|Harry Potter and the Golf Club Duel
Author: Nightstar 1000 PM
Voldemort invites Harry to a golf tournament. Warning: This is not a real story. It's more of a parody thingy. [one shot]Rated: Fiction K - English - Parody/Humor - Harry P. & Voldemort - Words: 540 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 06-22-04 - Status: Complete - id: 1925001
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Disclaimer: I do not Harry Potter or any of the other characters
Warning: This is not a story and therefore does not have an actual plot
Harry Potter was eating breakfast one day when he heard uncle Vernon scream. He dropped his spoon and ran to the front door. He found Dudley trying to get a alive and biting envelope off his head. Harry reached over and snatched the envelope. It stopped biting and went limp. He ripped open the envelope because he realized that there was no address on it. Inside was a roughly scrunched up letter. He read it.
We will see who is better at dueling this afternoon. Meet me at the muggle golf course close to your house. Be there or else.
The Dark Lord
Harry folded up the envelope and letter and threw it out. He glanced at the clock. It was almost time to go and meet Voldemort. He grabbed his wand even though he knew he was not allowed to use it and he ran out the door.
"If I don't come back in a couple of hours, please feed Hedwig for me and write to Hogwarts telling them I'm dead!" Harry called over his shoulder.
He arrived at the golf course five minutes later. Voldemort was already waiting for him. The course was already set. Harry looked around surprised.
"Stop staring already! We are going to settle this with a golf tournament," Voldemort said and threw a golf club at him. "Now I start because I'm the best." Voldemort tested the air and took aim. He swung his club and it hit the ball. The ball flew across the air and landed right in the hole. "Cool!" Voldemort called. "It's a hole in one!"
"Now it's my turn," Harry said. He cleaned the golf club with his shirt and swung it a few times in the air. Then, he hit the ball as hard as he could. It flew fifty feet up and landed with a few bounces an inch away from his tee. "Hey!" Harry yelled, getting jealous. "You so cheated!"
"How dare you say I cheat! (Well, I do but who cares.) Let's duel with magic and see who cheats!" Voldemort yelled. He whipped out his wand but Harry just stood there.
"I really wish I could duel you right now but as you can see, I'm not allowed to use magic outside of school," Harry replied.
"Oh, right. Fine then, we will use these!" Voldemort and Harry each picked up their own golf club and started a sword fight. Result: They both got knocked out and don't ask how. Hermione and Ron just happened to drop by and saw them.
After a while, they both recovered. Voldemort got mad at Harry for clubbing him, even though he clubbed Harry first, and whipped out his wand. He pointed it at Harry's head.
"That's my head, please don't remove it. I use it sometimes," Harry said as Voldemort lowered his wand.
"No, really?!" Hermione gasped out of surprise.
"Of course," Ron said, sarcastically.
A/N: I told ya that it wasn't really a story. Anyway, please review.