The Old Songs

This is the first of my song POVs. I got the idea from another fic. Try to guess who the characters are!

Disclaimer: I do not own FF9 and I did not write any of these songs (though sometimes I wish I did!). The only thing I own is shiny pennies...ooh! Shiny! Shiny!

The Old Songs

I sit in an empty table, in an empty room in a bar.

Candles burning, glasses are chilled

And soon...she’ll be by.

The light is dim and a musk smell of smoke wafts in through the thin sheets of glass they call “windows”.

Will she come? What will she say? What will I say?

Hope and pray

She’ll say that she’s willing to give us...another try.

I haven’t seen her in ages. I don’t know what she thinks of me. What if she hates me?

No, I have to be strong. She can’t make me break down this easily...

And if all these I’ve made don’t melt the lady’s heart

I’ll put on the old 45’s...

And maybe the old songs

Will bring back the old times

Yeah. Not that I can remember them much. Not at all in fact.

Maybe the old lines will sound new

Maybe she’ll lay her head on my shoulder

Maybe old feelings will come through

Does she still have feelings for me? I have feelings for her. Though when I realised I did...

Maybe we’ll start to cry

And wonder why

We ever walked away.

She didn’t walk away. I did though. I didn’t realise I loved her. I left her there, the rain pouring down on her head. And when I looked back for a moment, she had already broken down, crying.

She’s supposed to be strong. That’s what I used to say: strong people don’t cry. At least that’s what people say I said. I don’t know. I’m hopeless.

Maybe the old songs will bring back the old times

And make her wanna stay

I love her so much. But it maybe too late. After a year I left, I started thinking about her. And dreaming about her. About her long hair and eyes that sparkled in the moonlight. Soon enough I was thinking about her so much I saw her face everywhere.

And now I’m here.

It’s been too long since I saw her face light up

When I come home

It’s been too many hours I’ve wasted

Just staring...at the phone

What for? As far as I know I have no past to talk about.

No, I did. She always used to tell me my past. Her voice sounded like an angel! Why? Why did I leave her?

Sweet old songs, I’m counting on ya

To bring her back to me

I’m tired of listening alone...

I stare at the floor, questions jolting through my head like a thousand volts. I hear a door open and close. Footsteps come towards me. I suddenly see a pair of feet. My heart beating non-stop, I look up slowly.

It’s her. She’s come.

“Hi.” She says.

“H...I” I stammer. There is an awkward pause.

I offer a seat to her. She sits down next to me.

I don’t dare look away.

She looks as beautiful as I remember. Her eyes meet mine and for a while we stare at each other.

I want her so much.

Maybe the old songs

Will bring back the old times

Maybe the old lines will sound new

“How long has it been?” she asks. I shrug

“I don’t know.” I reply. She sighs and gazes round. Her nose twitches as the unpleasant smell of booze and fags reaches her.

“Sorry,” I apologise, “but this was the only place I could afford.”

“It’s ok.” She says.

But it isn’t ok.

Why won’t she be mine? I asked Eiko to tell her to meet me here. I didn’t tell her why. I would sound silly if I told Eiko how much I loved...her.

She’s looking at me now, frowning slightly.

“Aren’t you cold?” she asks. I shake my head.

She raises her eyebrows. “It’s freezing,” she says, shivering. “I didn’t bring a coat!”

“Here, take mine.” I give her my coat.

Maybe she’ll lay her head on my shoulder

She looks up at me as she puts my coat on.

“Thanks.” She murmurs.

Why am I being such a coward? Why can’t I tell her how much I love her, and how much I want her?

Because I’m scared. Scared that she might reject me, and walk away. Even though that’s what I deserve.

Maybe old feelings will come through

I sit back down next to her in a red seat, slightly nervous.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, concern embeddened on her face.

I have to tell her. I open my mouth but the words don’t come out. I had planned the right thing to say, it was right there on my tongue, but now...just silence...

Maybe we’ll start to cry

And wonder why

We ever walked away

Maybe the old songs will bring back the old times

“Are you sure you’re ok?” she asks. She lays her hand onto mine and holds it softly. My heart is beating so hard, I swear it will burst.

And make her wanna stay

WHY CAN’T I BLOODY SAY THE BLEEDING WORDS?????

I’m so hopeless. There’s only one thing left.

The music starts playing. I close my eyes and a second later open them again. Her eyes widen. She remembers.

“Oh” she says. “That was the song that we...used to...dance to...” her voice trails off as she catches a tear falling down my cheek.

I can’t cry now. I can’t. Not now. Not when I’ve got so far.

And make her wanna stay

Who am I kidding? WHO AM I KIDDING???

“Are you alright?” she asks. I nod, furiously wiping away the tears. A stray tear falls down from my eye and she gently wipes it away.

Before she can take her hand back I grab it.

She looks at me with a mixture of surprise and confusion. Still gripping her hand tightly, I move closer to her and kiss her.

Wanna stay

She pulls back gently, and puts her hand to her mouth, as if she can’t believe what she’s just done.

Why did I do that? I’m shocked myself.

“I...”she starts. I interrupt her. It’s either now or never.

“I love you more than words can say.” I whisper.

We kiss again, but this time it’s longer than the first one. I wrap my arms around her, she feels so warm against me. Our lips and mouths wander, and I can feel her heartbeat against mine. Two heartbeats beating as one.

My fingers tangle up her hair, but she doesn’t mind.

After about five minutes (or longer) we break apart. It’s her turn to cry now. I smile lovingly at her and wipe the tears from her eyes.

Maybe we’ll start to cry

And wonder why

We ever walked away

“What did we do wrong?” she sobbed against my shoulder.

“It wasn’t you! It was me. I didn’t realise I loved you until after I left you. I’m so sorry!” I confess, tears already streaming down my cheeks.

The songs worked.

We laugh with each other and decide to leave

Maybe the old songs will bring back the old times

And make her wanna stay.

We get to the door.

“Oh, another thing...” I say. She turns and looks at me. “What?” she asks.

“I love you...Freya.” I smile.

She beams back at me. “I love you too...Fratley. But you don’t have to say it all the time!”

“But I want to!” I say. “I want to yell so loudly the angels will hear that...I LOVE FREYA CRESCENT!!!”

She laughs at my demonstration.

And with that we leave the bar, hand in hand. Ready to start again, the old songs in our memories.

sniff I think I’m going to cry now...burst into baby like tears

I enjoyed writing this. Bet I fooled you over whom the characters are, didn’t I? I like Freya/Fratley stuff because just because he lost his memory (get the little hint about “no past”?) doesn’t mean he can’t fall in love with Freya all over again!