A/N: It's the last chapter, you guys! I'll blabber at the end, so read and enjoy!

A lot has happened since they found out. I suppose all this "soul searching," as Ayame puts it, has made me start reflecting on the recent past. I didn't really mean to think about it all so deeply, but it's made me wonder what's in store for us. I can feel my hold on the Juunishi deteriorating every day. It makes me sick to my stomach, knowing I'm losing my precious things. Though, I can also feel my self-respect gradually becoming stronger. My decision to live how I want to live has changed me in a "positive" way. They say it's "positive," they being Hatori and Kureno, but I don't like that word. I only want to change in a way that will make that bitch go even crazier than she already is.

There's a few things that have been bothering me, though. Kureno keeps saying that I should start respecting the Juunishi. It makes him sad when I refer to them as objects. Well, that's too bad for him. I am their God, therefore, they are mine. Kureno says you can't own people, but I simply tell him that I don't look at the Juunishi as people. That solves that problem. Well, there's still the problem of me not thinking of them as human beings . . . Whatever! I don't care. I also have Hatori on my back about my health. He says I need to start taking care of myself. The one thing that seems to bother him the most is me being dangerously underweight, so he practically breathes down my neck while I eat.

Surprisingly enough, Ayame seems to be the only one not hassling me. He'll blabber on and on about how happy he is for me, but all I'll do is roll my eyes and tell him he's an idiot. I really don't mind him going on like that because I agree with what he says, to some degree. Ren is mentally challenged, and I am old enough to make my own decisions. Him saying how "gorgeous" I am . . . Well, I can do without that.

Then there's Yuki . . . I have only talked to him on the phone a few times, never seeing him face to face. I don't mind, though. He'll still talk to me, at least. I'm not giving up on him! He'll come back to me; it'll just take a while longer. I'll wait patiently for my little nezumi. I won't force him because it will be more satisfying if he comes on his own accord. He must have realized, in his heart, that he belongs to his God. It will be so nice to run my fingers through his hair and inhale his scent again . . .

See? I haven't turned my back on my true self. I will always be possessive and cruel. I'll just be a possessive, cruel person who respects herself. That's the difference. . . . and I really don't mind that difference.

Ah, I had a bizarre dream the other night. I still don't understand it, but it leaves an uneasy feeling in my heart. The entire dream consisted of fourteen stones laying on the ground in the sun. Each of the stones were identical in size and shape. Throughout the dream, twelve of them all moved in the same direction, the other two remaining. I then realized the day was actually going by. It wasn't in real time, though, for the sun was setting too quickly. Anyway, the stones kept moving towards the setting sun. That was it. It was such a simple dream that it scared me. I'll have to ask Hatori later to see if he can figure out what it means.

Oh, yes, that's right. Hatsuharu and Isuzu . . . I will forgive Hatsuharu for what he did to me when he returns, after he knows he doesn't belong anywhere else. As for the running away bit, well, both of them shall be severely punished. Hatsuharu will be punished anyway, even with my forgiveness. Oh, but I shall thoroughly enjoy breaking that girl. It will destroy them both. All of this will happen after they come crawling back to their God. Kazuma better not talk them out of it when the time comes . . .

Jeez, how could I forget about this? Shigure visited me a few days ago. He told me he heard about my kimono, so he simply couldn't resist coming over any longer. I was not particularly happy about seeing him, but there was nothing I could do. He ended up cornering me, and I couldn't fight him because of my injury. After saying weird things, he moved in to kiss me, but I covered my mouth with my hand. It was the only thing I could think of. Then he smiled. Yes, smiled. It wasn't one of his twisted smirks. He slowly took my hand away from my face and simply held it in his for a moment. Then Shigure kissed me, putting his other hand on my cheek. I didn't feel like trying to retaliate, so I gave in and kissed him back. I did my best to forget about all the terrible things he said and did to me, trying to become lost in the moment. It worked for a little while. During that time, he managed to undo my sash and feel me up a bit. At that point, I snapped out of my ecstasy and pushed him away. He complied and let me cover myself. I could feel my face turn red with embarrassment and anger. I shouldn't have let him do that to me. After that, I quietly told him to leave. Shigure smiled again, nodded, and walked out silently. His demeanor was confusing, and it made me question my feelings for him. God, I hate it that he does this to me. I hate being so . . . so vulnerable and bewildered.

Anyway . . . life seems to have slowed down. I can sit for hours, staring at my garden or the clouds in the sky. I find peace in watching nature. Everything's so organized yet so cruel. It's just like the old saying, "Hunt or be hunted." Everything has a purpose, has a role in the way of life and death. It's almost fascinating. Only now I truly pay attention to what's around me, and I am somewhat jealous. If I was something in nature, it wouldn't matter if I was male or female. Although, I suppose humans are a part of nature.

Sighing, I get up slowly and walk out of my garden. I've had enough thinking for one day. When I get inside, I find Kureno kneeling in the middle of the room. He says nothing and only looks at me. I go over and stand in front of him, looking straight ahead. After a few moments pass, he rises and takes a step towards me. I look up at him and plead with my eyes for him to hold me. Kureno sighs and puts his arms around me, bringing my body close to his. I, in return, put my arms around him and bury my face in his shirt. All troubling thoughts leave my mind as I breathe in deeply and close my eyes. Kureno was always good making me feel relaxed. I can feel his chin rest lightly on the top of my head as he holds me tighter against his body. I don't want to say anything, fearing it will ruin this moment.

All I want . . .

All I want is to be happy.

Yes, I know, it's short. There's only so much you can do with no dialog. Oh, and Shigure's behavior will be explained in the sequel. Anyway . . . it's finished! Yaaay! Well, not really, because of the sequel. I've already started writing it, but I don't know when I'll post the first chapter. Sometime in the summer is all I can say. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and the story as a whole! I love you all, my faithful reviewers!

I also love my wonderful editor, Dai-chan. Thanks a bunch, man! You rule!

Keep an eye out for the sequel, "Her Torment."
/waves/ Mina-san gokigenyou!