A/N: I am setting this up as a new story and a continuing chapter of Forget Me Not. This takes place after my Forget Me Not Series. Faith and Spike are having the kind of fun only they can have at Angel's Wolfram & Hart beach house after she gave up her Slayer power to save his life. Buffy is crashing at Giles's house trying to recover from being dragged out of yet another dimension. She wants to make sure she is happy before she lets everyone know she is back, but can she do that? Faith's ex, Robin Wood has his powerful Adoptive Gramps crashing the High School basement. Wood finds himself crashing someone else's party.

Thanks to Dutch and Jill and everyone for the feed back!

Story Notes: This takes place after my Forget Me Not Series. I tried to make it so you could read it from this point on. But of course if you want to read the rest no one is stopping you :)

Same as it ever was

“Giles, how old do I look?” Buffy asked as she looked in Giles’s decorative mirror.

She didn’t think she looked any older, but it was hard to say. Maybe you didn’t age here if you were there (married to Angel they told her, but she remembered none of it.)

“Hmmm?” he asked.

“How old do I look?” she asked.

“You look like any girl in her twenties,” he answered.

He was looking down at his papers again. Maybe it wasn’t because he thought what she was asking was boring; maybe it was because she didn’t look like just any girl in her twenties. If anyone knew that she wasn’t just like any girl in her twenties, it was Giles. Giles who had been living in London these past two years with Olivia in shacked-up bliss.

Even Giles had found someone. Buffy was in her cookie dough stage, and she realized now she just lost two years of baking time. This next birthday she’d be twenty... no, not that old, not yet! Yes, not yet, but that old soon. Buffy had lost two years in this world where she was pretty sure she was about to be the oldest living Slayer. She wasn’t sure how old the oldest one had been. She just knew making it to twenty-five was a really big deal.

“Yes, but twenty-what? Twenty-one, Twenty-three, Twenty-twenty-five?” she asked as she pulled her cheeks back.

“I can’t say. You look your age,” Giles said.

She didn’t feel like it. She felt like she wanted to sit here with Olivia and Giles and have the peaceful silence that she remembered having in her house when her mother and father were together…twenty years ago! No, Buffy didn’t feel her age, she felt old, and yet she wanted to sit here with Giles and his girlfriend, who wasn’t old enough to be her mother. It was time to get back to…what had she been doing before? Oh yeah, the last battle with the First Evil. Before that? Guidance Councilor, but she had only landed that job due to the last battle with the First Evil. Buffy wasn’t really doing that well at the adult thing before the end of the world came. She’d rather have the end of the world. She was good at that.

“I’ll have to go back to Sunnydale soon. They’ll need my help with the Hellmouth open again,” Buffy sighed.

“As soon as you feel you are ready,” Giles said.

He looked up from his papers when he said it.

“You do look a bit young in my baggy clothes. It’s because you’re so tiny. The boutiques in London make clothes for little girls just like you. Ripper, we should go shopping and get her some clothing that actually fits, don’t you think?” Olivia said.

Buffy was positive she loved Olivia. Of course, Giles would object. He would say something about her wasting perfectly good money on ridiculous fashions, which she might actually do now, since she had no idea what was going on with fashion now. Giles would be right. She couldn’t afford to spend her time here, watching someone else’s TV and spending their money, like she was some teenager on summer vacation. She’d have to go back to the mortgage, the Hellmouth and Dawn. Dawn was a senior now! Buffy tried to think of her as looking older, and she found she couldn’t bear it. Buffy felt Giles looking at her, and she quickly smiled. Had she looked upset? She swore she was not upset. This was not Buffy being ripped out of Heaven Part II. She did feel alive, just out of place. What else was new?

“No, but thank you,” Buffy said, “I couldn’t take your money. I have to get back to my life—my responsibilities. Clothes and how I look should be the last thing on my mind. My little sister is living on a mouth of Hell, and she has to worry about who'sgoing to ask her to the Prom.”

“This is actually the perfect time---“Giles began.

“To go back, I know. I wonder if she likes anyone, if she has had any boyfriends. I-I can’t believe I wasn’t there,” Buffy said.

“—to go shopping,” Giles finished, “Things are well. The Hellmouth is guarded. Faith and Spike are out of danger, and Dawn has had a few dates, but no serious boyfriends. She’s spent most of this secondary school year studying the occult with Willow and my help via the Internet. She spends a lot of time with that Amanda girl, the only Sunnydale Potential. Do you remember her? She is quite bright. I knew when she played D and D that she—Well; I think she is a good influence on Dawn.”

“I-I remember her,” Buffy said as she felt her face drain.

“I didn’t mean to upset you, Buffy. If something was wrong with Dawn I would have returned to America immediately. I hope you know that I left America to help you be able to be independent. I sometimes regret---“Giles sounded too pained for Buffy to let this go on.

“No, Giles,” Buffy said, “It isn’t you. It’s me. I-I thought Amanda was one of the girls that died. I think I got her mixed up with one of the other girls. There were just so many of them that died and so many of them that left right away to find their families after.”

Buffy sighed; okay, maybe she was kind of depressed. She couldn’t even keep track of her army. She thought that was the one thing she was good at. Now this girl was Dawn’s best friend and it seemed Giles knew her a lot more than Buffy did.

“So, Amanda moved back to Sunnydale after Spike rose up with the town, and you say this girl is smart?” Buffy managed to smile.

“Well, you remember how all the real estate resurrected with the town,” Giles smiled, “Her family wouldn’t get the earthquake insurance money, and they would have the impossible task of selling Sunnydale real estate.”

“Sunnydale Real Estate? I think that is actually the name of a band. It's gotta be a depressing band,” Buffy said.

“They’re actually called Sunnyday Real Estate. They are a very influential post-punk band. They are nothing compared to their predecessors of course. Perhaps we can go to a record store and you can listen to them when we go shopping,” Giles said.

“Okay, who are you and what have you done with Giles?”

“Oh,” Olivia said, “There is lots to Ripper you don’t know. It’s not that he doesn’t like good music. It’s that the music he likes has to be too good. He’s a music snob.”

“It seems like there a million things about everyone I know that I don’t know. It’s why I should go back there,” Buffy said.

Or not go back. Everyone had gone on with their lives, even Spike. They would expect Buffy to not be depressed, and then they would think they could rely on her again. Buffy wanted to tell Giles she totally got why he left for England now.

“You’re right,” Giles said.

“Ah, there’s Giles. I was afraid this was some kind of bizzaro world,” Buffy said.

“But before you do go back we must—should-- fully discuss everything that has occurred, so you can prepare for what’s coming, and there is no reason why we can’t do it and then go to the shops. Of course that’s just my opinion. It’s a good day for shopping. It seems to be clearing up,” Giles said.

“Okay, maybe it’s like half-bizzaro world, but I can live with that if it means Giles wants to shop,” Buffy made herself smile.

Actually, if it were a bizzaro world it would explain why Spike had given her cab money to go to the airport to be with Giles. She had come back when Spike thought he would never see her again, and he threw money at her and ran away. Of course, that was what Buffy had asked for- the money part to go to London- not the running away part. Well, Spike did have a reason for taking off. He said he had to save Faith. That was a good thing. He also said he loved Faith, well, he didn’t deny it.

That was not a bad thing, but was it really good? It wasn’t that Buffy really cared that much. She did care very much about the saving Faith part, but Spike seemed so sure he could do it. It was the loving Faith part, could Spike really do that? Of course he could do it without Buffy being upset. She wasn’t upset. Well, she was upset she lost two years of her life in a dimension she couldn’t remember, and life here carried on without her but, Buffy wasn’t upset that Spike said he loved Faith. Or he didn’t deny it. Buffy just wondered if Spike could love Faith without something awful happening. The vampire/slayer thing didn’t seem to go well with Buffy. Buffy couldn’t imagine how bad it could possibly go with Faith. Buffy was an expert in how cruel Faith could be. She wasn’t going to put up with a love sick vamp beyond occasionally giving him grindage , even if he did have a soul. People could end up hurt, or dead, or soulless.

“So, tell me about all the misadventures of Spike and Faith on the Hellmouth. How the hell did it manage to open up again right under their noses? They probably just welcomed the smell of more fight,” Buffy smiled.

She admired both Spike and Faith’s bring-it-on attitude. So what if they were too busy fighting to notice something like the Hellmouth opening again. At least fighting was what Buffy hoped was keeping them busy- and by that she didn’t mean fighting with each other. Oh boy.

“Actually, Spike has been training quite hard with Faith over all this time. It seems she became quite disciplined with him,” Giles said.

“Faith may have wanted to become something with Spike, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t disciplined,” Buffy scoffed.

“What? Are you referring to the Rhoshobi Joining Prophecy?” Giles asked.

“The who-what prophecy?” Buffy asked.

“The Rhoshobi Joining Prophecy,” Giles said again.

All Buffy recognized was the word prophecy. That was never a good word except when it had the word Sanshu before it, and even that was kind of a mixed bag.

“Ungh!” Buffy groaned and sunk down on the couch.

“You said Faith wanted to become something with Spike, and that was a theory we had for the prophecy, that Faith would somehow change when Spike’s soul was burned into her. Many theorists feared that because she had also taken more of the Slayer demon’s power from the shadow dimension she would become an entity with the power of a vampire’s soul. Of course, from what we know in the past, this amount of demon inside a Slayer would make them mad with power,” Giles said.

“What? Faith is evil again? She went to those Shadow guys and got more demon power! The funny thing is I’m actually surprised. I thought she had changed. Why are we just sitting here?” Buffy demanded.

“Didn’t Spike talk to you about what was happening?” Giles asked.

He didn’t seem concerned. Neither did Olivia who seemed to know shopping was on hold and went back to her computer, and barely looked up when Buffy said the word “evil.”

“He said that Faith was in trouble, she was down on her Slayer power due to Wes doing something and that she went off with Angel, but Spike needed to find her. He said not to worry about it. He said he had it under control,” Buffy told Giles.

Then, Spike kissed her or she kissed him and there was crying and hugging. He said he loved her. Spike said he loved Buffy, but then he didn’t deny that he loved Faith. How had that even come up? Buffy brought it up. Somehow she had known. She couldn’t remember how. Spike always made everything into a whirlwind. Of course, he wouldn’t mention some doom prophecy, or that Faith wanted to steal his soul, or that Faith had become some evil being because she went to the Shadow guys for more power. So, now Faith was doing that whole mad with power thing again, and she was trying to take yet another vampire’s soul. With all this Spike couldn’t say he didn’t love the crazy bitch? Maybe he really was just in love with pain.

“Spike? Under control?” Buffy laughed now, “Why in God’s name did I believe him? Can we just chalk this one up to inter-dimensional jet-lag stupidity? Well, c’mon, Giles. There is no way I’m letting Spike and Angel handle this alone, even if they could. Angel will probably feel too guilty to do anything to Faith because of that whole saving his soul thing, and Spike told me he…We totally can’t rely on Spike when it comes to Faith anymore. He’d probably die before he’d hurt her now. To think before I left he would have kil--“

“You’re right; Spike was going to die to save Faith. But she-“

“--became evil again because she couldn’t resist the idea of getting more Slayer power from the Shadow guys, and she wants to steal Spike’s soul. Okay, I get the gist. Why are we standing here and not packing, and by we I mean you. Ya know sweaters, weapons, and books like: ‘Fifty ways to get your soul back & how to put a crazy Slayer in one of those X-men super-strength jails.’”

“Buffy, you’re misunderstanding the situation. It is under control. Spike’s soul is fine” Giles said firmly.

“Please don’t tell me you went behind my back and you have some plan to kill Faith,” Buffy said as she stormed into the guest room for her stuff.

Then, she realized she had no stuff, only the clothes she came in when she realized she was standing on her old grave.

“Ha!” Olivia said.

Buffy couldn’t tell if Olivia was laughing at what Buffy had just said or if she was laughing at her email. Maybe Giles always has plans to kill people he thinks will go crazy and start killing people. Thank God Buffy was back.

“Good lord, Buffy! No,” Giles said as he followed her, “I just received my most recent report yesterday, and Faith is fine, though she seems to be keeping questionable company, like some other people we know. However, for now all is quiet. There is no cause for alarm. If you’d like to go back to America to see everyone feel free, but you needn’t invent an explanation of urgency to spare my feelings, or should I say hurt them. How could you think I would--”

“Huh? I wasn’t inventing any urgency,” Buffy said, “You were telling with the urgency.”

“Oh please, Ripper. You tried to have the girl’s lover murdered while you distracted her with another tedious lesson. What is she supposed to think?” Olivia called from the living room.

“You make me sound like I’m some character from a Greek Tragedy. He was a vampire, a very dangerous vampire, who had an uncontrollable time bomb in his head!” Giles called to Olivia.

“Then why do you tell me how much you regretted it? Didn’t the vampire save the world?” Olivia called to Giles.

“Just go back illegally getting music or whatever it is you do on that box!” Giles said back to her.

“Hello, Giles, urgency of evil!” Buffy said, “Faith and a prophecy and a vamp I lo- look to for back up losing his soul. Hey, it’s like fashion. When my life runs out of ways to suck it recycles itself with a new twist. We never had all three of these before, and the gang won’t even have time to be weirded out or stressed about me being back. We’ll just have to jump in and deal with all of this.”

“Buffy, I’m sure everyone will be as thrilled as I am that you are back with us, and that has nothing to do with your abilities as a Slayer, which you don’t need to use currently. Faith is not evil, and Spike indeed has his soul. You see, these past two years each of them had side effects- Faith from taking in the Shadow Demon, Spike from, well you know, dying to save the world and resurrecting,” Giles explained.

“Oh yeah, that. I remember resurrecting after you saved the world can make you a little mopey with upset stomach and diarrhea. What does helping yourself to more of your share of Slayer Demon get you? Dry mouth?” Buffy asked.

Great, so Faith was still all, or mostly, good, but really, what was she thinking taking in that demon from those guys? It was so obviously a bad idea. Of course, something bad was happening to Faith because she had wanted more power. She took in a demon. What did she expect? Spike, on the other hand, had saved the world, and it insisted he come back to life, Buffy had to feel for him.

“The demon inside Faith was killing her. Spike, somehow, had the power to burn his soul into Faith, so the demon presence wouldn’t kill her, but that was killing him. When Faith realized this she fled with Angel to—“

“—save Spike’s life. But, that means that she’d die,” Buffy realized.

She felt guilty, like someone caught her in a lie.

“Yes, but Spike was able to save her,” Giles said.

“You said he was okay,” Buffy said suspiciously, “So, what is he, a ghost or something? Because that’s not okay in my book. He’d hate that. It would kill him.”

“No, he’s fine, Buffy, though still a vampire—with a soul,” Giles told her.

“Okay, I know how these things work. How are they both alive?” Buffy demanded.

“Well, there are theories. One is that of a telekinetic barrier and auto-exorcism due to extreme adrenalin on the part of Faith, but I favor the metaphysical neutralization reaction theory that Faith would have also have had to been a catalyst for,” Giles said.

“So, in non-occult-think-too-much-speak that means that Faith did something—something that made it so they both could live,” Buffy said.

She felt embarrassed. Buffy had been angry at Faith again. She was sure that when Spike saved her he had sacrificed something, but it seems like Faith had saved them both. That only meant that Faith had sacrificed something. Something big.

“What did Faith give up, Giles? What was the price?” Buffy asked.

She felt a little sick. Giles wouldn’t lie to her, not completely. He said that Faith was alive, but Buffy couldn’t help but picture her in another coma.

“Well, nothing really. She already had the spell done removing most of the shadow demon, she just had to loose the remainder of it. So, she--”

“A spell! Faith had Wes do a spell so she could save Spike, and stop being a Slayer—for good! God, I figured when Spike said Wes did something that made Faith powerless she was only temporarily not a Slayer ” Buffy swallowed, “ I figured Wes did to Faith what you did to me when you took my powers that time…only Faith had the luxury of being in the know.”

“Yes, well,” Giles sighed, “Don’t get me started on the Wyndam Pryce’s methods of ‘caution.’ The mistakes I’ve made as your Watcher pale in comparison to—“

“It was what Faith wanted,” Buffy said, even though she couldn’t believe it, “I have to go back and help her, talk to her. She doesn’t know I’m here. She must be so—“

“ If you care about what I think, I feel you deserve some time off after being—“

“Us Slayers, never seem to get what we deserve, though do we?” Buffy said quietly.

“There is little you can do now, Buffy. You should stay here with me until your ready…At least that’s what I think. You can stay here for as long or as short as you like,” Giles said.

She knew he wasn’t talking about the Hellmouth. He wasn’t even talking about Sunnydale, or being dragged out of yet another dimension, he was talking about change.

“How can I? I know there is Spike, but Faith isn’t a Slayer anymore.” Buffy said it again and it sounded strange.

She never thought she would be saying that. She probably thought it was more likely she’d be saying that Faith was dead. She couldn’t deny she thought it was more likely she’d be saying that Faith was evil again. When Spike had said whatever he had said about Faith having no power it never occurred to Buffy that what he was talking about was anything different from the temporary lapse of power she herself had experienced. Faith wasn’t the kind of person that was going to adjust to this sacrifice easily.

“Yes, but we don’t know what potential Faith has. She seems quite dedicated, that I know from Dawn,” Giles said.

“Dawn,” Buffy said hearing her voice get higher, “Faith has been with Dawn this whole time I was away. She has been a good Slayer. She didn’t have to stay in Sunnydale. I have to go and help her, Giles.”

“She has Spike to help her, not to mention Willow and a new fighter. She’s secure for now,” Giles said.

“Yeah that’s easy for you to say, you’ve never had your power taken away and suddenly been a five foot girl with nothing but—What? A new fighter? What new fighter?” Buffy asked.

“His background is a little questionable, but--”

“A guy? Is he a demon? He’s not one of those Immortal guys, is he? Because the Mayor was one of those and he became the big snake,” Buffy told Giles, even though she knew he knew.

“He has a soul. That much I know,” Giles said.

“Oh, well that can’t hurt. So, is he human? Is he cute?” Buffy asked.

“That I don’t know. Willow never told me and she is my main source of information on the boy. He seems very loyal to Faith. If you promise to drop it for the moment, we can go to the shops,” Giles sighed.

“Well, I guess I’ll have to give Willow a call to find out about everything. She—she’ll be able to handle it. Me being back. She’ll understand if I want to stay here in England with you. But I don’t think I can,” Buffy told Giles, “I mean Faith, no Slayer power. I can imagine how depressed she is. I mean, when I lost my powers I was more than a little wigged. But Faith, being a Slayer, power, it’s her whole thing. She won’t know who she is without it. Meanwhile, here’s Buffy totally thinking she went all evil again. She probably feels totally alone and miserable. She doesn’t know how to be powerless.”

“I think I know how to do this,” Faith said.

Her lip was twisted in determination, her eyes were utterly focused on the handcuffs Spike had placed her lightly in. She looked at just the lock. Her sparkling russet pupils narrowed in on it, then, they widened to look over at Spike. Her eyes could hold a life time of joy in a second. Perhaps, one needed superhuman reflexes to catch everything her eyes said. They flashed it all so quick, and they were constantly changing. Maybe her eyes weren’t changing so much as it was all one truth, but Spike was just a man, he had to break up what they showed him into pieces otherwise they would overwhelm him. Her eyes were now back to being part of the determined girl.

She took a bent tiny paper clip into her mouth, and brought it to the handcuffs that were around her wrists. She stuck the paper clip in the lock hole. As Spike watched her work her mouth with her wrists bound he began to wonder why they weren’t making love here on this huge brass bed. True, the bed wasn’t theirs. It belonged to The Evil incorporated that Angel had gotten his ass bound up in, but proper ownership had never stopped Spike from pleasing his girl.

Then he remembered, he had handcuffed her because she kept distracting him from the job he set out to do. All he wanted to do was settle his mouth between her legs for as long as she could possibly stand, but her bad little hands and arms kept distracting him, blinding him with pleasure and such. So, the handcuffs were a good find, and fixed the problem. The pleasure became deafening instead of blinding when he cuffed her to whatever it was that had been handy outside the bathroom they were trying to clean. That was all he wanted for the morning , to listen to her and feel her pleasure. Of course, she had the best sultry moans with that throaty voice she had, but what the average person might not know is she also had quite the shriek. When she was done with all that she whispered something, hiding her eyes. She said it had been “wicked mean” of him to make her remember that she couldn’t bust through handcuffs by dangling the thing in front of her that she wanted most—to touch him. That was when he had opened his big gob and said something about how he knew how to open handcuffs without powers, and how it would be a good thing for her to learn- some time.

So, this is how he ended up in such situations. Naked with the woman he loved doing a training exercise. Spike wasn’t an idiot. He knew that Faith was the most dogged girl in all the world, and that sacrificing her Slayer power would only make her train harder, and he would be along for the ride posing as some kind of guide. He just thought that maybe she would want to take a complete vacation until they got back to home sweet Hellmouth, but of course Faith could never really rest entirely. He had just had to handcuff her to do it, hadn’t he?

Spike settled up behind her. He felt the sunlight on her back as he moved his hand lightly over it. She had suggested they move in here because this room had a sky light, and she wanted him to experience all the sunlight he could. Yes, she really wanted him to take advantage of this special glass Evil Incorporated designed so blood sucking murderers like him could go about and do business for them in the daytime. Of course, she wasn’t thinking of it like that. She only thought about the present, the simple joy he could gain from being here. He didn't give a toss about sunlight. He just wanted to be with her, but he was starting to see how she looked in the sunlight now, how she enjoyed it, and he did enjoy it. He would follow her example and take nothing for granted. He hooked his chin over her shoulder as it was busy moving to open the handcuffs.

“That’s it twirl it ‘round. Don’t be afraid to use your tongue,” he said.

Faith laughed and the wire fell out of her mouth.

“Fuck!” she snapped, “You did that on purpose.”

She leaned back on him. Her back was a bundle of sunlit warmed meat, bone, and energy.

“Did what? I’m helping. Wasn’t this my idea?” he said.

“No, it wasn’t. I was the one that wanted to use them to learn how to be a self sufficient damsel, you just wanted the played out damsel in distress,” she said.

“It didn’t seem like you were in distress to me,” he said as he nuzzled her neck.
He felt her loosen as she exhaled. She leaned all of her weight on his chest. He smelled a new shot of desire pour out of her after he spoke.

“Are you sure you found these here, or do you just carry them around in case a kink session breaks out?” she pulled up her body to turn to him.

She was back at the handcuffs now. He knew he could probably seduce her into another round, but she would tire and be distressed that she couldn’t put her hands everywhere. He decided that he had bound her up enough for now. He’d rather watch her wrestle with the handcuffs.

“I swear, I found them when I was looking for towels after we broke the tub,” he said.

“Yeah, I didn’t know you could break a tub. Leave it to you,” she said with the wire in her mouth again.

“Me? It was your fault!” he said as he flopped his lower half on the bed.

“How could it be my fault? The only things I can break now are my own bones,” she said.

“Not quite. All the damage done was your fault. You made me do it, with all the things you did to me. Your roar is nothing but passion, but you have quite the little skilled claws,” he said.

He really didn’t know how she did it. It had to be like rubbing your stomach, patting your head, and screaming in glee all at once. She had been in the tub shaking under him, and shaking him. It was when she seemed to only be able to take him, she gave, by working her little fingers in the best of places. It had made him kick at the tub faucet, which had been surprisingly weak for a pipe in a place like this.

“Really?” she smiled, turning to him as she had the paper clip wire settled in the lock now.

“Let me put it this way. I trashed a house shagging before, but it was already condemned. It never had a chance. Without you, I could never have made a dent in this sodding palace. Together we could probably rip out the foundation this place stands on,” he said.

Her eyes flashed at him: lust, happiness, pride. She loved compliments when they were dressed right. Then her eyes ached. There was always some aching. Before he could think much about it she kissed him, drinking his mouth in. He went to put his arms around her but she had already broken away and was back at the handcuffs

“Mmm,” she sighed as she jiggled the paper clip wire with her mouth, “Well, we can’t do that. We gotta be careful. Angel would kill us. He’s probably gonna bitch slap us already for the bathroom thing.”

“You think this place really belongs to Angel? Try it the other way, love They pulled his strings, and the walls will come tumbling down and the machine will collect his blood to keep running,” he scoffed.

“You don’t really think that.” she said out of the side of her mouth like when she talked with a cigarette in it.

She rolled her eyes after her forehead creased in concern.
He’d have to go out for more smokes soon. Faith had long run out. He was surprised he hadn’t thought of it until now.

“Like hell I don’t. I’ve been saying it since the beginning, and you know it too. You know a life like this doesn’t come for free,” he said.

Of course she knew. It was just too hard for her to think about Angel in the belly of the beast. He was the great hero after all. Spike found he really didn’t mind. He couldn’t imagine being Faith’s hero, up in some murky tower. Spike was the one Faith really wanted on the ground with her, and Spike knew all too well it was better to be in reach.

“This place is filled with trophies. Whose handcuffs do you think those are? Whose bubble bath? Whose sexy little useless undergarments? Whose bloody awful CDs and trashy novels? They’re all past victims of the Evil Incorporated who thought this was their house to holiday in,” Spike said as he watched Faith work on the handcuffs.
He was trying to be gentle about it, but he knew he had to get her ready for whatever price the big poof was going to pay for going corporate.
“Fuck,” she sneered at the handcuffs, “I bit my lip. I don’t think you realize how lucky you are, Billy boy.”

Faith glanced at him as if he were an amusing pet, but then looked back at her bound wrists ruefully.

“Oh, of course I do, love! To be here with you on holiday after I was supposed to die for you is the best thing to happen to me yet, and I’ve been alive a while. I know I’m the luckiest man alive, but being able to crash in some bloody greenhouse has nothing to do with it. It’s the company,” he said.

He got up off the bed and tried to catch her eye as she worked the wire with the handcuffs.
“That’s not why you’re lucky,” she laughed, “See, you don’t even know. You always have control of your demon. Even if you were someone’s bitch it was because you wanted it that way. You call the shots—you got the soul. The rest of us—not so lucky. Our demon gets the better of us and we have to back-petal. You don’t know how close I came to being a junior what-ever-they-call-em’ at W&H. At least Angel did it in a way where he’s in control. I’d have totally fucked it,” she said.

“From what I heard the only thing you were trying to fuck was yourself.” he said, “I don’t think you took the job of trying to off Peaches from Evil inc. to get the corner office. I think you thought it was a suicide mission.”

“Nah,” she grinned, her eyes flashing horrible pain at him, “I’m not that deep. You’re the one that went to get a soul. Me I-I had one and I wanted to hurt Angel.”

“Are you kidding? My deepest plans and thoughts were all around trying to hurt Angel. It’s a real thinker’s hobby. Most of my plans just ended up with the big poof dead, but you-you had a whole life plan worked out, no matter how it went. I don’t really see you as the yuppie type though, you’d get sick of all their memos that you could only show your tattoo and bludgeon people in the common area on casual Fridays.”

“No, that’s the thing. I’d sell out. I’d have stayed with them. I figured they were the real power, and if I stayed with the real power, joined up with it, I’d be safe. The only reason I didn’t is ‘cause of Angel,” she said all of this as if she were talking about what they would have for dinner, between working the wire with her mouth in the handcuffs.

“No!” he grumbled, “You’re the reason you’re not a bloody sell-out, not Angel. You were the one that decided to go to the clink and spend all that time alone. I don’t know how you managed it. I’d have gone mad by myself like that inside those walls. At least when I had the chip I could go where I wanted. True, all I could do was annoy people, but it turned out to be a worthwhile pass time.”

“Don’t talk about that chip,” she closed her eyes as if the chip was buzzing in her head, “I liked jail. I was safe from myself and from people doing things to me because of what I was—things like the chip. I was never alone. I had the company of about two thousand other chicks, and Angel visited me, so he did more than decide not to kill me. He brought me popcorn and drew me pictures for my wall.”

Spike didn’t know whether to roll his eyes or wipe tears from them. Angel brought her popcorn and drawings when she needed—no deserved—intense care! Someone had given her five dollars worth of their money and a few hours of their time after she had tried to hurt them, and she thought that made them a hero. Spike had hurt Buffy and she had given him so much more than that. Again, he realized that taking Angel down from his pedestal would be like taking out a piece of the sky to Faith. He’d have to be careful not to do that, but he wouldn’t let Faith’s belief in Angel interfere with her belief in herself. The poof wasn’t some old testament God that she could never live up to. Angel was someone Faith had surpassed in saving people.

“The reason I’m in the light isn’t because of this sodding house that Angel or anyone else sold themselves to,” he said as he knelt down by her lap and put his hand in it.

“I’ve gone to the light for love before, but it burned bloody awful. I’m not saying I would have done it any different, but I thought it had to burn—had to hurt. But with you, light just feels good. I think it’s because you never tried to hide your dark. You glow just right—not too blinding. I can see it all. It really makes you the most beautiful creature to look at in sunlight like this. It kind of does hurt to look at something so perfectly effulgent. You’re eyes are like living stained glass, and it does hurt to know I can only see that in a place like this.”

“Boy, have you got the wrong girl,” she cackled and was the one that rolled her eyes after touching her handcuffed hands briefly with his.

“That all sounded like some Shakespeare thing. I did the plays in prison ‘cause I was bored, but I never knew what half that shit meant. It’s wasted on me, and I’ m no angel. If you’re right about W and H, I obviously have no problem using all their shi--”

“The only thing that’s wasted on you is all this bloody self doubt, and I’m right sick of it!” he snapped, but he did it too loudly.

It startled her. It was something he'd begun to notice, and probably one would only notice if one had studied Faith for two years and had super senses like him. She had jerked back just a little and frowned after the fear flashed in her eyes. Then she quickly laughed at him and drew her head towards him with eyes that dared him to strike her. He was very familiar with that pose. It was better to demand a hit when you knew it was coming anyway, then it was you that had the control, or at least you could tell yourself that. Maybe he'd understood a little bit before, but Spike understood it all so fully now. Attacking Angel, and even Buffy, and running off to Evil Incorporated. And he was right positive that he never loved anything more than her.

“Any sod can shoot off his gob about lightness and see it, but you make me feel it,” he said quietly. “...and I really don’t believe for a minute that you didn’t know what you were doing when you went to Wolfram and bloody Hart. You’re no fool, accept when it comes to thinkin’ you should die early. You shouldn’t. You won’t.” “Maybe you're right, with the new skills I’m picking up,” she beamed a huge gleaming smile at him when she opened the handcuffs.

“Hey, you did it,” he said and put his arms around her.

He gave her little kisses on her full, smiling cheeks. She was far more surprised than he was at her success, but he wasn’t going to chastise her for being surprised. All of her successes were great gifts to her because of her surprise.
“I knew I could, if I just kept you distracted and yapping. It wasn’t that hard,” she smirked and tussled his wet twisted hair.

Yes, he had been shooting his gob off about nothing that was currently important, and she had started him on that path. He wanted to spend every second of this time on her, because God knew other things were going to sprout up, but not now. For all it’s garishness this place was a fortress of solitude. Faith had created it, no one else. She had spun gold out of evil glass. She had saved his life by turning her Slayer demon, the very thing that had been created to kill him, into a martyr for him.

“Hey, here’s a new skill to practice,” he said as he sprung up from the bed “Run away from the vampire you just brassed off.”

“Sorry, there has to be some realism in a training exercise,” she said as she slid to the other side of the bed and rose, “I’ve had your soul in me. I know what a candy ass you are. You might as well be the snuggle bear running after me, on a beautiful summer day like today. Well, okay the snuggle bear with a really…thick bundle…that he can put on the spin cycle indefinitely, but--”

“I’ll spin your ass red,” he said as he stomped to where she stood.

She was baiting him again, and this time he’d rise to it because that wasn’t fear he smelled on her now. He smacked her on the ass once, and let her run away so he could see her skin turn pink. She let out a raspy yelp, and looked over her shoulder at him with her eyes flashing a haughty startle and then desire as she ran to the other side of the bed. He was no teddy bear, he flipped on his demon face.

“You only had my soul inside you. You didn’t have the other half,” he told her stalking towards her.

“Well, we musta been donin’ somthin’ wrong then. Because I want it all,” she said licking her lips and smiling wickedly.

“Why you runnin’ then?” he said tilting his head.

His demon face took her in so brilliantly. He could see all the caramel streaks drying with the rest of her dark chocolate hair. It made wavy trails down to her large perfectly round red nipples. Her smooth stomach moved in and out with breath. Her eyes looked straight into him. They flicked impishly with awe.

“I’m not. Maybe I’m waiting to see what snuggle can do, ” she said.

He flipped the big brass bed that was between them up on to the wall. Faith’s eyes went wide as Spike grabbed her forearms and pulled her to him. Spike kissed her open mouth and felt it close around his as he heard the sound of shattering glass. Then, he twirled Faith around by her forearms while he kissed her before the bed could come crashing back down to where she had been standing.

She was gasping,breathing hard between short but deep kisses. She had locked one of her hands on the back of his neck and actually looked shocked when he encouraged her to hang all her weight on it to climb up him. He had her back up against one of the glass walls. She trembled up the glass wall and his body as his one hand slickly moved to pleasure her and the other arm lifted her up. Then he realized how badly he wanted to be inside of her as she slid down the wall, back-lit and beautiful her legs gripping his waist.

“How am I doing? Scary. Make you scream? You want growling with that. ”

His voice shook as he moved into her.

She wailed and dug her heels into his backside as it moved.

“Yeah,” she moaned, “This is the kind of talk I ge---ah! ”

“You get it all,” he said after he moved in her roughly, “You’re just afraid.”

“Keep the face,” she sputtered.

They locked hands and her silver skull ring knocked vociferously up against the glass. He growled as she kissed him, running her tongue around his pointy teeth. She bared his neck to him, and he nipped her with fangs. She roared in elation. She was trembling so violently against the window that it groaned. He slid down the window with her as he had nothing but pleasure and scattered thoughts in his mind:

Bloody good, bright, tight, bite, (don't really bite) don't hurt the girl, love, tight, happy screaming so good, so much better, so much better than killing a Slayer, more screaming, never stop the good screaming, never let her do bad screaming again, Best bad good girl, Slayer. Beautiful bright, so bright. Don't need the window. Don't need the sun. Need nothing but...Get her off of that cold hard glass, you bastard! Don't hurt the bad girl, the good girl the BEST girl.

He had them crash to the floor as he howled.

“Lose face now,” her big lips stuttered, as she lay on top of him touching his face, her finger tips tracing his wrinkles.

He shook of his demon face, and instantly roared ,jutting up into her.

“You,are awesome,” she whispered as her eyes were soft with something like amazement.

“No, that was all you. What you bring out of me,” he said as he reached up and caressed her face.

“You really aren’t human,” she beamed. “You are a phoenix, like the one in Harry Potter. You rose up from that fire and shit, so you could heal me. Show me balance. I thought—I mean I tried so hard to be alone.”

“You mean, you didn’t think you wanted the love of a creature that’s beneath you?” he asked as he held her face.

He meant what he had asked, but he wasn’t unhappy at all to ask it. Maybe it was because he had just had the shag of his life when he was sure he had already had it an hour ago. Before that he was sure he had it some three years back, and before that he was right positive he had it some 104 years ago. However, he was confident that he was happy because of the expression of the girl that sat on top of him. Her brow creased; she was confused by the question, but her big lips were still turned up. Something seemed to touch her eyes and make them shimmer. She understood the question now, she was the sharpest tool of them all. It wasn’t because she immediately understood it all, it was how fast, how willing, she was to work out what she didn’t understand.

“No,” she said, “I wanted to give it, to give to you. Someone, anyone, who wanted. I never even thought about anyone—anyone so like you.”

He could hear her heart racing as if she were afraid. She trembled slightly as she gently fell on to his chest. He could hear something building up in her throat. He felt her stomach bump up against his as she sucked air in and out. Answering his question was frightening to her—painful. Nothing should be painful to her accept what she chose to be. Faith hadn’t chosen for love to be painful, but it was, wasn’t it? It was all right. He was a master at easing hurt like this.

“Oh, Firecracker,” he said, “Shame on you. You never imagined wanting to be with a mass murdering bastard?”

“Actually,” she sat up on him and grinned, “I did imagine something kinda like that for a while. When I was just a green Slayer, I would read all the issues of Serial Killer Hunk Magazine and pin up the really hot ones on my wall. Richard Rodriguez was my personal fave.”

“I think he’s already married, and besides, he has bad skin in real life, and why wasn’t I in this bloody magazine?”

“Well, the real good ones aren’t sellouts . See, I never imagined I could get someone that wasn’t a sell out and into all the stuff I was: mass murderer, old school and new punk, B TV and movies. And you’re as pretty as me. It’s crazy.”

“And, I like Harry Potter, property damage, and spicy food too,” he reminded.

“Property damage,” she grinned, “Angel is going to kill us.”

“Sod him,” he said, “Property damage completed, I could go for some of that spicy food.”

“No,” she whined hoarsely, “That would mean I’d have to get up off my ass. Let’s just wait a second.”

“Well, you’re not the one on your ass, but better to wait ‘till the sun sets anyway,” he said as his hands caressed her ass.

“Mmm,” she said as she lay down on his chest.
“Well, there is no sense in being a lay bout. 'When the going gets tough the tough get going.' Remember, that’s what Grandmother used to say?” Alistair said cheerfully after Robin had demanded to know what he was doing in the basement of his school.

Robin only had the vaguest idea of what Alistair was doing down in Sunnydale High’s basement. He was probably communing with the dark Gods and Goddesses of whatever. Robin also found that he really didn’t care. He knew Alistair well enough to know that he wasn’t interested in hurting anyone at the school, if he were there would have been signs. Literal signs saying ‘free lunch here’ so he could talk to the students, get inside their minds.

“By Grandmother you mean the woman you cheated on for fifty years, not the woman who lived in Brooklyn and who I never saw after my mother died,” Robin sighed as he sank down and sat on the stairs.

“That wasn’t my fault. It was that of my wonderful son’s, ” Alistair said.

He had just closed a tiny portal that had been swirling full of fog. Robin barely noticed it. He realized the world of demons and magic was going to be in his face anyway, and all he could do was refuse to be apart of it.

“Actually, I don’t remember Grandma Liz ever saying that. She was too busy complaining about what a jack ass you were,” Robin said

“Yes, that woman never blamed her wonderful son for anything, everything was all my fault,” Alistair said.

“No, I mean I don’t ever remember her saying ‘when the going gets tough…’ I think she used to say: 'Up and at em’ George McMatten.' I never knew who George McMatten was,” Robin said.

It was true. He never knew a lot of things that were going on with the Crowleys. He knew Bernard was only telling him half the stories about demons because he wanted Robin to have a normal life. Yeah, a black kid from Brooklyn living with rich English people in Beverly Hills. Really normal. They could make a sitcom about that. Oh wait, they had made two sitcoms like that. Right around the time he was old enough to be pissed off about it, but not old enough to be able to talk about it calmly with the Crowleys. Alistair was the only straight shooter in the bunch.

“Ah yes, it was your mother that had the ‘tough’ expression. It is quite an American saying, isn’t it? She was a spitfire, her mind was so spicy. There used to be a bit of fire like that in your grandmother, that’s why I chose her. I should have taken the risk and sampled her mind first. Then I’d have known what I was in for. Always saying if I made time for the boy he wouldn’t be so awkward around me. That woman didn’t realize how much working both sides took out of a man. I say, how was I supposed to be an Ombudsman for the Council and The United Front of Demons, and have time to play cricket with a boy? It wasn’t until I became my own man and retired from all that I had time. It was much too late for me and Bernard, but at least I could spend time with you,” Alistair said.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s all really Cat’s Cradle and by that I don’t mean the song, I mean the book about the weird cult,” Robin rolled his eyes.

He had become quite the whiney old man, hadn’t he? Robin knew he didn’t have much of a right to criticize this, even if Alistair had created more of his own problems than Robin ever had.

“Cat’s Cradle?” Alistair rubbed his beard nonplussed, “ You know I don’t listen to contemporary musi—Oh yes, that book, didn’t the cult turn out to be correct? Isn’t it interesting that you chose that analogy.”

Alistair only shot him a brief look and a sigh, but Robin knew that was no real brief look or even a sigh.

“Okay, Alistair, what is it? The last time you looked this ominous you told me that Santa Claus did exist, but he disemboweled children.” Robin rolled his eyes.

“I believed you had a right to know and to think my own son kicked me out on Christmas day. I’ll never forgive Bernard for that,” Alistair snipped.

“I was eight. You showed me pictures,” Robin said.

“Well, you asked,” Alistair reminded.

“So, I’m asking now. What is it?”

“Nothing a man resolved to lead an ordinary life would be interested in.”

Alistair was right. Robin was done with the mission. He wanted a normal life, and he still even held out a distant hope that someone he loved would want it with him. He knew that sacrificing Faith had been the right thing; he loved her so much that he had wanted to force her to stop fighting the damned mission. He had begun to have evil fantasies about doing whatever it took to make her stop fighting—extreme emotional manipulation, magic, locking her in his house. He knew these thoughts weren’t right. It wasn’t the kind of guy he was. Being in love with a Slayer- or even worse- an ex-Slayer with no powers, who insisted on fighting, was making him crazy. So he had to end it. Even though breaking up with her hadn’t helped his worry. He wasn’t worried about Spike hurting Faith. He was confident that Angel could handle Spike. He was just plain worried about her, and that was driving him crazy. So he had resolved not to care about the mission, the state of the world, good and evil, any of it. He did care about his job, though, and Alistair doing magic in the basement of his school might affect his job.

“Just tell me what you';re doing here. You know what? Don’t tell me. Let me come out and say we have a policy at the school: No loitering and/or living in the basement. Being that it’s on the mouth of Hell it never works out well. Though, if I’d been in the know when Spike was staying down here I may have made an exception,” Robin said.

“Made an exception for the classless ruffian that killed your mother and not me?”

“He was insane when he lived here. He had just gotten his soul, and he had time to think about what he did. But like a lot of kids, when you make them sit alone and think about what they did, they get over it. Still, maybe if Buffy Summers had never gotten him out of here, I could come here and get in a full days work, and know right were he is. Beneath me crazy and suffering…Of course, it couldn’t be like that since if he stayed that way the world would have ended.”

“Poor Robin. You were always looking for a perfectly just world, and you could never have it. How do you live in this world, my dear boy?”

“It’s not easy. You’re right, this isn’t my world, but I have to live in it. I really think the best thing to do is to remove yourself from all of it. That’s what I’m trying to do. It’s best to realize it’s not your world, and then you just stop caring. You realize all the things that kept you going were never yours to begin with, you know, stuff like that. Then you can just become an average working slob, do you’re job and go home. Unless your adoptive gramps comes by your workplace and starts messing around with black magic, that kinda puts a dent in the plan.”

“I don’t believe this poppycock that you are sprouting for a moment. All of the differences that I’ve had with my family over the years, I’ve alwaysknown that there was never any Crowley that was a quitter,” Alistair said.

He was drawing something on the basement wall with chalk. Maybe he was responsible for the graffiti down here, and not the kids.

“Well, like I keep trying to tell you people, I’m not a Crowley. I’m a Wood, and we’re quitters,” Robin said as he watched Alistair draw.

He knew he should be stopping the old man from drawing on the walls, but he just didn’t care. Robin had been like that lately. He saw kids with cigarettes clearly evident in their back packs and just let it go. They were going to smoke and screw and fail and die. What could he do about it?

“I had differences with your mother too, but for everything she was, she was never a quitter,” Alistair said with his back to Robin.

Alistair was more interested in what he was drawing.

“What do you--- “ Robin felt his head get tight, but then he just sighed and let it go, “Sure she was. She rolled over and died for one vampire—one! That never happens to a Slayer. She had to have stopped trying. I-I think I remember her inviting him into the house. Maybe she even became his friend---“

“Maybe more. Who knows what kind of physical exchange she and Spike were having on the L the night she died. Maybe the vampire got too carried away, or maybe he meant to, that would make more sense, wouldn’t it? You’re mother liked having men in her life. Bernard allowed it, I never—“

“What the hell are you trying to say to me? What are you trying to suggest?”

Robin heard his voice become a low growl. He felt his hands ball into fists.

“See, you are no quitter. Some of it’s in the genes, but most of it’s in the breeding, I always thought.”

Alistair was looking right at him now. He really did look like a little old man with the basement wall of countless grey bricks rising behind him. Maybe he looked a little like the disemboweling Santa Claus, but thin. Gramps liked to keep a good appearance.

“This is just another one of your tricks,” Robin smiled.

He was amused at how hard the old man was trying.
“Well, I’m not a freshman in college anymore, Alistair. You can’t dangle Spike out in front of me saying that we are going to get him, but in the meantime I have to do whatever it is you have in mind,” Robin said.

He welcomed back the comfortable amused numbness he had been feeling.

“This isn’t like before, Robin. I’m done with wanting followers, making my name in the world or worlds. I’m not a young man anymore, and I want someone to carry on my spirit when I die,” Alistair said.

He was the one that looked tight-faced and desperate now.

“Carry on your spirit? Okay, why does that sound just a little creepy? What are you going to propose to me? We kill Spike and then I do some black magic spell to revive you when you die?”

“You were always such an imaginative boy. No, I didn’t say that I was interested in carrying on my soul, just my spirit. I’d like someone in the family to remember me fondly, carry on the work I began. It’s good work, Robin. Not everything I’ve done is horrible, you know? I’m just someone who understands the cost of things, as do you. I gave up my family, you gave up Faith. We aren’t quitters. We did it because we made a choice to go for greatness,” Alistair told him strongly.

“Greatness. I’d settle for some decent Thai food, and one good night’s sleep, ” Robin chuckled.

“I really do not like this new attitude on you. You are at your strongest when you're fighting for justice…When you’re angry.”

“Well, I wouldn’t be the only one here with an attitude problem. I think I’ll go check on the kids in detention,” Robin said and turned to leave.

“You still have some fight in you, Robin. You want justice, and things are more unbalanced now then they’ve ever been,” Alistair said.

“My fight is dead. You’re right, I wanted justice, not vengeance. There is no justice if I kill Spike now. And we made our deal. Faith is safe and you got to do your black magic in my school. Thanks for the heads up that it would reopen the Hellmouth, by the way. We already had one student death, they said it was a suicide but I knew that girl, she would never—“

“I can give you back your fight. Make you angry again, you’d be the son of a Slayer again, if not the lover of one,” Alistair smiled.

“If you even attempt to put some kind of spell on me I’ll—“ Robin growled as he turned back to the old man.

“I’m not your enemy, son. I truly only want to give you what you want, truth, justice, and the American way. Isn’t that little saying adorable? However, I’m serious. I’m involved with people now who are interested in justice. If only you saw what was going on now with Faith and that thug you’d have your spirit back, that’s for sure, but—“

“What? Spike got Faith?” Robin demanded as he walked down the stairs.

“You might say that.”

“Oh my God! No, it can’t be true. We did that spell to protect her.”

“You can’t protect people who don’t want to be protected. ”

“She went to him in the end, of course. Like a moth to a flame. Not even that other vampire could stop that. So, he killed her. I-I’m glad I wasn’t there to see it. I’m glad I got out.”

“Faith isn’t dead, dear boy.”

“What? Oh God. Thank God. Feel free to be more forthcoming with any information like that.”

“I will indeed.”

“So, she isn’t dead, but you said he got her? Faith said this would all come to an end. That weird ass prophecy said something about Spike burning Hell into her. So, what is it, Alistair? Is she a walking 3rd degree burn? Is she some walking Hell dimension now, and if you touch her you experience Hell? Is she some kind of monster?”

“Indeed.”

“Okay, you know how I hate that word. If you are going to be like this I can easily find out elsewhere.”

“Where? From those children? The best source of information of Faith is Mr. Wyndam-Pryce. I’ve actually started working on a project with him myself, rebuilding the Council. I know he wants to make it more ‘egalitarian’ and ‘proactive.’ Now there are words I hate. You might be interested in the concept though.”

“Why? What does it have to do with Faith? Where is she? What happened to her?”

“I’m afraid you wouldn’t believe me if I told you. You have to see it.”

Alistair gestured to the basement wall, and now it seemed to be leading into a room of a brightly lit house. Robin knew, of course, that the basement wasn’t suddenly leading to a beach view condo. If magic worked like that, it would be worthwhile to take it up like the old man wanted. However, Robin realized actual magic wasn’t really magic at all. It was like a really expensive hobby. It was like box kite flying, or photography. Only some people were really good at it, and the cost was high, and it was mostly a waste of time. Watching other people do it who were good at it could be entertaining. Robin touched where the opening to the room seemed to be, and the pattern of the basement bricks showed up over it.

“Stop it!” Alistair chided, “Why must you always do that?”

“It’s cool,” Robin shrugged.

Funny how your family always treated you like you were seven years old, and then you acted like it. Robin hadn’t seen this trick in about twenty years, so there was no way he was “always” doing anything. But he always touched the “screen” when he was a kid. Alistair would show him things, like untelevised baseball games or what Kim Fields was doing at her house. Robin had a crush on the actress that played “Tootie” when he was little, and Alistair would show him what “Tootie” was doing at her house, that was until Bernard came in and put a stop to it. Bernard explained about “abuse of power” and “privacy violations.” Of course, he was right, but Robin was only 10, and he told Bernard that if Tootie really knew him she wouldn’t mind that he looked at her.
Now Robin was looking at Faith. He wasn’t sure if she would mind with the way they had left things, but he had to know she was safe. He had to know what was going on. She looked much better than whatever Alistair had been alluding to. Robin was sure that this was some attempt of Alistair’s to remind him of how beautiful Faith was, so Robin would want Faith back. If Robin had a life with Faith, Alistair probably assumed that Robin would need him more, and be more open to getting back into the family.

Who knows? Alistair’s idea may work. Faith looked radiant. She looked more like a Beverly Hills wife than some down and dirty fighter who left Robin to have Hell burned into her by some evil demon. She was brushing her cinnamon and chocolate hair with a new brush, not the one where the handle was cracked that she refused to throw away. She was wearing new clothes too. Well, almost clothes. She had on an amazing satin bustier that wasn’t at all loud like some of the others she wore. It tastefully showed off what she had. She looked more serene than he had ever seen her. There was no occasional staring off at nothing or frowning. Maybe that was because there was no one else there to bother her. No bratty teens or twenty-somethings reminding her that she had to go slice things up.

She looked so completely free of any trouble he began to wonder what great change had occurred. He knew it was Faith. Her body, her face, they were burned into his mind like his mother’s was. Maybe he tried hard to remember her because he knew she wouldn’t last like his mother. Faith was definitely different though, and it wasn’t just the clothes. He now saw that she had stockings with seams and a garter belt. She went into a huge closet that was mostly empty and took a black suit off of a hanger as she giggled. It had to be Chanel or Barney’s. It was something she could never afford, nor anything she would let him buy for her. He had tried to buy her some clothes once. He wanted to see her in something else besides ratty jeans or skimpy cheap things. She said if she wore the clothes he suggested she would feel like she was “in drag or posing as someone else.”

Well, she would be the best drag queen poser he had ever seen. She looked amazing in the suit, even though it was a little tight around the bust. She seemed to know it too as she looked in the mirror. He saw a hint of the familiar Faith come back as she gave the mirror a sharp jerky grin. Then she guzzled down a whole cup of water, belched and wiped her mouth as she straddled a chair backwards in the skirt. Robin shook his head and smiled. Yes, it was her, and Robin loved her. If Alistair was trying to remind Robin of that, it had worked.

“So, what is this really?” Robin laughed as he watched Faith bend over in the mirror to see if her garter belt showed when she did it.

“Some vision of the future that’ll happen if I do some magic thing with you or something? I always told Faith she’d fit right in with having the best things in life. Looks like she finally believed me,” Robin said to Alistair as they both watched Faith hike up the skirt so the garter belt did show.

“Not quite,” Alistair said.

“So, what do I have to do to make this happen? You’re gonna say move back to Beverly Hills, aren’t you?” Robin sighed, but happily. “This isn’t what could be. This is what is. This is how we get your fight back. I’m sorry it has to be this way, but you do always want the truth, don’t you?” Alistair said this dramatically.

“Right, Oh great spirit of Christmas present,” Robin rolled his eyes.

“Watch,” Alistair said.

Sure, this was fun to watch. Faith was straddled on the chair and put on a color of lipstick he’d never seen her wear. It wasn’t overly dark or red, it looked better, more grown up. Robin knew that was part of the problem with them. Faith was young. She had some growing up to do. Maybe Alistair was showing Robin Faith could grow up. No matter what he knew the old man had an angle.

That’s when Robin saw him. It was only the back of his head as he looked at Faith looking into the mirror. He had no reflection, but he was there. His hair was wet and curled up at the ends. It pointed in different directions, but it was that horrible pale yellow.

“I’m ready to play,” he said, “What is it? Shoots and ladders. We haven’t done shoots and ladders, have we? We’ve done Go fish, we did Lick the flag pole. Of course we could do Rock ‘em Sock em Robots again, but I vote for Shoots and Ladders.”

“I was afraid of this. Look, if you can’t act in a professional manner we’ll just have to forget the whole thing,” Faith said.

She got up of the chair, and there was the sound of her walking. The sound of heels. She never wore heels. She had a belt in her hand that didn’t go with the suit. She sounded like she was trying to talk like a school teacher. She over enunciated all her words and spoke in a higher pitch. What was she doing? Making some deal with Spike to get rid of him?

“We will, will we?” Spike raised his eyebrow, and leaned his arm against the wall in front of where Faith was trying to walk away.

If he touched her against her will while she was powerless against him Robin would kill him. He would make sure he succeeded this time, because he would do it any way he could.

“Yes,” Faith said coolly, “Because it all just comes down to business for a girl like me, Mr. what’s your last name?”

“Don’t have one, being legally dead and all. I am whoever I say I am. What about you? Who are you?” he asked playfully.

“I’m…Lilah,” she smiled, “Lilah Devero.”

Then she frowned as if the name suddenly left a bad taste in her mouth. Robin didn’t like the taste he was getting from this either. Spike had done something to her.

“Sounds like a fake dynasty name,” Spike laughed, “and who am I?”

“Sadly, it’s a real name, one I woulda had if--,” Faith looked angry, but then she interrupted herself with a smile, “You can only be you. Spike, William the Bloody, Billy boy. You could never be anyone else.” Wasn’t that the truth, really? Robin just never understood why Faith was so happy about it. She walked Spike over to the bed and pushed him down on it.

“That’s simply not true,” Spike protested, “I can be the naughty mailroom boy, and I can be the big bad monster, and I can be the stern but fair Daddy. I thought I was going to get to be the naughty mail room boy now.”

Faith had bound his hands together with the belt and pulled them up over his head and tied them to a bedpost that looked beat up. It seemed like this was something she had done before. Robin supposed she had, being a Slayer, although he had only seen her kill demons and vampires. Why bother to tie them up? She wasn’t the type to take prisoners, but maybe that was what she was doing with Spike. Spike didn’t seem like he minded, but it was so like him to be obnoxious when he was under duress. Why was Faith saying she was someone else? Maybe she had become someone else, because Spike had done something to her. Robin found he didn’t want to ask Alistair if that was what he intended to show him. He wanted to see just what had happened to his girlfriend.

“You do do a great big bad monster—so I’ve heard,” Faith smiled but then ended roughly.

She opened all the buttons on Spike’s shirt.

“So, what are you interested in…Lilah?” Spike smirked as Faith had gotten more belts from the closet and bound Spike’s feet.

She kneeled by Spike’s spread apart bound feet and bent to look under the bed. Spike, of course, looked hungrily at her ass, and the stockings and the guarder belt showing thigh skin. His face looked almost pained, eyes half shut, his mouth half open. It was the biggest and most obvious display of lust Spike had ever shown towards Faith, that Robin had seen anyway.

“You want to torture me a little, is that it?” Spike asked as he seemed to try to lift himself up to try to get to her ass.

She came up from under the bed with a stake. She glared at Spike and smiled. She crawled up to Spike’s chest with the stake, and scratched the wooden point down his torso.

“I could give a rat’s ass about your torture, your pain. I only care about two things—power and control,” Faith whispered.

Spike’s eyes fluttered shut and his head fell down. Robin felt like he was sitting with his ass on the end of that stake. So, death gave him a sexual thrill? Great, he could go out hard; but he’d be dust in the end all the same. Faith was going to kill him. Maybe she felt sorry for him and wanted him to go out having fun. Maybe he requested it, or even she was getting off on it. Robin could forgive her, as long as Spike was dead.

“Only those two things, huh? That could get a bit boring after a while, and I’ll want Faith back,” Spike was looking up at her again grinning.

The tip of the stake was right above his heart. Robin held his breath as if that would somehow will it in his chest. Had Faith possessed the spirit of someone else in order to kill the bastard? Was that the only way she could do it?

“Faith, that dirty little street skank psycho with the 9th grade education? What in all of damn creation would make someone like you want her?” Faith was laughing so hard that Robin saw her grip on the stake loosen.

“’ey!” Spike snapped and his body jerked in the ties. It made Faith stop laughing, “ Say something like that again and we’re going to have a problem…Lilah.”

“Count on it,” Faith smirked.

She did it so vapidly that Robin was almost sure she had been possessed by someone else. Spike had been so angry to hear this person insult Faith. If this wasn’t Faith where was she? What happened to her?

“Faith is far better than anyone like you. She would have never taken any of your deals, like Angel. You and her are in entirely different universes,” Spike said.

Faith, or who this person was, held the stake numbly at her side as she knelt over Spike. Then, Robin saw the Faith person smack Spike with her free hand.

“You don’t know anything. Faith and I are pretty much the same animal. She was just too weak and stupid to go for the gold. She wanted to die instead, and anything that happened after that was a freak accident,” Faith spat insulted.

Robin wasn't sure if this was Faith or not.

“Nothing is a freak accident. You made all your own choices, and I made mine. They led me here, tied up with a beautiful girl that has decided to play an ice queen psycho. Not that I’m complaining. I do wonder what she is trying to tell me. Why is she so interested in power and control? How could she think she had any power if she worked for the big bad invisible bosses?”

Spike’s lower lip jutted out as his eyes looked straight into Faith’s. So, this was Faith. Robin knew it really was her now by the way she was looking back at Spike. He’d seen her look that way when she thought Robin was dead. Sad, but resolved. Was she going to kill Spike now? Was she going to give him a hero’s speech as to why she had to do it? Not some long-winded thing that Buffy Summers would do, but something truly heart-felt about how real heroes did what they had to do, which meant killing people they liked because they were crazy and out of control.

“You don’t get it,” she said icily now, “if you give up your control to the worst thing imaginable, then you do have power. You joined up with the worst of them, so who can touch you now?”

“They can, and they do. You have the least of what you could have if you do that,” Spike said rather seriously.

He looked like he was trying to break free of the ties. Robin didn’t really understand the turn the conversation made, and he didn’t care. He just kept his eye on the stake that Faith now only loosely held at her side.

“But then at least you know it’s coming, at least it can’t get any worse. You know what you’re in for and this way you deserve it,” her eyes got misty now.

“I know that you didn’t deserve any of the bad thingsthat happened to you. People hurt you and manipulated you, and that is why you made bad decisions. You were just a little bit,” Spike said, as he tried more obviously to break free from the bed.

He was trying to distract Faith. She had tricked him with her flirting into a position where she could kill him and now Spike was trying to twist things.

“No, I was never a little--- I was eighteen when I—“

“But, when it all started, you were a little bit. What happened? Who hurt you? The first one? You don’t have to tell me just give me the name of the first one and I’ll—“

“We’re not here to talk about me. We’re here to talk about you. You and you’re freak ass!” Faith sneered.

Robin breathed a sigh of relief. Now she was back on track. She could kill him.

“How could you love with no soul?” she demanded and smacked him across the face.

Spike head thrust back and he grunted. She had only smacked him, but Robin couldn’t see her other arm with the stake in it anymore. Maybe she was carving him up with it. He wished she would just do it. Get it over with. It didn’t matter that Spike could love. His love hadn’t helped all the people he murdered and all the children he orphaned. So what if it had helped keep Buffy’s ass warm at night so she could save the world? Now Buffy was gone and Spike had proved more harmful than useful.

“What the hell was wrong with you? Why do you love Slayers? It’s some kind of kink isn’t it? You even have a thing for that Faith skank and she isn’t a Slayer anymore?” Faith demanded and after every question she slapped him.

“Maybe it’s not that I love Slayers, maybe the Powers that Be who chose the one to be chosen pick the best and strongest women in all the world, and if any git got to know them he’d be in love with them, did you ever think of that!” he growled at her red faced and wide eyed.

Then he grunted and tilted his head back and opened his mouth. What the hell was she doing to him? Then, she caressed his face, and Robin never felt so stupid in his entire life. That was the first real affection she had given to the vampire. Yes, the room had been thick with innuendo, and the bitch had been showing off her ass and strapping the scrawny ratface to a bed, but it wouldn’t be the first time Robin saw Faith use her sexuality in slaying. He thought that was what she had been doing, and he decided he was going to forgive her for it. However, what had been going on right in front of him wasn’t some manipulation in order to kill Spike. It was a manipulation all right, but it was more literal, physical. A manipulation Faith was very good at. Funny, Robin was usually so good at catching people at this. When he did catch them he always gave them a warning. Get caught jerking off/being jerked off in school again and we’ll have trouble. But, Robin was really out of second chances at the moment.

“But Faith isn’t a Slayer anymore,” she said softly.

How true. Faith wasn’t a vampire Slayer anymore. No, now she dressed up for them in designer outfits and jerked them off on beds. Robin laughed audibly at the part of himself that held out hope that this was just the nicest way Faith could think of the kill the vampire that murdered his mother.

“No, she’s better than a Slayer. She was willing to give up being a Slayer just to save me, and she’s happy to live in a big bad nasty world with no power with me. No Slayer has ever sacrificed herself for a vampire before,” Spike said in between grunting.

God, did he ever shut-up! Wait what had he said?

“God, do you ever stop yapping!” Faith scoffed.

“Make me, Li-lah,” Spike laughed.

So, Faith then kissed the vampire. Their mouths mashed together like two fighting fish. She would break away from him, and then seemed to change her mind and come back. She was taunting. Then, she went to pull his pants all the way down.

“Lilah, that’s some biblical whore’s name,” Spike laughed.

Well, at least something fit right in this little game.

“What would Lilah care about who I loved?” Spike asked.

“Well, I’m a real hot fudge sundae. Hot on the outside and cold and vanilla inside. I figured you could teach me what it was all about. So I could get an edge and fake it,” she said.

“You’re not gonna have to fake a thi….”

Spike had been talking. Faith’s hand had been going up his chest while she was unbuttoning the skirt. Now there was nothing there but the brick of the Sunnydale high basement.

“Sorry,” Alistair said.

“Why should you be sorry?” Robin grumbled as he still stared at the brick wall.

“Well, I meant I was sorry for stopping it there. It was just getting a little too unseemly for my taste. I only watched enough of it to make sure I knew what was happening. I am an old fashioned chap."

"You mean there's more?" Robin demanded.

"I'm afraid so. They've been locked together in that house for days. It all started when they were arguing about how she shouldn't have tried to sacrifice her life for him. I only check in to make sure he doesn't end up hurting her. He can get quite rough, and I thought I may be able to help with magic if he...Too bad I wasn't around when he and your mother..." Alistair's voice trailed off.

"She tried to sacrifice her life for him?"

"Oh, yes," Alistair laughed, "It was the oddest thing. It turned out that was what the whole Rhoshobi Prophecy was all about. He was going to burn his soul into her, and that would have killed him, and she wouldn't allow it. Butthat would mean she had to die. She was lying to us all when she said something bad was going to happen if we let the soul burning continue. She went off with that other vampire to protect William of all things. But luckily something was on her side and she lived. Maybe it was the spells we did for her."

"Has he hurt her at all?" Robin asked in a whisper.

"Not from what I can see, but you know me. I'm a bit squeamish. So maybe there's--"

"You can make it so I can see it all, right?"

"You know the rules. They have to have made the place their dwelling, and it seems they have-- for now. As long as they stay in that house and there isn't a lot of coming and going, or should I say going and returning to the house in this case, I can get a view of them for a time."

"I want to see it all. Everything you can get," Robin told Alistair firmly.

"If you must," Alistair sighed, " But I'll just set it up. I won't watch. I am more of a fan of the old movies that were full of subtly. Remember Lauren Bacall: ‘Just put your lips together and blow.’ Those movies were more titillating as well as taste—“

“Alistair!” Robin roared, “This isn’t a movie this is my life! That wasn’t Lauren Bacall and that definitely was not Humphrey Bogart. That was my girlfriend and she was fucking the vampire that killed my mother.”

“I didn’t think this would turn out like this. If I knew you were going to be so emotional about—“

“You didn’t think I’d be so emotional about it?” Robin demanded, “I ended my relationship with her for her sake, not for mine. I did it because I loved her so much it was killing me to see her be in danger. She was in danger because of him, and now, she’s, she’s—“

“I meant I didn’t think that you would believe what I was showing you at first. I thought that we would have to have this whole tiresome back and forth because you would think I was tricking you with something that wasn’t real. As if I would ever. But, you knew it was real, because you always suspected it didn’t you?” Alistair said.

“I also suspected that you always knew how to get Spike over the years. You always knew he was the one that killed my mother, and you always had the power to get him. But instead you held him out on a string so I’d be your grandson—why?” Robin demanded as he stalked up to the old man.

“I meant that you always suspected your Slayer had more than a plutonic affection---“Alistair had on his cool smile even though Robin could probably snap him like a twig right now.

“I know what you meant;” Robin said in a low but fierce voice, “Just answer the damned question!”

“I knew Spike as William the Bloody and I did business with him in the past. Did I know he was the one that killed your mother? No. Did I have my suspicions that William the Bloody had become one of those punk-rockers and also went by the name of ‘Spike,’ and therefore was Nikki’s murderer? At times. Do I have the power to turn him to dust and make him suffer unspeakable tortures from where I stand? I am not sure. I’d have to try it to find out, but I won’t,” Alistair said.

“Why not?” Robin demanded as he had walked Alistair into the wall.

“Because, dear boy,” Alistair scoffed, “Maybe we don’t have the same blood, but we’re of the same ilk. I knew it when I saw you when you were five years old when you snuck into the back of the car to follow your mother into the hunt. I have a love for you I never had for my own children. If I handed you something, as I handed it to my own son and he to his, you would have just become like him—resentful of me and unable to take control for yourself. Do you know how far Bernard could have taken your mother if he hadn’t---- Never mind.”

Alistair looked somberly at Robin. He no longer looked at him like he was amused or felt pity for him.

“I showed you the truth, and now you’re angry and you should be. But you are a good man, Robin. You won’t want to kill Spike,” Alistair told him.

“Like hell I won’t,” Robin grumbled.
“No, Robin, I know you. You have that good Yank spirit in you. I often think it’s rather a shame. But you want justice,” Alistair said.

“You think I consider that shit getting Faith justice?” Robin laughed.

“You wouldn’t be the boy I knew if you did. What troubles me most is you said you accepted this wasn’t your world. The Slayers didn’t want to kill William because he’s done good for the world, but he’s also done bad. So just leaving him be isn’t just. In your world, a just world, he’d be able to do all the good he liked, but no more bad, including shenanigans with Slayers because that can’t be leading anywhere good,” Alistair said.

“This is that chip thing, right? You and some old Council people want to put the chip back in his head,” Robin said.

“That’s only the beginning,” Alistair said, “We can make a whole new world with the demons, for too long they’ve been controlling us. The old Council was always weak. That was why I left.”

“I thought you got thrown out,” Robin said.

“Because they were too weak. We should be an empire, a force, not a bunch of floundering academics. I know you never wanted to be part of the old Council, and who could blame you, but this would be something entirely different. Would you want to be a part of that?” “I want to be a part of justice,” Robin said firmly.

To be continued….