Disclaimer: I don't own FY. Nor do I hate Tomo.

A/N: I wrote this poem in English class and finally finished it! Enjoy!

Tomo, you know

You're a cackling queer

Who creates illusions

That strike people with fear.

You could scare an elephant

By presenting a mouse;

The Wicked Witch of the East

By making a house.

You could induce fear

In some teenage girls

Whose hair frames their faces

In a number of curls

By showing their boyfriends

And them in a break-up

If they weren't first scared

By your use of make-up.

No offence, but the long

Feathers which adorn your crown,

Along with your make-up,

Make you look like a clown.

And your annoying laugh, your

"Ke, ke, ke, ke!"

Is not as formidable

As you would say.

In fact, I tell you,

It's when you laugh when

You sound like a sort of

Insane, rabid hen

Who clucks and cackles

As she scrapes at the ground

Before eating some

Magical bean that she's found

Which makes her explode

To make way for

The beanstalk which leads to

The Sky Giants ground floor.

And hens can't get rabies

As I'm well aware.

I have poetic license, so

Get out of my hair!

Speaking of hair, yours is

Shiny as a goat

Wrapped in cellophane

And put on a boat.

And it's ever so long

Several feet or so.

Something could live there

And you'd never know.

And it's so very black

Like a really deep mote

But it's more like the color

Of a black overcoat.

I advise you to avoid

Seafood restaurants when

You're hungry, as

It might offend Shen.

Are you quite aware,

If you're not a gazelle,

That the kanji in Tomo

Suit you quite well?

"Despicable" is

Your name's translation.

I think of it every time

We've a confrontation.

This poem is what some

Think of you, Tomo.

You'll forever be known

As Tomo the Homo!