The Muffinless

It ‘twas another peaceful and jolly day at Professor Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. The birds were singing joyously in there perches aloft in the trees whose branches blew lazily in the wind. Inside the academy the gifted children awoke, stretching there arms sleepily in the air, and after realizing it was indeed a Saturday morning they promptly fell back to sleep. But there was in fact someone who, for reasons unbeknownst to all, sat alone in the kitchen sighing sadly to himself. Why was this mutant-this person, rather-so gloomy one may inquire? The simple answer was in fact that he was muffinless.

Yes, that is right kiddies. He was without the delightfully warm and delicious presence of muffins. After searching endlessly in the cabinets, on the counters, and underneath the sink he realized the muffins that had sat so delicately on the table the day before were missing. And his suspicions as to who had snatched away such wonderfully fresh goodies were aimed solely on one person. Logan.

Now before we describe why he thought Wolverine had eaten the baked goods, or why the muffins were so terribly important (one can always simply skip to the local market and buy new ones, no?) you must understand who this downcast man was. His name was Kurt Wagner, The Incredible Nightcrawler was his name at the Munich Circus, and he had an unhealthy passion for blueberry muffins. Mr. Wagner was a fuzzy blue mutant (with fangs, pointed ears, yellow eyes, a tail, blue curly hair, 6 fingers, and 4 toes I might add) who because of his blue color craved blue things-why? We shall never know. But he loved all things blue: from his baby blue blankie, to the navy blue couch that resided in the games room. And the moment he had looked upon a blueberry muffin only the day before, he had fallen in love. It was blue, and he wanted one!

So, now that we know who this muffinless man is, we must understand why he blamed Logan for such an evil deed. The answer was simple enough: Kurt had overheard him telling Storm yesterday that the muffins looked scrumptious. That in itself was queer enough. Logan never was that polite, nor did he ever use the word "scrumptious."