Chapter VI: By My Side

This is…kind of strange. Sitting here, on the grass, staring at the crystal clear water of the lake in front of me, watching the way the light, cool breeze makes ripples on the surface. The sun's brilliance shimmers on the top, reflected as a dazzling sprinkle of gold.

The sky's a clear, deep blue. There isn't a cloud in sight.

This is…definitely not what I'm used to, but it's…kind of nice in a way. It's warm, and though it's not the kind of weather I personally prefer, I can't say I mind it. I'm even wearing a white T-shirt, but toned down with dark blue jeans. I don't want to stand out more than I have to…

Japan's a nice place. It's got a lot to recommend it to tourists. Might as well enjoy is while I still can. I'll be leaving in two days, after all.

All around me are people, enjoying the bright, sunny weather. They're mostly further up the grassy bank though, and away from us. We've got a few bodyguards stationed around, just in case any of the many kids notice we're here. That's kind of unlikely, since we're hidden by a rising hill of grass, but I always have believed in being safe rather than sorry.

…Yeah. That's right. I said, 'us' and 'we'. I'm not alone here. Drawing in a deep breath, I turn my face to the left, eyes squinting slightly from the glare of the sun, to look at my companion.

He's lying back against the grass, dressed in a dark blue T-shirt and black jeans, with his arms behind his head and his legs stretched out in a languid manner. His eyes are closed, and he's chewing on a strand of grass. The sun is staring right into his face, but he doesn't seem to mind the direct exposure. Well, that's hardly a surprise. He is Kai, after all.

I guess now I know how he always manages to get such a tan too. Who would've guessed Kai was a regular sun-bather?

…Shut up Tala. What a stupid thing to think. Where's the sun screen anyway?

I smile slightly, and look away from him, back at the tranquil water. I have to admit, I'll kind of miss this place. It's been like a second home to me and my team over the last few months.

But we can't forget our real home, and everyone knows there's no place like home either. Russia is waiting for us. And I have definitely missed Moscow.

I pluck a strand of grass and study it, running a finger over its glossy, smooth surface. Then I glance at Kai. We've been sitting here for a while, and neither of us has said much. Not that the silence is awkward or anything. For once, I feel like it's a companionable one. I'm perfectly happy sitting here in silence. It's like I'm alone, but I have Kai's company.

I really have it, not because he has to be here, but because he wants to be. And that's kind of…well. I'm content, I guess. For once, we're not discussing beyblades, or strategies, we're not arguing or disagreeing over something we really agree on deep down. I'm not really used to it, but I sure could get used to it.

I respect Kai. I always have. It's been hidden over the years, and not all of it was down to me. There have been many other influences, but I now know I should have had the strength and courage to believe and feel what I knew all along.

Kai and I…used to be friends, a long time ago. Now, I finally feel like we really understand one another. Not the way we did as children…that was different.

We haven't really talked since both of us woke up from our comas, but I don't really think words are necessary. He's already surprised me by smiling at me once. And he never smiles, not at me anyway. Sure, he's smirked a lot of times, but a smile is completely different to a smirk. And he's surprised me again today; here I was, happily sitting on my own, contemplating (I'd finally convinced Bryan and Spencer to take a break from their constant fussing over me) and the next thing I knew, someone had sat down beside me. Well, I'd sensed it before I'd seen it: when I'd looked, my eyebrows had risen in surprise.

A good sort of surprise…it was no other than Kai who had sat himself next to me. He had nodded a greeting, plucked a grass end from the ground, put it in his mouth, and then laid himself back, staring at the sky quietly. After looking at him for a few moments, I'd finally figured out the nature of his coming; not to talk or to tell me anything, just to sit. So I'd looked away and gone back to my thoughts.

And here we are now, twenty-minutes or so on, and we still haven't said a word to each other. He might have even fallen asleep, though I doubt that.

…No harm in checking though is there.

Reaching out with my left hand, I wave my palm across his face. His eyebrows twitch; obviously, he's sensed a change in light. Then, his brilliant amethyst eyes open, and look firstly at my hand, before shifting to me, silently questioning what I want. In the sunlight, his eyes look luminescent, and acquire an amber tinge.

I smirk at him. 'Thought you dozed off.'

He closes his eyes again in response. 'Hn.' Is all he replies.

For some reason, his reaction amuses me. How did I know he was going to do exactly that?

I look away, and wonder where Tyson and his other friends are. It's kind of strange that he's here and not with them.

I look up at the bright blue sky and the cool breeze blows the two stray strands of my hair into my eyes. I close them briefly, thinking about how much has happened to me and my team in the last few months, and how much has changed.

How much we've all changed, and how much I've learned. From other team members, from Spencer and Bryan, from officials…

And how much I've learned from you and about you, Kai.

I suddenly sense something else, and open my eyes again, glancing down to my left, to find that Kai has his eyes open again, and is watching me, a thoughtful look on his face as he chews on the grass end. Like me, he still has a couple of plasters over his forehead and on his cheeks, but otherwise, we've both healed quite well, and fast.

I raise an eyebrow at him and he averts his gaze back to the sky.

Okay then…what was that about? I decide to shrug it off, and look away. But then Kai finally breaks the silence.

'What time's the flight?'

I shred the strand of grass in my hand, and watch as I release it and the breeze sends it towards the lake.

'3.15pm.' I reply.

'Direct?'

'Direct.' I nod. 'We'll arrive at Moscow late night to early morning.'

Kai blinks, and then in one swift and fluid motion, he sits up, resting his palms back against the grass. Then he removes the grass end with his left hand and tosses it aside, and stares at the water in front of us.

I feel like I ought to say something, but I'm not exactly sure what, or how. I'm not good at any of this stuff, especially not when it comes to Kai.

I clear my throat slightly and decide to take the plunge. I may not have another chance to; I doubt I could get rid of Bryan and Spencer long enough again, and it's even more unlikely that Kai can shake off his bladebreaker pals either.

May as well just say what's on my mind…

I open my mouth to speak, but the second I do, Kai does the same and our voices talk over each other.

'Uh…Kai…'

'Look Tala…'

I clamp my mouth shut, and glance at him. He looks back, mouth slightly open, but then he closes it, and nods at me, signalling that I can go first.

Suddenly, I can't seem to remember what I wanted to say. What's in my mind is that day I met him at the docks in Russia and welcomed him back into my team, and then when he was lying still, in a coma.

'Uh…' I begin, uncharacteristic in my hesitancy. 'I just…well…I. A lot has happened and…' I stop and glare at the water in frustration. Why is it that Tyson can blab on about feelings and friendship so easily, and I find it so difficult to even say a word like 'thank you'?

Hmph…I know the answer. Tyson wasn't brought up in some dark and dingy abbey where a smile was rewarded with punishment.

Kai waits. I half hope he'll interrupt and go first, so I don't have to continue…or try to, anyway.

'What I want to say…' I begin again. 'Is that…you…that we…well I…I think I understand now.'

I can feel his eyes burning into me. At length, he repeats:

'You…understand?'

'Yes.' I nod. 'I think so.'

Another silence. And then:

'Understand what?'

I grit my teeth. Maybe I should just drop this…but…but I…we've been through so much. We can't leave it like this, surely.

Without returning his gaze, I reply flatly: 'You.'

From the corner of my vision I can see he's looked away. Now he's staring at the lake again, and for a few moments, neither of us says anything. This time the silence is awkward, and I curse myself for having opened my usually small mouth.

Nice going Tala…now he thinks you've gone all mushy, when it's not like that at all…

I consider telling him to forget I said that, but then he finally speaks.

'I don't.'

I blink, and look at him. Confusion fills my mind. He doesn't what? Understand me?

Something like disappointment fills me and again I look away. I thought maybe now was the right time to make amends, and to settle our differences once and for all. But maybe I was wrong. Maybe…Kai has once again managed to walk right over me.

There's no point in replying. What can I say to something like that? If he doesn't want to…get along again, I can't make him.

But that doesn't make sense. Why is he here now then? Is he just here out of guilt? If so, I don't need him here in self-pity. That's not the Kai I remember from years ago.

Why does Kai always have the ability to utterly confuse me in my every thoughts and judgements of him?

I bet he finds it 'fun', whatever his criterion of 'fun' is.

'I don't understand why I did it.' He says suddenly.

I glance back at him. He's looking down at the grass in front of his crossed legs now.

'Huh?' I ask, feeling completely clueless. He blinks, glances at me, and then looks at the water again.

'It shouldn't have happened.' He says quietly.

'…What?' I ask. 'What are you talking about?'

Silence. And then:

'Everything.'

'…' I frown at him. Is he…wait. Is he saying that he's made a mistake? Is he admitting that he's done something wrong? The great Kai Hiwatari…is saying that out loud? Well, someone get a baseball bat and knock me over the head…I must be dreaming.

I manage to remain composed. I know how hard it must be for him to say things like this.

'It wasn't worth the price-tag.' Kai's voice trails off and a few minutes of silence pass again.

I decide to break it. He's being so serious, which I guess is normal for him, but this is a different kind of serious, and I'm not sure I like it. In an attempt to lighten the mood, I say:

'Come on, Kai. You're so rich you don't even have to look at price-tags. You can afford everything.'

Something passes over Kai's face, and I realise I've said the wrong thing. For one awful moment I think he's going to get up and leave, but he doesn't. The look vanishes, and his eyes lower.

'Not everything.' He replies, and it seems to me to be through his teeth. Have I offended him? I shouldn't try to joke with him…he's not used to it, and neither am I. I don't know what the hell the matter with me is.

Excuse any instances of blasphemous use of the expression 'hell'.

'I'm sorry about Dranzer.' I say at last.

His eyes close briefly. 'Hn'. He says, and it sounds bitter and resentful.

I suppose I'm not half as sorry as he is. I can't imagine how it must feel to lose your bit-beast. It must be really awful. When I had found out that Wolborg had survived the match against Garland, I had been so happy. But to lose your bit-beast and know that you are the cause of it…

What kind of guilt must Kai be feeling now…?

His head is bowed now, and I frown. Doesn't he realise…that he lost Dranzer for a good cause? He put right all the wrongs he had set in motion…he had paid for it already. Why was he beating himself up over it even more?

'Kai.' I say. 'If you hadn't done it, nothing would have changed. You must know that.'

He doesn't move or respond. It's not exactly like me to offer words of comfort or support. I'm not exactly sure what to say. But the fact that I somehow know Kai has kept this hidden from his other team-mates and is now showing it to me makes me feel obligated to say something.

'It isn't just Dranzer.' He says quietly.

Oh. Now hold on. I think now I really do understand.

'You can stop right there.' In instruct, taking on the tone of voice I used so often to him during the world championships. 'Because if you think I'm holding some kind of grudge, you're dead wrong. Excuse the awful pun too.'

He does look up then, right at me.

'Tala…' He begins. 'I…'

I hold up a hand, signalling for him to stop. 'You don't have to say anything Kai. Like I said, I understand now. Everything. Everyone makes mistakes. It's…only human, or that's what they all say anyway. Look at me. I worked for Boris Balkov once upon a time. If you think what you did was stupid, well, it's not half as insane as what might have been had I somehow defeated Tyson in Russia two years back.'

He blinks at me, his look intent. 'Bryan and Spencer…' He begins, but again, I interrupt him.

'Understand too. Some good has come out of this, Kai. You wouldn't be here and neither would I, if it hadn't happened. And you can bet your best Rolex watch on that, so stop with the guilt act, because frankly, it doesn't suit your bad-boy image. Trust me on that one.' I say curtly.

Now there's another surprise…Kai looks stunned by my words. I give him a look.

'…What?' I question. 'It's true…' I glance down at his left wrist. 'Unless…you don't have a Rolex watch…'

He looks at me incredulously. Then he looks away, and for a while, doesn't say anything. I hope I haven't offended him again...it's just talking to Kai feels much easier now after everything that's happened.

Then I notice the corners of his lips are turning upwards. Is he smiling? I look away, feeling the corners of my own lips tugging.

'You're right.' He says at last.

'Of course, I always am.'

Kai snorts. 'Whatever.'

I glance at him. 'Are you suggesting otherwise?'

'…Of course not.' Kai replies, and rolls his eyes.

I shake my head, and add seriously: 'She'll come back Kai. My Arabian mythology isn't all that great, but I know Phoenixes don't die. And I can see no reason why she wouldn't return to you.'

Kai looks at me and for the first time in ages, I'm able to read his expression. It seems my words are the right ones, because his shoulders seem more relaxed and he looks more at ease. I roll my eyes at him.

'That is, if you exclude the fact you have serious commitment issues; you think you're the complete and utter best thing that ever graced this planet, and have the ability to drive everyone and everything utterly insane…then I can't think of anything.'

'…Everyone…like…you?' Kai smirks.

'I said everyone. Did I say I was included?' I shoot back.

'No…but everyone is…'

'Me excluded.'

'I see…' The smirk still plays on Kai's lips and I snort.

'Takes more to drive me insane than some stupid team-ditching Kai…'

'Right.' The voice is full of amusement that is not restrained.

'Believe what you like.' I say.

'I will.'

'…Shut up Kai.'

'…I'm not saying anything…'

'You just said I'm not saying anything so that's saying something.'

'You're not saying anything?'

'No…you're not saying anything…you said.'

'So why tell me to shut up?'

'…' I frown at him. He raises an eyebrow. I roll my eyes at him again. 'Whatever.'

In response, he digs his right hand into his jeans pocket. He takes something out, and it's wrapped in blue velvet.

He holds it out to me. I look at it, and then at him. If I was surprised before, I'm completely gob-smacked now…well…not that you'd be able to tell.

'What is this Kai?'

'Something that'd be happier with you.'

I take it from him, and slowly unwrap it. What I see is such a shock; my mouth does fall open then.

It's a brand new Wolborg beyblade. Completely reconstructed, upgraded, and improved in everyway over the last one I had. Though my bit-chip had survived, my beyblade had been damaged beyond repair. I blink, unable to stop myself from gawking at it. I run my thumb over the glossy, shiny surface, and then reach into my left pocket, and take out the Wolborg bit-chip. I clip it into place and it flashes once, looking completely at home.

Kai had done this…for me? I look at him, stunned.

'You…did this?'

'Tyson selected the engine gear. Ray selected the running core. Max chose the specialised defence ring…and I chose the attack ring. Kenny ran tests and constructed it, keeping in mind you favour endurance as a strategy.' Kai replies.

They all did this…for me…? But why? I'm not used to receiving gifts and this feels very awkward, especially since it comes directly from Kai.

'Uh…Kai…this is…it's a lot…you really…all of you…not that I don't appreciate it but it's really…'

I break off, realising that I probably sound like a complete and utter babbling idiot.

'…Thank you.' I say simply.

Kai gives me a nod.

Really, I'm so pleased with this new blade I just want to launch it straight away. But I guess I'll have to wait until I can get myself a new launcher back at home.

I carefully wrap the beyblade in the soft material, making a mental note that I'll have to thank the others later. I have just over a day to do it in.

Then a thought occurs to me, and I look back at Kai, who is looking at the water again. I blurt out what's on my mind.

'Kai. Why don't you come with us?'

Kai looks at me. 'What?'

'To Russia.' I explain.

He frowns, as if the thought has never occurred to him before. '…I can't.' He says at last.

'Why not?' I frown.

'My home is here Tala.' He replies. 'Maybe…one day…in the future…I will be able to think of Russia as home. But for now…' His voice trails off, and I understand. He's used to Japan, the way I am used to Russia. Still, it would be good to see him sometime before next year's championships.

'I understand.' I nod. 'But that doesn't give you an excuse not to show up in the next year at least once. You know where to find us now.'

Kai blinks, and looks at me again. A small smile forms on his lips as he slyly says:

'In the Abbey. Where else…?'

I raise an eyebrow at him, and slowly smile back, determined to get the last word.

'Hilarious, Kai. Congratulations. After seventeen years, you've finally cracked your first joke.'

He narrows his eyes at me, and I laugh. I'll never say it out loud, but I sure am going to miss having Kai Hiwatari around.

Author's Note:

Well, there you have it! Reflections is done and finished. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. Thank you for all the reviews you've given me up to this point, your encouragement is great and inspires me to write more. I'll be finishing off Infiltration too, and then I'll be working on a full fic, at last. Please leave your thoughts on this, and can I thank you all again for reading this story.