It's a conspiracy

By: Bomb-O-Maniac

Beta: Angel Weasel-Woman

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto - I own Washitaka and company.

They're out to get me.

I swear it.

It's grating down on my nerves rather quickly. Why can't they just leave me alone?

That's all I want. Peace, and some quiet, too. Scratch that.

Make it a lot of quiet.

A HELL of a lot of quiet at that.

Damn it.

I don't want to grade paaaapeerrrrsss…

A twenty-five-year-old dark brown haired man groaned and leaned back in his chair. He stared at the ceiling. 'We really should get a fan installed in here…' he thought idly before righting himself and staring down at stacks of un-graded papers. Large stacks of papers. HUMUNGUS stacks of papers. Stacks of papers SO LARGE that they made Tsunade-sama's boobies really, really small in comparison.

The teacher sighed and stretched his arms in the air. He twisted his neck and was rewarded with a few loud pops. The pressure released and Iruka felt a bit better than before. Leaning back once more in his chair, he shut his eyes and yawned. A nap sounded good about now. It wouldn't hurt to catch a little zzz's….

"Zzzzz…"

Genma stopped walking and looked around. What the hell? He looked around. Where was that noise coming from? It sounded like something… someone… was enjoying the peaceful after school hours to the maximum. He chewed his everlasting toothpick thoughtfully. Who could it be?

"Zzzzz…"

Hmm… It was most likely some poor overworked newbie. Heh heh heh…. That or it was Kurenai-sensei enjoying her day off. Maybe even Kotetsu. Or, dare he think it, the greatest chuunin in Konoha, Iruka-sensei? 'Now there's a laugh' he thought 'Iruka wouldn't be caught (dead) sleeping at school…'

He rounded the corner and stopped (dead). His jaw dropped and the toothpick he'd been chewing for the past so many years nearly fell out.

'Or not'

Lo and behold there was Iruka. Leaning back precariously on his chair, feet on desk, mouth open, and teensy bit of drool running down the side of his face.

"Zzzzz…"

'It should be illegal for people to be that cute when they sleep' the jounin teacher thought.

Smirking to himself, he wished he had a camera oh, so very badly. Black mail was always a good thing to have… Then he thought about it. Iruka had never wronged the man in any way. In fact, he helped him out a lot with paperwork and missed classes. An all around nice guy and way to damn polite - BUT STILL!

"Zzzzz…"

Genma raised an eyebrow as he watched some more. 'He's gunna fall if he keeps sleeping like that' he thought inwardly. He was a bit worried also. The jounin didn't really want his coworker to fall over. But then, he the chuunin sensei WAS a shinobi; he should be able to keep his balance in his sleep.

"IRUKA-SENSEI!" Anyone and everyone (who wasn't deaf) could hear the overly energetic voice of the overly energetic flying ball of orange named Naruto (apart from Iruka who's deep in sleep). He sighed and figured that he'd probably like to be awake when the kyuubi decided to pounce on him. So Genma, being the oh so very talented (and kind) guy that he is, walked quietly over to Iruka-sensei and tapped him on the shoulder -

WHAM!

And found himself flying through the door, through the wall, and fifty feat away from the building.

Who knew?

"Oooooooooooooooooowee god damn it." he moaned, sat up woozily, and put a hand to his head.

"Woo…a bit dizzy there." Genma muttered to himself, swaying all the while. He then felt hands on his back steadying him.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry! Are you al right Genma-sensei?" It was Iruka's voice that - however distorted it may be - said something. He looked up.

"Oi, Iruka, when'd did you become a quintuplet?" Iruka sweat-dropped. He didn't throw the other teacher that hard did he?

"Erm, I didn't - you're just seeing things, Genma…"

"No, I swear," he reached out and tried to touch one of the imaginary chuunin-sensei's, "They're as real as my head ache!"

"…I'm sure…"

"They are!"

(Iruka really big sweat-drop.)

"Riiight, let's get you back inside now… Come on, up you go…" Iruka put an arm around Genma's torso and slung one of the other teacher's arms around his neck and hung on to it. He stood up, a bit off kilter from the extra weight that was Genma - but otherwise fine.

"I can do it." Genma complained. Iruka nodded. Talking to jounin was like talking to little kids.

("Iruka-sensei! Where are you!" Speaking of little kids - ignoring, ignoring, ignoring….)

"I'm sure you can - would you like me to let go so you can test that?" He asked and moved fore ward while the other was contemplating his question. The 'other' thought about. Did he really want to try walking on his own while he was still seeing multiple Iruka-sensei's and the while the world seemed to be on an everlasting merry-go-round?

"… yes."

"Too bad."

"Damn teacher…" His mutter was not unlike a sulky preteen's.

"Iruka-sensei! There you are! What happened?" Naruto asked loudly.

"Oh nothing…"

"Are you sure?" Naruto stared at him in a manner that suggested he didn't believe Iruka one bit.

"Quite positive Naruto."

"Doesn't look like 'nothing'." Drawled a new voice. "What happened, sensei?"

"Hello Kakashi-sensei." Iruka deadpanned.

"Ah! Kakashi! I have some advice to give you - or all three of you - eh, did your mother know you were a triplet?"

"Erm…"

"No, no that's not what I wanted to say… Now listen closely, Kakashi…" Kakashi seemed to not be paying any attention at all - in fact, he was reading his famous porno -cough- I mean romance book. "KAKASHI!"

"What!"

"Pay attention!"

"But I am!"

"ARGH! Gimme that!" Genma snatched the 'romance' book away from the other jounin and held it hostage. He's HEALED! WOOT! Wouldn't ya know it? XDD

"Hey!"

"Now will you pay attention?"

Kakashi pouted - even if you really can't see it underneath his mask. But we all know that it's there right? Right. Of course you do.

"Alright now, head my words you idiot," Genma poked him in the chest. "Never, under any circumstances, disturb a sleeping chuunin from his sleep. You're liable to get yourself thrown through a wall or two." He poked him in the chest again twice. Kakashi raised an eyebrow and looked at the now empty place that had been filled with Iruka. He and

Naruto must have taken off when they weren't looking.

"He threw you?" the copy nin asked curiously.

"Didn't mean it - I guess I just surprised him." Genma shrugged his shoulders and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Damn, now I can't remember what I was doing before I tried to wake him up…oh yea! Black mail! But I didn't have a camera, damn it, I never have a camera when I need it."

"Do you even own a camera?"

"Yes!"

"It's a disposable one isn't it?"

"Well, duh!"

---

Not to far from the hidden village we all know and love (Konoha you dolts) a tall man with a long, shaggy, salt and pepper colored mane sat on a tree branch with his back against the tree trunk. The man's eyes were shut and his chest rose and fell in the rhythm of one deep in sleep.

Or so we're all led to believe that is.

"Snore…"

All right, so maybe he really is asleep…

ANYWAYS!

This man was known as Washitaka and he was a shinobi of the leaf. The metal on his hitai-ate glinted in the sunlight as he shifted in his sleep. 'What is with this new shinobi?' you might be wondering. Well, the truth is, he's a bit weird - but no weirder than the rest of 'em! I think…He left the leaf two years after the nine tails attacked and was sealed away inside Naruto and right after his team entered the chuunin exams and passed. He still thought of his only gennin team every once in a while and wondered how they were doing. Were those insufferable brats even still alive?

Not far off into the distance a peregrine falcon screamed, waking the slumbering Washitaka from his sleep.

CRASH!

"Snore…"

Or maybe not.

---

Authors Notes: YEA! Me first Naruto fic XDD So if it sucked - oh well!

Bomb: -looks around-

Murray: What the hell are you doing?

Bomb: looking for reviewers...

Murray: There are none.

Bomb: WHAT! WHY?

Furry: Because your story sucked...

Washitaka: There's no way in hell that could have sucked - I WAS IN IT! WAHAHAAA!

Iruka: Shut up old fart...

Washitaka: YOU BRAT!

REVIEW! OR FACE MY WRATH! MWAHAHAHAAA!

-Bomb-O-Maniac-