THE DIALOGUE EXERCISE by Ster Julie

DISCLAIMER: Don't own Trek. Wish I did. It may own ME, however...

Characters: McCoy, Uhura

Rating: PG

Genre: Dramedy

Setting: Post-"The Trouble With Tribbles"

A bit of nonsense to prove that I can SO do the assignments I give to others! ;P

"What are you doing?"

"Oh, Doctor! You startled me!"

"That was obvious. Honestly, Uhura, I've never seen you look so..."

"So what?"

"Well, so guilty. So, I repeat. What are you doing?"

"Nothing, Doctor McCoy."

"Now, don't 'nothing' me. And you can stop batting those eyelashes at me. I can feel the breeze 'way over here. What's that behind your back?"

"Oh. This?"

"Yes, this, Lieutenant."

"Hey, give that back!"

"What do you need with one of my specimen cases?"

"I need it."

"For what?"

"For..."

"Are you blushing?"

"I don't need to tell you anything, except that I need it. A real Southern gentleman would know not to question a lady so!"

"Appealing to my honor as an officer and a gentleman doesn't count when you're stealing my equipment."

"I'm not stealing. I am borrowing. You would have it back...eventually."

"Uhura, what possible use do you have of one of my specimen cases? I see those wheels churning. Take your time. This should be good."

"Well, you can just uncross your arms and pass on by, Doctor McCoy. I merely needed something deep enough to rinse out a few unmentionables."

"What's wrong with your sink?"

"Don't give me that smug look, sir! My sink happens to be full of other unmentionables. I've gotten behind on my laundry."

"What a load of cockamamie... Wait. What was that?"

"What was what?"

"That trilling sound. There it is again."

"I don't hear anything, Doctor."

"Then you're either deaf or a damn liar."

"Doctor McCoy! I'll just be leaving. I don't need to stay here and be insulted."

"There it is again. Lieutenant, when did you grow that third breast?"

"Doctor McCoy! Well, I never..."

"I knew I knew that sound. You don't need the specimen case for any laundry. You're harboring a tribble, aren't you? Get back here! Aren't you?"

"Unhand me, sir! Hey! Give that back!"

"Lieutenant, you know what we just went through with these things."

"But I know not too feed it too much. It won't multiply like before!"

"You don't know that for certain. I'm sorry, but I'll have to confiscate this tribble. Now, don't start crying."

"Y-you're not going to kill it, are you?"

"I'll just put it in stasis until we can get to FIZ."

"You're sending it to the Federation Interplanetary Zoo? Oh, that's nice. I loved to go to FIZ when I was a young. Are—are you kissing my hand?"

"You are still young, dear Miss Uhura. Thank you for relinquishing this critter. He... She... It will have a good home. You just skedaddle now, and go finish your laundry. You won't be needing this anymore."

"Oh, yes. Here's your specimen case. Thank you, Doctor."

"Don't mention it, Lieutenant. Goodbye... I thought she'd never leave. Hey, Fizz! Shhh! Stop trilling so loud! Ol' Bones has got a new friend for you!"

FIN