|And They Lived Happily Ever After
Author: Maiden of the Moon PM
Prisoners, towers, witches, really long hair, and a lot of shampoo... all relatively normal occurrences. But seriously, what sort of fairytale begins with ‘And they lived happily ever after? This one. The story of Rapunzel will never be the same again.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 22,026 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 12-22-06 - Published: 02-05-05 - Status: Complete - id: 2249953
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Ha! Don't make me laugh! (Whoops, too late. . .) Author's
Note: Quite honestly, I'm afraid of the reviews I'll be getting
for this one. . . (sweat drop) Heehee. Anyway, this is. . .
Well, really just spontaneous stupidity. I'm not writing an outline
for it, meaning its length is a mystery to me as well as you, and any
detail-y questions will probably result in long, blank stares. But
that's OKAY! Because you've all heard the story of Rapunzel
before and pretty much know what's gonna happen anyway! XD
Author's Note: Quite honestly, I'm afraid of the reviews I'll be getting for this one. . . (sweat drop)
Heehee. Anyway, this is. . . Well, really just spontaneous stupidity. I'm not writing an outline for it, meaning its length is a mystery to me as well as you, and any detail-y questions will probably result in long, blank stares. But that's OKAY! Because you've all heard the story of Rapunzel before and pretty much know what's gonna happen anyway! XD
So, on that note, let's begin- before I conk out over the keyboard from fatigue. (Yes, it's late. . .uggggh. . .) XD
And they lived happily ever after.
. . . Well, they did. What do you mean, that spoils the story? You already knew they would, didn't you? Didn't the title and the summary sort of give that "little secret" away? It's not like you were expecting them to be dramatically killed, were you? Because if you were, sorry to say, this isn't the story you want to be reading. Instead, kindly click the back button and immerse yourself in your futile plans for world domination. Or eat a cookie. Your choice.
Anyway, despite the fact that you know they live happily ever after, you probably want to know what happens before that, don't you?
Oh fine. . .
He had always considered his mother to be insanely stupid. Not just stupid, INSANELY stupid. The kind that you'd want to call child support on, simply because she was obviously inadequate to be dealing in any sort of parental activities. And he didn't say this without good reason. He had his reasons- oh, he HAD his reasons. . .
One, she had named him Chrono. Which, come on- what sort of a name was that? A stupid one, that was what. Seriously, what on earth was in her system when that concoction of letters had crossed her mind? All the other kids at school had NORMAL names like Bill and Ted and Bob- but OOOOOOH NO. No Bob for him! He was CHRONO- the one who would need massive physiatrist therapy before he was thirty to try and correct all of the problems that had resulted from this celebrity-like name without the money or the fame. What else could be said about it? It was sort of like "chrome" with a "no". No chrome. Chrono.
. . . Or not. He had long since given up trying to find any rhyme or reason behind it.
Then there was also this thing his mum had with greenery, which, in Chrono's eyes, tottered dangerously on the line of obsessive ness. Every day she'd sit at her bedroom window and just STARE into their neighbor's garden- which in and of itself was rude and strange enough- but then she had to start stealing food from that witch's garden and. . . Well. . . That just lead to the worst thing she'd done. (Yes, she had done something even worse to him then naming him Chrono, if that was believable.)
She had SOLD him. She had promised him away before he was even born just to nab a bit of leaf! He half wished that leaf HAD been some sort of illegal drug (which was what sounded implied), because at least then he'd have known he'd had some worth to her. But no. . . all HIS weight amounted to in gold in her eyes was a couple of shillings for parsley. Or whatever the hell she had dug out of the neighbor's garden.
Yes, his mother had been a bit screwy in the head. Maybe she was suffering still from her own whacked out parents, who had seen it fit to name her Pandemonia. But that still gave her no excuse to screw up HIS life, in his professional opinion.
Still, no matter how bad the above was, his real pet peeve was her ignorance. Hadn't it might have occurred to her that maybe- JUUUUUST MAYBE- he'd have appreciated some sort of warning or prelude to the whole selling-his-soul-for-spinach thing? He hadn't greatly enjoyed the experience of suddenly being plucked off the sidewalk on his way to school, knocked out, and dumped into a rickety old car- just to be whisked away to some doorless tower. To make it worse, it had been show and tell day! He wanted to display his button collection. . .
But speaking of that doorless tower- now that he thought of it- how in Hades' name had they gotten up it the first time, if there was no door? Did the witch have unusually powerful legs for jumping fifty-some feet straight up into the air, grab the only window ledge- and pull herself in with a teen boy slung over her shoulder? Doubtful. Veeeeeeery doubtful. So he was sure that there was a door somewhere- he just wasn't sure where. It wasn't for lack of trying to discover its location- he'd looked in every nook and cranny, underneath every rug, and behind every painting in the little apartment multiple times- there just simply wasn't anything of interest to be found. Unless you were fond of dust bunnies. No, the only way he'd ever find that door, he feared, was if his witch "friend" told him- but seeing as how she'd gone through all the trouble of capturing him in the first place, that was as likely to happen as a. . . a. . . not. . . very. . .likely. . . thing.
". . ." Chrono frowned, slouching over the windowsill as he cushioned his chin with his arms. 'I need a thesaurus.'
Sighing listlessly, the young teen raked a small hand through his violet bangs, ruby colored eyes blankly watching the ice-cream cloud float through the bright blue heavens. 'Maybe it's just as well that Satella won't let me go,' he reasoned flatly. 'It's not like I have anywhere to run to. I've been missing from school for so long, they wouldn't even recognize me. And mother. . .
Let's not start talking about mother again.'
He- and his thoughts- fell silent; simply observing his increasingly boring world.
The sun shone in the sky above him. The grass and trees and daffodils swayed in the breeze below him. A bird flew smack into the brick tower and died instantly just to the left of him. In fact. . .
'About 78 degrees above my sill, if I imagine a large circle with an area of pi-r-squared encasing my windo-'
He paused, blinking as the mathematical musing crossed his mind. Now he was starting to scare himself.
And so, with nothing better to do- but not yet ready to resort to doing complex geometric equations for 'fun'- Chrono began singing the only song he knew- "The Song that Never Ends".
next chapter we meet Rosette! And Satella! . . . I think. As I said,
this one isn't pre-planed, so I'd be very grateful for any ideas
you guys would like to throw in! XD Well, hope you enjoyed!
Please RR! Jaaaaaa!
Well, hope you enjoyed! Please RR! Jaaaaaa!