Disclaimer: Blah. You know.

I'm sorry. But you didn't come for the apology, you came for the chapter.

Note on the flashback: I am aware I made major mistakes in the canon, ages, what people do and don't know, and personality. Please don't comment on them, because my "fixing" them probably will just make them worse.

Please do not curse at me in your reviews, as, while it does get chapters, my ego goes down the tubes like you have no idea. I don't swear in my fics; please show me the same courtesy in your reviews. Thanks.

(divider)

Tohru didn't get it at first. That much was obvious by the airheaded stare she gave him.

"Ah... what" She tried hesitantly, blinking in confusion. Akito glared at her, and then shook his head.

"Never mind. I wouldn't expect a stupid girl like you to understand something like my mind. Or be able to come up with a solution. What IS it that makes all the Sohmas "love" you? You're a foolish, insipid girl who can't possibly understand this family." He ranted in a low undertone. The girl just stood there, looking at him in confusion.

"...what" She tried again but Akito wasn't listening, choosing to ignore the girl's question.

"That stupid cat thinks I'll tell everything to you, just like my rat and he do, just like that rabbit does, and Ayame. How can you be so loved by a family that has no purpose to love? They think you can fix everything don't they? Like some kind of magician, you're going to swoop down with your bright smile that Shigure tells me about, and the understanding eyes that Momiji raves about. How can they love YOU, of all people"

"Akito-san, you're not making sen"

"HOW"

"I don't know..." She replied quietly, staring at the floor as if it was terribly interesting.

"I thought so." Akito said mockingly, sitting on the bed, covering up smoothly his lack of control as if it had been planned. He looked over at the window casually, pretending this conversation wasn't important, a simple chat about the weather instead of the probing command rising in him.

"Ask me something Tohru Honda. Something you've always wanted to know. I won't yell." He said coolly, looking down at his long nails. He'd never noticed how small his hands were... how weak. Bony and skeletal, the hands of death. Why was he noticing this now! He panicked, placing the hand back on the bed, as if there it wasn't a part of him.

"Er..." Tohru was still trying to comprehend what he was asking her but she finally ended up asking,

"Why are you so bitter" She stepped back immediately after asking, as if she was afraid he would yell or try to strike her, despite his promise. Akito turned his attention to her icily.

"I am bitter because I am hated, and hate. I was chosen at birth to be the Sohma head and I have one purpose; to die. Wouldn't you be bitter, Honda-san" His voice was calm, easy, as he turned to look at her, waiting for her response. The brunette hesitated, and then spoke softly, not lifting her eyes to look into his.

"Wouldn't it be better to live happily with the time you have, instead of being bitter? You, or I, could die at any second Akito-san, we're not promised any time. I could die right now, and you could live to be 80. Nothing is certain."

The older teen was silent, then looked away proudly. "Ask me something else." He commanded, not letting her answer ruffle him. Tohru paused, but the question was quicker in coming this time.

"Why do you hate Kyo-kun"

"The Cat." Akito corrected automatically. Tohru shook her head stubbornly, though inwardly wondering if Akito would get mad that she corrected him.

"No, just Kyo-kun."

"Why do I hate... Kyo." He repeated, spitting out the last word like a bitter taste in his mouth.

"He is the Cat. Of course I hate him. He has freedom from this suffocating family and he wastes it by chasing the rat uselessly. And his hideous other form, who couldn't hate him? He is cocky, arrogant, a fool. But the Cat is always a fool, so that at least is understandable."

"But, Kyo-kun is still human"

"Less human than all the other Sohmas. If he didn't wear that bracelet, he wouldn't be human at all"

"Then why do you let him keep the bracelet if you hate him so much Akito-san..."

"The other Sohmas don't desire to see that THING running around."

"But"

"Ask me another question." Akito said, brushing aside all other comments she may have had. He couldn't, WOULDN'T, lose his calm. Not in front of her, becoming like the rest of the Sohmas; putty in her hands.

"Why did you hurt Hatori-sensei" She asked and the Sohma head stared at her, nerves jumping with the sudden change of subject. He hadn't anticipated...

"Hatori" He questioned, more to buy himself time then any real confusion.

"Why did you keep him and Kana from getting married" The girl inquired, stepping forward slightly, moving towards the bed where Akito sat, now tensed.

"I- he would have endangered the Sohmas. He HAD, by telling her the secret. She had to forget."

"But why couldn't she have known? She loved him. She would have been all right as long as she had Hatori-sensei."

"She went insane. She obviously couldn't handle knowing." Akito said self-assuredly but the Honda girl pressed on, battering at his defenses.

"She only began to feel guilty after Hatori was hurt..." She said quietly.

"Ask me another question." Akito said, trying to divert her attention. The brunette stiffened, realizing the obvious change of topic.

"What is the point in this Akito-san"

/An easy one./ Akito mused, smirking faintly. There wasn't any danger.

"To tell you what you want to know of course, my dear Honda-san."

"But every time the conversation goes in a direction you don't want, you can change it, demand another question"

"Who are YOU Tohru Honda, to question my way of doing this" Akito responded, furious and quietly seething.

"I'm no one, just Tohru Honda." She said quietly, fingers playing with the edge of her shirt as her blue eyes lifted to stare at the Sohma head.

"Ask." He said stubbornly, rushing past the uncommon silence.

"Why do you allow Kyo-kun to keep his bracelet"

"I have my reasons."

"What reasons Akito-san"

"Ask another question"

"No! This is my question, so stop running away" The girl exploded then her eyes widened and she froze, panicked.

"G-gomen nasai! I apologize for my rudeness Akito-san." /Oh mom, what have I done?/ She stared down at her feet, a dark blush parading across her cheeks. She was unable to look at the older teen, who sat silent, eyes closed.

Finally, his silence broke.

"I..."

His word seemed to hover in the air, shot, before coming to rest in the stream of its fellows.

"I allow the Cat to keep his bracelet because it saves him. And he once saved me..."

Akito kept his eyes closed, remembering, trying to put the sight of Tohru in his mind's eye away, replaced with one of a pond...

"It... it was a deep pond..."

flashback

It was a deep pond. The koi inside it had long died, the remaining ones taken out by Akito's mother, saying her son only loved the birds, light, flying, FREE. She wouldn't allow any son of HERS to emulate the captive fish. No, the birds were his animal, fish would not be tolerated.

How ironic that the pond was to be his death.

Akito hadn't planned it out, never paused to consider the option. But as he stood on the side of the pond, balancing on one of the rocks, he stared at his reflection.

"Why do I have to wait for death? They'll all abandon me now, they won't wait for me to die. Who would make friends with a walking ghost"

That was a game he played sometimes"walking ghost". He'd wander through the Sohma house, 'haunting', and everyone would get out of his way, keep out of the same room. And like a ghost, he could feel this was a training exercise to become numb. To not need people.

He stared down at his reflection again, black hair brushing low over his shoulders. His mother had told him to cut it... but he hadn't. A disobedience, one he would be spanked for.

/I don't want to get spanked.../ Akito mused, then another thought reoccurred. /I don't want to die for the Sohmas./ He looked down at the pool, and promptly jumped in, the water making hardly a ripple as he went straight to the bottom.

/I'm light-weight... the fish are more free then birds. They have the darkness, the black, the... I'm choking/ The Sohma's eyes widened and he struggled.

/Choking, air! Mommy! Tori, Ayame, DADDY/

A hand gripped his collar suddenly, yanking him upwards, towards light. Akito instinctively inhaled and got a mouthful of water, sputtering and panicking.

"Calm down" A voice yelled at him and the Sohma did his best to comply, going very still. His rescuer's hair was orange, he noticed as the other boy dragged him back to the pond's bank. He was younger, significantly younger, but he knew how to swim. Akito stared at him.

"You're strong." He commented once they were safe on shore and he had regained his breath. The other stared at him, then smirked faintly, confused but proud.

"I learned from my sensei. Why'd you jump into the pond"

"I don't know... I wanted to."

"Okay... well, I'm Kyo."

"A-Akito... are you the Cat"

"Yeah, everyone calls me that. Will you call me Kyo" The orange-haired boy looked hopeful, but Akito's mother's warnings where already playing in the black-haired Sohma's head.

"My mother says, that I shouldn't call the Cat anything but the Cat. She says I have to. I'm... I'm sorry."

"It's all right..." The other boy said quietly, hiding his disappointment. "Everyone just judges me because I have to wear this bracelet. Everyone... hates me..."

"I don't! And your... sensei doesn't! And your mother can't possibly hate you." Akito knew this first-hand, his own mother always telling him everything that she did was out of love for him.

"But... she's scared of me. She lies and says she's not, but she is." Kyo said sadly, staring down at his bracelet.

Akito blinked. "She's scared of you? Why" He couldn't imagine his own mother fearing him, her black eyes wide in terror, long spidery hands twitching in fear. It just wasn't possible to fear your own child!

"I... I change into something when this bracelet goes away." Kyo held up his arm where the bracelet clinked together, white and black beads circling his wrist widely. "Everyone hates me because of it..." He said softly, unhappily.

"Then I'll always let you keep that bracelet" Akito said suddenly, smiling at the thought that he could do something to help his rescuer. "No matter what, you saved me so I'll save you. None of the Sohmas can take it from you"

"But, how'll you make them not take it? You're just a kid like me..."

"I'll find a way" The older boy said stubbornly. Kyo smiled faintly, caught between bemusement at his immature elder, and thankfulness for the pledge.

"Thanks then, Akito-san."

"Akito? Akito, are you out here" A voice called and Akito turned, seeing his mother coming and realizing he was soaking wet.

"My mother's here... I have to go." He said, standing. The Cat, no, KYO, he had resolved that he would call the cat Kyo if only in his head, smiled and stood as well, heading off in the other direction.

"See you then, Akito-san." Kyo said, waving a little as he left.

Akito's mother came up behind him, staring after the orange-haired boy.

"Was that the Cat Akito" She asked, words dripping with venom. Akito looked up at her innocently.

"Hai, that was Kyo."

"The CAT." She corrected, staring at her son icily. He shivered under her glare and nodded.

"Hai, the... Cat."

"I don't want you near him. I won't have my son tainted by the infection of the Cat's curse. You are special Akito, you don't need something like him." She accented the word 'thing' so there could be no mistaking that she thought of the cat as 'it', not 'him'.

"O...kay..." Akito replied sadly.

end flashback

"A-Akito-san..." Tohru started after he finished but the Sohma head interrupted.

"That is the only reason I allow him to keep it, my dear Honda-san. It was a promise, and I keep my promises, even if I do stretch the boundaries. Even though the Cat is nothing but a fool, I allow him to keep that bracelet."

(divider)

Kyo blinked, having heard all of the conversation and shocked. He opened the door, key clinking loudly in the lock, and threw it open, staring at Akito.

"You..."

The Sohma head looked at him coolly, as if he had been waiting for him.

"Does that answer your question Cat"

"You..." Kyo stared, eyes flaming. "You're a moron."

"Such gratitude was expected. Are you done with interrogating me by means of Honda-san now? I expected no more from you Cat, you always were underhanded and sneaky."

"You're mixing me up with your precious rat Akito. And you opened yourself up, I didn't do anything" Kyo said, smirking but frustrated. Akito stood slowly.

"I don't have to explain anything more to you then."

"What! Explain why you took my bracelet"

"Ask the dear rat Kyonkichi." Akito said, smirking and left the room, leaving Tohru and Kyo standing in its center, Tohru staring at Kyo and Kyo staring after Akito.

"What the..."

"He called you... Kyonkichi" Tohru said in confusion and the cat's eyes narrowed.

"He's... DEAD" He yelled angrily, veins beginning to pulse on his head; zooming down the stairs with unnatural speed, Tohru running after him at a slightly more sedate pace. Unfortunately for Kyo, at unnatural speeds, certain important details are missed and so Kyo missed the fact that Yuki was on the stairs until he had plowed right into the unsuspecting rat.

"GAHHH"

"STUPID CAT"

-THUNK-

"Oww..." The now-feline Kyo groaned, rolling over.

"Get OFF me" A squeak came from beneath him and Kyo blinked, shifting to see the rat scamper away from underneath him. "Stupid cat..."

The canine Shigure looked over at Tohru in concern, to where she was sitting with eyes going round in circles. "Are you all right my desert flower" He asked eloquently and the girl nodded.

"Haiiii... is Shigure-sensei all right? I think I landed on you..."

"That was kind of the point." The dog said, beaming as he remembered the instant genius of his plan while watching the crisis unfold. Tohru had, as soon as she saw Kyo run into Yuki, leapt forward to keep them both from falling, which would have worked- except for the fact that them both changing into animals overbalanced her, falling forward. Shigure, being the genius he was, ran over and caught all three... promptly changing into a dog himself.

Akito stared at the pile of animals and girl at the foot of the stairway, not having left quite yet.

"Yes, they would definitely be too much of a danger to keep around the Main House." He mused to himself, then went into the kitchen to inform Hatori that they were leaving.

Kyo growled, poofing back into his regular self and quickly dressing, Tohru staring avidly at a corner.

"I'm still going to kill him." The Cat muttered angrily, but by the time he was dressed again, Akito was about to leave, Hatori at his side. The Sohma head looked over at the already-changed and dressed Shigure.

"You will come by the house again, won't you Shii." He asked, but somehow it wasn't so much of a question as a certainty. Shigure smiled enigmatically.

"Of course Akito-san. Sayonara." He answered smoothly, pushing up his novelist glasses casually. The black-haired Sohma looked at the pile, covering up a snicker with a cough.

"Good luck Shigure." He said, then turned, heading out to the car Hatori had parked in the front yard. Hatori looked over at Shigure and the novelist waved happily.

"Bye Ha'ri! I'll miss you ever so much"

"WAIT" Came a loud yell from up the stairs and a blur of white and red came streaming down the stairs, coming to a screeching halt in front of Hatori.

"No one told me Ha'ri was here" Ayame pouted, turning a mock glare on Shigure. The dog shrugged and Kyo sulked, glaring at Ayame.

"Maybe because they didn't want you doing your little scary thing..."

"Oh Kyonkichi, how can you say such a needlessly cruel thing" Ayame cried, whacking him over the head none-too-gently with a fan that had magically appeared.

"Well, Ha'ri, shall we go" He said happily and the doctor turned mutely to go.

"Can I drive this time" Ayame continued excitedly, the dragon's only response being an audible " ". There was the slamming of car doors as the group got in, but then the sound of footsteps returning. Hatori poked his head back inside, looking at Shigure.

"Shigure."

"Hai" The writer asked curiously. Hatori hesitated, then said quietly.

"If you're going to visit Akito, do it soon."

Shigure stared at him, Kyo catching the quiet words as well but not commenting. Yuki and Tohru had already left to do other things.

"How long..." The dog asked softly and the doctor lifted his shoulders slightly, shaking his head.

"Maybe a week, maybe two. Only Kureno, Akito, you and I know so far."

"Thank you for telling me..." Shigure said quietly and the doctor nodded, returning to the world outside, shutting the door softly behind him.

(divider)

It was only four days, as it turned out. The deterioration was steady and fast until at the end of the fourth day, the Sohma head couldn't even speak. Hatori was the only one with him when he died.

Akito's funeral was largely attended, many crying or hugging others in consolation. A certain grey-haired boy held a brunette dressed all in black tightly, as if he'd wanted to do this for a long time. His face was streaked with tears, as was hers. An orange-haired boy stood at the tombstone, staring at what was engraved on it sadly.

'Akito Sohma, 1983-2005.

A life lived for others.'

He could feel rage churning inside him, and a stinging in his nose and eyes. Everything had been explained to him... by that kuso nezumi and the dog of all people. He choked on his tears, forcing them back in his eyes.

"Yeah. A life lived for others."

He stared down at the black and white beads imprisoning his wrist, slipping them off and holding them in his hand a moment before letting them slip, clinking among the white flowers around the tombstone.

The orange-haired boy lowered his head, saying a small prayer, then started walking away, as rain began to fall.

-The End -

(divider)

Major thanks go out to all of my reviewers and readers. Thank you so much!

I'm sorry for the death... so please don't yell at me. I hate killing Akito too.

Finished: 3:38pm 2/5/05