Starting Over

Summary: A few weeks after the Willow incident.

Disclaimer: JKR owns everything. And that's a good thing!

A/N: Please excuse my mistakes :-)

Sirius is the only one in the dorm when Remus walks in. He's reading a book on his bed and Remus pretends that he hasn't noticed him. He hopes Sirius will understand.

"Hello"

Remus just nods and murmurs something that sounds like hi. He can't even say a simple word to him. He sits on his beds and draws the curtains. All he needs is to be left alone.

"Can we talk? ... Please?"

Why can't he leave him alone?

Why can't he see he's asking too much?

It's not that Remus doesn't want to talk to him, doesn't wish things could be like they used to between them, it just seems impossible. Like a wall is separating them and nothing Sirius would say or do can break it .

It's not that Remus isn't in love with him, but it doesn't make any difference. He's been so hurt he can't afford opening those old wounds again. The thought of reliving all this pain terrifies him. He's not ready. Not yet. And he doesn't know if he'll ever be.

---

The months go by and Remus has barely exchanged a few words with Sirius. He almost believes he's over him. Just because he doesn't think of him every day and night anymore.

He's free of Sirius. Or so he assumes until one day he finally sees him. And notices the regret and the pain in the other boy's eyes.

He suddenly realizes that school is almost over and he won't see him again for three months. He doesn't want them to part like this. None of them deserves it.

People always think there's enough time, but in reality there isn't. Sooner or later you'll have to face your fears and sooner is best because there might be no later.

Remus, now, knows that and he's not scared anymore.

He walks towards Sirius and places his hand on his shoulder. The other boy freezes under the touch.

"Hello" Remus says and it's real. The first true word he's spoken to Sirius in months.

It's not much, but it's a start. And it means everything.