Fye dubs Kuro-chan the cutest nicknames! Everything points to them being together…and even if CLAMP doesn’t render them a couple at the end of everything (a likely possibility, since the group is quite mischievous), I predict lots of teasers – lots and lots of obnoxious teasers, if I know their style. ^-^

But I do believe that, despite the fact that Fye and Kurogane are adorable together, there was something going on between Fye and Ashura-oh that prompted the former to leave Celes. Yes, that kind of something. Hence…this chapter. ^_^ (Yes, I’m done! Whoo!)

-

CHAPTER 7

Happiness

The girl who’d called out Kurogane’s name was quite young, Fye noted…no more than Syaoran’s age. She was well proportioned for her age, with slim hands and a graceful stride. Her long, violet tresses were neatly plaited into one thick braid, which was tied with a shining red ribbon, and her dark eyes were gentle and compassionate. She had a shapely mouth with full lips, and a rather cute nose, and her skin was pale and smooth. She held herself up with the dignity that a young lady should, which was not often seen in society in this day and age, and she had a charming smile. Though she was young, it was easy to tell that she would one day grow into a beautiful woman. 

Strangely, a group of tall bodyguards surrounded her, giving her the prestige of a wealthy social princess. But what caught Fye’s attention most strongly, however, was the fact that she wore a CLAMP campus official uniform…

“Kurogane, we’d been looking all over for you!” It was a strangely comical sight, seeing this young lady chide the much larger Kurogane so. “You ran off, and I had no idea where to find you! Do you purposely make me distraught all the time?”

She looked at him anxiously. “Do you have an explanation? Please tell me I was worried for good reason…” 

The huge man turned away, scowling, but refused to respond.

“Tomoyo-san, if I may suggest…” A tall, green-haired bodyguard hovering protectively over the girl leaned down to her, and whispered in concerned tones, “…I do believe that he ran off because he was embarrassed by the frilly costume you tried to force him into earlier…”

At this, Fye’s ears perked up…not because of the bizarre situation the words suggest, but because of the name of the lovely young girl. Wiping away his tears with a grimy sleeve, he cupped his chin with his hands, attempting to focus…banishing all the anguish and turmoil in his heart, if only for a split moment.

Tomoyo…? Where had he heard that name before…?

“SHUT UP!” Kurogane sprang up immediately upon hearing the young bodyguard, pointing an accusing finger at her, all the while blushing a raging red. “Who told you that you could talk for me, Souma? And you,” he glared ferociously at Tomoyo, who continued to smile amusedly, “It’s about damn time that you stopped making those ugly costumes anyway! Sakura gives you permission to use her as your dress-up doll because she actually manages to stand you, but making your hired work go through the same treatment is - ”

“…Cruel and unusual punishment?” Tomoyo injected innocently.

“E-Exactly!” Kurogane paused for a moment. “What the hell…! You mean you do that o-on purpose?”

She laughed gently. “Well, you do look adorable when you’re angry…”

“WHAT? That’s your pathetic reason? I ought to kill you!”

“Kurogane! How could you threaten Tomoyo-san that way?”

“Holy – ” Kurogane slapped himself in exasperation. “For the last damn time, Souma – ”

Suddenly, the missing link occurred to Fye. Shocked, he stared at the group as the argument ensued, but mostly at the ever-composed young girl. “Sakura…? Kurogane had mentioned Sakura’s name. Syaoran had said that Sakura’s friend was named Tomoyo…and attends CLAMP school! Then surely, this must be the same person!”

With a start, he realized that said person was now gazing fixedly on him, with a surprised expression. Souma and Kurogane appeared to have stopped bickering also, having heard him speak. He blinked, and rose out of his sitting awkwardly.

“I’m sorry…I’d spoken too loudly.” He smiled pathetically, his eyes still bloodshot and his stance vulnerable, and bowed in apology. “I’m interfering. I’ll leave you all alone…”

“No…please, wait.”

It was Tomoyo who decided to approach him. Grabbing his sleeve, she stopped him from leaving. With a worried expression, she retrieved a handkerchief from her pocket and offered it to him, her eyes distressed. “We should be apologizing, not you! Are you all right? What’s your name…?” She frowned, perplexed. “And…how do you know Syaoran and Sakura…?”

-

Moments later, he was seated upon the bench again, but with Tomoyo and Souma to one side of him and Kurogane to another. Tomoyo had dismissed the rest of her bodyguards, allowing them all to wait for her at her limousine. She had gladly volunteered to stay by Fye’s side, even though it was late in the night, to make sure he was no longer upset. Souma, her benevolent and devoted bodyguard, had also gladly remained at her side through this, but Kurogane…

“Why the hell do I have to stay here in the cold with this guy?” Kurogane barked indignantly at Tomoyo, as Fye returned her handkerchief with moist fingertips. “It’s none of my business what his problem is!”

The girl gazed at him kindly, but there was a silent undertone behind her seemingly calm expression. “Now, now, Kurogane! You have to stay, because you happened to be near him when I arrived; therefore, I have no idea whether it was you who made him cry. And if you did, then you are not going anywhere until this matter is resolved.”

“What? I sure as hell did NOT make this idiot cry!”

“Kurogane!” Souma hissed dangerously. “There you go again!” She turned to Fye with an embarrassed look, all the while glaring out of the corners of her eyes at Kurogane, who glared back stubbornly.  “I apologize for his behavior, sir. He’s not the most considerate person you’ll ever meet.”

Fye smiled, and shook his head. “It’s quite all right. I’m sure he doesn’t mean it.”

Beside him, Kurogane snorted. “Sure, I didn’t.”

“Kurogane…!”

“Never mind the two of them…they bicker constantly; there’s no help for them.” Tomoyo sighed heavily in resignation. “Usually, I think that it’s quite amusing, since it’s never very serious…but right now, it does not fit the occasion. You seem to be troubled. Is there something that you’d like to say?”

Startled, Fye instinctively shivered. Truly, there was something haunting him, unseen and devastating. Words could not describe how much he wanted to be rid of them. And yet…

“No…there’s nothing.”

But he could not possibly say what he wished to say, could not confide in the compassionate trio. As much as he wished he could, he was not brave enough; he’d never been bold enough to relinquish his troubles to the wind, to share his burden with others. It was not in his nature. He closed his eyes, trying to banish his demons once again, trying his very hardest to make them go away on his own…

There was a moment of silence, wherein Fye hear most significantly the rapid beating of his own heart. Deep inside, he prayed that none of them would pity him, would see that something was terribly wrong with him. Then…

“You’d better leave.” It was Kurogane’s voice, and Fye shuddered. Mokona could’ve done a better job of choosing a true love for him…that was for certain…

“Yes, I should…shouldn’t I?”

“…Not you, you idiot.”

Startled, Fye stared up at Kurogane, who gestured to Tomoyo and Souma. “I asked those two to leave. Clearly, you’re not going to talk about anything in front of a group, even if it is a closely knit one…” He glared at Fye darkly, “…So if we’re ever going to get a confession out of you, you’re going to have to talk directly to me.”

“Ah…b-but…” Fye stuttered, at a loss for words.

“That’s not a bad idea!” Tomoyo beamed. “Who knew that Kurogane would volunteer himself for this? And while the two of you talk, I can go to the fountain! Sakura and Syaoran said that they were going to meet there tonight, to look at the moon, if nothing else – as if those two need an excuse to look cute together! So I can go videotape them!”

“But…but…!”

“That is true…I do have your video camera,” Souma held up a small black bag, approximately the size of the camera. She still looked dubious, however. “But Kurogane…are you sure he wouldn’t scare him silent?”

“Nonsense. Kurogane is more sensitive than he seems,” Tomoyo reassured her. She turned to Fye with a brilliant smile. “Then, it’s decided! We’ll go off and leave you two alone, so you can say whatever you feel like without being uncomfortable. We’ll be back in a while, so by the time we return, I expect considerable progress!”

With a strong wave and a cheerful “Good luck!”, she bounded off in the direction of the fountain with tall Souma in tow, leaving Fye utterly speechless.

How was he to say anything with the stoic Kurogane, anyhow?

“Thank you.” Fye turned back to him, with a hesitant smile on his face. “B-but why did you volunteer to stay with me? I thought you didn’t want to – ”

“Well, truth be told, Tomoyo’s a cute girl, and really polite; I like her well enough, but she has some raving psychotic tendencies whenever she makes those costumes of hers.” Kurogane rolled his eyes. “Kids…and Souma’s just plain disagreeable. Anytime that I get to spend away from them whenever they’re hyper is a goddamned miracle.”

Fye couldn’t help but chuckle at this. “You…really are fond of them, though.”

Raising an eyebrow, the larger man grunted, and turned away. “For an asshole with a stupid smile on his face all the time…you’re still more perceptive than the average person.” He glared down at the ground. “But I guess I’d have to expect that, since you’re not the average person.”

“Pardon…?”

“It was part of the reason why I wanted to hear you speak more. At first, I didn’t recognize you…but the more I listened to you chatter, the more familiar your voice seemed, and the more certain I was that I’d heard your voice before.”

Gazing at him from an angle, there seemed to be a different light in his shapely eyes, something more curious and contemplative that Fye had failed to notice before. Were those pessimistic, somber eyes always capable of this…?      

“Then I realized it. Your voice…I’d heard it once in the animated feature ‘Hinata’, that came out about half a year ago. You used to work for the Clover Project…didn’t you?”

-

Caught off guard, Fye stared at Kurogane in utter disbelief. During the long months on the streets, those days of loneliness and constant struggle just to survive, no one else had recognized him for this before. And yet this irritable man, whom he knew only impartially and who didn’t seem to care at all about his predicament, remembered him. How was it possible…?

The emotions from his past could not be barred forever…Fye knew this, even though he was intent on trying nonetheless. But with this person’s words, words only meant as a tool for casual conversation, the feelings of his heart that had been buried alive resurged, invading his mind and heart.

“Hinata”. Everything that had happened during the course of its production returned to him now with the same depth and intensity, even in his memories. They were vivid triumphs, fears, and degradations…every moment captured in his mind in radiant ardor.

He knew that he could never let go.

“Yes…I did work for Clover,” he whispered, allowing the repressed memories to resurface without meaningless denial. His voice was hoarse and indecisive, as though he was trying to remind himself of something forced underneath his silly smile. “Approximately six months ago, maybe more…I worked for Clover.”

Kurogane narrowed his eyes. “So it’s true. My ears didn’t deceive me. You played a role in ‘Hinata’ when the movie was released…not that I’d normally watch that kind of movie,” he added quickly, “but Souma wanted to see it, so Tomoyo and I went with her. Not a lot of people knew about that movie, since the Clover Project was this tiny studio in the middle of nowhere that could only pay for minimal advertising. The plot was all fluff and nonsense, but you were one of the voice actors…that I know for sure.”

“Fluff and nonsense…is that what you thought of it?” Fye chuckled quietly, his eyes somewhat sad. “Yes…a lot of other people did, too.”

“Why? What’s your problem?”

“The voice acting part that I had was only had in fun…I don’t suppose you read the credits – not that people do that nowadays – but I…”

He sighed heavily.

“I directed that movie.”

“What the hell? Y-You’re not serious…!” Kurogane’s eyes bulged out in disbelief, his jaw flapping. “YOU directed that thing…?”

Fye laughed at the amusing reaction. Tomoyo was right…seeing him panic was a surprisingly funny sight. “Yeah…it was my last work. I didn’t like it very much myself…seeing it, that is. I’d only seen it once after it was released in theaters, and I cried so much that time, I felt sick to my stomach.”

“Hell…it wasn’t that sad!” Kurogane exclaimed.

“No, the storyline itself was considered somewhat unrealistic, so it ended up being less miserable than it was intended to be. But the material came from my experiences. Upon seeing that movie in its completed form, everything that happened before, everything that it was based upon, came back to me, and I cried. I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore, I pitied myself so much.”

Fye glanced at Kurogane with gentle eyes. “You remember what ‘Hinata’ was about, don’t you? A young girl by the movie’s name, who was born into a rich family, fell in love with a street artist named Asou Shirou. She became a model for his paintings, and his inspiration; they talked often every day, even though her parents disapproved, and she learned that Shirou was an intelligent and considerate person. Because Shirou could not sell his paintings, however, he eventually resorted to stealing, which got him into a lot of trouble; when he was discovered to be a criminal, he and Hinata elope, traveling on a train and by sea to find a place where they could start anew. Most of the movie involved the two lovers traveling, pursued by the police, and Hinata seeing the world outside of her sheltered lifestyle.

“It was a story of love, and I was unaccustomed to writing stories of love…because I’d never fallen in love before. I had no idea what kind of material would be realistic. But back when I’d begun writing the script, I was truly in love, for the first time, with a man who also worked at the Clover Project. I was utterly happy.

“That was why, at the beginning, the movie was supposed to have a happy ending. Hinata and Shirou would, eventually, be accepted by the world and live happily together.

“Ashura was an animator at Clover; he was foreign, having lived most of his life in India. He was tall, dashing…incredibly handsome, with a gentle face. He had a strong work ethic, and was serious most of the time; he didn’t smile a lot, now that I think about it…”

“Then how the hell did he get stuck with you?” Kurogane wondered out loud.

Fye laughed. “I’m more serious than I look…and besides, it wasn’t as though we had no common interests. He and I both put our every effort into making Clover a success, because we were both with the project since the beginning. We were part of the original team that invented the concept…an animation studio that would focus on human relationships. As you probably noticed, all the films that were ever created by the Clover Project had special motifs, and common styles of art.”

Scratching his chin, Kurogane nodded, acknowledging this. “Yeah…I always kind of wondered about that. Before ‘Hinata’, Clover came out with another film named ‘Hisui’, about a journalist who fell in love with a mental patient when he had to do an article on human psychology. I’d watched a bit of that one, when Souma bought it. There was a lot of empty space and silence within the film, and there were these constant uses of shadows. There was scarcely any dialogue. The film was short, but despite all the emptiness within it, it used its time well and it was particularly effective. ‘Hinata’, too, was like that.”

“All of the films by Clover strive to convey as much emotion as they can using only as many words as necessary,” Fye explained. “We believed that words are easily misinterpreted, and do not convey emotions the best way; most of the time, it’s not so much as what a person says as what they don’t say that haunts the audience’s mind. Without the distraction of words, people are better able to concentrate on the character’s faces, their physical interaction…perhaps sensing their awkwardness or hesitation.

“In any case, I directed most of the films by the Clover Project…not ‘Hisui’, though, because I had no idea how to write a love film that deep back then. Before Clover, I had a hard time finding a job, but then after the project began, I was employed privately. The films created by that studio had enjoyed moderate success amongst the thespian communities, so we made enough money to keep ourselves supported. 

“I worked often with Ashura when I was employed by Clover, because his character designs for my ideas seemed to bring out something that others couldn’t. I myself don’t draw very well.” Fye giggled embarrassedly. “All the other animators couldn’t understand my ideas for my characters very well. When I asked for a design for ‘Hinata’, none of them could capture the idea of the innocent little girl. It caught me by surprise that Ashura, who had just begun his job there and was still somewhat hesitant about the studio’s methods, could connect with my ideas in such a way that he created the perfect character design for Hinata, the one used in the movie…with large, wondrous eyes and short hair, always clutching her teddy bear.

“He seemed to understand me. It was hard to find help like him. During the time when I was still concocting the plot – back then, ‘Hinata’ was supposed to be a dramatic horror - he often visited me in my office and contributed his own ideas whenever they could help. I began to like him then; some of my co-workers thought that he was overly serious and commanding – they gave him the name ‘Ashura-oh’ because of how arrogant he was sometimes – but he seemed to act differently towards me than he did towards others. Around me, he was always warm and friendly. It was a drastic difference, and whenever I saw him, I felt a foreign and unusual sensation within my heart…

“In due time, I found out why. When I finally finished the first draft of the ‘Hinata’ plot and was about to send it in to the editor, Ashura came to my office and said the words that I thought he’d never say. He told me that he loved me. And somehow, we came to kiss. I gave into my feelings…feelings of love I never knew would grow so strong, so fast.

“That day, I tore up the original ‘Hinata’ plot, and rewrote it…as a romance. Certainly, it took a long time to redo, but…I couldn’t write a thriller, in that state of mind. I had just found something undeniably wonderful. I hadn’t the heart to write about anything else…

“For some reason, though, Ashura didn’t like the genre change. He…he’d come into my office, and he’d look at the script as I wrote it. And he’d offer his advice, as usual, but whenever he saw the character sketches of Hinata and Shirou together, as a couple, he’d frown…and he’d ask me to change the ending.

“ ‘Hinata doesn’t even know what kind of person Shirou is. Being able to trust him that way…she is not facing the realities of life. It would not be true love...just Hinata’s one-sided belief that everything would be okay.’ That was what he told me. ‘Change the ending, Fye…such a couple cannot remain happy together.’

“And I’d always be puzzled as to why he said these things. He and I were together, and clearly, he was as happy as I was. So why was he so much against the happy ending of the movie? It reflected our relationship in more than one way. Why…why doesn’t he accept that Hinata and Shirou would be okay?

“We worked on the movie for months on end. There was hardly enough time to be together for Ashura and me, because his department needed him to work on the character designs and animation, and I needed to finalize the production. We were separate most of the time, but whenever we did come together, he would ask about the plot.

“ ‘Are you going to change the ending?’ He always asked me this, and whenever I shook my head and said I didn’t, his face would grow sad, and he would smile and say to me, ‘You’re such an idealistic person, Fye…and I wish I had your optimism.’

‘Ashura told me, towards the end of the production, that he was going to move back to India for a short while after the movie was finished, to see his family. His family was poor, he’d said, and they would be glad to see that he could help support them, if only minimally. I sympathized with him, and I gave him some of my own money, and because I trusted him so, I gave him access to my bank account, as well. He appeared reluctant to take these gifts at first, but I eventually convinced him that it was okay.

“And while preparations were being made for Ashura’s trip, everyone at Clover worked hard, and we had almost completed the movie when the infamous fire occurred.”

“A fire?” Kurogane queried, his voice surprisingly quiet

Fye nodded. For a moment, it seemed as though a shadow of bitterness passed over his face, a ghost of such profound regret and hatred that it scared Kurogane. 

“That’s right. A fire. The entire studio burned down during the night; what remained of the foundations of the building was cleared out eventually. Most of ‘Hinata’ was saved…

“…Except the ending.

“When the fire was put out, and it was safe to examine the ruins, everyone who worked in the studio helped scavenge for the lost ending of ‘Hinata’. We’d put a lot of effort into the final segment, making sure it was as powerful and full of significance as we could possibly achieve. We’d spent hours brainstorming the best possible way to end ‘Hinata’, and we refused to accept the fact that all the production notes, all the cels and illustrations had been burned to ash and insignificance.

“But truly, it was gone, everything that we’d done for the ending save one picture. It was a painting that I’d done in my spare time, a painting of Hinata and Shirou together at the very end. I’d envisioned the scene for a while, and although it was eventually changed, the painting reflected the very pose they were in, the very expressions on their faces.

“It was ripped in half…right between Hinata and Shirou’s tight embrace. The police tried to gather fingerprints from that painting, but we were informed that the person had been wearing gloves when he’d ripped it apart, and it was not possible. Everything about the crime was flawless, and there was no evidence at all.

“All the same, when I looked at the painting, something struck me,” Fye whispered. A single tear rolled down his cheek, and dribbled onto the warm scarf that Hideki had lent him earlier. He shut his eyes tightly, but all the same, his moist eyes brimmed with more such tears, tainting his usually joyous expression. “It-it was too much like something that he would do.

“So I went home immediately after I saw it, fearing the worst. In my apartment, where Ashura and I spent countless nights together, I found a note in his unruly scrawl.

“He’d taken everything. Not just from my meager account, but from the Clover Project’s. He’d stolen all of Clover’s funds, and all of mine as well. In the note, he’d explained it all. He didn’t mean to rob from me, but when I gave him my account number, it said…well, what else would he have done…? He felt the need to teach me a lesson, a harsh one but one that he felt was necessary. Love that was based on belief, based on trust…”

Fye shook his head fiercely, and opened his eyes to the chilly air, allowing the streams to flow down his face. Shivers ran through his entire body, recounting the horror he’d felt when he read Ashura’s confession with absolute clarity.

He needed to say this, he screamed inside his mind as he gritted his teeth.

“That kind of love, that he and I had…that Hinata and Shirou had…it isn’t real…! It would’ve never fulfilled Ashura, and he wanted me to know that. He ripped apart the painting…he set fire to Clover…because he wanted me to know. He wanted me to learn this…right before he left for his country.

“No one could ever catch him. He’d planned his scheme very well. I doubt the police ever caught him…after all, I never showed his note to anyone. I could never betray such a man.

“I loved only an image of him…the kind, gentle Ashura who could do no wrong, the Ashura I wanted to see…but he truly loved me, more than I could say...for my weaknesses as well. He needed to tell me this. He did what he did to me, so that if I ever got a chance to love again, I wouldn’t get hurt. That’s how much he loved me.”

Kurogane glared at him in disbelief and rage. There was something in his eyes that Fye couldn’t explain. Did he actually care…?

“…But he…hurt you.”

“All the same…he meant well…” Fye tried to laugh, but couldn’t succeed. Instead, what came out was a pathetic choking sound, and he turned away in grief, unable to look the other man in the eye. “It w-was for my own good, and – ”

“…So that you wouldn’t get hurt ever again,” Kurogane finished, his quiet voice concealing the infuriation he felt in his heart. “But that bastard forgot one thing. In order to protect you from hurt, he hurt you himself. Would you…just for one goddamned second…”

With his strong hands, he grabbed Fye’s frail shoulders, forcing their eyes to meet.

“…Look at me?”

Fye tried to twist himself away from the forceful grasp, but the man was too strong. Through misty, bloodshot eyes, he could hardly see the outlines of Kurogane’s features, his demonic eyes and his irritated scowl…but it wasn’t because of his vision, he soon realized.

It was because they weren’t there. They were replaced by an expression so full of anxiety and mortification that made Fye’s breath catch in his throat.

“Why the hell do you pity that guy? After what he did to you, why do you give him an excuse for something that was probably the most spontaneous and ignorant thing I’d ever heard done in my entire life?” His voice was incredulous…it almost sounded insulting. “How can you be this pathetic?”

“Because belief is more important than love…!”

With a swift yank, Fye writhed away from an awestruck Kurogane’s clutches, and collapsed onto the bench, facing away. He was certain he’d rather die than look into those hauntingly beautiful eyes again.

“Belief is more important than love,” he sobbed through his hands, his voice barely audible, as the full impact of what he’d said sank in. “If…If I believe in Ashura’s love for me…it doesn’t matter if it isn’t true. It d-doesn’t matter…it doesn’t…so long as I believe. So long as I c-convince myself that it is him I’ll always love.”

And as he said it, he wondered why he said it with such sincerity.

Unknowingly…subconsciously…

…Had he known Yuuko was right all along, and tried to suppress it?

Was it all in his mind? That Ashura loved him…was it a last measure of desperation? Did he fool himself into thinking it, and shut himself inside the safe haven that was but an illusion?

Yuuko…was right.

Belief was more important than love.

His love…with Ashura…the love between the two leads of “Hinata”…they’d both been based on belief: his belief…only his belief, that everything would be all right. Even when he was betrayed, he believed. Even when he was smiling through bitter tears, he believed. His belief was so blind that…

…That…

…It wasn’t true love…either.

And just when he, wracked with the torment of this realization, was about to scream in agony…

…Kurogane opened his mouth, and quietly said something that made Fye open up his eyes in pure wonder and amazement.

“That may be true. Belief is probably more important than love. But happiness…”

Turning around, Fye gazed at him in unparalleled awe. Something had happened to the crude, unflattering man who’d stood beside him just a moment ago. He was completely transformed…surrounded by a radiant light, a hope that Fye had thought was dead inside of his frigid heart.

“…Happiness is more important than anything.” Stepping forward, he reached out his long, calloused fingers, touching the other’s cheek with surprising gentleness. “And if you believe something, and it renders you unhappy…there is no excuse for not making amends for what you’d done.”

-

“Kurogane! Fye-san!”

Turning his head, Fye recognized the familiar shape of Tomoyo through his teary eyes, as she ran up towards them, her video camera in tow. Behind her was Souma, jogging at brisk pace, and struggling to catch up with the energetic younger girl. And following the two of them was Sakura and Syaoran, hand in hand, as adorable a couple as they’d ever been together…trailing behind at a more leisurely pace.

Instinctively, Kurogane withdrew his hand and tucked it into a pocket, looking somewhat grumpy as he did so. Wiping his eyes, Fye managed a genuine smile at Tomoyo, who – upon running up and closely inspecting the red rims of his large eyes - frowned with disapproval.

“Kurogane! Did you make Fye-san cry?” She scolded critically.

“What the hell? I told you already! Why the hell would I make this idiot cry?” Kurogane yelled defensively, returning quite naturally to his normal voice level. “He cried on his own, the stupid wimp!”

Souma shook her head, and sighed exasperatedly. “Just as I thought. Fye-san, don’t take offense to this insensitive jerk…”

“None taken, I assure you,” Fye laughed gently.

“Who’s an insensitive – !!”

“I think she means you,” Tomoyo’s grin widened, as Kurogane flared up.

“STOP stating the friggin OBVIOUS!!”

“Hanyaan…” Sakura sweatdropped embarrassedly as she approached the commotion. “Tomoyo…Kurogane…!”

Syaoran greeted Fye hesitantly. “Fye-san…it’s good to see you again. But what happened? You look like you’ve been crying heavily…are you sure you’re all right?”

“I’ll be okay.”

Fye nodded with conviction in his eyes. He then turned away, gazing in silent admiration at Kurogane, who was currently engaging in a verbal conflict with Tomoyo…and not a particularly sophisticated one, either.

“If you hurt Fye-san, I’ll make you wear the clown costume!”

“Shit, Tomoyo! For the last damn time, I did NOT make him cry!!”

“Although…I do also have that ballerina costume…”

“TOMOYO – ! Don’t give me that! I do NOT need to hear about your cosplay closet of doom, damn it!”

Was it true love…?

Underneath his gruff and uninviting exterior, he’d found a gentle heart inside Kurogane…Fye knew that he would never forget the kindness shown to him that night. As Fye smiled upon him secretly, taking in the tall man’s every feature, memorizing his condescending voice and his sharp eyes, he also knew that he might never see this person again.

How did Kurogane know exactly what to say to him, just when his anguish and misery threatened to consume him? How did he know…?

“Happiness is more important than anything.”

That was what he’d said.

No matter what, you cannot have love without belief. But why would anyone believe if it doesn’t bring him or her happiness…? Why would the world go round, if not to shine the sun on the multitude of life that inhabits this lonely little planet, so that people can smile and go on dreaming?

Fye had been so busy believing that he didn’t realize that it wasn’t helping him. But he realized this now. Somehow, he knew…all thanks to loud, angry Kurogane.

Happiness…

What would make him happy…?

That was all that mattered in the world.

“Kurogane,” he called out softly. Upon seeing that Kurogane was still embroiled in his heated debate with Tomoyo, he raised his voice, more confidently this time. “Kurogane.”

“Huh?” The person in question turned around. “What is it?”

Beaming, Fye tilted his head, resting his chin on one shoulder. His cheeks were tinted rosy red, as he approached Kurogane shyly. All around him, the others had ceased their infantile chatter, and their eyes were drawn magnetically to the two individuals, now standing face-to-face, eye-to-eye.

And Fye kissed him.

Softly, their lips caressed, in a fantastic moment when even the birdsong paused; Kurogane couldn’t have been any more surprised, but he reciprocated the kiss, drawing Fye closer to him with his burly arms, running his fingers through the pale locks of hair. Meanwhile, Syaoran and Sakura’s jaws dropped simultaneously, while Souma simply gaped, her eyes fixated upon the scene; Tomoyo simply smiled, relishing the quiet exchange.

And when the two parted, slightly breathless, Fye’s face was a flushed red, but his intense eyes were opened wide, as though they’d previously been weary and disconnected with reality. His usually dreamlike, goofy expression was gone now, replaced by a look that said he was wholly awake, having just experienced something incredible.

“So…this is true love,” he murmured happily, clinging onto Kurogane, who hugged him back numbly. “This is…happiness.”

Impressed but all the same confused, Kurogane fixed him with a questioning look. “What…did you do that for…?”

Fye laughed.

“It’s because I love you. Being together makes me feel happy. It doesn’t matter now, what happened in the past. I feel like looking forward, to see where my steps are leading me. And I will do what is right for myself…starting today, starting with you, Kuro-chan.”

Kurogane’s eyes bulged out in indignant horror. Beside him, Tomoyo stifled her stream of giggles with her palm.

“KURO-CHAN?? What the hell kind of a nickname is THAT?”

-

It was a blustery night…a night of the hustle and bustle of the streets, for it was the night of the full moon, a rare and wondrous event. The dingy streets were filled with smoke and an all-consuming racket of people and their loud problems.

But in Tsubasa Park, all is right in the world.

Never again forget, as Fye shall never forget, that your happiness overrides all. It’s even more powerful…than belief.