|Terror of Valentine
Author: Evil-Mecha-Pilot PM
:Hiatus: Cupid comes of Konoha and causes havoc throughout the village.Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,768 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 06-13-05 - Published: 01-20-05 - id: 2227248
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Title: Terror of Valentine
Summary: Cupid comes to Konoha and causes havoc throughout the village.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto!
A/N: Sorry to my readers...if they're still around. But you readers should be picking up the pattern by now. Who shall be cupid's next victim? Some people may become scared because I'm hungry for a little yaoi!
Warning:Slight OOCness and possible bad grammar!
Neji tugged at the hitae-ate holding his dark mane of hair back. Nothing appeared to be out of place. How indecent would it look with stray hairs standing out in every direction if he should talk with Tenten. As a girl, appearances had to be important to her, right?
Neji longed for a normal day. The past few days had been filled with very eventful surprises.
First, there was Shikamaru taking a sudden interest in his cousin and following her around the village like a lost puppy. The supposed genius was even camping outside her window. Last night had been Neji's turn to chase the boy off.
Another very odd event was that the almighty Uchiha, who resisted all females within the village, was love struck and stalking Anko. To add to that, people were hearing Sasuke saying very inappropriate, vulgar even, comments. The only one who seemed to be defending him at this point was Sakura.
On top of all that, there was Hinata's strange new fascination with the puppet-user, Kankuro. She didn't even seem to falter when her father scolded her about gallivanting around Konoha and upsetting the Hyuuga Clan's pubic image. Hinata just sat there staring into space, blushing every time Kankuro's name was mentioned.
"Worse than when she liked Naruto." Neji grunted in annoyance. His cousin's taste in guys was definitely questionable.
Glancing into the mirror again and making one last quick sweep over his image, Neji took his leave. He felt he attained perfection.
With Valentine's Day and festival drawing near, Neji grew curious and wished to attend the gathering. But there he was stuck, because he didn't want to show up alone. So instead of looking anti-social, as many people said he was, Neji would ask a teammate to go along with him.
Cupid was sitting at the Hyuuga manor gate.
His day so far was not full of pain. During the night Cupid had escaped the confines of Konohamaru's room by slipping out the window. Next he ran for the park, stealing another bed sheet on the way and found a reasonable spot to sleep between the roots of a tree.
It was the best time he had since arriving in Konoha.
Now that he was in a much better mood, he could get his job done. To do it Cupid had gone back to his old strategy of getting his targets when they were alone.
"Master plan!" Cupid praised himself while he punched the air.
Cupid ducked into the bushes and grinned wickedly. "I am a genius."
Neji blinked at the sight of Tenten standing in his yard. "What are you doing here?"
"Would, 'I enjoy your company', be a good enough answer?" Tenten shrugged as she answered.
Erasing the look of surprise from his face, Neji reverted back to his old self. He walked past Tenten and headed for the training grounds.
Tenten looked irritability at Neji's back. "Yes Neji, I'd love to walk with you."
"No one asked you to."
Cupid stared hopelessly at the two. "This couple seriously needs my help."
Plucking a leaf from the bush he was currently sitting in, Cupid held it close to his face. With a grin, Cupid blew the green little leaf and released it into the passing breeze. The plan may have failed for Sasuke and Sakura, but that shouldn't have ruled it out completely.
Besides, the crazy lady couldn't possibly appear here. From what Cupid heard, she'd retreated to some tower in the center of a dangerous area to save what sanity she did have.
With the small green piece of foliage dancing in the wind, it soon hovered over Neji's head. Falling slowly, the leaf was about to touch down. Less than an inch remained between the little leaf and the top of Neji's head.
The wind picked up and pulled the leaf into the air again.
"Stupid wind." Cupid stayed at a safe distance away to ensure no injury came to him. But he climbed the tree higher to see what was happening.
Lowering again, the leaf neared Neji's head…
…and the wind picked it up again.
"There is no way that's possible!"
After the same thing happened five more time, Cupid was getting tired and was prepared to throw a rock at Neji head instead of waiting for the leaf to settle.
As the leaf lowered again, Cupid slumped against the tree trunk and sighed and waited for the wind to ruin his plan again.
A loud belch broke in!
Neji turned in the direction of the gaseous sound and fisted his hands at the gross behavior. His eye twitching and he focused his sight on the source of the noise.
"Chouji, that was so rude!" Tenten shuddered while voicing her opinion. "And what are you doing here?"
"Shikamaru snuck back on the Hyuuga property to see Hinata again. His mom sent me to give him some breakfast." Chouji held up a very nicely wrapped bento box. In his other hand there was an open bag on snacks and crumbles littered the area around his mouth.
Tenten's hands went to her hips. "Doesn't matter how noble your cause is, burping is just plain disgusting. Right, Neji?" Something caught her eye. "There's a leaf in your hair." She brushed said leaf away. "No need to thank me."
Neji said nothing. Not even an insult.
Neji's white eyes were glazed over with passion and it was directed at Chouji. Taking a step forward, Neji's hand rose close to the other boy's face.
Chouji jumped back alarmed by the action. "Alright! I'll ask to come here next time."
Both Chouji and Tenten's eyes bulged tremendously as Neji's thumb brushed away the crumbles on Chouji's face.
Neji's hand moved to caressed Chouji's cheek. "Can't have this face messy if you're going to accompany me to the festival this Saturday."
Wanting to lay on his back and throw a silent tantrum, Cupid whimpered when he realized just how high he had actually climbed in the tree. Konoha was known for having some very high trees and Cupid had unwittingly perched himself on the tippy top of one of those high ones.
"AAAH!" Chouji backed away frantically using the back of his hand to wipe his cheek like Neji's touch left like a glob of slime. "Don't come near me you white-eyed freak!"
Neji smiled in a strange manner. "Why are you running away? Can't you see its destiny that has brought us together?"
"No! It's bad luck!" Chouji looked around for a way of escape as Neji stepped closer to him.
"Neji if you're going to act like this, then I'm leaving!" Tenten enviously growled and turned, stomping off.
"I said stay away from me!" Using all his might, Chouji chucked Shikamaru's bento at Neji's head. Easily sidestepping the flying object, Neji continued on his track for Chouji. But as the bento passed by Neji, there was a loud thud as it smashed into the back on Tenten's head and she collapsed to the ground unconscious, a large bump starting to grow.
"SHIKAMARU!" Chouji cried out for help running further into the Hyuuga property much to Neji's delight.
Neji knew the land's layout like the back of his hand so there was no place for Chouji to hide. But this would give Neji a chance to play a little of game of hide-and-seek.
Cupid: That's it! I give up!
E-M-P: You can't do that!
Cupid: And why not? -glares at E-M-P-
Cupid: I bet your going to say, "We learn from our mistakes so we will know what to do next time around."
Cupid: -grins- You're right! I can't give up now -run back into fic-
E-M-P: I was going to say because of funny stuff. But that'll work!
A/N: Who can say they feel sorry for Chouji? MWAHAHAHA! This was so much fun to write! Another thing is this is my first publicly shown yaoi moment! Fear me!
'09 Author's Notes: Some things have been added and others taken away. Reading the chapter over, I wondered what the heck spawned this idea. I think I was aiming to really creep the readers out. Sky's the limit with fanfiction!
Cursed Blessing, you are an editing goddess!