June 16, 2004

Dear Diary-

Today I got sick. Ugh. Getting sick on an island with your dream hotties is not fun because they are all over you acting like doctors and all that stuff. Well, it was just a little fever, but they were just weird. Here's how the conversation went:

L NOOOOOOO!! Tracy, my true love, is sick!!

D What? She is my love, not yours, you foolish elf!

(note- deep Transylvanian accent)

L You dare to insult the Prince of Mirkwood? I shall fight thee to the death!

D With pleasure, damned soul!

See the problem? I'm sitting here, thinking, "Um, whatever happened to me ?!" So I started crying to make them stop fighting. What babies they are sometimes. Honestly. I don't know how much more of this I can take!!

June 17, 2004

Dear Diary-

This morning I went for a nice long walk by myself along the beach. Ah...how glorious to be alone. But then, behind me, I hear a huge explosion and Legolas and Dracula were fighting again!! Oh well...their problem. Today was my day. Mwahhahahahaha!! Then I became very bored with walking, so then I ran into the water and splashed around. It was a lot of fun. Maybe this whole island thing isn't so bad.

Note to self- Make even stronger protection barrier for self at night. Am beginning to suspect another evil plot from the two sexy ones.

June 18, 2004

Dear Diary-

Hahaha!! I'm so happy!! I just realized something...I've missed a whole month of school!! Haha!! Today is the last day, and I'm not there!! Instead, I'm on an island with the two sexiest guys ever!! Boo ya!! Eat that, school geeks! Haha. Even though I technically am one...well...anyway...nothing happened today...Legolas was staring at me in a most unusual matter...same with Dracula...these guys really have to take their shirts off...they are just too hot...omg!! They just did!! They must have heard me muttering to myself!! I am so happy!! Mwahhaha...they are so good looking...yay!! )

June 19, 2004

Dear Diary-

Today was captured. Again. VERY weird! Well, today I was captured by the very evil, very sinister, Sauron. But the weird thing is that heÂ’s not that HUGE eye. He's an elf. Okay...that's just wrong. Especially since he's an elf-hater! C'mon!! Anyway, he was getting very romantic on me, and I was all, push!! So I just stood chained to a wall while he stared at me...pervert...but then Legolas and Dracula came and rescued me...Legolas beat the crap out of Sauron. Yay!! My guys kick butt!! Literally. Yup...so I went back to the island and made my beaus some good eating. Yum yum. Except they fought right after my meal. I swear, there is no justice sometimes. No justice at all.

June 20, 2004

Dear Diary-

Okay...today was very...uh...interesting...literally!! I (for some random reason...wtf?!) started singing on this rock near the shore after taking a swim in the crystal blue water. Apparently, when one sings, it stops one's two true loves from fighting one another for one moment to listen to oneself. I think. Anyway, that's what happened to me. This morning, one of the hot ones accidently kicked sand in my food. Then, they were fighting over who did it. I SWEAR!! IT'S JUST SAND!! Did they forget there is a NEVER ENDING supply of food on the island!? I mean, seriously. Anyway, when I started singing, they stopped and stared at me, and then went back to fighting. Anyhoo...I have a premonition...for some reason, I feel that something is going to happen either today or tomorrow. VERY soon though. I'm not sure if it's good or bad!! Oh God, please let it be good. Maybe it'll be the fact that Legolas and Dracula are not going to fight anymore . And maybe kiss/hug me! Or maybe they will fight forever. NOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Enemy/Friend, I'll have my revenge!! (and my thanks!!) )

June 21, 2004

Dear Diary-

OMG!! The premonition from yesterday was RIGHT!! WHAT ARE THE ODDS!! My friend Joanie came and visited me! YAY! How odd/awesome/bad! Legolas and Dracula looked really pissed when they saw the airplane landing, but were relived it was a girl and not some random guy I met once. Or a weirdo. Or James. Honestly...they are so JEALOUS!! Mwahahahahaha...anyway, I asked Joanie (while Legolas and Dracula each went for a walk ALONE) if her sister Kristen got my awesome gift of the exotic coconut. Joanie said she did, but also that she didn't understand what the point of the coconut was. And how it could be exotic. HELLO?! Coconuts are AWESOME. And it's exotic because I'm on a desert island!! Seriously...anyway, the visit was cool. Except for the fact that she left. You know why? BECAUSE I COULD HAVE ESCAPED ON HER PLANE!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

WHY MUST I FORGET SUCH IMPORTANT THINGS!? Don't get me wrong, I love and long to be on an island with Legolas and Dracula, but enough is enough!! I didn't know they were going to fight the WHOLE time!! SHEESH!! My life is awesome/horrible/okay. You take your pick. GAH!! Shall write tomorrow if I can possibly get any sleep. Which I probably won't since the two hot ones have been bombarding me with questions about Joanie's visit. Oh well.

Note to self: Might possibly need an even STRONGER protection shield for day/night. Am suspecting yet another evil plot from the two hot ones/beasts.

June 23, 2004

Dear Diary-

OMG!! Sorry for not writing yesterday, but yesterday was a historic event. I am not kidding. The two hot ones...they...well...THEY DIDN'T FIGHT!! For a whole day, I actually understood what "paradise" meant!! Basically, it means, "The time when your two hot ones do not fight over you but spend time with you...etc." I couldn't believe it!! I guess my luck is beginning to go the way I want it to go. YAY! First, they each hugged/kissed me and didn't argue over who went first!! Then they cooked me breakfast/lunch/dinner (all at their proper times!!) Then we all went on the beach and swam and took long walks and did lots of other things!! In conclusion, I had so much fun!! I wasn't sure if it was a special holiday yesterday, but they treated me like a princess. Sigh...if only they could have done that EVERY day thus far. But nope. Only for ONE fricken day on this island!! Today, I thought they were going to be all nice again, but no. Nada. Nothing. They are being such asses again!! (not to me- to each other!!) GAH!! Where is the loyalty?! WHERE IS THE JUSTICE?! There is none, I s'pose. W/E...something weird did happen today though. Dracula tried to make me a vampire. He hasn't tried that since the first day!! ( or was it the second? Maybe the third?! I DON'T KNOW!!) Anyway, I thought that was kinda weird. Legolas shot an arrow into his back, but I guess Legolas forgot that Dracula is virtually indestructable. Sheesh. Now they are fighting AGAIN. Honestly...I almost miss those guys who kidnapped me...minus Captain Barbossa, of course. Oh well. I took a VERY long walk today. Apparently, there IS no one on this island. Very interesting. Y'think I'd figured that out already!! Uh-oh. I better go. Dracula looks like he's about to kill Legolas!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

June 24, 2004

Dear Diary-

Dammit...I seriously cannot believe this. I thought that all those random guys that were kidnapping me had stopped. Well, apparently not. Ok...so today I was captured by, um, Gabriel Van Helsing. He's pretty cool, but he HAS to get some sort of a hair cut!! That long hair look is NOT working!! Van Helsing is pretty cute, I guess, but not NEARLY as cute as Legolas or Dracula!! It was kinda weird how he kidnapped me. He came out of no where on a rope ( holding the rope, I mean...ok...who comes in on a rope anyway? The last time that happened was in INDIANA JONES!! Or maybe another recent movie...NO COMMENT!!). Anyway, he then took me to this really beautiful castle on a island sort of close to mine (or ours). It was nice, but it was kinda awkward, especially when Carl came out of nowhere (and I mean NOWHERE!!) and started serving me food. I was all...WTF!? Perhaps Van Helsing has a grudge against my Count Dracula. I guess I can't blame the guy. BUT WHAT'S IT GOT TO DO WITH ME?! When I asked him, he just winked at me and said I was beautiful. Ok...flattery won't get you anyth- hey, did he call me BEAUTIFUL?? Maybe I should consider this. Just kidding!! Anyhoo, he tried to kiss me, and as I was trying to push him away, Legolas and Dracula came and destroyed the nice castle! Legolas beat up Carl (he thought he did something OTHER than serve me food, which he thought was poisonous. WEIRDO!! But a CUTE weirdo!) and Dracula REALLY fought with Van Helsing. He won, I supppose, because Van Helsing was suddenly on his knees holding me and begging for mercy. Freak of nature!! Seriously...you should have seen the look of angry on Legolas and Dracula's faces. IT WAS A KODAK MOMENT!! Awwww...my guys are so thoughtful. I guess I'm pretty lucky in a way. Although I'm still pissed at them for destroying the awesome castle. Maybe they'll try to cheer me up. Oh well. Back to the island as I weep in despair over the castle. I can't believe they are falling for this!! Damn...I'm a good actress!! I should totally try out for a movie sometime. Or a broadway play. WHO KNOWS!!1 The sky's the limit. Shall write tomorrow!!

June 25, 2004

Dear Diary-

I am so tired today. I have no idea why. It's a wonder that I can even write in this diary without spelling someting...oh no!! I WROTE SOMETHING WRONG!! I really meant to write "something". See? I really am tired. So tired...ugh...I just want to go back to sleep!! But nooooooooooooooooo...Legolas and Dracula CLAIM they have a great ol' surprise for tired me. LIKE WHAT?! A NICE FLUFFY BED WITH WARM COVERS AND A GREAT GIGANTIC PILLOW?! Ah...sounds so soothing...and awesome...anyway, they woke me up at the crack of dawn. Literally. I actually SAW the sun rising. It's really pretty and all, but not nearly as pretty as when you are actually AWAKE!! Anyway, the surprise was so...well...it was so worth it. NOT. They woke me up so early not for the sunset. Oh no. That wasn't the great surprise. Do you want to know what the great surprise was? A LETTER FROM MY BROTHERS. Oh joy! Oh rapture! I'm so happy! NOT. I'm going back to bed RIGHT NOW. What lame asses they are sometimes...

June 26, 2004

Dear Diary-

Wow...I'm so freakin' stupid sometimes. I seriously can't believe what a jerk I was yesterday. It's true, I WAS really tired and slept the whole day, but still...that's no excuse for my behavior. I can't believe I wasn't even excited about getting a letter from my OWN TWO BROTHERS!! I'm not really sure though how they found out about me being here on this island. I was kinda shocked when I read the letter. I went something like this:

Dear Tracy,

We know about you being on that island with those two idiots, Legolas and Dracula. If you do anything stupid, we will come and break their legs. And the rest of them. We will make them suffer so much, they will never recover. Hope you're having a great time!

Love, your two OLDER brothers,

Sasha and Chris

P.S.

We're serious.

See what I mean? Do they honestly think I would do anything "wrong" with the two of them? Seriously. My brothers are WAY too overprotective. I guess I can't blame them though. I AM their little baby sister. Oh well...I guess Legolas and Dracula were a little pissed at the letter. Maybe not though. I guess they want to make sure they're good friends with my two brothers. I guess those two would do anything. Aw...but they DO have to work on jealousy. Perhaps I'll have a nice little chat with them tonight. Ugh. Wish me good luck!

June 27, 2004

Dear Diary-

Okay...so I had that talk with them last night about the jealousy. At first, it appeared as if they were actually agreeing with me. But then they began to suspect I wanted them to back off because I had another guy on my mind. I told them that I didn't want them to fight becasue I loved them!! (okay, that sounds really corny, but still!!). So today, I had an awesome idea. Since today is my brother Chris's birthday, I suggested that the three of us have a party to celebrate. They thought it was a great idea, and it was working out all great. Then it went all wrong. It all started when they wanted to play truth or dare. I am not joking. How old are we? FIVE?! Anyway, that went horribly. I'm not even going to mention some of the details. Then one of the dares lasted forever. We had to all sing songs. Well, the two sang love songs to me, but hate songs to each other. Oh fun. GAH!! To make me feel better, they each built a sandcastle, THEN argued over whose was better. Out of anger, I knocked over the sandcastles. I AM SO PISSED AT THEM!! I have resolved not to talk to them for the rest of the time on this island!! (or at least until tomorrow). Well, anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHRIS!! REALLY GLAD YOU AIN'T (er, aren't) HERE!! HAHAHAHAHA!!

Note to self: Try not to talk to the two hot ones. Remember that you are angry at them. Make sure you wink at them tomorrow. GAH!!

June 28, 2004

Dear Diary-

Okay...something really freaking happened this morning. I woke up, and I didn't hear any fighting. I assumed Legolas and Dracula were fighting, but when I went to check on them, they weren't there!! So then I assumed they went for walks, but I couldn' really make out footprints in the sand. WTF!? It was very nerve-recking. I then decided that I had to search the island for them, and I did a WHOLE search of the island. NOTHING. I was so worried. To tell the truth, I still haven't found them yet. Perhaps if I scream in pain/distress/anger, they will come to my aid! Ok...that did not work!! HOLY SHIT!! WHERE ARE THEY!! Okay...I must not panick...think...think...what had I said that could have made then disappear? OMG!! I KNOW!! Last night I was REALLY angry at them. Perhaps they took my anger seriously and decided to leave me here on the island...alone...Or perhaps they simply killed each other. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! Oh my gosh...I'm really hoping it's choice one. I'm really nervous at the moment. Gah. It's seriously not fun to be on an island by yourself...at night...Especially when the random kidnappers are at large!! Oh Lord!! What happens if one of them comes and kidnaps me? WHO THE HELL IS GOING TO STOP THEM!? Oh boy...I am definately praying HARDER tonight!! (not that I haven't prayed on the island. I just didn't mention it in the diary!) Please wish me luck!! I REALLY HAVE TO FIND THEM!!

Note to self: Make sure barrier shield is working in case of random kidnapping attack from kidnapper or kidnappers unknown.

June 29, 2004

Dear Diary-

Oh my God. I am seriously going to kill them. And perhaps reward them!! "They", as in Legolas and Dracula, came back this morning, looking very tired and very annoyed. I was so relieved to see them, but when they approached, I slapped them both on the cheeks and screamed, " WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU TWO!? I WAS HERE ALL NIGHT BY MYSELF!! Oh thank goodness you're back!!". I gave them both hugs. Ugh. WHY AM I SUCH A SUCKER FOR CUTE FACES!? Oh...right...anyway, they said that they felt bad that I must always witness them fighting. So, for one day, they decided to fight on a seperate island so I could be alone for a while. IS THAT NOT THOUGHTFUL/STUPID?! Mixed emotions over here...hahhaha...anyway, the slap was enough punishment, so I cooked them a nice breakfast. And you know what? They still had some bitter arguements, but they were seemingly acting nice towards each other (whatever the hell that means!!). So after we had breakfast, I decided to relax by lying down in the sun and REALLY try to get a tan. As if I don't have one already!! Nice...it'll probably last until winter!! Weird...anyway, that was fun until some sand was accidently kicked on me. Apparently, Legolas and Dracula were playing football, and Legolas couldn't reach the REALLY high pass Dracula threw, and it landed right next to me, and sand, coincidentally, spilled all over me. I really didn't care. In fact, it was kind of cool. But NOOOOOOOOOOO. THEY WENT BACK TO FIGHTING. AGAIN. Seriously. Oh well. Guess you can't win 'em all! Now to go take a bath...

Note to self: While taking bath, make sure protective shield is at its height of power. Do not want to take chances.

June 30, 2004

Dear Diary-

Oh my God. Today is a VERY sad/happy/omg no way day! Not really sure if that's good or bad, but whatever...this morning was kind of quiet. Same old routine as usual: we woke up, we ate, we hung out, they fought, I got angry...you get the point!! Anyway, around lunch time, I heard a huge helicopter. All three of us looked up into the sky. The helicopter hovered over and dropped a rope down on the island. SAVED!! So all three of us quickly gathered our belongings and such and went up the rope (there was a slight arguement over who was to go next after I went first. I wonder why...oh...now I get it...perverts...). As soon as we got in, the helicopter was zooming off, and the island seemed to disappear into the horizon. It was very sad, but also very relieving, although I believe that Legolas and Dracula are very upset/angry about our leave. You wouldn't believe who was flying the helicopter: my Enemy/Friend!! WEIRD!! It was a very tearful good-bye for me and the two others, although they seemed glad to get rid of each other. Anyway, while I was getting off, my Enemy/Friend said to me, "I shall strike again! This time, in a more 'cozy' setting! TA-TA, Tracy!". Then I was dropped off. Huh. I wonder what the hell my Enemy/Friend meant? Who knows? There could be endless possibilities on the horizon. I've been pondering the word "cozy" and have come to the conclusion that my Enemy/Friend will strike around wintertime. Uh-oh. I better start packing my warm clothes!! Anyway, I better go. It seems I have a LOT of questions to answer from some friends/family/everybody I know. Gulp. WISH ME LUCK!! Until something weirder happens, SEE YA!!

Note to self: Write letters to the hot ones. Tell them how much you miss them. Tell them also of what Enemy/Friend said. AND TELL THEM YOU DO NOT HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!

The End

Hello there! This is Tracy, the author and star of the story!

I truly hope you've enjoyed the diary entries of the month of

June. In case you didn't get the clue, there will be a sequal to

the diary which will take place in a winter setting. Thank-you

for reading and reviewing! I hope you enjoyed it! LOOK FOR

THE SEQUAL COMING SOON!!

Tracy