OP: “Taking Over Me,” by Evanescence (the unofficial soundtrack for Raven's entire life).

evanescence, n., something that is vanishing or fading away. something scarcely perceptible.

--

(The pre-OP scene shows Beast Boy walking into Titans Tower, for the first time in his life. It was an audition of sorts, where heroes from around the world met with S.T.A.R. Labs to determine who met the needs of the two in charge of the team's assembly. Beast Boy walked into the Tower's training gym to meet these two heroes for the first time in his life. One was Robin, the legendary Boy Wonder. The other was a mysterious girl with purple hair, dark eyes, and an expression to match. Beast Boy gave the girl a cocky smile and commented on her stylish wardrobe. The girl frowned at him, apparently unimpressed.)

(“I'll make you like me if I have to try for a thousand years,” Beast Boy said cockily. Never did he think that his promise would become so important to him in the months to come.)

(Abstract scene, showing Raven falling into darkness, and Beast Boy jumping after her, only to grasp her in a fierce hug. He would never let her go, as they both fell into nothingness.)

Teen Titans: Evanescence

(Scene from SHADOWS – Beast Boy's hand resting on Raven's pale white face. He can barely contain his tears. Now, more than ever, Beast Boy realized that this strange girl who shunned the world in her own way, was more important to him than anyone else in the world – even the blond-haired girl he claimed to love.)

(Abstract scene – Raven descending as an angel towards Beast Boy, before her white feathered wings are burnt to ashes, and she is sent falling into Hell.)

I knew you loved me then...

I believe in you! I'll give up everything just to find you!
I have to be with you to live, to breathe!
You're taking over me!

(Scene with black background, showing Beast Boy's pendent - a medallion with a bird (a raven) flying on one side, and a wolf running on the other. And the word FOREVER underneath. As the scene progresses, Beast Boy and Raven appear on opposite sides of the pendant, looking at each other with eternal longing. They look like mirror images, both in mourning, and both in love.)

(End OP)

--

Beast Boy, teenage titan of justice, sat in the infirmary of Titans Tower with a dejected expression. After the death of Raven only one month ago, so much had changed in his life. He had to get used to the fact that Raven wasn't around anymore. He had to deal with a mountain of press coverage dealing with the death of one of the legendary Titans. And he had to deal with the growing suspicion that Terra wasn't telling him the truth about herself. Ever since Raven's death, things had gone downhill.

And the worst part of it was, he wasn't coping with it as well as he should have. As Robin put it, “We have to move on. There are people who still depend on us, and villains from all over the city will use this moment of weakness to strike. We have to be strong. It's what Raven would want.” But Beast Boy couldn't move on. He couldn't shake that lingering feeling of incompleteness. Without Raven around... Beast Boy felt empty, like a portion of his soul was missing.

Plus, there was the “gift” left behind by Raven's father, the source of all the suffering from last month. Trigon used Beast Boy as a host to get to Raven and the other Titans. Beast Boy was the instrument of Trigon's revenge, and he'd been really good at it. The burden of knowing that you were almost responsible for the destruction of the entire world was a lot for the carefree, joke-filled boy to handle. And if that wasn't bad enough, Trigon's touch affected Beast Boy in more ways than one. Even after Trigon's defeat and Raven's self-sacrifice, Beast Boy still felt the effects of Trigon's presence. He was cursed.

“Try again,” the S.T.A.R. infirmary medic said. “Try changing into a chimpanzee.”

Beast Boy closed his eyes and concentrated. He imagined every hair, every finger and toe, and every joint of the creature's body. He clenched the muscles of his stomach nervously, afraid to change again. But slowly, he overrode his fears and let his body transform as it always had. He imagined the chimpanzee, and will himself to become one.

Only instead of a chimpanzee, he became a demonic imp with green scales and blood for drool. Beast Boy shrieked in this new form, creating a high-pitched squeal that sounded like metal scratching metal. The doctor yelled and jumped away as Beast Boy quickly reverted to his normal form, panting for breath. The sudden shock of changing into something inhuman – something unnatural – frightened him to the point of terror.

The doctor recovered his senses and slowly walked over to the bed. “I thought for sure we had it this time. We used our most potent purification mixture to clean out your body and any infections that might be there.”

“I don't think this problem is that kind of infection, doc,” Beast Boy said sadly. “No matter what I try to change into, I become something... evil, instead. It's gotta be because of Trigon.”

“We have researchers who specialize in demonology,” the doctor said as he jotted some notes behind his clipboard. “We have them working diligently to find the nature of this contamination and its cure.”

“Do you really think there is one?” Beast Boy asked with subdued hope.

The doctor smiled in a friendly manner. “I am sure there is.”

Beast Boy frowned. “I hope so too. Oh, am I done here?”

“Yes, you can go.” The doctor reached into a drawer and held up a lollipop. “Hungry?”

The teen was about to pass, but he thought about his childhood, when going to the doctor for a shot or a tooth pulling seemed less painful when a lollipop was given afterwords. Beast Boy reached out and took the lollipop, unwrapped it slowly, then put it in his mouth. The cherry flavor seeped across his tongue pleasantly.

“Thanks, doc,” Beast Boy said, turning towards the door.

“You are very welcome,” the doctor replied.

He left the room, leaving the doctor to finish up his paperwork. Beast Boy walked with his hands in his pockets, his head bowed as he thought about nothing in particular. He was in a daze, wandering down the hallways of S.T.A.R. Labs, only vaguely aware of his surroundings.

“Hey you,” said a gentle, female voice. Beast Boy gasped slightly because he recognized that voice. He whipped around to see Jinx, one of the star pupils of H.I.V.E. Academy, standing there with her arms crossed and a pitying smile on her face.

Beast Boy turned fully and brought his hands up for a fight. “What the heck are you doing here?”

Jinx unfolded her arms and lifted her hands, revealing a pair of handcuffs on her wrists. “Getting arrested. The DF's who were supposed to watch me went to get some coffee, so I snuck in here looking for a water fountain. Don't worry.” Jinx tilted her head, showing a fresh pinprick wound in her neck from a needle. It was probably one of the defense force's anti-magic serums used to trap magicians they caught. “I've been de-clawed already.”

Beast Boy loosened up slightly. “I'd better take you to them. They'll never find you by themselves.” He stepped forward, ready to grab her wrist, but Jinx held her hands up defensively and asked him to wait.

“I-I just wanted to say something,” she said quickly. Beast Boy stopped and waited. Jinx continued. “I wanted to say that I'm sorry about Raven.”

“What do you care,” Beast Boy muttered. “You're a criminal. You hurt people for a living and you don't care about anyone but yourself.”

“Hey!” Jinx snapped. “I may be a criminal, but that's for my own reasons! I love some people just as much as you do!”

“I'll believe that when I see it.” Beast Boy scowled and leaned against the wall, hands in his pockets again. Jinx relaxed a bit when she realized that he wasn't going to drag her off to the authorities. At least not yet. So Jinx leaned against the wall and looked at the floor sadly. Scientists walked past them without giving them a second thought.

“You know... that's why she's afraid to tell you the truth,” Jinx said with a frown. “You judge people without even hearing all the facts.”

“What?”

“Most heroes are like that. They assume that because a girl tries to steal things and hurt people, that she doesn't have a soul like they do.” Jinx said this somberly, with her personal experience backing it. “They don't stop to think that she might have a reason.”

“...When you say 'she's afraid' to tell me the truth,” Beast Boy asked, “who are you talking about?”

Jinx glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. “I know you're the 'funny' one, which means you're not very bright. But do I really need to answer?”

Beast Boy frowned. “I'm just hoping that it's somebody else, and not who I think it is.”

“She and I have talked in chat rooms every now and then,” Jinx said, reaching up to scratch her nose and causing her handcuffs to clank. “She's petrified of what might happen if she told you. She's certain that you would hate her afterwords.”

“...You and her chat?” Beast Boy asked suspiciously.

“Prisoners can chat an hour a night, like in a library,” Jinx said. “I happened to run into her in the 'Superheroes Only' chat room. We figured it out from each other's stories who the other was, and that we were the only real superheroes in the room. Ever since then, we've had an understanding.”

“Oh,” he muttered. “But why is she so afraid of telling me the truth? And what is it that she's hiding? No matter what it was, I wouldn't hate her for it.”

Jinx frowned at him. “Are you certain of that? Or are you just saying that because you 'love' her?”

Beast Boy paused. After a moment of thought, he continued. “Friendship is stronger than hatred. It's gotta be.”

Jinx leaned against the wall and looked at Beast Boy with her half-closed eyes, almost like a model in a slinky position. But for Jinx, it seemed that the serum used to contain her powers was also making her sleepy. She shook her head and sighed. “I've seen the future. If Terra tells you her secret, you would hate her.”

“You can't see the future,” Beast Boy said with certainty. “Every file we've got on you says you got magic similar to Raven's and are a decent acrobatics expert. That's it.”

Jinx smiled gently. “A girl's allowed to have secrets, right?”

Beast Boy frowned. “Fine. But I don't believe it. I'd never do that to Terra, no matter what. Everybody can be forgiven.”

“Even Slade?” Jinx suggested with an accusatory tone. “Or someone just like him?”

“Slade is evil,” Beast Boy said. “He can't-” He stopped in mid-sentence.

Jinx smiled cynically, then closed her eyes. “You were saying?”

Beast Boy was at a loss for words. Not at the fact that he was contradicting himself, but at what Jinx implied in her statement. Terra... was she 'someone just like Slade'?

“Terra is someone I've grown to care about,” Jinx said softly. “Much like you and the witch. I would be grateful if you just broke the relationship now. The results of that would be better than the future I saw in my dream.”

“What future?” Beast Boy asked. “Is it that bad?” Beast Boy said softly.

Jinx nodded slowly. Her eyes shimmered from impending tears. She turned away, ashamed of her sadness. She wiped her eyes clean before turning around again.

“I know I don't deserve to ask you for anything, since I'm a 'bad guy' and all. But please think about what I said. Things might be better if you and Terra just broke up now. It would definitely be better for Terra. And it would keep you from feeling guilty about your feelings for the witch.”

Beast Boy was silent. He didn't need to ask about his 'true love'. He knew that secret by heart.

“There she is!” shouted a man. Beast Boy looked down the hall and saw two masked, armored men running towards them, laser rifles drawn. They stopped and grabbed Jinx roughly, pulling her between them. “Sorry about that, Sir! She tricked us and tried to escape! We're thankful for your help in recapturing her!”

'She tricked us and escaped', Beast thought. Yeah, right. It was just like the San Francisco Defense Force to try and cover their butts that way. Their jobs were so easy when they had people like the Teen Titans protecting the city for them. Beast Boy disliked these guys more and more each day. If the Teen Titans weren't around, the city would fall to its knees.

“It was nice talking to you,” Jinx said, moments before the two DF grunts roughly dragged her away.

Beast Boy sadly watched her go and thought about what Jinx said. He doubted what she said was true about his reaction if Terra told him the truth. But now that he knew what the 'truth' might be, he wasn't sure what he would do. Would he hate her if she said she was 'just like Slade'? He couldn't imagine himself hating Terra. But being like Slade was like being the Devil himself.

That thought reminded him of Raven again. He palmed his face and ran his fingers through his hair as he groaned in exasperation. Everything was going so well in Beast Boy's life until recently. Why was everything going so horribly now?

Raven... Beast Boy thought sadly. He turned towards the front entrance and finally left S.T.A.R. Lab's public building. He didn't feel like hanging out downtown, with Terra “on leave” who-knew-where, so he decided to head home instead.

Although it didn't feel like home anymore.

--

(Titans Tower)

Cyborg waxed the T-Car slowly but surely. His mind wandered to the past, when he built this car from scratch in this very garage. Technically, he and Raven built it together since Overload and Gizmo contributed to wrecking the first car he built. Cyborg remembered those few days fondly, when Raven actually seemed curious and eager to help him. It felt like having Starfire at his side, only different because he knew it was Raven at heart. It seemed that even Raven had a sweet side to her. It was just hard to find, and even harder to notice.

Cyborg's proximity sensors picked up the biometrics of a new body in the room. Judging from the peculiar mixture of human, mutant, and demonic DNA, it could only be one person. “I guess the cure didn't work this time either.”

“Nope,” Beast Boy said. He'd changed from his hero costume of purple and black spandex into a set of street clothes that amounted to a pair of baggy cargo pants, a green shirt the same color as his hair, and a pair of sneakers to walk on the cold metal floor of the garage. Beast Boy walked over to the work bench and plopped in Cyborg's work chair, which was big enough to hold him and easily twice as big as Beast Boy.

“Don't worry 'bout it, bro,” Cyborg said with his usual confidence. “If my dad's company could reconstruct 90% of my body, then they can get rid of this problem of yours. It just takes time.”

“Yeah,” Beast Boy agreed, his voice lacking enthusiasm. He fiddled with a socket wrench lying on the work bench. “So where's Robbie and Star? Didn't see them upstairs.”

“Robin's helping with a Joker problem down in Dakota City, so he'll be gone until tomorrow at least. Star's on her way home from Tamaran.”

“Ryand'r getting used to being a prince yet?” Beast Boy joked.

“He hates it,” Cy laughed. The two boys had a good laugh at Star's brother's expense. The joviality was short-lived though, and a tense silence followed.

“You know, I went into Raven's room the other day,” Cyborg said. Beast Boy looked up with shock. “I know, I know, 'we should never be in Raven's room'. But the guys in charge want me to catalog her stuff for their databases.”

“Lousy jerks don't have any respect for a person's feelings,” Beast Boy muttered. “Raven hates it when people go into her room.”

Cyborg frowned. “Yeah. But while I was in there, I found something under her bed that might interest you.” The teen walked over to the locker where he stored his snacks and personal effects, and pulled out a treasure chest as small as a shoe box. It was dark brown with bronze at the joints and lining the wooden base. He placed it on the bench in front of Beast Boy, who looked at it with concern.

“Open it up,” Cyborg suggested.

“I'm not going through her stuff,” Beast Boy said. “I'm surprised you did.”

Cyborg stared him down. Finally, Beast Boy relented and gently lifted the top of the chest. Resting inside the box were several trinkets that looked like they had religious significance – perhaps tied to Raven's rituals. But what caught Beast Boy's eye the most was a leather book, bound tightly by a leather clasp that served as a simple lock. On the front cover was a black crest of a bird that looked like a crow – or a raven.

“Dude, you READ through Raven's diary?” Beast Boy snapped. “That's horrible! Raven's not here to do it, so I'm going to kick your-!”

Cyborg put a hand on Beast Boy's mouth, shutting him up quickly and firmly. “Don't get so sensitive, B.B. I didn't read her diary. But I did notice something else.” Cyborg delicately moved the diary aside and picked up a folded plastic polaroid hidden beneath it. He then closed the box with equal gentility.

“You 'noticed' this?” Beast Boy frowned in disapproval.

“Multiple sub-harmonic vision,” Cyborg reminded him, tapping his red LED that served as an eye. “I can see through beds, boxes, clothes, whatever. And my targeting computer picks up little things that my simulated peripheral vision notices. I can't help but notice things.”

“R-right,” Beast Boy said, a little stunned. He trusted Cyborg enough to take his word for it. He just never imagined that Cyborg's vision was so complicated. Sometimes he wished Cyborg came with subtitles.

“Open it up,” Cyborg said, handing the polaroid to Beast Boy. “I saw the picture accidentally as I said. But after once glance, I couldn't let it go. I had to show it to you.”

Beast Boy glanced at the folded polaroid and noticed some writing on the back. KODAK MOMENT, September 7th 2003.

“That's the day after we went into Raven's mind,” Beast Boy noticed.

“Good memory,” Cyborg smirked. “Though I doubt you remember this scene.”

Almost concerned by that claim, Beast Boy quickly opened up the polaroid. What he saw shocked him and filled him with happiness at the same time, not unlike the feeling a mother got when seeing her newborn child for the first time. It was a picture of Beast Boy and Raven, lying on the couch together, completely knocked out in a deep sleep. A pair of Gamestation controllers lay in their laps. They were both upright and curled towards each other, for warmth or for comfort, it was hard to tell. Their faces were perfectly content and only an inch apart from each other. At the corners of the pictures, Robin and Starfire cheesed for the picture and flashed 'V' signs jokingly.

“That night, after we escaped from Raven's mind world,” Cyborg remembered, “the three of us drank tea and talked for the entire afternoon. You made a comment about Raven never playing the Gamestation, and she challenged you to your favorite game. You guys must've played that thing all night.”

Beast Boy's mouth hung open; he was still in shock from the picture. “She looks so calm. Even when her other selves came out, she never looked so peaceful.”

“I never knew what caused Miss Intellectual Goth to waste ten hours on video games,” Cyborg said in retrospect. “But then I remembered something my father told me. He would listen to Mom talk about quilting for hours, just so that he could be near her. And that made me wonder...”

Beast Boy stared at the picture. Slowly, he reached towards it and gently placed a finger on Raven's face, then trailed it down her image. She looked so beautiful in this picture. And for once in her tortured life, she looked like she wasn't afraid, wasn't scowling, and wasn't angry. She was happy.

“The moment we took the picture, Raven woke up and jumped away from the couch. Her face was red as a beet before she covered up with her hood.” Cyborg smiled fondly. “You didn't wake up until she started blasting people afterwords.”

“I remember that,” Beast Boy said, smiling fondly. “When I asked about it, you guys all laughed, and Raven just stormed out. But nobody would tell me what happened. I figured you did some prank, but I never figured out what it was.” Beast Boy laughed half-heartedly. “It wasn't that at all.”

“She swiped the picture from me later on,” Cyborg said. “I thought nothing of it; I figured she'd burn it or something. But that was several months ago.” He paused as the weight of his realization hit him. “It looks like she kept it all that time.”

Beast Boy leaned over in his chair and palmed his face. Cyborg heard gasps coming from his smaller companion and saw his shoulders shaking from emotional pain. Beast Boy wept silently in remembrance of the now-dead Titan. Cyborg watched him weep, and started to regret bringing this up. He thought it would cheer Beast Boy up. It looked like it had the reverse effect.

Cyborg's eye flickered repetitively. Beast Boy looked up suddenly as Cyborg pushed a button set where his temple should be. “Someone's calling on the tower line. No source address. Means they've shielded the phone line.”

“What does that mean?” Beast Boy asked.

“Means somebody wants to talk to us without being spotted by anyone tapping our lines or his.” Cyborg frowned. “Which could be lots of people in a city like this.”

Beast Boy stood up and put the polaroid picture in his pocket for safe keeping. “Who do you think it is?”

“I don't know. Let's go to the den and find out.” Cyborg pushed a few buttons to redirect the call, then raced out of the garage with Beast Boy. In no time, they were at the main den where most of the Titans' business was taken care of. The video screen sank from the ceiling and blocked the window that overlooked the sea around their tower's island. Cyborg grabbed the remote from between the cushions of the couch and pushed the button that would accept the call.

A black screen with the words NO IMAGE appeared on the screen, with several blocks of information underneath it, ranging from voice recording to the projected location of the call, which was currently giving an error message.

“Hello.” said a feminine voice on the other side.

“That's Jinx's voice,” Beast Boy noted. He spoke up. “Jinx!”

“Good, you're there. We need to talk. I have some information that might interest you.”

“Yeah right,” Cyborg growled. “Like we can trust anything you say.”

“It's about Raven,” Jinx said. “And Slade's plans for her.”

“His what?” Cyborg blinked.

Beast Boy pushed past him and shouted at the screen. “What plans!?”

“Man, don't listen to her bull,” Cyborg berated him. “She's just trying to take advantage of your feelings! It's probably one of Slade's traps!”

Beast Boy growled as he realized that might be true. He was letting himself be so easily manipulated by Jinx's words. And yet he wanted to know what Jinx had to say. There was a slim – almost impossible – chance that she was telling the truth, and that Slade had plans for the dead Titan.

“He might be right, Beast Boy,” Jinx said somberly. “But it's up to you what you want to do. If you want to speak to me, meet me at the high security prison tonight. You'll know how to find me.”

“Why can't you just-!” Jinx broke the call before he could finish his question. Beast Boy muttered a curse and plopped on the couch. Cyborg turned off the screen with the remote and sat down beside him.

“What did she mean, 'you'll know how to find me'?” Cyborg asked.

“She was arrested earlier. She'll be in one of the maximum security cells. Which means we have to ask the guards and go through procedure to talk to her.”

“That means she must've used her one phone call just now,” Cyborg muttered. “But... how did she shield the prison line?"

"Magic?"

"But why would she waste it on you?” Cyborg caught himself too late. “N-not that talking to you is a waste of time. Far from it! Heh heh heh...”

Beast Boy stuck his tongue at Cyborg, then got serious again. “Jinx might be telling the truth. I think she really knows something about Raven and Slade. But what would Slade want with someone who is...”

Cyborg looked down at himself, and flexed his mechanical hands. “In an age like ours, where there's magic, science, and evolution, it's hard to say what is truly 'mortal' and what is 'immortal'.”

“Subtitles?” Beast Boy prompted while massaging the side of his head in agitation.

“If Jinx is telling the truth, then he might have a way to use Raven against us, even when she died.” Cyborg looked across the room to the DVD library of the Titans, and scanned the horror movies with a casual glance. “Maybe he thinks he can pull a Frankenstein.”

“I'm all for jokes, Cy, but now's not the time,” Beast Boy groaned.

“I'm serious,” the teen replied. “We already know from our fight with Thunder and Lightning that Slade is trained in magic, of all things. He used the two to make a fire elemental and showed off some fancy magic skills in his fight with Robin.”

“Right...”

“We know that Slade's got incredible engineering skills and even greater resources. He can make an army of those Slade-bots of his. And he made those giant worm-bots that almost destroyed our tower. And he created those nanobots that would've killed us had Robin not forced him to turn them off. A guy like him could build a hundred me's.”

Beast Boy was getting progressively worried. Cyborg's logic was flawless, and Slade's abilities were difficult to ignore. As was his relentless determination to get what he wanted, no matter what laws of society or nature he had to break.

“And we know that Slade is looking for an apprentice to help him conquer the world,” Cyborg continued. “He tried to get Robin to join him but failed. Maybe he's after another Titan. One that can't resist him.”

“Like Raven,” Beast Boy said, now very concerned. “If he caught a glimpse of the fight with Trigon, he'd know about Raven's heritage.”

“If he had any spies, he could find that out pretty easily,” Cyborg said offhandedly. “What the fight with Trigon showed was that Raven had the potential to surpass all of us. Even the big league guys like Superman would be hard pressed to deal with her if Raven really cut loose. I bet you half the world breathed a sigh of relief when she-”

Beast Boy glared him into silence. The teen stood up and walked over to the den window to look at the sea. He used to enjoy swimming in those waters as a fish or dolphin. That is, when he could change into animals. Now, all he could become were demonic horrors. And it was all Trigon's fault. And what was worse, Trigon took away someone that Beast Boy cared about. Only now, when she was gone, did he realize how much he cared about her.

“I'd give anything, for Raven to come back. I'd become Slade's servant forever if I knew he'd bring her back.” Beast Boy turned around to face Cyborg, his eyes full of determination. “But I won't let Slade change Raven into a tool of evil. I want to find out if Jinx really knows something. And if it's what we think it is, we're going to put a stop to it.”

Cyborg grinned. “I was hoping you'd say that. So what's the plan? We gonna get the others, or we gonna do this ourselves while the gettin's good?”

“Let's go talk to Jinx,” Beast Boy said. “We don't need to bother the others yet.” His expression weakened for a second. “Because there's still a chance that this is just a misunderstanding, and that I'm hoping for the impossible.”

Reluctantly, Cyborg nodded in agreement. “It's possible. But we ain't gonna know 'til we see Lil' Jinx.”

Beast Boy smiled with the exuberance he had, before the tragedy. “Let's go!” Both Titans rushed to the garage, where the freshly polished T-Car was waiting. Beast Boy took shotgun, Cyborg took the wheel, and they gunned through the underground tunnel to the mainland streets. For the first time in a month they both felt the thrill of being a hero – that feeling you got when you knew you were going to save a life.

--

WHAM!! Slade's fist cracked against Terra's jaw and sent her rolling across the floor. Terra quickly got up and rubbed the side of her face where she'd been hit. That was going to leave a mark. It was a wonder it hadn't broken her jaw. Either she was getting stronger than she realized, or Slade was holding back. And Slade never held back.

“What was that for!?” she shouted, slowly pulling herself to her feet.

“I didn't punish you enough for letting the witch girl suspect you,” Slade said, slowly turning around. “Because now there are signs that the others are getting suspicious. Robin's finding the security cameras you planted too easily. And your little boyfriend is getting a little pensive around you. I'm starting to wonder how long this 'relationship' of yours will last.”

“Shut up!” Terra shouted. “Beast Boy and I-”

“Are a figment of your imagination,” Slade snapped. Terra gasped, as if those words were a physical blow. “You have no friends. And it goes without saying that you have no boyfriends. Besides, your 'pet' doesn't seem to love you as much as he used to...”

“Shut up!!” Terra yelled louder. Her eyes glowed as the earth rumbled around her. “Don't you EVER talk about Beast Boy!” She threw all of her anger into the earth, and a line of spiky rocks erupted its way towards Slade. The villain easily leapt out of the path of the attack, ran across the field to where Terra stood, and gave her a right cross that could shatter stone. The sharp pain made her yelp and knocked her to the ground, breaking her concentration. Terra lay there in a crumbled heap, her body trembling from the tears her pain caused.

“That's for talking back to your master,” Slade said, folding his hands behind his back. He turned and walked towards the exit. “Tomorrow, we'll begin the next phase of our plan. Robin and Starfire are due to return from their respective trips. That night, you'll deactivate the security systems at Titans Tower, allowing my minions access to the inside. Is that understood?”

Terra lay where she was. She looked like a rag doll, discarded by a careless child. She grunted softly, trying to bite back the pain and the tears that accompanied it.

“Good.” Slade exited the chamber, leaving Terra alone in the cold, damp cave that reminded her of a tomb. In a way, it was her tomb. Terra felt with certainty that she was dying inside. Every day, as she lied to her friends more and more, her spirit was dying. Soon, it would be gone entirely. Slade was winning this psychological battle. And although she knew it was happening, there was nothing Terra could do to stop it. Slade was breaking her spirit and ensuring that she would never run away from him.

Terra sat on her knees and cried, this time at the pain in her heart. What Slade said about Beast Boy was true – his feelings for her weren't as strong as they used to be. Either he was suspicious about her and grew nervous because of it, or he was trapped by his thoughts of Raven. Every Titan now knew, after the fact, that Raven's actions were cries of love to Beast Boy. And now, with Raven's sacrifice, Beast Boy's feelings of sympathy had changed into feelings of love. Terra had lost the battle for Beast Boy's heart, but not until Raven's death did that become clear.

Beast Boy's going to leave me, Terra thought with certainty. She hugged herself, and cried openly into the darkness of Slade's lair. All alone, she clutched her arms in a tight hug for warmth and support. But no matter how hard Terra hugged – no matter how much she cried – she didn't feel any better. There was no warmth.

No friends to save me from myself, Terra thought. If I told them the truth, they would hate me as much as they hate the other bad guys. They'd think I'm a monster. Terra forced herself to smile as an “amusing” thought came to her. I wonder... if this is what it felt like for 'you', too. Before Beast Boy broke you in.

But Terra didn't have Beast Boy. She had his heart, but only for a moment. The love she had and the love Raven had, were like a candle and a bonfire. Raven's bonfire – the fire burning in Beast Boy's heart, which he only now recognized – overwhelmed the feelings he had for Terra several times over. Terra realized that now.

Terra hoped that maybe – just maybe – if she took Beast Boy away before Slade's attack, she could tell him the truth. Even if she couldn't have his love anymore, she wanted Beast Boy's forgiveness. In her dreams, they could run away together and never look back. But knowing Beast Boy, he wouldn't just leave his friends behind. He'd never run away, but Terra dreamed of them disappearing into the sunset together, living happily ever after.

In reality, she prayed that he would forgive her for being Slade's slave. But no matter what happened, Terra knew that she'd lost the light in her life. Her reason for living. Her reason for being a good girl like the Titans wanted her to be.

Everyone hates me for loving Beast Boy. I know you understand though, Raven - what it feels like to be hated for a crime you didn't know you committed. Terra went to work on her alibi for the broken jaw she felt was there. She'd have to make up a good one to get by Robin and the others. She had to have a good excuse in case they noticed her injury.

But even if I knew in the past what I knew now, I'd still tease Beast Boy the way I did the day we met. Because the short time we had together... was worth all the pain.