Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin and all of his honorable friends are owned by Watsuki-san. I'm just letting my imagination take them for a little ride...

Author's Notes: Once again, I must thank Eriesalia for agreeing to beta read this fic. She's been a great help to me in beta reading most of my stories.

I must also thank Firuze of the RK Dreams Forum. She provided me with some of information about traveling in Japan during the Meiji era and some general geographic information about Japan. Any mistakes that I make in this story about traveling and Japan's geography are purely my own.

This story begins a month after Kenshin and his family and friends had their picnic on Mount Ueno, which takes place at the end of the manga.

Choices

By Amberle-chan

Chapter One

"Will I never find peace?" Aoshi Shinomori thought to his himself as he read the note in his hands for the fourth time. Normally, when such a message was put into his hands, he would have been on his way out of Kyoto immediately, but he still found himself staring at the piece of paper for several minutes, wondering if those he loved would forever be paying the debts for his past mistakes.

He reflected back on the last month since the picnic in Tokyo. He had actually enjoyed himself in the company of the Himura family, Megumi Takani, and Misao, even though he had spoken little, surprised that he now felt comfortable in the presence of all these people who called him "friend." It was even more shocking that they chose to think of him so highly, considering the immense pain he had caused them all in the past. It was their acceptance of him that had helped him move further into his own self-discovery that pain could be healed and forgotten, bringing him a new-found sense of peace and contentment.

Until the note had arrived early that morning, he had thought that he had finally found the peace he had been seeking for so long. This simple piece of paper was a reminder of one of his past mistakes, one which could never be forgotten, a responsibility that would he would carry until his death.

After he read the short letter one more time, he went to his room and began to pack. It was time to leave the Aoiya and go to Hokkaido, but he also knew that this time he could not go alone. He had to have help, but none of the Oniwabanshuu was capable of giving him the help he required. He needed special help, and he knew of only one person who could help him. Before he could go to Hokkaido, he would need to stop in Aizu first.

After he finished packing, he went to the Aoiya staff kitchen, looking for Okina, Misao, and the rest of the Oniwabanshuu, to let them know of his intentions and to say farewell. He was through with not telling people goodbye when he left; doing so in the past had caused too much pain. It was a mistake he never intended to repeat again.

Okina, Misao, Shiro, and Omasa were the only ones in the kitchen.

"Where are the others?" Aoshi asked.

"Kuro and Okon went to the market," Misao replied. "Is something wrong?"

"I must leave immediately for Hokkaido."

"Hokkaido?" Okina asked. "This is very sudden."

"I am summoned there."

One of Okina's eyebrows rose. Of all the Oniwaban, he was the only one who knew of Aoshi's reasons for traveling to Hokkaido, and it was a secret he had sworn to keep. All the others knew was that he went to Hokkaido at least two times a year, and that he always returned to Kyoto within a month.

"I may not be back for some time," Aoshi informed them. "It may be longer than a month this time."

"Winter will soon be here, Aoshi-sama," Misao said. "It's probably already winter up in Hokkiado. Are you sure that you cannot wait?"

"No, I must go immediately. And if it is still too difficult to travel, I will remain there until the spring," Aoshi answered.

Misao smiled sadly at him. She had given up asking him why he traveled to Hokkaido years ago, finally realizing that he would never tell her. "We will miss you, Aoshi-sama," she said.

Aoshi's face remained impassive, but his soul let just a trace of the deep sadness he felt darken his eyes. His trips to Hokkaido had been the reason he had always rejected the love she so freely gave him. He was unworthy of her love because of the responsibility he carried. She was also too young to help him, and still too young to understand. And if he ever revealed the truth, he knew that she would feel betrayed, her heart broken past the point of healing. He had betrayed her once to that near-breaking point; he would not do so again. How could he possibly allow himself to love her if he could never tell her of the burden of his heart?

"I will be back as soon as possible," Aoshi assured her. "Until then, farewell."

"Be safe, Aoshi-san," Shiro and Omasa said together.

"Have a safe journey, Aoshi-sama," Misao wished him. "Please be careful."

Aoshi nodded, bowed to them all, and left.

Misao stood up and walked over to Okina, who put a comforting arm around her shoulders. "Will he never tell us what is in Hokkaido, Jiya?" she asked. "He always looks so sad when he goes there."

"Perhaps someday, Misao."

"He looked even sadder today."

---

Megumi smiled happily to herself as she began to prepare to shut down the clinic. There had been very few patients requiring her medical services that morning, and slightly more than an hour after lunch, no one had appeared at all, so she decided to take up the rare chance of having an afternoon to herself and close the clinic early. She peered out of the window into the bright, early autumn sky. It was the perfect day to do a little shopping, and perhaps, if she had time, to gather some more herbs from the nearby woods before the first frost of the season settled in.

She was just taking off her smock when there was an insistent knocking on the clinic door. Sighing inwardly at the sudden loss of her shopping excursion, Megumi made her way to the clinic entrance and opened the door to find herself staring into the handsome face of Aoshi Shinomori.

"Shinomori-san!" she exclaimed, trying to hold back the wonder of seeing him on the clinic's doorstep. "I didn't know you would be visiting Aizu. You did not mention it at the picnic last month."

"No, I had no plans to then," Aoshi replied. "I need your help, Takani-sensei."

"Please come in, Shinomori-san," Megumi said as she opened the door wider to allow him entry into the clinic. "Is there something wrong?" Despite his outward cool exterior, she could tell that he was agitated about something. His deep blue eyes were troubled as they gazed back at her. The last time she had seen him so disturbed was nearly six years before at Kanryuu's mansion, on the night his men had given up their lives for his. "Has anything happened? Are you ill?"

He shook his head in reply and made no move to enter the clinic. "No, I am not ill, but I do need your help, Takani-sensei, as a physician. I need you to come with me to the monastery on Hokkaido."

Megumi's brown eyes widened in shock at this sudden and bold request. "I beg your pardon?" Megumi answered, "Why would I do that?"

Aoshi's hands clenched and unclenched at his sides. For only the second time in his life, he had to reveal his deepest secret, the one he had sworn no one else would ever know. Okina knew his secret only because he had made all of the arrangements in the first place. However, he had to inform her; it was the only way to convince her to accompany him.

"My son is ill."

Megumi's eyes widened even further in astonishment. "Your son?" she asked, not trying to hide the shock she felt from her voice. "You...have a child?"

"I will explain everything on the way," he replied. "Please, Takani-san, you are the only doctor I can trust in this matter."

Megumi took a calming breath and then stared up into his eyes, eyes that were normally cold, which were now pleading with her to go with him. "Perhaps I should make us some tea, Shinomori-san," she offered, "so we can discuss this calmly."

"No. There is no time," Aoshi stated. He reached into the breast pocket of his jacket and took out a much-folded piece of paper, which he handed to her. Megumi opened the note and read the short letter contained therein:

Shinomori-san:

Your son is gravely ill. We can do nothing further for him. We do not know how much longer he will live. Please come quickly.

Satoshi Furakawa, Abbot

She looked back up as she handed back the note to him. His fingers lightly brushed against hers, suddenly tightening around her hand. "Please, Megumi-san," he said softly. "You have some knowledge of western medicine, knowledge that the monks do not have. Perhaps you can save him. I will help you prepare whatever you need, but we must go quickly. There is a carriage waiting to take us to the train station."

She stared once more into his face, seeing something there she had thought she would never see in him. He was standing before her now, his façade of impassive coolness stripped away in his concern for his son. Aoshi Shinomori had a heart after all, and he had revealed it to her in an effort to save his son. How could she call herself a doctor and not answer his plea for help?

"Wait here," she instructed him. She turned back into the clinic and went into her office. She returned a few minutes later, and handed him two slips of paper. "One of these is a note to Dr. Nirishi. Do you know where his clinic is?" Aoshi nodded. "The note tells him that I'm going away on an emergency. Please deliver it. The other is a list of things I will need from some of the stores in town. I'll start to gather some other things together here while you get them. If I'm not here when you return, I've gone to my house to pack."

Aoshi's blue eyes softened with gratitude. "Thank you, Takani-sensei," he said with a deep bow before he hurried away down the street toward the main part of town.

---

Two hours later, Aoshi knocked on the door of Megumi's small house. She opened the door immediately and grabbed some of the many parcels that Aoshi was carrying to lay them out on a nearby table. "Were you able to get everything?" she asked as he entered the house. He nodded. "The monks probably have some of these already, but I'd rather be overly cautious in this case." She paused for a moment before looking up at him. She could feel his intense anxiety to leave, but she had a few more things to pack first. "Did Dr. Nirishi say anything about my leaving?"

"He said that he will glad to see your patients while you are away."

Megumi pushed some of her hair away from her face as she went into the kitchen. Aoshi followed her. "Good," she replied. She waved a hand toward the tea kettle on the stove. "Please have some tea, Shinomori-san. I'll only be a few more minutes and then we can leave."

"No, I'll go get the carriage," Aoshi said. Megumi turned back to reply but he was already gone.

---

By the time he returned with the carriage a little while later Megumi had carefully packed all of the medicines he had bought earlier in her trunk, and was laying her thickest cloak on top of the some books and other packages of herbs she decided to bring with her. She had no idea how long it would take to reach Hokkaido, but she did know that it would probably be quite cold when they arrived. She couldn't help wondering as she moved efficently around her house, packing things for this sudden and unexpected trip, wondering about Aoshi Shinomori, his son, and what that son was doing on Hokkaido and not living in Kyoto with the rest of the Oniwabanshuu. Questions flicked through her mind. How old was the boy? What was his name? Who was his mother? Aoshi had told her he would explain everything, but she had her doubts that so taciturn a man, a man who kept so many secrets, would answer all of her questions. She would have to keep her curiousity to a minimum and wait to see what he would reveal. One other question bothered her, but it had nothing to do with Aoshi Shinomori or his son. Why had she agreed to go with him without any forethought?Yes, she was a doctor, and she was answering a call to help heal someone, but this was Aoshi Shinomori after all. What had he done but cause her pain in their shared past? So why had she agree to help so readily? With no time to think over the situation properly, she shoved her question to the back of her mind to be pondered over at a later time.

Aoshi rapped on her door just as she closed the lid of her trunk. She walked hastily to the front of the house to let him in. The carriage driver was standing right behind him. "My trunk is the other room, Shinomori-san," Megumi said. "I just have to run over to my neighbor's house to let her know that I will be gone and then we can leave."

Minutes later, Megumi's neighbor was informed of her leaving on a personal emergency, her house was shuttered up and locked, her trunk placed on the back of the carriage, and Aoshi was helping her into the carriage.

As soon as she and Aoshi were settled in the carriage, it set off down the street at a steady pace toward the train station. "How will we get to Hokkaido, Shinomori-san?" Megumi asked.

"I believe the quickest way will be to go to Sendai," Aoshi replied. "From there, we can take a ship to Hakkodate. From there we can either have horses or a carriage transport us to the monastery. It is a three or four day trip from Hakkodate to the monastery, depending on how fast we travel." He paused momentarily to give her a considering look. "Can you ride, Takani-san?"

"Yes, I can ride." Megumi replied.

He nodded and said nothing more. They arrived at the train station several minutes later. At the train station, he purchased tickets to Osaka and then paid the carriage driver. They sat together in silence, waiting for nearly a half-hour before the train finally came chugging into the station. A train porter carried Megumi's trunk and Aoshi's bags into a first-class compartment, leaving them alone after only two minutes.

Aoshi said nothing further during this entire time, and Megumi, knowing him as well as she did, decided not to ask the questions that were plaguing her and remained silent as well. Aoshi would explain everything to her in his own good time. She would be patient.

Aoshi appreciated her silence and admired her patience. He realized that she was very curious about his son, but he was grateful that she had not brought up the subject. He did not wish to discuss the matter until they had some measure of privacy. During the silent ride in the carriage, he watched her surreptiously and wondered briefly about her willingness to accompany him on this journey. There had no been discussion, no arguments. He had been the cause of so much of her past sorrow and pain, and yet she was willing to help him and his son. He was amazed at her kindness, something he did not deserve.

The train pulled out of the station scant minutes later, and Megumi settled into the seat across from Aoshi and watched the scenery outside the window slip by. Fifteen minutes into the trip, the conductor arrived and collected their tickets and then closed the compartment door behind him. Another two minutes of silence filled the air until Aoshi finally spoke.

"His name is Takeo."

Megumi turned her full attention to him, waiting for him to continue. Aoshi sighed and looked away, suddenly finding it hard to look at her while he explained the situation.

"Two years before the Oniwabanshuu began to work for Kanryu Takeda, I had a short liasion with a woman in Tokyo. Takeo was the result of that union. She died giving him birth."

"Then he would be about eight years old?" Megumi asked.

"Hai." Aoshi remained silent for several moments, his attention on the scenery outside the train. Megumi fidgeted momentarily before she finally let her curiousity get the best of her.

"Why is he in a monastery on..." she began to say.

"Hokkaido and not at the Aoiya in Kyoto?" Aoshi finished the question for her. He turned from the window to face her, his blue eyes burning intensely. "I did not want him brought up among other Oniwaban. It is not a life for any child. It was the mistake I made with Misao. I had never wanted her to be Oniwabanshuu, and yet she is. It's in her blood now. I did not want to repeat the same mistake with my son."

Megumi nodded in understanding. "But why so far away?" she asked. "You could have easily left him in Tokyo and no one would have known."

Aoshi's head dropped slightly, his long, black bangs hiding his eyes. "I sometimes wonder why I made that decision, but at the time it seemed the best thing to do," he replied slowly. "I did not want to take the chance that the rest of the clan would discover his existence. Hokkaido seemed a far enough distance away to make sure that that would never happen. Okina is the only other person besides yourself who knows of Takeo. He helped arrange for him to live at the monastery."

Megumi nodded again. Quiet descended in the compartment. They both remained mute for a long time, each lost in their own respective thoughts. Megumi understood that Aoshi was normally a quiet man who did not speak unless he felt there was a need, but perhaps with a little prodding on her part, she could engage him in some conversation. Otherwise, the long trip to Hokkaido would be filled with endless silences. The safest topic of conversation, for now, seemed to be his son.

"Do you visit him often?" she asked softly after nearly an hour of stillness.

Aoshi had been meditating, but he did not seemed startled by her sudden question. "I go to Hokkaido two or three times a year."

Megumi nodded in understanding at his answer. He had told her all that she needed to know, just the basics of the situation, but she also felt like he was holding something back from her; he was hesitating at revealing everything to her. She sat back into the seat, making herself more comfortable. He would tell her when he was ready. The silent minutes flew by and she was just beginning to nod off into a doze, when she realized what he had not told her. One question would confirm her suspicions. She straightened in her seat and turned to face Aoshi fully. His eyes were closed; he was meditating again.

"Aoshi-san."

His eyes slowly opened. He was slightly startled by the intensity of her gaze and the use of his first name. It was something she had rarely done before.

"Forgive me for my boldness," Megumi said firmly, "but I feel I must ask this." She paused for only a second before continuing. "Does Takeo know that you are his father?"

Aoshi's head fell forward. "No," he replied quietly after several seconds of silence. "He knows me only as his sponsor who pays for his upkeep at the monastery."

"But why...?"

Aoshi then looked back up at her, his crystal eyes locking onto hers. "You, more than anyone else, know of my dishonorable past, Takani-san. I will not inflict that upon him."

"I understand," she replied. Megumi more than understood his reasons. Her own past was the one of the reasons she had chosen not to marry, despite the many suitors who pursued her. How could she let any child face the contempt of the world because their mother was a criminal?

They lapsed back into silence again.