Help
Home Just In Communities Forums Beta Readers Search
B s . A A A   full 3/4 1/2   E E   Light Dark
TV Shows » My So Called Life » The Things I Have To Deal With
Sonomi-chan
Author of 9 Stories
Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Reviews: 68 - Updated: 04-05-08 - Published: 06-16-04 - id:1913620

Here's the next chapter too! I was in a writing mood today! This is actually one of my favorite chapters. Enjoy!


Angela looked up to see Mrs. Krakow opening the front door. She was a slim woman who, in Angela's opinion, looked almost frail. The clothes she wore didn't do much to change the opinion either.

The "therapist look" as her father so humbly called it, consisted of off-white or cream colored business suits with her hair faithfully in a bun, usually with a pen stuck in it. Anyone with eyes could clearly tell that she was related to Brian.

The older woman looked down at Angela with a mixture of compassion and professional seriousness. Angela felt like she was being studied and instantly fidgeted as she continued standing on the porch.

"Hello, Angela. I'm glad you came". Mrs. Krakow spoke as she stepped aside to allow Angela to walk through the threshold.

"Brian is upstairs". Mrs. Krakow went straight to the point. Angela suspected that she had to go into work, meaning that she would recruit anyone she could to watch over her disturbed son until she could work him into her busy schedule.

Angela was slightly offended by her behavior and general obliviousness to what was really going on with her offspring, but ignored it for the moment as she heard Brian's heavy footsteps descending the stairs and coming into the living room where she and his mother stood.

Time seemed to pause as Brian regarded Angela's presence. From the initial look of confusion on his face, Angela was positive now that he had no idea why she was there. He turned from her to his mother and glared.

"What is she doing here"? He asked scathingly before turning his negative attention back to Angela.

If Mrs. Krakow noticed his discomfort, she chose not to acknowledge it.

"Angela wanted to see how you were doing". She said as she bustled around, gathering her things.

She was leaving again. The few times she'd ever seen Mrs. Krakow around, it was never for long. No wonder Brian acted as annoying as he did.

As she thought about this, Mrs. Krakow was already one foot out the door. Bidding them farewell, she closed the door behind herself, leaving the two teenagers alone in the room.

Suddenly, any composure she had began to drain as the situation she was in occurred to her. She was with Brian in his house...alone.

She began fidgeting even more, wishing she was just in her room with Jordan.

And just as that feeling came to her, Brian made it disappear. She didn't know why until she realized that, aside from his obvious anger that she was in his house, he was acting somewhat normal. There was no creepy behavior, and the wound he'd gotten that morning had been wrapped and was covered by his clothes.

But the most noticeable change was that he wasn't looking at her with the malice he had earlier that day.

"So, um..." She stuttered, "Your mom wanted me to come over."

He gave her a weird look, and she mentally kicked herself. If his mother wanted him to know, she would have told him she was coming over. Now she felt like she fueled the fire in his already disturbed mind. She didn't want him to think he was being constantly monitored.

She tried again. "I mean...I wanted to see how you were doing".

That seemed like the right thing to say, because he relaxed and gave her a small smile. She returned it and balled her sweater up in her hands.

"Um, do you want to sit down? I can get you something to drink if you want". He asked politely.

Angela was now uncomfortable again. If she stayed any longer than necessary, Ricky, Rayanne and Jordan would have a fit.

"Actually, my mom wants me home soon. I mean, I'll sit for a while, but I don't think I'll have time for a drink". She covered.

He seemed to believe her, because he sat down on one end of the couch and motioned for her to join him.

There was an awkward silence as they both looked at everything around the room but at one another. Angela could feel her nerves weaken with each passing minute; she desperately wanted something—anything—to happen just so she'd have an excuse to leave.

Brian seemed to take the hint and turned to face her.

"I didn't mean it when I said I hated you, Angela".

She heard the obvious squeak in his voice as he uttered those words. They were forced, but she couldn't tell if it was due to insincerity or the same nervous feeling she had.

"I know". She answered so quickly she didn't even realize she'd voiced it until he answered her back.

"Do you really know"? His tone turned from polite to almost desperate, which scared her.

"Well, now I do".

There was another awkward period in which they once again avoided eye contact. And then, the moment Angela knew would happen finally arrived. Just as the conversation was normal, Brian did a complete 180 on her.

"Why do you do this to me, Angela"?

She was taken aback by the sudden outburst and moved to the farthest side of the couch, trying to put as much distance between them as possible.

"Don't do that"! He snapped. "Don't move away from me like I'm going to hurt you"!

"What do you expect me to do, Brian"? Her voice was elevating. "Do you want me to pretend like I'm not scared? You hurt me before, Brian".

"Yes, I did. And I apologized"! He heaved an angry sigh. "Is that all you think about me? Do you, like think I'm going to hurt you every time you see me? Damnit, Angela"! He slammed his fist on the couch, causing the cushions to vibrate.

That look in his eyes was back. Angela didn't want to stick around to see it any longer.

"I'm going to go now". She said cautiously, standing slowly as she spoke. She knew before she even said the words that he wouldn't let her leave.

He lunged and caught her by the wrist, something he seemed to be good at, and shoved her against the wall behind her.

"You don't have any kind of clue how much you mean to me"! He said through heavy breathing as he struggled to keep her still.

"I'm so mad at you because I know you! I've been there through your worst experiences, through all of your firsts! I know you and you know me. And now, you throw all of that away just to be with a guy who didn't even know you existed a couple of months ago!

"I am right here, Angela! I have been here for the whole time! Why can't you see me"!

Angela's sobs of fear did not reach his ears until he finished speaking. She'd lost circulation in her hand during his speech, and she was quite sure her wrist would be black and blue by the time he let go.

"Look at me"! He screamed, using his other hand to bring her chin up. The look of fear and pain in her eyes mesmerized him in an oddly comforting way.

She was looking at him. All of the emotions she felt right then were due to him. There was no Jordan, no Ricky, no blond drunk. Just him...

Angela's fear turned to massive panic as he laughed and bent over to press his lips to hers.

"Get off"! She screamed. Before he could dodge, she brought her right hand up and slapped him with such force that he immediately fell back.

She didn't wait to see if he was alright or not; without turning back, she sprinted out the door and was across the street before she could even breathe.

Fumbling with the door knob, she shoved the door open and slammed it behind her, causing the windows near the door to shutter slightly.

She muffled her sobs with the palm of her hand as the enormity of what just happed occurred.

"What was she going to tell everyone?

She'd forgotten that they were still upstairs in her room waiting for her, probably worried because of how long she'd been there, even though it had been less than 20 minutes.

Jordan couldn't see her; he couldn't know what happened. If he found out...she didn't even want to imagine what he would do.

She cried harder. She didn't know why, but she didn't want Brian hurt. She didn't want to see him, but she didn't want him to be alone.

She really hoped she didn't hurt him too bad back there.

Review this Chapter
Share


Return to Top