I couldn't resist This turned out a little more angsty than I had anticipated I hope I don't frighten anyone away! This is ENTIRELY meant to be a ONE parter (although I did upset quite a few people at RE, so maybe I'll write a sequel ).Anyway, here is my first song fic, and the first of my "what if" ideas (though I can't honestly see the other ones materializing )

song by Michal Towber
Perfect

"Ric, I need to talk to you."

I'll make things right
I'll break your fall

Ric looked up from his paperwork. After a long day at the office and being absolutely bombarded with work to take home, he had hoped that he'd be able to get a lot accomplished. But the nervous and hesitant tone to her voice immediately captured his undivided attention.

"What's up?"

Alexis sat down timidly next to him on the couch, against the protests of the suddenly queasy feeling she had in the pit of her stomach. She and Ric had been living together for three months. Every morning she considered telling him as he kissed her goodbye and headed off for work before she. Every day she fought the urge to confess to him as he gazed at her across the dinner table when he thought she was busy focusing on the meal, which he had so carefully prepared for their family, before her. Every night she felt compelled to tell him everything as he kissed her good-night and turned off the light. It ate away at her day after day. It haunted her sleep night after night. She knew that it would tear them apart, but the slits and gashes that the truth would cut would only be deeper the longer she waited.

Unshatter glass
And fix the wall you gave to me

She carefully placed her hands in his as he peered at her through uncertain eyes. His hands were so soft and warm. She stared at them rather than look up into his eyes. She couldn't; she knew that if she did, her words would get lost on their way out.

"You know that I would never want anything to come between us, right?"

Apprehension flashed across Ric's face. No conversation that ever started that way ended well. He moved cautiously closer to her, hoping that she would look up at him; but she didn't.

"Of course. I would never let anything drive me away from you."

Wish me away
And I'll be gone
I didn't mean to block your sun
With my shadow

"It's taken us so long to finally build a trust between us," Alexis began awkwardly. Her eyes shifted slightly and caught sight of her wedding band. Her throat closed up as a dark cloud of guilt fell upon her, and she wanted nothing more than to take it off. She wasn't worthy of it. She wasn't worthy of him. "It's never been easy for me to trust anyone. Growing up as a Cassadine, you know, you learn at an early age that no one is ever selflessly kind to you. And everyone else is just cruel for the hell of it."

Ric gravely dreaded what she was trying to say. He felt his heart rate pick up as his mind raced with fears about the nature of this conversation. "Alexis, I would never be kind to you in order to suit any selfish purposes. Everything that I've done for you is because I care."

"I know," she said quickly, making the carelessly dreadful mistake up looking up into his eyes. She saw pain and confusion in him, and it broke her heart. Her tears didn't stand a fighting chance, and they fell relentlessly. "It's not my trust in you that I'm doubting. It's yours in me."

I'm going where I'm wanted in my dreams
I'm going where I'm wanted in my...

"How could you say that?" Ric whispered, taking a trembling hand to her face. "There is nothing you could ever say or do that would cause me to lose trust in you."

"Don't say that before you hear this," she begged. "You can't possibly understand the magnitude of what you're saying until you know everything."

"Hey – whatever it is, we'll get through it together," he promised unknowingly. "You have to believe that."

Sleep on the floor
Uncovered mattresses and
Cigarette burns in the blanket
That I made for you

Alexis fought desperately to tear her eyes away from his, but his gaze burned into her. She found herself bitterly regretting that she had chosen to speak with him on a whim instead of carefully thinking through her approach. Her sudden impulses had always gotten her into trouble before, and now it could end up costing her everything. She lost the ability to keep her voice even as she prepared her confession. "I just need you to know that I never intended to hurt you in any way."

She spoke so slowly that Ric could feel his heart tearing in two. He couldn't possibly imagine why she thought she had hurt him, but it was obviously devouring and destroying her bit by bit right before his eyes. He was at such a loss for words; it was all he could do to merely sit in silent anguish and wait for her to confide in him.

I wasn't sure just what to say
Guess I got scared and ran away...

Ric's eyes begged her to give voice to whatever was overwhelming her. Her whole body seemed to be overcome with heat all at once, and her breaths were no longer coming to her easily. She knew that the anticipation was harming them both the longer she waited. She just wished that her courtroom eloquence could assist her when she needed it the most.

She could feel him slipping away before the words were even out of her mouth. "Kristina is not only your step-daughter. You and she share the same blood. She's your niece; Sonny is Kristina's real father."

I'm going where I'm wanted in my dreams
I'm going where I'm wanted in my dreams

Ric's eyes glazed over and became frighteningly unfocused. Alexis closed her eyes in shame; when she felt his hand slip away from her face, a new onslaught of tears assaulted her. Ric's mind was drowning in a sea of emotions. The daughter that he had come to love and adore with such a strong passion was his brother's daughter... his brother whom he had hated from such an early age. His brother whom he had cultivated such a fiery hatred towards for years. His brother... the sole cause for his childhood anguish and adulthood spite and heartless inhumanity was the father of the little girl he regarded as his own. He had always known that Alexis had spent one night with his brother. It had always been tough for him to ignore that fact, but he had managed to cope with it over time. And now, whenever he looked at Kristina, he would be reminded of that night. And of Alexis' betrayal.

He was so torn with new and raging emotions that he could only manage four meek words. "You lied to me?"

"I'm sorry," she whispered weakly, desperate for the love and tenderness that rapidly vanished from his eyes to return. "I – I wanted to tell you so much –"

"BULL!" he shouted suddenly, taking them both by surprise. She flinched at his tone, and felt herself shrinking away into nothingness. Ric's rage grew terribly quickly and gained control of his words. "You had so many chances to tell me, but you chose to lie to me for months!" She couldn't tell if the tears that tarnished his face were of anger or sadness. Judging by the way his voice faltered and his body trembled with each word he spoke, she guessed it was a fusion of the two emotions bleeding together. It wasn't anything less than terrifying.

Trying to speak softly and calmly was a mistake. "Ric, you have every right to be upset –"

"UPSET? I'm so angry, I don't think I've ever been so furious!"

I'm sure I've felt this way before
Dear god it hurts so bad sometimes

Ric stood up suddenly, leaving his wife alone with her grief and regret. He ran his hands unsteadily through his hair, feeling his devastation slowly overpowering his initial anger. He pressed his palms into the desk before him and hung his head below his shoulders. It was unspeakably silent for painfully too long. Alexis was afraid to speak for fear that she would only further upset him. Suddenly, the lawyer in him spoke.

"It all makes sense now."

She was confused. She wasn't sure how to approach encouraging him to elaborate. "Wh-what does?"

"You," he said sternly as he turned to greet her agonized face with his piercing eyes. "This is why you wanted to marry me. You just wanted to have a legal leg to stand on in case Sonny ever found out and came after you for custody!"

"No, it's not like that – !"

"You used me to gain power against my brother!" He suddenly felt violently ill, and he turned back away from her. Alexis couldn't imagine how she could possibly make things worse, so she took a chance and slowly stood up. Her knees felt weak. Her legs felt like lead, and her heart felt heavier. She approached him slowly and placed a hand on his shoulder. He jerked away in angry protest at her touch, and she didn't try to reach out to him again.

"Ric... you have to know that I never had any intention to use you – "

"THAT WAS YOUR WHOLE PLAN!"

"I DIDN'T WANT IT TO TEAR US APART!" she sobbed with deafening confession. "I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO HATE ME, BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!"

"YOU DON'T LOVE ME!" he screamed, his face red with anger and his eyes red with devastation. "YOU CAN'T LOVE ME! ALL I AM IS A PAWN TO YOU!"

"Don't say that!" she pleaded, feeling her knees buckle beneath her as she fell to the floor. The sobs that sounded muffled as she pressed them into the palms of her hand rang throughout the room and tore through his heart. But Ric watched her. It didn't even matter that this was the first time she had ever said she loved him.

"You lied. You pretended to care about me, and you just wanted to use me against my brother. I can't believe I fell for it. I can't believe I let myself care about you."

This time I feel it's something more
How could I ever be so blind?

Ric angrily snatched his coat from the back of the desk chair and headed for the doorway. Alexis looked up and quickly scrambled to her feet.

"Wait! Where are you going?" He didn't answer. He couldn't even turn around to look at her. "You can't just walk out on us!"

Ric paused with his hand on the doorknob. He didn't have to see her to know she was still crying for him. For them. He shook his head and hesitantly removed his wedding band, placing it on the table by the door, right in front of the picture of Alexis and Kristina. Without another word spoken, he opened the door and was gone.

Alexis fell back weakly into the couch and buried her face in the cushions until her screams eventually melted into gasping sobs.

I'm going where I'm wanted in my dreams
I'm going where I'm wanted in my dreams
Maybe you'll be there...