Author: Beautybecks PM
This is the non-slash version to a story I've already published on fafiction.net. Samwise tells Frodo why he doesn't enjoy fireworks.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Frodo B. & Samwise G. - Words: 2,623 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 07-16-04 - id: 1966300
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Hobbits of all ages gathered round to watch Gandalf's famous (or should that be infamous) fireworks display. Mothers were carefully keeping an eye on their children, wary whenever Gandalf was present because he seemed to have a certain way of leading children astray; the children themselves were waiting patiently, buzzing with anticipation and telling horror stories about goblins and orcs to pass the time; fathers were just their to drink the ale and watch the explosions. The entire Shire was there!
Everybody except for Samwise Gamgee Frodo noted, well more of concluded... after a long time spent searching. He'd searched everywhere for his dear friend but Sam was nowhere to be found. It wasn't the same without Sam so Frodo decided to return to Bag End knowing Bilbo wouldn't miss him because he was too busy reliving the past with Gandalf.
He was walking towards Bag End when he saw a familiar silhouette in the gardens.
"Sam!" Frodo called out, running to greet him. Sam dropped his watering can in surprise.
"Mister Frodo sir! I ... I thought you'd be at the fireworks display!" Sam looked at Frodo, down to the water can which was spilling its load all over the lawn, and back up at Frodo before picking the water can up. Frodo just smiled.
"Oh Sam," Frodo beamed. "What are you doing here?"
"You know me Mister Frodo. I... I don't like those large gatherings; it's too crowded like. And I thought... well I might as well come down to Bag End and tend to the garden. It is my duty sir."
"You always have preferred the company of plants and flowers over hobbits" Frodo told him fondly. "Sam it's too cold to be out here. Come inside." Sam began to protest but Frodo continued
"Please Sam!" he begged. "Bilbo is busy talking to Gandalf. They'll be talking 'til the morrow. I shall be all alone and I shall be bored. Please Sam. Come and keep me company" Sam was about to point out that if he ever got bored he could return to the fireworks display, but then didn't because he thought it wasn't his place to do so.
Instead Sam let out an unusually large sigh, which Frodo took as a 'yes.' Frodo burst into a wide smile before literally pulling Sam through the door, sitting him down at the table and started to fix him up something to eat and drink.
"What are you doing? Sir, I should be doing that for you." Sam rose out of his seat but Frodo sat him straight back down again, placing the soda bread and mug of water at Sam's place before sitting down opposite him. Sam was still unwilling to settle though.
"I really should be tending to the garden sir."
"You shall do no such thing Sam! That's an order! Now tuck in"
Sam looked down at the soda bread. He hadn't eaten all day and it did look incredibly tempting. "Alright Mister Frodo. You win." Sam sighed rather reluctantly. "I shall be staying to eat but then I really must return to work". Frodo nodded sincerely even though he had other plans for after supper.
Sam tucked into the bread, Frodo watching him. Frodo had eaten at the party so he wasn't hungry but poor Sam hadn't eaten all day, and he probably wouldn't have done if Frodo hadn't interfered. Sam deserved to enjoy his food and if seeing him do so made Frodo feel happy, well that was just an added bonus.
"Mister Frodo?" Sam was trying speaking with his mouth full, which amused Frodo. "Why did you leave the firework display? It was all you could talk about for weeks!"
"I decided that it wasn't all that interesting after all. It seemed pointless. I just kept thinking about-" Frodo cut himself of before he could finish his sentence. "So where were you Sam?" Sam was aware he'd already answered his master's question and his sudden change in behavior slightly worried Sam.
"I was here sir. Well, in your garden. The plants and flowers were looking a bit thirsty." Frodo continued to look at him, as if he didn't believe Sam's story.
"You know I don't like crowds Mister Frodo. But I ..." Sam trailed off, shaking his head in shame and his feature bore a distinct look of sorrow as if he was thinking about something sad that had happened in his past. Frodo felt a lurch in his stomach connected with Sam's look of regret. Sam continued, "I don't ... like... fireworks"
Sam didn't look at Frodo; he couldn't bear to. Nobody had ever heard of a hobbit that didn't like fireworks! It was just another thing that made him different. Another reason he didn't have any true friends, apart from Mister Frodo of course.
It wasn't until a few minutes of silence later that Sam realized that his best friend was concerned about him. Sam put on his best fake smile for his best true friend, but Frodo wasn't fooled.
"Why don't you like fireworks?" Frodo asked softly. Frodo couldn't bear it when Sam reflected upon the unhappy times of his childhood. It wasn't right! It wasn't fair!
Sam once told Frodo that he was only ever truly happy was when he was with Frodo, or working in the gardens. Frodo knew what he meant because he himself was only ever truly happy when he was with Bilbo or reading and of course when he was with Sam. That brought Frodo back to reality, realizing he hadn't received an answer from Sam yet.
"Sam?" He prompted causing Sam to come out of his own deep, sad thoughts and quickly look at Frodo before continuing to stare at the floor.
"It's nothing!" Sam muttered. A long silence followed. "It's ridiculous! It's stupid!" Sam despised himself for getting so upset about something that happened just under a decade ago.
"It's not stupid to you Sam. And therefore it isn't stupid to me"
"Promise you won't laugh?" Frodo didn't speak, as he didn't think he would be able to do so in his normal carefree voice. He settled for giving Sam his most honest look before slowly nodding his promise.
Sam laughed bitterly and Frodo's heart filled with sadness for he knew that although he wouldn't, couldn't laugh at or judge Sam he knew he couldn't prevent Sam from judging himself.
"Come." Frodo whispered, his voice sounding constricted and choked. He cleared his throat before continuing. "It's too cold here. We can finish our conversation by the fire."
"But I haven't finished-" Sam looked down to find his plate empty; he picked up his mug to find it void of water. He had no time to contemplate this though for Frodo took him by the hand and led him to the fire where they both sat on the floor, facing opposite each other.
"Mister Frodo sir. I have not told any living thing this before. Not a soul! For if they knew I still had nightmares about that night they would-" Sam broke off, unshed tears in his eyes.
Frodo moved closer to Sam, close enough so their knees were touching. He placed a hand upon Sam's shoulder as a sign of understanding, friendship and support. This gave Sam the strength he needed to continue.
"I was about ... nine years old when one of the hobbits from the Shire (I don't recall her name) told me there would be a fireworks display. A wizard was holding the display. It was going to be real spectacular like. But I didn't fancy for it all much then either.
"So instead I decided to tend to the garden. My own garden. My... Garden of Heaven... I used to call it. It was my secret. Only I ever went there. I spent most of my youth there. It was just grass to begin with but I built it up. I learnt about the gardens by me old Gaffer. I created it meself though. My favorite plants and flowers. My favorite colors and scents. It was stunning Mister Frodo. Words can do it no justice."
Suddenly Samwise began frantically searching his pockets before pulling out an ancient piece of parchment and giving it to Frodo. It was the layout for Sam's garden. So very carefully thought and obviously a nine-year-old Sam had put a lot of time and effort into it.
"I'm sorry it's so rough sir. I was just as clumsy then as I am now." Frodo shook his head but Sam didn't see the gesture. "But you get the picture. I wish I could show you it Mister Frodo. The colors were really vibrant they were, and the smell was ... heavenly."
Frodo smiled, admiring the pleasant change in his companion's attitude. Sam's eyes had lit up with enthusiasm whilst he was talking about the garden. It was like he was nine years old again. Frodo loved seeing Sam so happy. "
It sounds beautiful." Frodo replied, looking deep into the happiness in Sam's eyes.
"Oh it was, sir. It was my haven, my heaven. I spent all the time I could there. I spent some of my happiest times there." Frodo was listening intently as he pictures an nine-year-old Sam in the celestial scene. Frodo felt that Sam belonged there.
Sam loved gardening and had a really strong bond with nature, animals as well as plants. Most hobbits do but Sam was unique. He could just touch the infertile land and it would flourish with greenery. He could heal any injured animal and cure any sick plant. Sam was something special, so gentle and loving. And Sam was his friend.
"I went down to my garden on the night of the fireworks display" Sam continued. "I found several hobbits there. About five of them, all older than me by twice I daresay. Some in their early tweens, they were! They had stolen some fireworks away from the wizard. They had set them up in my garden. They were getting ready to light them when I came in" Tears were filling his eyes and his voice was choking.
"I tried to stop them, honest I did. They were stronger than me. They kept pushing me down. In the end I just ran. Ran away as fast as I could until my knees gave way and I broke into tears. That's where I stayed. I could hear the explosions, see the fire but I just stayed there. All curled up in a ball an' crying 'til I could no more. When I did get up and return the garden... there was nothing left of it. It was burnt to the ground!"
"Oh Sam!" Frodo wanted nothing more than to take Sam in his arms and comfort him yet something prevented him from doing so. Instead he could do nothing but feel helpless as he watched Sam, curled up in a ball and absentmindedly rocking back and forth. Constricted tears flowed from his eyes but Sam had a story to tell so he continued.
"The wizard found me there, in my garden... well, in the ash. He accused me of stealing the fireworks. He told me tales of what happened to hobbits such as me. He used unnatural powers to show me horrific stuff he did. It was horrible Mister Frodo!"
Frodo could resist no longer. He took Sam into his arms and comforted him as you would a small child. For that was what Sam was at this moment in time. He was just as scared and as innocent as the nine year old boy in the story.
"Sam, sweet Sam! Why didn't you tell Gandalf it wasn't you who stole those fireworks?" Frodo fought back his own tears as he watch the tears run down Sam's cheeks.
"I didn't want to be labeled a liar as well as a thief." Frodo hugged Sam tighter. His tears finally escaped, rolling down his face before settling in Sam's hair. "And I deserved it." Sam continued. "I may not have stolen those fireworks but I did let my land be destroyed. I should have stopped them! I deserve to be punished!"
Sam was no longer crying but he was still very much upset. He laid his head upon his master's chest and Frodo began stroking his hair to soothe him further.
To tell the absolute truth it was more soothing to Frodo than to Sam. Silent tears still poured from Frodo for he realized that Sam really believed he deserved to be punished. That deeply, deeply distressed Frodo to no end.
Sam suddenly pulled away from Frodo to face him.
"You didn't laugh at me sir." Sam sounded surprised but it hurt Frodo to know that his friend could possibly think that he would ever laugh at him. Frodo wiped away both their tears before answering,
"I could never laugh at you Sam. "It wasn't your fault and I won't let you go on blaming yourself. You are a good hobbit. You're the best hobbit I know and it pain me to know of the low opinions you have of yourself because they are simply not true!" Frodo kept his eye contact with Sam to let him know he wasn't lying.
"It is such a shame you don't believe me" Sam shook his head, unable to look at Frodo.
"I'm sorry sir." Frodo sighed a painful sigh.
"Oh sweet Sam, you don't have to be sorry. You just have to trust me. You do trust me, don't you?" Sam nodded eagerly,
"With my life, sir"
"Then trust me now Sam, when I say you are a good hobbit. I'm telling you no lies there. You are a good hobbit, the best ... even if you do fail to see it" Sam nodded gently and Frodo held him tight.
"I will get you that garden Samwise. And it will be yours. Only yours."
"And yours Mister Frodo. It would belong to you too."
"I'm giving it to you Sam. You can have time off tending to Bag End's gardens and spend some time there. You deserve it. All to yourself."
"You could... visit. It does belong to you sir, and frankly I don't think it would be the same as my childhood. Before I wanted to hide in my garden, the only place I felt safe. Now... it would feel more pleasant if I was sharing it with my best friend"
Frodo smiled, knowing how much it meant for Sam to share his childhood with him. The garden was Sam's second home, and now it would be Frodo's.
The room was silent as they both bathed in their own happiness and fond memories. They both felt their friendship had grown stronger that night. None of them wanted it to end.
"I best be heading of back home now Mister Frodo." Sam muttered rather reluctantly.
"You can sleep here tonight. In front of the fire. We can talk some more. Please stay." Sam nodded before putting stoking up the fire.
So they stayed there, talking for hours on end: Reliving childhood memories and confessing all kinds of secrets. But they also listened for sometime to the party and the fireworks outside.