I see your face in my dreams, so vivid, so real and so clear. Yet when I wake your face is still there. Your presence lingers around me, consuming my sanity in all its wondrous light. And even when I'm alone in the dark I see your eyes upon me, shining eternally and ever bright. Though how can it be that I still feel you beside me, when it's been so long since I last heard your voice, harmonious as a song and filling my soul.

I wonder in the deepest hours of the night, as the snow falls gently to the hardened earth, about the moments that blew across my blinded sight and leaving me to wallow in the misery of my ill attempted hope. I lay here praying for the strength to get through the dark and ask for the answer to the question burning in my heart. And even so, with all these quarrels in my head I find the time to daydream in my bed, about what once was, what is and what could come to be.

I find myself so flustered by these emotions that I swear I can feel the rushing of the winds sweeping through my empty soul, trying to pick up the last leaf of hope and fly it off into the darkest hole of eternal life. And I ask myself why, I beg my self to please break free of the bonds that hold me to your twisted will and to let go of the locks that shut out your bitter, tortured heart.

And some how behind the wall of tears I see clearly the road before me, showing me the path that was once behind me and the valley of unknowing that calls me softly. I fear the way this life is leading me, to a galaxy of ongoing and uncertain destinations. And yet again I hear the gentle waves of your voice, crashing upon me relentless and demanding. The randomness scaring me, the non-promised frightening and just beyond that a flicker of curiosity drives me.

But how do I know it's not the games in my head, being played over and over, again and again. How do I know it's really my destination, my fate, to be entranced by your subtle stares and your gently creeping hands among my skin? I wait quietly for the answers, the snow still falling like a blanket of silvery light, and nothing comes. Neither a voice this time nor the hushed whisper of assurance humming in my ear, only sounds of the deepest hours of the night in the deafening silence, that is all that surrounds me.