Note: This is really weird. I got bored in math and decided to write this. Flames are okay...maybe...but constructive criticism is better.

This fic is one-shot. It's in a really weird style, so please bear with me. ^_^

~*~

Who's in my bed? Do you want to guess? Ha! I won't tell you. You can be the sleuth.

Every day I leave to go wander. To tell you the truth, I don't know why I leave the comfort of my home so often. Perhaps it's because I want adventure. Before I leave, I blow kisses to the burly man in my bed. Sometimes I wake him up for an early-morning snog, but this man gets mad when I do such a thing.

When I'm gone, I miss him dearly. I wish he would come with me, but he does not like leaving the house.

"I love you," he says. I always smile and say the same. He loves my long blonde hair, my personality, and everything about me, according to him. Personally, I just love his dick.

When we retire, he hops right into bed. However, I strip for my love. I remove my silky gown and water bra while he cheers. Last but not least, I remove my blonde wig.

Did I surprise you? If you thought I was Eowyn, you now owe the author of this stupid fic fifty dollars. I am a man. My lover and I have both agreed that drag is indeed my style. After I strip for my love, I get into bed with him.

Who's in my bed?

I'll tell you now.

The man in my bed is my brother, Boromir.