A/N: I love the episode with Sara Logan and the scenes with her and john
were so great, I decided to write a story about how he reacted to her loss.
This is my first Law&Order:SVU fic, so I hope you like it.
Good Bye, Sara
John Munch looked up from the grave in front of him to watch the sunset.
The inscription on the grave was simple. Just the name Sarah Logan, the day
she was born and the day she died. He gave a small, wry smile that only one
who know him would notice. He remembered saying she was gutsy and eloquent,
then her saying that should be her epitaph. As the sun continued to sink
John looked back down at the grave. He knelt down and placed the flowers
he'd brought beside the stone.
He been to the funeral a week before, but wanted to come again now, alone.
"I'm sorry Sarah. So sorry. Talked to the flower shop yesterday. The one
the flowers that psycho sent you were from. They told me about the card
that was on those flowers. The card with my name. That's why you didn't
worry about opening them. You thought they were from me. I'd even thought
of sending you flowers. But you were a victim in an active case. I knew I'd
have to wait until your case was solved, closed. I knew it would be more
than worth the wait. I worked so hard to be professional with you. Not to
let my feelings show."
He fell silent for several minutes. Thinking back to when they first met.
It had been late, or rather early, very early in the morning. He gotten a
call to meet a victim at the hospital. When he arrived he was directed to
her room.
"Sarah Logan?" He asked from the door. He was glad to see that it didn't
look as if she been beaten as well as raped.
"Yes. Come in."
"I'm Detective John Munch. I'll be working on your case," he explained.
"Okay. I guess you want to know what happened," she said and took a shaky
breath.
"Yes. But take your time."
He's ended up spending over an hour with her and then taking her home.
His mind returned to the present.
"You wanted to know why. Why you were raped. You were in the wrong place at
the wrong time. As much as I despise clichés, this time it's true. I also
found out why you were killed. It was because you were raped. The idiot
thought it somehow lessened you. Took away from your perfection. It didn't.
It added to it. Made you stronger. Made you care more about others who'd
suffered the same thing."
The sun finally set and the sky started darkening even more quickly.
"I have to go Sarah. But I'll be back again. Good bye, Sarah," he said then
slowly turned and walked away.
2 MONTHS LATER
Once again John Munch set the flowers on Sara's grave. "Told you I'd come
back. Had to talk to a shrink earlier today. She was good. Really good. She
said that I believed in true love and felt unbearable pain because I'd
never found it for myself. She was partly right. I think I could have found
it. With you."
John stopped and took a deep breath. Just as on his previous visits he
looked up and watched the sun sink lower.
"Even the bastard who killed you saw it. He said it looked like we could
have been something. He's right. We could have. We were. We were friends.
We could have been so much more."
"Anyway, the shrink said that my wives had all been beautiful, but unable
to match me intellectually. She's right. But you could match me
intellectually. And you were so beautiful. So very beautiful. You were
everything I could want in a woman. I wished I'd had a chance to tell you
that."
His phone rang. "Munch."
"It's Stabler."
A moment later he closed his phone.
"Sorry, Sara. I have to go," he said, then slowly turned to leave. As he
got further from her gave his pace increased to normal.
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