|Sharp Dressed Mutant
Author: Amarin Rose PM
Pairings: J-S, K-K, Bobby-St. John, Rogue-Todd, Pietro-Tabby, Lance-Amara, Jamie-Rahne Summary: The Brotherhood (well, Pietro - with a little help from Kurt) has pranked the mansion! Retaliation is expected, and, of course, you know: this means WAR!Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 9,560 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 11-11-05 - Published: 09-02-04 - id: 2040926
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
The Brotherhood had attacked.
And they'd chosen a rather…odd form of confrontation.
Everywhere the Xavier Institute students looked there were bumper stickers, plastered all over every available surface and blaring out insulting, offensive, and downright rude messages.
Some of them were even funny – but not to the people they were aimed at.
A scream echoed from Jean's room, and the kids who were awake so far – Rogue, Kitty, Bobby, Jubilee, Rahne and Jamie – pelted down the hall, expecting to find Magneto strangling her, or something worse.
What they found was Jean glaring at a sticker on her mirror, Scott trying to calm her down.
"Jean, it's not that bad," Cyclops said soothingly.
"Not that bad!" Jean shrieked. "It says 'I'm not a flake; I'm just a blonde in disguise!' Forget the fact that I am not shallow; this is my natural hair color." She huffed and tossed her bright red tresses over her shoulder.
"Which explains the red rinse you keep in your medicine cabinet," Rogue said smartly.
Jean's face burned and, using her telekinesis, she ripped the sticker off her mirror, leaving behind strips of glue on the polished silver surface.
At that moment, St. John ran in, waving a burning piece of paper in the air. "I'm gonna get those jokers if it's the last thing I do!" he roared.
"What's it say, Sparky?" Bobby asked, coming up to stand behind his boyfriend. "Or, rather, since you've incinerated it – what did it say?"
Pyro's face burned almost as red as Jean's had. "Something about all my sexual sparks sizzling out," he mumbled so only Iceman could hear.
Bobby choked, but wisely refrained from commenting.
A roar echoed through the mansion.
"I guess they got Wolverine," Jubilee said, popping her gum unconcernedly. "Should we go check it out?"
The others exchanged glances.
"Nah," they all said.
No matter how fueled by anger-induced adrenaline they were, none of them were stupid enough to take on Logan in a Berserker Rage.
"We need to get them back," Jamie said. "If not even Mr. Logan is safe…"
Rahne shuddered. "Aye, Jamie me lad, that's true. We should get 'em back before Logan thinks ta do it."
"Or else they'll end up dead," Rogue put in. "And I don't know about the rest of ya, but I finally got Todd slightly civilized, and I ain't about to let nobody – not even Logan – hurt him."
"Same with me and Lance," Amara put in as she padded into the room. "If anyone's going to take rockhead out, it's going to be me."
Kurt teleported in right on her heels, his tail singed and sending off sparks. "Ack!" he bellowed. "Berserker has got to learn to calm down. It was only a joke, fer Gott's sake."
Kitty's eyes narrowed on her boyfriend. "Kurt?" she asked sweetly.
"Ah, yah, Katzchen?" Kurt asked distractedly, focusing on putting the sparks on his tail out.
"What do you know about this bumper sticker plague?" Kitty asked.
Kurt froze. He carefully turned around and upon seeing almost the whole school gathered in Jean's room – and looking at him with murderous intent – gulped. "Ah…nozzing?" he offered lamely, before teleporting away.
"Get 'im!" was Kitty's battle cry and all the girls rallied around her, using their various powers to track the Fuzzy Elf down.
The boys, for their part, wondered just how much trouble Kurt's latest practical joke was going to get them into.