|Happy Ed Birthday
Author: Mr. BC PM
Everyone in the culdesac has celebrated his or her birthday. Here is what happened in each kid's party. Please R&RRated: Fiction K+ - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,286 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 08-24-05 - Published: 02-27-05 - id: 2283895
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
"Okay, What did you all buy me today!" Eddy shouted as he burst out of his house.
Kevin was walking by and was startled by Eddy's sudden appearance. "What on Earth are you taking about, dork?"
"Come on. You know whose birthday is today, right?" He flashed him a million dollar smile.
"Actually, all three of those people do celebrate their birthday today. It was in the paper today. You should read the paper more often, loser." Kevin then took off on his bike back home, leaving Eddy to sulk on his lawn.
"You know, Eddy," Edd said as he walked up. "I'm pretty sure he and the others are still pretty bitter about you turning their birthday parties into catastrophes. I know I still am."
"So what? You and Ed going to help me turn my party into the biggest and most celebrated party in the history of the cul-de-sac!"
With that, Eddy ran back into his house to get party necessities.
Ed came running down the street, having just eaten breakfast at a nearby diner.
"What's going on in your head, Double D?"
"Eddy's throwing himself a birthday party. Can you believe it?"
"Yes, I certainly can, Double D."
About an hour later, Eddy's living room was turned into a party atmosphere. He was snickering uncontrollably and could not wait to find out what everyone would give him as presents.
"Hey, Lumpy!" Eddy called out of his house. "Go gather everyone and bring them here!"
"Can do, Birthday Boy," Ed replied as he rounded up everyone in the cul-de-sac.
"Eddy, don't you think the other kids aren't interested in attending your party?" Edd asked, going inside Eddy's house..
"Where there's a will, there's a way, Double D," he replied. "And you will be part of the will."
"I can't fathom you will do anymore of your preposterous scheming on me to get what you want. Is that your plan, Eddy?"
But he wasn't paying attention. He was already upstairs getting confetti to throw all over the floor.
Not too long after, Ed came back with everyone but Kevin in his arms. Everyone was bewildered.
"Ed! You put me down, now!" Sarah berated.
"Absolutely, baby sister," he responded. Promptly, he dropped everyone onto floor with a thud.
"Plank says, 'Watch what you're doing,'" Jonny complained as he got up.
"Ed, what's going on here?" Nazz asked.
"Rolf is not feeling too good about this, Ed boy," Rolf added.
Ed left the living room to go into the kitchen. After about a minute of waiting, the loudspeakers Eddy installed started playing Chicago's 25 or 6 to 4 and the Eds danced their way in, albeit horribly.
"What is this? Some sort of dance lesson scam?" Jimmy hesitated to ask.
"No way, curly boy," Eddy replied. "It's my birthday party that I have been so kind to invite you all to."
"Yeah, right. Like we'll have fun at this," Sarah said haughtily.
"Hey, this is my birthday, and none of you are going to ruin it for me!" Eddy chastised.
"I bet you've never had a bad birthday before like you've tried to give them."
"Hey! Not too long ago, I had an absolutely terrible birthday! It was five days after probably the worst day in the history of this continent! I couldn't celebrate my birthday because my parents had friends who died in the attacks! I had to attend memorial services left and right, even on my birthday! How do you think I felt about that?"
"Is that why you've been trying to give everyone birthday blues, Eddy?" Edd asked.
Ignoring his friend, Eddy brought out another of his handmade cake creations for everyone
"I don't want that!" everyone shouted in unison.
I won't tell you what was in it because you'd probably lose your lunch over it.
"Now, what did you buy me for presents?" Eddy asked with another million-dollar smile.
Everyone gave him a blank look.
"Oh, come on. You had to have at least bought me jawbreakers. I asked for them!"
"Eddy, maybe they couldn't afford them," Edd said.
"Stay out of this, Sockhead." Before he could do or say anything else, the doorbell rang.
"Oh boy! More birthday surprises!" he said excitedly and ran to open the door.
It was Kevin. He stood with a smirk and his arms crossed. "Hey, man. I thought I'd give you a little birthday present."
"Well, where is it! Did you get me any jawbreakers from your dad's factory?"
"Nope. Your present is right here. HEY GUYS! COME ON OVER!" Right on cue, four linebackers for the county high school approached Eddy and got into snap formation.
Before they blitzed, Kevin added: "I just don't have the strength to give you birthday beatings, so these guys will do it for me."
Eddy was so frightened that he ran over to his room and left everyone alone. The linebackers went away.
"So what do we do now," asked Jimmy.
"Let's listen to music and go out to eat somewhere," Kevin suggested.
"Good idea," Double D replied.
So everyone popped in their favorite CD to the loudspeakers and afterwards had a sandwich at a nearby sub shop.
Eddy came out of his room and felt relieved that the linebackers went away, but was livid that everyone had gone away. "What is so bad about my birthday!" he seethed to himself. He went outside and called out: "HEY! ALL OF YOU COME BACK TO MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW AND FINISH THE PARTY!"
Upon hearing this, the kids ignored him and went back to their sandwiches.
Eddy went over to the shop and ordered everyone back to the party.
"Hey, we're all finished with the party," Kevin replied. "Right now, we're enjoying ourselves in having lunch, dork."
"Fine! I'll take myself out to dinner and I'll celebrate my party with my parents if it means that much to you!" With that, he stormed out of the sandwich shop red in the face and got dressed to go out to dinner.
The other kids, including Ed and Edd wondered if now Eddy hada better appreciation of what others' birthdays felt like as a result of someone else's foolishness.