As strange as it sounds, yes, I was inspired by many Busted songs, but also, erm… “Dynamite Rave” by Naoki, “Boukensha-tachi” by Do As Infinity and…

erm…

“Do The Funky Gibbon” by the Goodies.

          *hides in shame*

          Theme song – “Crashed the Wedding” – Busted [download the video for it – it’s hysterical!]

Crashed the Wedding

Part 1 of 2

            “I do.”

          They were the most monumental words he’d ever said in his life, and, as he looked around the church at the myriad of faces in the pews, their stunned eyes trained on him, he realised that if this didn’t work out, he was in for a major crap-storm once he set foot outside.

          Because as the silence buzzed in his ears, so did the priest’s last words.

          “And should any person here present have reason to object to this union, may they speak now, or forever hold their peace.”

          And from the look on Misty’s face, whether or not he lived to see daylight again was no longer an option. The only light he’d see again would be the burning flames of hell ready to roast his ass back to Mickey D’s.

          Almost stunned, as though he’d never expected anyone to break up what the media had called the ‘fated whirlwind’, the priest’s jaw worked soundlessly for a moment, trying to work out who the dark-haired man standing at the back was, amber eyes almost burning in the dim church lights. “And… and do you have a reason for that?” he stammered, aware of the flashing media bulbs probably destroying each mural on the old walls.

          Ash walked forward, casually terrified, and forced a slow, lazy grin over his lips. “Of course I have a reason,” he said, risking a glance to her taut countenance and smiled. “Cuz she’s my girl.”

I'm so rushed off my feet
Looking for Gordon Street
So much I need to say
I'm sorry that it's on her wedding day

          He heard the crowd gasp as they recognised the Pokémon Master, and heard them wondering what the hell he was doing here. He watched Rudy’s fists clench and unclench, as though debating whether to march right up the aisle and beat him to within an inch of his life, and, in all honesty, Ash admired his restraint. He watched her sisters, all decked out in silk pastel gowns that matched their hair-colour, murmur in shocked whispers between themselves, feeling the drafts of the old Cerulean church trail their icy fingers up his spine; he shivered despite the warm shirt he wore. He almost didn’t dare chance a look at her again, the way her eyes burned with anger, made her look so animated in the tight-fitting fluffy flouncy dress that had struck him the minute he’d walked into the church as being so unlike her, and yet still made her look beautiful at the same time. Though, he reflected, she could walk around wearing nothing but a tea cosy and a bin-liner and he would still lose his breath. “Um,” he said, to break the silence as his voice seemed to rise a pitch, “Can I talk to you for a second, please?”

            She didn’t waste a blink. “No.” was her simple reply. Expecting that, he sighed, casting his eyes around the church to find something to fix his eyes upon rather than her, he knew she’d steal his breath if he did it again.

          “I just… please, I really have something I need to say to you. It’ll take ten minutes, no more.”

            “I said ‘No’, Ash, and I meant it.” This time, Rudy had taken her hand in his, glowering dangerously.

          “Exactly what do you want to say to my fiancée,” Rudy said, the word fiancée biting Ash, “that you can’t say in front of the people here?” Biting back about a million things he wanted to say to Rudy, of all people, he tried to put on a polite front.

          “Just some things that a best friend would like to say to his best friend before she gets married, is all. It’ll only take ten minutes tops, probably not even that.” He saw Misty fold her arms as though about ready to refuse, he saw Rudy’s expression change from angry to puzzled. “Rudy, I-“ he paused, wondering if what he was about to say was a little bit too much of a white lie. “I’m not trying to stop your wedding, man. Only you guys can do that.” Almost reassured, Rudy seemed to lose the ‘I want you dead’ look on his face and looked to Misty, an expectant look on his face. Ash found it hard to miss the helpless look on her face that flickered briefly, followed by a fired glare that, not so long ago, he knew was either a prelude to violence or something more heated.

 
Cos she's mine

          He remembered how they’d broken up. They’d been watching TV, flicking through a holiday brochure when the honeymoon section came up. Ash had felt awkward; tried to flick through the section quickly to the next destination but she had caught his wrist and asked to look at the rest of the resorts. He’d responded – trying to be cheeky - with ‘why? We aren’t getting married,’ and whether she’d taken it the wrong way or the awkwardness had betrayed his tone, he still wasn’t sure, but in a few minutes, both were screaming at each other, her at him for being a commitment-phobe, him at her for suffocating him. Then a few minutes after that, he’d said something that he couldn’t quite remember, except he knew it had hurt her, as she just stopped, had turned on her heel and gone to their room, grabbed a bunch of her things, shoving them into the closest thing to hand – her old red backpack – and walked out, making sure to leave her key on the side table. He’d stood there, stunned, statuesque as the click of the door – she hadn’t even slammed it – echoed through the apartment, trying to ignore the empty feeling that had crept into his stomach as she’d left, where his throat was thickening around his breathing, the silence rolling around as he caught a glassy sight of Pikachu’s ear as she hid behind a door, scared by the racket.

It was a week that had passed until he got up the nerve to call her – an excruciatingly lonely week, where he’d had to sleep on the couch, not wanting to be alone with so much space around him, staying near the TV to distract him. Brock had been worried about him, about them; Ash had brushed it off as though it was just a minor spat, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that it was something so much worse. And when he’d finally built up his nerve and called the Gym, and Violet answered the phone with Daisy glaring in the background, and Violet, forcibly polite, asked him to return Misty’s things, that she wasn’t home, had gone away, and would he please not call again except on official business, and hung up, he felt the need to cry.

          And now, not even a year later, she was up the aisle with someone else, getting married, and nobody had ever told him, nobody had ever told him anything about her until a week before when, asking Brock what he was doing, the Breeder had shuffled his feet, looking awkwardly downward, and mumbled the fact that not only was he going to Misty’s wedding, but he was giving her away. And Ash didn’t know what hurt more. The fact she was with someone else, the fact she was marrying someone else, or the fact that not even his best friends had told him. And then last night, after drinking in a bar with Tracey, who was trying his best to play mediator, and having slightly too much to drink, he’d made his mind up as he stumbled home alone, as wholly stupid and idiotic as it sounded, he would not let this pass him by. It was not in his nature to quit, and besides, hadn’t he always beaten exceptionally stupid odds?

And I'm glad I crashed the wedding
It's better than regretting
I could have been a loser kid
Who ran away and hid

But it's the best thing that I ever did

          “What the hell do you think you’re playing at? Walking in here like that?” she spat the minute the door was closed on the tiny side-chapel the priest had ushered them into. He’d felt the burning eyes of everyone on the chapel as he’d meekly made his way down the aisle and through a passage, felt the way Rudy had watched each move, and all of a sudden, he was scared as she didn’t have a bouquet to take care of, having left that with Lily.

          “I… um… to… talk?” he stammered foolishly, suddenly realising how much her proximity was suddenly affecting him, trying to calm the stupid schoolboy blush that had risen in his cheeks, glancing at her bare ring-finger and wishing that he would be the one to decorate it, not Rudy, not any other guy. Jealousy surged for a moment and was gone with the draft. “I just… why didn’t you tell me you were getting married? We were best friends…”

          She rolled her eyes. “And we were also dating and you screwed it up by being a jackass. And considering one of the last things you said to me, why would I want you at my wedding?” About to counter with ‘why wouldn’t you?’, he stopped.

          “I just…” he began, then paused again, as though the draft had taken away his words, feeling frustrated with himself for the stupid idea, with her for not being as his unrealistic plan had panned itself out. “You just… left. You didn’t even give me a chance to apologise.”

          “Because I didn’t want them,” she replied, almost lightning fast. “Why would I? Give you another license to act like a jerk and get away with it?”

          Defensiveness whipped through his spine and he shot back, “Me act like a jerk? You’re the one who called me out because I didn’t want to get married! Now a year later you’re with some other guy getting married? And you didn’t even let me know!”

          “Why should I have let you know?! I knew you’d be stupid enough to pull a stunt like this – that’s why!”

          Angry, he gave a contemptuous snort. “Stupid? Yeah, because you’ve done so many smart things in your life, haven’t you?” He was ready to tick them off on his fingers before she cut him off abruptly.

            “At least I’ve never tried to break up someone’s wedding!”

          “I’m not breaking up your wedding,” he replied. “You’re the only person in this room who can do that.”

          She turned on her heel. “You’re absolutely right. So if you’ll excuse me-“ she made to leave.

          She was impossible.

          It was something that addicted him to her.

          He whipped his hand out impulsively and caught her arm; unsuccessfully, he tried to quell the dizzying wave that hit him for the first time in a year. “Why are you marrying him?” he asked, the masochist in him begging to find out. He watched her roll her eyes and avoid his gaze.

          “Well, Sherlock, do you think it might be because I love him?”    

            damn…

            “No,” he said, masochistically, before he had a chance to restrain himself, but the more he spoke, the more he believed it. “I don’t think you do – I think you’re marrying him because he wants to get married.”

          Her jaw dropped to the floor; she stumbled for her words for a few moments, her eyes cold. He fidgeted for a few moments, trying to look her in the eye and realising that the cold glare she’d never held for anyone unless she truly hated them, scared him. He thought she’d strike him but she didn’t. He thought she’d walk out but she didn’t. A very tiny unrealistic part of him thought that she’d agree with him and they’d run off into the sunset. And then, strongly, urgently, she was speaking, and he didn’t think he’d ever paid as much attention to her as he did then. “-self obsessed bastard,” she was saying, forcing her words through his ears, “You think that I’m marrying him to get back at you? You think I’m that shallow and that my only purpose in life is you?” she paused for breath, he felt himself almost reel. “Get out of here, Ash. I’m not your girlfriend anymore, Ash. We’re over. What were you thinking, that I’d run up the aisle and fall into your arms?” she shook her head, and made for the door; he couldn’t think of anything to stop her with. “I’m marrying him because I love him. Not for any other reason.”

            “I love you.” he said urgently, feeling everything inside him freeze as she edged towards the door and out of his life.

          She shook her head. “If you had loved me, Ash, you wouldn’t be here right now. We wouldn’t.”

          She left.

          So did his heart.

-

[A/N] – I promise that this didn’t seem to be such a crappy fic in my head ^^;

I also promise that the second [and last] part is underway – that just felt like a good place to end it. With luck it should be with you all by next weekend [though, bear in mind that this is a Kaz-estimate, and this, add another year or so onto that and you’ll have it about right ^^]. And if you’ve heard the song “Crashed The Wedding”, you’ll probably have a good idea of how this will end up ^^

          This fic is dedicated to everyone to whom I owe a review – I’m sorry! And it’s also dedicated to the people of SPP Shippers ^^ I’m having so much fun modding there lately!

          I hope you enjoyed reading it ^^ I’ll get onto the next part to finish this off ^^