Who I Am

By AngeLhearteD

Chapter V: Breaking the Ice

Kai stood on the dock, his arms folded across his chest, gazing out to sea. He had been standing alone, deep in thought, for fifteen minutes.

His amethyst eyes travelled over the waves as they rose and fell. The effect was almost hypnotic, but Kai made sure to stand well away from the edge of the dock.

He had no desire to fall in.

The wind whipped his slate-hair into his eyes and face and the trails of his scarf danced behind him like white banners. The seagulls were cawing high up in the air and mist surrounded the dock. In the distance, Kai could see large ships approaching to land at the harbour.

Then, the sudden sound of footsteps snapped the young man out of his thoughts and his head rose slightly, as he listened. They were approaching him from behind. Had Tala arrived already?

Wait…thought Kai. Those footsteps are familiar, but they don't belong to who I'm waiting for…they're heavier and slower…

Without turning around or looking back in any way, Kai spoke up over the sounds of the wind, the waves and the seagulls.

'I came here to be alone, Hiro!'

The footsteps stopped, and a voice replied flatly:

'You may fool your friends, Kai, but I see right through you.'

Kai silently cursed. He had to give the older Granger some credit. Hiro was most definitely smarter than his younger brother Tyson, not to mention more sensible and mature.

How did he know I'd be here? He can't have followed me…Kai thought. Then he reasoned that there were only two possibilities. Hiro had either seen Kai leave the training centre and followed him, or he'd been searching for Kai, and someone had told him they'd seen Kai heading for the harbour. Since Kai always knew whether someone was following him or not, he guessed the second option was much more likely.

'You're leaving the team, aren't you.' It was more of a statement than a question. Hiro sounded like he knew the answer and had known it all along.

Kai closed his eyes briefly, drawing in a deep breath. Then he opened them again and looked over his shoulder at the taller and older young man who stood behind him. He met Hiro's gaze and unfolded his arms, turning to face Tyson's older brother squarely.

Hiro stared back, his arms by his sides. For a moment, the two just looked at each other, and all was silent except for the crashing noise of the waves against the platform they stood on. Cold water rose up and sprayed both young men lightly.

This is it…Kai thought. The moment of truth…I left a withdrawal letter for Mr. Dickenson; Hiro doesn't need to know who I'm quitting the team for…yet.

No words were spoken. None were needed. Hiro looked into Kai's face and understood instantly. Kai could convey his emotions with a single look, and he was doing just that at that precise moment.

So…Hiro thought. It's come to this…

Lowering his gaze and breaking eye contact, Kai bowed his head slightly, silently signalling to Hiro that he was right in his assumption. Then, without saying a word, Kai Hiwatari walked forward and passed the blue-haired young man, his eyes closed, his posture straight and dignified, and his hands clenched into tight fists by his sides.

Kai's entire body language was one that warned not to be questioned over his actions, and not to be stopped in any way. Hiro let him pass; staring ahead at the sea and its crashing waves, his features set hard, his mouth a grim line. He knew he couldn't stop Kai or make the seventeen-year-old reconsider, even if he wanted to. Once Kai's mind was made up, it rarely, if ever, changed its course.

And, unlike other beybladers, Kai could not be intimidated or forced to do or comply with anything other than what he wanted to do and his own rules.

'Thought so.' Hiro added, as the youth continued down the rest of the platform. As the mist obscured him, Kai heard Hiro's final word and felt nothing: no guilt, no satisfaction, nothing.

'Goodbye.'

Hiro looked over his shoulder, gritting his teeth. Kai had completely vanished. Even the sound of his light footsteps had gone. Hiro was angry, but there was nothing for it. He had guessed that Kai would quit, it was unfortunate, but inevitable. Turning back in the direction he had come, Hiro Granger prepared himself to convey the shocking news to his bother and what remained of the former Bladebreakers team.

Tala was on time. He knew he was. He had to be, because he was never, ever late. He took time limits very seriously, as he did pretty much everything else.

He was on time, but Kai wasn't.

How typical, Tala thought, as he stared out at the blue sea. That spoilt Hiwatari brat has absolutely no sense of time at all!

The redhead sat at the edge of one of the platforms in the harbour, his legs hanging in mid air, high above water. The rippling effects of water caused by the wind didn't make him feel dizzy at all. In fact, they soothed him.

In his left hand, he held the note and quietly he waited for its writer to show.

Kai frowned slightly. With all this mist, he wouldn't find Tala unless he literally bumped into him. He had noticed that the platforms had numbers. Kai stopped, irritated.

I should have specified a number…he could be anywhere…he thought impatiently.

Turning his head to the right, Kai strained to make out anything beyond the mist. Strange how the air back at the hotel was so clear, but so different close to sea.

He heard the sound of running footsteps and turned his head back to the left, to see the figures of two young children running towards him. One was a boy, about nine years old, and the other, a little girl of about seven or eight years.

'Adam, we're going the wrong way, daddy said we have to go and tell mama he's bringing dinner back…!'

'I don't care I'm going to see, too!'

'Beybladin' is sooo stupid!' The girl whined.

'Shut up Lynn, it so is not!'

'Is too, Tyson always wins!'

'This year he won't win!'

'So who is gonna win, Adam?'

'Ray and Max left the team so Tyson will be weaker!' Adam replied.

'He's still got Kai!'

Not anymore…Kai thought, as the children skipped past him.

'Kai always loses in finals!' The boy scoffed. Kai looked after him and his brows rose slightly.

I do not! Do I…?

'No, Kai is the best!' The little girl defended.

'All the girls like Kai because of his face, not his beyblading!' The boy called back to her.

Kai listened, mildly amused, though his face remained expressionless.

'But he's ugly and he looks stupid with his stupid blue paint!'

Kai stared in disbelief, despite the fact it was only a child who was insulting him.

Ugly? You're stepping way over the line, kid…

'No, not all the girls, Amy likes Tala!' Lynn slowed down, clutching her side as if she had a cramp.

'Let's go, Lynn, let's go, Amy said she saw him on the platform!'

They know where Tala is? Kai realised and acted quickly.

'Hey!' He called out after them. The kids stopped, and looked back. They stared at Kai for a moment, and then the boy pointed. Kai noticed he had a toy launcher and a beyblade in his hand.

'That looks like Kai.' The little girl commented to her brother.

'That is Kai! It's Kai, that's Kai!' He grabbed his sister's arm, shaking the poor girl in his excitement.

Kai beckoned them over and the children slowly approached him. The little girl was holding a small book and a pen and she held it up to Kai, in a gesture that asked for his autograph.

'Are you really Kai?'

Kai looked at her and then at her brother, who was gazing up at him in awe.

'I always lose in finals, kid?'

The boy went red and stammered 'N…n…no…'

'My brother called you ugly.' The girl stated, her big eyes blinking up innocently at Kai.

'Lynn!' Her brother hissed, looking terrified. 'Shut up!'

'What? But you did.' His sister replied.

Kai merely narrowed his eyes at the boy, though silently he found the boy's nervousness amusing.

'…I heard.' He replied flatly.

'I…I didn't mean it.' The boy stuttered. 'You look…really cool…r…really! You're so tall!'

Kai wasn't interested in talking to fans, even ones as small as the children standing in front of him. He decided to cut to the chase.

'Where's Tala?'

'…On platform seven.' The boy replied, obviously star-struck that he was actually talking to a beyblader he usually only saw on TV.

'Did you see him?' Kai demanded.

'…N…no…Amy…did…she phoned home and told us…'

Kai looked up. He currently stood on platform three. Platform seven was quite a walk away, and Kai had been walking enough already. Then an idea formed in his mind as he looked back down at the children.

'K…Kai…' The boy snatched the book of his sister. 'Please…can you sign my book?'

'It's mine!' The little girl exclaimed, trying to snatch it back.

'Sign for us!' The boy pushed her away and held the book out to Kai. 'You're such a cool blader!'

Kai looked at the book, and then at the boy. 'Find Tala, tell him to come here, and I'll sign.'

'…Okay!' The boy nodded. 'I promise I'll find him and tell him! Will you sign for me?'

Kai took the book and hurriedly signed, handing it back with the pen once he was done.

'Oh cool!' The boy exclaimed excitedly. 'This is so cool! I have Kai's autograph, I actually have his autograph! Mama and dad are not gonna believe it!'

'It's my book!' The girl complained. 'Give me it!'

'…' Kai leant back against the metal railing that lined platform three. 'I'm on platform three.' He told them, and then folded his arms.

The boy nodded. 'Cool! He'll sign for me too! I'll tell him…thanks so much Kai, you're awesome!'

Kai nodded. 'Hurry up.'

The two kids nodded and then turned and ran off, yelling at each other.

'It's my book, it's my pen!' The little girl cried.

'He signed for me, you don't even like beyblades!' Her brother argued.

'No, give it back!'

'Whoever finds Tala first will keep it!'

'NO!'

Kai looked away and tilted his head back, staring up at the blue sky. He hoped the little children would run as fast as they talked. Still, it was better they were going all the way than him. Kai had had enough of searching. He now settled to wait.

Tala glared at the water. Had he been set up?

I hope not…because I'm not nice when I'm angry! I'm not nice at all! He thought angrily.

He had been sitting and waiting for more than ten minutes now. Hardly patient by nature, Tala was on the brink of just getting up and leaving.

Maybe I'm the one on the wrong platform…he never said which one…maybe I should go and check the others, but platforms one, two and three are such a long walk away…

Then he thought: What if it's not even Kai…? I'm assuming…no...it has to be…

Just as he finished thinking this, he heard a gasp, and then a squeal. He turned his face to the left to find two girls, a blonde and a brunette, of about twelve or thirteen years of age.

'Oh my God, Amy, it's really him!' The blonde cried.

Tala stared at them. It was bad enough that people always stared at him when he was walking down the streets. He almost always got followed, but Spencer and Bryan were usually with him, to help scare away the crowds. On his way to the harbour, Tala had taken many side-paths and empty alleys to avoid attracting attention. The last thing he wanted was the press reporting he was at the docks meeting some girls.

Luckily, it was misty and he doubted anyone could see him anyway.

He stood up, deciding it was definitely time to leave. He didn't care who the note was from; he was tired of waiting, and he was most certainly not in the mood for infatuated fan-girls.

He got enough of them in Russia.

The brunette, Amy, looked like she was about to faint. But she managed to speak.

'…You're really…Tala Ivanov…the famous beyblader?'

'No.' Tala snapped. 'I'm his twin!'

'…Tala…has a twin?' The blonde looked confused.

They actually believe me…? How stupid…Tala thought. He glared, as the brunette stepped closer to him. Her face was flushed and she looked happy, too happy for Tala's liking.

'No…it's him…gosh, you're so…oh my God, will you sign for me? I'm waiting for my little sister to bring the book!' Amy exclaimed.

Maybe if I get her close enough to the edge, she'll fall off and leave me alone…Tala thought evilly. But he replied:

'…I've got things to do.' He walked past her and her friend.

But a hand grabbed hold of his left arm, and he was pulled back.

Tala looked over his shoulder to find the brunette looking up at him with huge, star-struck eyes.

'No! Don't go…just a few minutes…I'm your biggest fan, Tala! You beyblade so well!'

Tala sneered. 'Ha! I doubt that's the reason why you're a fan!' He said, pulling his arm out of the girl's grasp.

'We totally back your team!' The blonde cried. 'Your team rule!'

'Really…' Tala said sneered. 'If you're both such big fans of mine, what's my beyblade called?'

'…Uh…it's that wolf!' The blonde said.

'…That wolf…has a name…' Tala glared.

'Wolborg!' Amy exclaimed. 'And your team are the Demolition Boys!'

'A real fan would know the name of my new team, and the name of my special attack!' Tala challenged.

Both girls exchanged glances. Tala instantly knew they had no idea. No, they weren't fans of his because of his skills as a beyblader. They admired him for his looks and that was all.

Tala turned his back to them again and then began to walk away.

'Do something Cassie, he's getting away!' He heard Amy hiss behind him.

'What? He's so gorgeous! His eyes are so much more gorgeous in real life!' Cassie whispered back.

Pathetic…Tala thought.

'Wait…Tala…!' Amy called after him, and both girls ran to catch up with him. 'I just want your autograph!'

'No book, no signature.' Tala retorted coldly.

'Please…my sister is coming…' Amy pleaded, reaching out to grab his arm again.

But Tala was expecting this and evaded, and then he turned and glared at her, furious.

'Listen, kid, you better leave me alone or you'll be sorry!'

'B…but…we're thirteen!' The blonde stammered, when Amy suddenly pointed behind Tala.

'There she is! Lynn!'

'Sis, sis, we got the book! Ah!' A little boy and girl ran up to Tala and joined the other older girls. Both children stopped and looked at Tala, in disbelief.

'Oh COOL!' The boy exclaimed. 'It's really Tala, so cool!'

'Wolfie!' The little girl grinned gleefully. Amy snatched the book of the boy and held it out to Tala.

'…Please…two autographs for me and my friend…!' She opened a page and held out a pen.

'And for me!' The boy cried. 'I'm your biggest fan! The Blitzkrieg Boys are so gonna win!'

Tala glared. This was ridiculous. 'I didn't come all this way to meet a bunch of kids!' He snapped, irritated.

'Then what are you doing here?' Cassie asked nervously.

'That's none of your concern.' Tala grabbed the book, scribbled his signature a few times, hastily, and then chucked the book back at Amy along with the pen.

She looked down at the signature in disbelief, delight all over her face.

'You've got your signature, now leave me alone!' Tala ordered in his most serious and cold tone of voice.

The girls finally seemed to realise that they were treading on thin ice in terms of Tala's patience, and they nodded.

'Thanks so much, Tala!' Amy smiled. 'I'll be rooting for you at the finals!'

'So will I!' Cassie nodded. Tala nodded stifly at them, and they began to hurry away, but not without glancing back at him a few times as they did so.

The children followed after them, but then, suddenly the boy stopped and began to run back to Tala.

What now? Tala thought.

'…Oh yeah, oh yeah, I promised, Kai's waiting for you!'

Tala's eyes widened. 'Huh? Did you say Kai?'

'I saw him on platform three, he told me to tell you he was there!' The boy nodded. 'I almost forgot!'

'…' Tala couldn't believe it. So he had to walk all the way to platform three? It was quite a distance away.

He nodded to the boy, who smiled and then turned and ran after the girls.

Why that…that…lazy…Tala shook his head and turned in the opposite direction, to make his way to platform three.

Kai sat on the top of the thin metal railing, perfectly balanced, his eyes closed, his hands gripping onto the metal for extra security. He listened to the sound of the waves and the wind. He had no idea how long he had been waiting for, but somehow, he knew Tala was on his way.

No sooner had he thought this, he sensed someone coming up behind him.

Tala stopped quietly next to some hand-rails, after seeing a familiar figure perched up on the edge of railings that were higher up.

Ha. So here he is…Moving as silently as he could, Tala meant to climb up and sneak up on Kai and pretend to push him off, when Kai's voice spoke up, without even turning around.

'Don't even think about it.'

'…' Tala was disappointed his plan had failed as he glared up at Kai. 'I ought to push you off and leave you to drown! Do you know how long I've been waiting? Do you know what I've just been through?'

Kai opened his eyes, but didn't move.

'So are you going to show off all day, or will you come down here so we can settle this?' Tala demanded.

Kai finally moved, turning his head to the left to look back down at Tala over his shoulder. He wondered what Tala had meant by his going through something statement.

Tala went on to answer Kai's silent question regardless, holding up Kai's scrunched up note and pointing at it with his other hand. 'Thanks to your inability to specify an exact location, I was harassed by a bunch of kids! Not only that, you sent a kid to tell me where you were! And then I had to come all this way!'

Kai casually got off the railing and then, in one, swift, sudden motion, pushed himself away and jumped down, landing in a crouching position right in front of Tala. Tala was momentarily shocked. It hadn't been an easy jump to make, but Kai had made it with the skill of a trained gymnast. As he landed, the trails of his white scarf slowly floated down behind him, and then Kai stood up, and looked right into Tala's face.

His amethyst eyes met Tala's blue ones, and Tala put his hands on his hips. 'Show off.' He glared. 'It wouldn't have been half so spectacular if you'd mistimed it and broken you bones.'

'Hn…I didn't.' Kai replied, and then stepped back a few paces to put distance between them again.

Tala shook his head, dropped his arms, and then began, more seriously: 'You wanted to see me?'

Kai folded his arms and looked away. Then, taking a deep breath, he replied: 'I sent a letter of withdrawal to BBA headquarters.'

Tala stared at him.

'Really.' He said flatly.

Kai looked at him again.

'So…you're quitting beyblading…again?' Tala asked.

'I'm quitting team BBA.' Kai responded.

Tala dared to hope, but made sure his expression gave nothing away.

'Hmmm. Do they know?'

'They will. Soon.'

'I see…' Tala said, and then began slowly 'And this…requires my attention for what purpose exactly?'

'…' Kai gritted his teeth. 'Don't play stupid.'

Tala stared at him, and then folded his arms. 'What do you want, Kai? What's your aim?'

My aim? What's he talking about? Kai wondered, but decided to answer in the safest way.

'I want to win the championship.' Kai replied, matter-of-factly.

'Hmmm. Alone.' Tala murmured.

Kai looked at the red-haired young man who stood before him and for the first time, doubts began to race in his mind. What if Tala wouldn't take him back on board? What if he had actually misjudged Tala and made a mistake? What options would he have then?

Tala didn't look too eager to accept him back. The redhead looked away from Kai, directing his gaze to the blue sea. Everything had led to this moment; their childhood together, the Russian finals two years earlier, the meeting in the hotel, the talk in the garden.

Kai had obviously done some thinking, and Tala knew very well why the slate-haired young man was here, now.

I have two options. Tala thought. I can turn him away and get him back for all the times he's ditched my team. But what would that accomplish? Snubbing Kai may bring me momentary satisfaction, but what then? I'd rather fight with Kai than against him. He'd be a difficult opponent to defeat in the tournament…damn it.

Tala thought about everything that he had been through with Kai in their entire years of knowing each other. Then he silently sighed, knowing he really didn't have a choice at all. With Kai by his side…the Blitzkrieg Boys would be unbeatable.

'Kai…' He began again. 'I know you have other reasons why you're doing this…I don't believe you'd ever willingly come back to us if you had another choice.'

It was Kai's potential reasons that worried Tala. He didn't know them, and he knew Kai would not tell him even if he asked. Sure enough, Tala got no response.

He looked back at Kai, his eyes narrowing. 'How do I know you won't jump ship again?'

Kai hated being questioned. But he knew Tala had every right to be cautious around him.

'…Because for once…we want the same thing.' Kai replied.

'Hmmm.' Tala agreed, his eyes lowering. 'I suppose that's a point.'

Kai waited, looking at Tala's face, trying to search for hints as to what the redhead was thinking. But Tala never showed emotions and Kai couldn't read anything.

Tala thought about Bryan and Spencer and how they would react when they knew Kai was going to be part of the team again. He knew they wouldn't like it at all. However, as team captain, Tala knew he had to face the full responsibility for all his actions.

And he was now thinking not in terms of his own selfish thoughts, but of what was best for his team. Accepting Kai was the best decision, no matter what way he looked at it.

He really had no choice.

'…So this is what you want?' Tala looked at Kai again. 'To win the finals…for the Blitzkrieg Boys? Think carefully Kai. Because I won't let you leave this team again so long as I'm standing.'

Tala was smart, Kai had to admit. He knew Tala's threat was not empty; he'd find a way of messing up Kai's plans if he needed to. Tala was giving him an opportunity to change his mind.

Kai's mind had already been settled.

He didn't want to win the tournament for the Blitzkrieg Boys. He wanted to win for himself, to prove something to himself and to everyone, to the fans, and especially to Tyson.

'With the Blitzkrieg Boys.' Kai replied.

Tala stared for a long, hard moment at him, as if he still thought this was all a big joke. When Kai said nothing back, Tala unfolded his arms.

'…I always knew you'd come to your senses eventually…' He began, and a small smirk formed on his lips. He supposed he should be flattered; Kai had chosen his team because he believed he could go the distance with the Blitzkrieg Boys.

Kai stared back at him, his expression blank.

Then this is it…Tala thought. Bryan will have to move over…sorry Bryan…I still can't believe Kai's actually doing this…I'm not complaining though…

'Welcome back to our team, Kai.' Slowly and hesitantly, Tala held out his right hand in a gesture of goodwill.

Kai's eyes lowered, looking at the outstretched hand that waited to be accepted. He didn't like shaking hands, in fact, he hated it, but this was Tala, and Kai had known Tala for a very, very long time.

They were compatriots. And now, team-mates once again.

He unfolded his arms and extended his own right hand, slipping it into Tala's, gripping at the precise moment Tala's fingers closed around his own hand.

The smirk on Tala's face turned into a genuine smile. He looked…happy. Kai blinked, looking into the face of the person he had known all his life.

Perhaps, on his way to getting what he wanted, he would finally feel like he was part of a team he really belonged to. Perhaps he could find the same pride of representing his country that Max and Ray had spoken of. Perhaps he would finally learn who he was.

Slowly, Kai Hiwatari offered a small and rare smile back.

Author's Note:

Well, that concludes this little story. I did want to put Bryan and Spencer's reactions, but it would have ended up too much like Blitzkrieg Boy. So read that for the reactions : ) Thanks for all your kind reviews. I hope you've enjoyed reading as much as I have typing this. Please tell me what you thought of this last chapter, I was trying to add subtle humour, lol. Thanks again, and I'll probably write more one-shots after I give some love to my main FF8 fic again.