A/N: eljuno's request for my white_knuckle meme. Digimon.
Takeru x Ken. Title: The Neon Bright Tokyo Lights. Line: "A
nightmare of you woke me up at a quarter to three." It's a bit
odd, and I'm not really sure how it came out. A Daisuke muse
wormed his way in and started messing around. ^_^;;
"The Neon Bright Tokyo Lights"
A nightmare of you woke me up at a quarter to three. You were
smiling in that way you used to smile when you hated me. Except
you hated me in a strange way.
You hated me the way most people would love me.
I woke up in a cold sweat, naked and still sticky from sex. You
were sleeping next to me, lit in neon light and smiling- a
different smile, though. The one Daisuke gave you way back
He's been dead for how long now, but you talk about him like
he's away for the weekend. I gave up on expecting you to get
over it. After all, what would I do if Iori died? And even
when we could still Jogress I wasn't nearly as close to him as
you were to Daisuke.
Although . . . I can still hear Iori's heartbeat even now. When
I concentrate. When I space out.
But you and Daisuke were the first of our group and the
strongest. So I wonder, did you hear his always?
Because when they told us he was dead, you looked like you
I have to wonder what you hear now. Whose heart does yours beat
with? I know you love me, but I am not a "soulmate." Lovers
and soulmates are different things. Because sex doesn't even
come into that equation. You never think of Daisuke when we
sleep together, but sometimes when we hold hands or kiss- the
really light, innocent kisses- sometimes when we are like that,
your eyes glaze over and I think I see him again in the back of
You aren't the person that was Daisuke's partner. Well, you
are, but not in the way that he would remember you. You are
louder now and laugh more and have developed a really terrible
sense of humor.
You are a lot like him now, in fact. It's not even on purpose
from what I can tell.
Sometimes I pretend that I can still see him when I look at you.
Sometimes I really can, too. The places that he touched you,
the ways that he saved you.
Messiahs always die young, though. It's just a thing they do .
. . another part of the superhero gig, I guess. They have to
die young and perfect and beautiful. Like Daisuke died. Like
my brother and Taichi died. Quickly and violently and
absolutely without warning. Car crash, train wreck, aneurysm,
heart attack, whatever. Quick and violent and unexpected, like
the way they lived.
It's really such a pain in the ass.
You and I aren't heroes, though- we're the clean-up duty. The
"hope" and the "kindness": the ones who clean up afterwards and
comfort the survivors. The ones who can only die together.
I like that idea, at least. Because if we have to die, I'd hate
for either of us to be left alone again.
You're still asleep.
I trace the memory of that first smile across your face and
think about the ghosts of people that I have loved.
* ende *
. : you and i take breath like one : .