Screaming In Silence

I felt as if I were living in a dream. No, not a dream, a nightmare. My body was no longer my own, controlled now by an alien posing as a goddess. I was a slave in the most complete manner imaginable.

I was called a Child of the Gods.

I – we – she had all the physical luxuries of royalty, but I gave her no peace. I felt sick, violated, and I screamed day and night. I screamed at her for what she had done to me. I screamed at the universe for handing me this fate. There were times when I lost my grip on reason and screamed at Daniel, my dear Daniel, for not saving me. But there was nothing he could have done.

I had only one comfort: my Daniel was looking for me. Just as I will always belong to him, so will he always belong to me. Our love burns brighter than any sun.

I could only stand by helplessly as Amaunet toyed with the emotions of powerful System Lords. I was in agony, tortured by guilt, for I had given myself to Daniel, and Daniel alone.

Amaunet, I soon discovered, was even more adept at seduction than Hathor.

I cannot describe how I felt when I found I was carrying Apophis's child. I was disgusted. I wanted to die. I wanted to rip the demon baby from my own womb.

But I also rejoiced. The child within me was Harcesis, and as such would have all the knowledge of the Goa'uld. If I could deliver him to Daniel and his friends, they might be able to use that knowledge to defeat the false gods. I grew to love the boy. He was, after all, my son. I could only wish he was Daniel's as well.

Daniel, come find me, please! Every moment you are not with me is agony. I am dying, my Daniel.

I will not last much longer.