FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination 
mobile edition
Empty Lorelai
Author of 9 Stories |
A/N: Okay, guys. It's been a long ride through this story, and I've appreciated every single piece of feedback you've ever given me. This story has been with me for a long time, and I really loved writing it. A lot of things have happened this year with me, and it's changed me. I'm sure you can see that in how I changed parts of my writing, and I hope it's been for the better. Improving as a writer is tough, and we do it very slowly. I was so proud of my old Friends fanfictions, but as I read them a year later, I quickly deleted them. This fic has been here for a long time, and I'm excited to finish it. On my future here at fanfiction: I've been writing here for a long time, and I intend to write many more fanfictions. I'll be writing something soon, maybe even in the next week or so that I'll start regularly updating so I hope that you guys will all stay with me…
Thank you for reading Turning Around. It's been an extraordinary experience, and without all the reviews I probably wouldn't have finished it.
Disclaimer: NNNNOOOOOO! I don't own these characters. However, Amy Sherman Palladino and the WB do…Nor do I own any of the lyrics to the songs.
One last thing: The lyrics I'm going to use are going to be from several Patty Griffin songs. Check her music out sometime, she's great.
Lorelai is sitting at her kitchen counter, drinking wine. She's tried to calm herself down several ways, but so far drinking is all that's proving effective. So that's what she does. So far, this is her third glass of wine. She wishes that he hadn't showed up. In her life, she's wished a lot of things…Somehow; wishing has never worked on her.
This is a rare moment for Lorelai. Alex and Eva are both asleep, and she has time. She knows she can't leave them alone, but she needs to take a walk or something. So she decides to check her mailbox, it's quick and she can at least momentarily leave the apartment. She checks to see if she has her keys, then slowly makes her way down the stairs.
In the mailroom, she meanders through the aisles while trying to find her box. She can't stand her apartment, she doesn't want to go back and feel lonely. A man smiles whose opening the mailbox close to her. She smiles back, and suddenly she feels a spark. Even just a little one. She needs something to occupy her.
He has blonde hair, and beautiful deep brown eyes.
"I'm Lorelai." She says, making the first move.
"It's really nice to meet you, I'm James." He gives her that great smile again. There's a heat, it's small but it's a heat. She steps closer and suddenly she's putting her arms around him and kissing him He pulls back.
"I have an apartment upstairs." She whispers, "Hence the mailbox."
"I have one here, too." He says, his voice sexy.
"Really? Cause' I thought you just came here to make out with random women in mailrooms." James laughs at her sarcasm.
"Okay, we'll go to your apartment…This isn't too much for you, is it?" Lorelai takes a moment to think. She might be about to jump into bed with a serial murder. Then she thinks about Luke… She shakes her head.
"No, I'm fine…" He smiles.
"Show me the way…" She takes his hand, and leads him to the elevator.
Turned away again and I waved goodbye
In an envelope, inside his coat
Is a chain I wore, around my throat
Along with, a note I wrote
Said "I love you but, I don't even know why"
"I need to go…to that." He sighs, and shakes his head.
"I don't know if this is going to work." James says, hearing the increasing cries. She nods.
"I know." She turns around and walks to the cribs, picking both Alex and Eva in her arms and rocking them. She realizes it now. They're her responsibility, and she's okay with that. An hour later, she walks back into her room. It's 3AM, and she's content with herself, in a way. She sits on her bed, and goes over the night's events. She wishes James never happened. The void is back. She puts her head in her hands, and rocks slowly back and forth. Slow whimpers come from her. When she takes her head out of her hands, she wipes her face.
I spit, I spit in the eye
I tear, I tear out my heart
and I scatter the bits
I stay unseen by the light
I stay untold by the truth
I'm sold by a lie
By this I am able in all of my travels
To make these memories quit
But tonight I clearly recall every little bit
Every day after work, he walks to Lorelai's apartment. He watches as she walks in. Every day she grows thinner; yet…Every day she becomes more beautiful to him. She's more serious now; she lives in a corporate world. He wonders if she sees him when she walks in.
And finally, he musters the courage to ring her doorbell. There are two babies in her arms, his babies. He's astonished by them, they're beautiful.
"Eva and…" He stops. He doesn't even know the name of his son. Luke is completely humiliated about this, he's a failure as a father. She shakes her head.
"His name is Alex, Luke. If you were there when I gave birth to them maybe you would know." She looks down, and with all the strength she has she says, "Why are you here? Stay away from me."
"Well…" Her hostility is hurting him, bit by bit. "I moved here. I live five blocks from your apartment. I want to help raise my children. I'm not going to let you close that door on me, you know that's wrong Lorelai. I want a plan. I want joint custody." Lorelai opens her door, letting Luke in.
Silently, Lorelai hands Alex and Eva to Luke. She grabs a bag and walks into another room. Luke is still in awe. He smiles every time they move; every time they blink…He loves them as soon as he holds them. He's so sure that he wants to raise them, he wants to be apart of their lives.
When she comes back, Lorelai hands Luke a carrier and a bag with bottles, diapers, and formula.
"I hope you can buy the rest with the job you have. You have this week, I have next week. We'll do this for the rest of their lives. I started an account for their college. Every paycheck one of us gets, we put fifty dollars into this account. Every bonus, we put two hundred. I might come by to visit them, so write down your address." She hands him a notepad and he scribbles down the address, and puts Alex and Eva into their carrier.
He finds a big store with baby items- he buys everything. Even the things that Lorelai put in the bag, he grabs extra of. He's prepared; he's going to do this. No backing out for him. He talks to them, and smiles at them.
It's ten o' clock at night when he comes home. He sets the silver rattle he bought for them on a table in their room. Alex and Eva are bright eyed from napping. But he's also sure that they need to be on a schedule. He puts them in the two cribs that he bought. He doesn't know how he can get them to bed. Then, he sits down in a chair in the corner of his spare room. Then, he takes them in his arms and rocks slowly. This is weird. He doesn't know exactly how to do this, so he clears his throat and tries to sing.
"Uh, rock-um…Rock-ah bye-ey…Pupppy…" They just smile at Luke's anxiety. "Okay, I suck at this. Stop smirking like that. You're already like your mother." He holds them closer to him. "I'm sorry I missed your beginning, I'm going to make it up to you." After a little while, they fall asleep just sitting quietly. He carefully sets them in their cribs, and then he sits back in the chair in the corner. Just to hear them move a little, or hear them breathe.
I wrote a note to tell you how you matter
When the rain came down
All the letters scattered
And washed away
Drifted off to Never
Where you'll be safe from me now forever
In the next eight weeks, Luke and Lorelai grow into a routine. It's comfortable, and they even start making a little conversation.
Can you hear the voice inside you
It calls you back to where you belong
Can you see the one beside you
Who's been standin' there all along
Baby, well you were so cruel
I hated being your fool
So I got a little bit more
Mud on my face
But the years will bring
The bigger scheme of things
And make a pretty memory out of my disgrace
Luke and Lorelai get along way better. Luke's apartment is much bigger now, after two years he got a promotion to head chef. After his promotion, he bought a bigger apartment, and started putting more money in their college apartment. Luke's in Stars Hollow is still running, by Jess.
Rory visits Lorelai about once or twice a month, on report for CNN. Rory, however, lives in Stars Hollow in the Gilmore house, when she isn't busy. Of course, she tries to be in both London and Stars Hollow as much as she can to visit Jess(her very serious boyfriend), and to visit her mom and her siblings.
One week, Lorelai comes to pick up Eva and Alex. They run to her.
"Mooommmyyy." They both come, running into her arms. Eva slips on the ground from her socks, but quickly regains her composure as she runs to Lorelai.
"Geez, you guys grow an inch, even in a week." Lorelai pinches Alex's cheek. "You are going to be ssssooo tall. Two little towers, the both of you." Luke comes walking up from the kitchen and hands Lorelai two lunch boxes, one Hello Kitty, and another Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
"Hey…You want some coffee?" Alex raises his hand.
"I do!" Alex says, excited. Luke shakes his head.
"I don't think so, mister…" Luke says picking Alex up and raising him to the ceiling, then back to the ground. Fatherhood has changed Luke, he's become more sensitive.
"Sure," She says putting Eva in her arms. "Coffee would be great."
"It's going to stunt your growth." Says Eva, looking at her mother who carries her into the kitchen. Lorelai looks at Eva questioningly.
"Just like your father…" Luke laughs when he hears this, then pours her some coffee. The twins scramble to their play room and Luke and Lorelai hear truck sounds.
"Vroom Vroom, indeed." Lorelai says laughing with Luke He sits down at the table with her.
"Have you heard from Rory lately?" Lorelai nods.
"Yeah, she's in New York covering some debate or whatever. Jess decided to come with her, did he tell you?" Luke nods yes.
"Yeah, but I have to say…I would have never left the diner with Ceaser for an entire weekend." Lorelai laughs.
"Yeah, his food sucks. I went in there a year ago, and it's still as busy but…I don't know. I would kill for a great burger." Luke stands up and grabs some beef from the freezer.
"Your wish is my command." Lorelai giggles.
"As long as it's not a disgusting cream cheese santa burger…But yum-my. I haven't had a Luke's burger in…"
"Five years. It was your eighth month." Lorelai becomes silent, Luke flips the burger and puts a piece of cheese on the browning meat. Luke sighs. "Lorelai?" Lorelai looks to Luke, with that blank, innocent face.
"Yeah, Luke?"
"I'm sorry for what I did to you. I shouldn't have screwed you over like that. I just…"
"You freaked out, Luke."
"But us…Now? We're doing really well, Lorelai. And…" Luke sighs. "If we take it slow, maybe we can start something up again…"
"If we do? I don't want to hurt Eva and Alex. I'm not going to lie. I've thought about it, too. But if we just go doing these things- it affects them. Every move we make, Luke- it affects them. I don't want to hurt them." He nods.
"Well, maybe…If we were to get together, maybe we would be serious and firm and together. Maybe we could get the thing we were thinking about. Maybe we can do this, Lorelai." He sighs.
"How do I know what you're going to do? It's been four years, Luke, and I'm still not over what you did, how you left me like that." Luke leans in closer to her, and Lorelai leans back.
"Don't you see, Lorelai? We've been doing this for four years, I've sacrificed everything for my kids. I gave Jess my diner, I moved away from home, and I haven't left Lorelai. I don't plan to, not without Alex and Eva, not without you." Luke takes her hand, her trembling hand. Lorelai looks into his eyes, and takes away her hand.
"I need something more than being 'sure.'"
"I'll see you next Saturday." She says. "Alex! Eva!" She calls out with fake joy. The twins come running up to her with a million toys in their arms. Lorelai walks from the apartment, looking back wistfully at Luke.
On Friday, work gives her a half day. She's relieved, she can spend the day with her kids. She finds a theme park and they both go wild. By the end of the day, all three of them are exhausted.
"Mommy! Mommy! Look what I got at the ring toss!" Eva shows her the teddy bear for a third time. Alex pulls a stuffed snake from his neck.
"Mine is better! SSsssssss…." He says, making sounds like a snake.
"Oh yeah? Roooaaarrroooooorrorrr!" Lorelai laughs.
"Suddenly I'm living with half the rainforest." Lorelai says taking their hands. Eva shakes her head.
"Nuh-uh…Bears live in places like ya-so-meat." Lorelai laughs a little.
"Yosemite?" Lorelai says.
"That's what I said." Eva's voice is soft, and almost wise. When they get to the door, Lorelai opens it, taking about five minutes to find her keys.
But when she walks in…There are picture frames everywhere, all with different pictures. There are only two people depicted in these pictures. Her and Luke. There are rose petals, and candles all around the living room, and sitting on the couch is Luke.
"Go to your play room, guys…" She says softly to Alex and Eva. "Go, go…" She can't believe it, she's still in shock.
"Lorelai…I know you need more… I want to be with you, more than anything. I want to raise our children more together. I want to try it again with you. I want to try us again." Lorelai opens her mouth to say something, but Luke stops her. "I know that you want more, and you don't trust that I'm going to stay, but I will." Lorelai smirks. She feels something, something that she hasn't felt for…five years. She walks closer to Luke, then sits on the couch.
"If we do get together, then… Do you promise you won't leave?" Luke nods and leans in closer. Lorelai smiles and leans in closer, too. "I mean…We can't screw our kids up, that's the worst thing we can do." Her voice is a soft whisper. Their lips are about to come together-
"Mommy! Daddy! Allllleeeexxxxx stole my pony!" Lorelai laughs and takes Eva into her lap, and Alex runs to Luke and sits in his.
"I didn't- I was just borrowing it. She had knots in her tail." Luke looks at Lorelai.
"We have two very funny munchkins." Luke says tickling Alex. Alex and Eva jump from their laps and run back into their play toom.
"So….Can we handle this? Together?" Lorelai says, leaning into Lukes chest.
"Yeah, we can." Lorelai looks up at Luke, she finally trust him. They can finally trust each other. It's all coming together, and it feels great.
But darling, I wish you well
On your way to the wishing well
Swinging off of those gates of hell
But I can tell how hard you're trying
Just have that secret hope
sometimes all we do is cope
Somewhere on the steepest slope
There'll be an endless rope
and nobody crying.
Stepping off the plane, Lorelai thinks about how much her life has changed. She smiles at the grey sky Hartford has, because she knows like her ever-changing life, the sky will change too.
