Author: kaser PM
InuiKaidou. Shounen-ai. Kaidou has a strange dream about Inui and things are awkward between them.Rated: Fiction T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,734 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Updated: 03-28-05 - Published: 02-25-05 - id: 2280897
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Ii Yume – Hyaku Paacento
Kaidou wasn't quite sure what to do. He had confessed his feelings to Inui and his senpai had reciprocated, but they were still standing there in awkward silence. Kaidou also wasn't sure if Inui was all right, or how to make him so if he wasn't. Did Inui cry often when he was home alone? Or was this a recent development? He decided to wait and see what the boy did, but as the minutes dragged on Inui remained frozen. Kaidou was uncertain, he could still feel the dampness from his senpai's tears, and his shirt was still rumpled from their embrace…maybe if he was closer… Kaidou took a few nervous steps towards Inui and put a hand on his shoulder.
"S-Sadaharu-san…" Inui finally looked at him.
"Na, Kaidou, daijoubu." He halfheartedly tried to shrug Kaidou's hand off. Even if he said he was fine, the silent tears still streaming down his face told Kaidou otherwise. This wasn't something he was accustomed to.
"Uso da yo!" Anger was Kaidou's natural defense and Inui smiled slightly at the more common ground. Not really thinking, but feeling less awkward, Inui reached out and straightened Kaidou's shirt. He put a hand on Kaidou's shoulder, ready to change the topic and dismiss the awkwardness, only to find it damp. He looked at the damp spot as if it were offensive or out of place.
"I'll get you a dry shirt," he said, moving to get one from the dresser by his bed. He got one out and then he seemed to return to a state of shock and sat on the bed. Kaidou waited a moment for Inui to hand him the shirt but the older boy was once again motionless. Kaidou removed his damp shirt without hesitation and took the clean shirt from his senpai, slipping it on and sitting on the bed beside Inui. They sat in silence for a few more minutes.
"To what, senpai?" Kaidou had noted Inui was no longer calling him Kaoru and decided perhaps he should stop calling him Sadaharu.
"To your…confession." Kaidou's eyes widened considerably. He doesn't remember? No, he probably just wasn't sure Kaidou had heard, and this was his strange way of asking. Still, it unnerved the younger boy.
"H-hai." There was a significant pause here.
"What did I say?" He didn't remember. He was surprised and upset and he had said something he didn't remember saying. And from the worried tone of voice he had used when asking, he most likely didn't mean what he said. Kaidou almost choked on the air he was breathing. He was going to be rejected by the only person who had seen past his terrifying exterior. He stood abruptly.
"Gomen, I have to go." He left quickly, not giving Inui a chance to say anything. He had his tennis bag with him as he had expected to do some sort of training with Inui, and he decided a few practice swings in the river would help ease his frustration.
Kaidou never was good at relieving his frustration. The riverside had always been his training grounds, but it was Inui who had first told him to wade into the water, it was the towel Inui had given him that he was whipping out of the cool river, and it was Inui's scent that wafted from Inui's shirt every time Kaidou moved. He was getting more frustrated with every swing. After a while of catching hints of Inui's scent Kaidou stopped. He pulled the shirt over his nose and inhaled deeply. It only frustrated him more and he quickly pulled it over his head and tossed it back toward his bag. He felt tears welling up in his eyes as he did this, but his pride wouldn't allow them to fall, and in fact they never did.
The next week was awkward at best. Kaidou tried to avoid Inui, managing to find an excuse or simply leave any time the older boy found him alone. He was certain Inui wouldn't say anything in front of the other Seigaku members. But then, Inui had told him more than once there were no certainties in data. They had just finished a rigorous practice on a warm Friday afternoon. Kaidou had pulled off his tennis shirt and was reaching for his school uniform when Inui's firm hands pushed him against the wall.
"Inui-senpai!" Kaidou tried to break free, but Inui was always stronger.
"Kaoru-kun, ai shiteru!" Kaidou, and everyone else, stared at him in wide-eyed shock. Kaidou tried once more to release himself from Inui's grasp. This time he met with no opposition, though he wasn't going far. He rested his head on one of Inui's broad shoulders and wrapped his arms around his waist. Inui in turn wrapped his arms around Kaidou's smaller frame.
"Na, Kaoru, was that a satisfactory response?"
"Hai, ii da yo, Sadaharu-san." They stood like that for a while, enjoying each other's warmth, before Inui released Kaidou and the younger boy finished changing, a furious blush on his face.
"Ikimashou ka, Kaoru?"
Going to Inui's house this time was very different from any other time Kaidou had been. The first thing Inui did was firmly grasp Kaidou's hand, and chuckle lightly at the faint blush it caused. When they got there Inui asked him if he wanted to stay the night. Kaidou wasn't sure this was a good idea, sure they'd done it before, but things were a little different after confessing your love, weren't they? Still, Kaidou had fallen asleep every night hugging Inui's shirt, and the thought that he might be able to fall asleep hugging Inui instead was very convincing. They still did their homework in companionable silence, but this time their bodies always maintained some light contact, and occasionally when Inui was deep in thought he would reach over and lightly touch Kaidou's cheek or hair. When they discussed tennis Inui asked Kaidou if he would become his permanent doubles partner, which Kaidou agreed to, and they both mentioned how beautiful the other looked on the courts. Inui cooked something delicious for dinner, and made no attempts to force Inui Juice on Kaidou. When Kaidou mentioned this in surprise Inui simply smiled.
"I don't have any new juice today…But you know, if there are ever any ill effects I'll take care of you." Kaidou thought of all the times the drink had caused him to collapse on the court and wondered vaguely if that meant Inui would catch him next time. After dinner Inui put on a movie and slipped his arm around Kaidou's waist and Kaidou rested his head on Inui's shoulder. Then they curled up together on Inui's bed to sleep. 'Yume desu ne?' Kaidou thought as Inui's warm embrace lulled him to slumber. Then he smiled a little to himself, moving closer to Inui. 'Ii yume.'
Daijoubu – "I'm fine"
Uso da yo – "That's a lie!"
Hai – "Yes"
Gomen – "Sorry"
Ai shiteru – "I love you"
Ii da yo – "It was good"
Ikimashou ka – "Shall we go?"
Ikimashou – "Let's go"
Yume desu ne – "This is a dream, isn't it?"
Ii yume – "Good dream"
A note about "I love you"
I know three ways in Japanese to say 'I love you' that is "Name ga daisuki" "Name ga suki" and "Ai shiteru". My friend who has taken more Japanese than me tells me that "Name ga daisuki" is the weakest way to express this sentiment, while "Ai shiteru" is the strongest. Thus in chapter one Kaidou says "Sadaharu-san ga daisuki" being less comfortable with his feelings, whereas in this chapter Inui says "Ai shiteru" as I imagine he would have come to terms with it quite some time ago.
I read someone ranting once about how using scattered Japanese in fanfics was dumb…I understood the sentiment but can't abide by it. If I could write the whole thing in Japanese I would, but I've only had 2 years of Japanese in my life. I'd leave it out entirely but I was having difficulty keeping their voices in my head, even with their image songs playing over and over in the background, and this helped. Also scattered Japanese tends to enter my thoughts and speech anyway so sumimasen (sorry) but it's gonna stay.
Author's Note: Ah I'm such a liar! I made a promise to myself and my readers that I would never post an unfinished fanfic, and here I am uploading a chapter two over a month after posting chapter one. However, I have an excuse, that is, I had meant for there to only be one chapter, and then I later decided I wanted to add on with some stuff I didn't end up getting into it the first time (like the two falling asleep together). And I might break it further still, depending on my mood, because part of me wants to write just what Inui would do to Kaidou on a 'date'. But this ends quite nicely on it's own, so I'm still not leaving readers in agony.
This chapter completely wrote itself, I swear. I sat down with a vague concept in mind, picked a starting point, and never actually got to the vague concept – in fact I completely eliminated it, I can't even put it in another chapter if the mood strikes me. I'm surprised to find that Kaidou doesn't say "fushu" once in the entire chapter, gomen ne; it just didn't fall in anywhere properly. These two are deceptively fun to write about.
Again, comments are well liked and very appreciated, constructive criticism is acceptable, and flames are unnecessary and downright rude.