Hate and Other Four Letter Words

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Amelda let out a tired sigh as he stripped off his leather trench.

Dartz had sent him on yet another soul collecting expedition, much to his annoyance. He had originally planned to stake out Seto Kaiba and reek his vengeance – but no, the ‘Great Beast must be awakened.’ But to do that, Dartz needed souls – and since he was the only one in the lair, Amelda was the one who had to do the days dirty work.

Amelda threw the jacket into the open laundry basket and proceeded to remove his tank top. Yeah, it was old and it was worn but he’d had it for years and it was one of the only things that remained of his past. He loved that thing like a friend – in fact, it was probably the only friend he had.

Or at least believed he had.

Amelda frowned as he noticed the array of towels and discarded underwear littering the floor.

Obviously, Varon had been using his bathroom again.

All he had wanted today was a little revenge, but since he couldn’t have that, he was willing make do with a shower. But, like usual, the other members of Doma were lining up to screw over his day.

Sighing with dissatisfaction, he began to throw the rumpled garments one by one into the basket.

“I wonder where Varon is,” he said softly, the animosity towards his partner fading slightly as he tossed in two mismatched socks.

Probably out chasing Mai.

“I don’t know what he sees in her – she’s loud, bossy and dresses like a whore.”

Not to mention she treats him like shit.

And it was true.

After saving her from losing a duel against Joey Wheeler, Mai had stormed off without so much as a thank you. Instead, she accused Varon of stealing her victory before disappearing to lick her wounds.

Varon had said he didn’t really care so long as the Valentine woman was safe, but Amelda had been – and still was – pissed to hell and back with her attitude. Varon had been left with a broken arm, and although he denied it, Amelda was in no doubt that he was also suffering a broken heart.

Amelda scowled.

He really did hate that woman with a passion.

And it wasn’t just because she had once borrowed his favourite tank top either.

---

Amelda adjusted the shower and let the water run so that it would warm up. He never understood why Raphael took so many cold showers – and so often, too, but he didn’t have the patience or the inclination to wait for a tub to fill and then lounge in it like Dartz. Then again, Dartz bathed in something that resembled an Olympic swimming pool in size and it wasn’t as if he had anything better to do.

While he waited for the temperature to rise, he went in search of a clean towel. Finding that Varon had used all his, he was forced to ‘borrow’ one of Dartz’s. Not that he was complaining. After all, the Atlantean had a preference for giant, white, fluffy towels.

None of them ever asked.

Well, not anymore anyway.

After removing both his trousers and his underpants in one fluid motion, Amelda stepped into the shower and closed his eyes, tilting his head upwards so that the liquid washed over his face. He remained still for a moment, letting the hot jets stream over his body. Feeling his burning muscles relax, Amelda reached for his shampoo.

At that moment, a bleary-eyed Varon stumbled into the bathroom, knocking over the mountain of clothes that had found their way into the wicker basket by the door.

Amelda’s first instinct was to rant at his chocolate haired colleague for using up all his shampoo – and conditioner, but then indignation surfaced.

“Varon! What the hell are you doing in here?” he demanded, jumping out of the shower. “I getting really tired of this! First, you leave all your dirty clothes and use my towels – then you use my shampoo – and conditioner – and now you walk in when I’m trying to take a shower! Are you some kind of pervert of what?”

Varon, finding it extremely difficult to focus on Amelda’s arms without feeling queasy since they were flying every which way, suddenly giggled.

Fuck! Varon was pissed.

“If I’m a pervert…” he said laughing. “It’s because you’re a naturist!”

Confusion winning over his annoyance, Amelda followed Varon’s gloved point and suddenly remembered that he was in the middle of a warm shower and very naked.

Grabbing the first item of clothing he could see, Amelda hurtled himself into a pair of underpants.

By now, Varon was rolling around on the floor clutching his stomach as if his sides would split from all his laughing.

“Those are mine, mate.”

Amelda blanched. Not only was he tired from a day of soul hunting, and not only had he been denied his chance for revenge, he was soaking wet from his unfinished shower, and not only had been caught naked, he was now wearing a set of Varon’s underpants while he was laughing at him.

And they had already been worn.

Feeling the heat in his body rising with each passing second, but unsure of whether it was from embarrassment or anger, Amelda chose to follow the course of the latter and do the only thing he could do – retaliate.

And he knew just the subject…

“Varon – why are you here? I thought you were looking for Mai,” he said the name scornfully.

Varon’s demeanour changed immediately.

“I was…” he began shakily. “But she told me to leave her alone.” Eyes lowered, and Varon’s shoulders sagged.

Amelda had the sudden feeling that he was out of his depth. Sure, he teased Varon about Mai a lot, but that was when he was sober. He had no idea how he would take to this when he was pissed out of his head.

Varon’s body began to tremble.

“She told me that she didn’t need me, never has, never would, and never wanted to see me again.”

“Varon,” began Amelda, but he didn’t have a clue what to do. Varon was on his knees on the floor with his head held in his hands. His shoulders began to shake, and Amelda was very worried about the younger boy.

“She hates me, doesn’t she mate?”

“Varon…” Amelda walked towards him and placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Hahahaha…” Amelda flinched. Varon was laughing manically and it was quite frightening. “She hates me! Isn’t it funny, mate?”

Amelda didn’t say anything. He was too shocked by Varon’s behaviour and sudden change in temperament.

And he thought that drugs had fucked him up!

“I mean, I really, really like Mai, but she’ll never love me,” hysteria was swiftly replaced by deadly seriousness. “And do you know why?”

“Why, Varon?” asked Amelda tentatively, mentally noting never to offer to buy him a drink.

“Because she’s in love with Joey Wheeler.”

A moment of reflection left Amelda to realise just how vulnerable Varon actually was. He always put up a front, and pretended that Mai’s rejection didn’t really bother him. Amelda knew that he was just kidding himself, but he never knew that he was so – so – Amelda couldn’t put a name on it, but there was something about seeing Varon this way that made Amelda’s heart fill with compassion.

Varon suddenly began trembling violently and hot tears began to glide down his face.

“She loves Wheeler…”

“I don’t know what you see in her anyway,” whispered Amelda bitterly.

He hated Mai, but he suddenly realised that it wasn’t because of her rude personality, bad clothes or selfishness. It was because of what she was doing to Varon.

Varon’s sobs echoed throughout the tiled room, and Amelda felt him shiver.

“You’re freezing!” he announced thankful for something that he could do.

Leaving him for less than a second, Amelda reached out and snatched up the towel that had been taken from Dartz. Draping the towel over his body, Amelda helped Varon to his feet and led him into his bedroom where he sat him on the edge of the bed while he stood in front of him.

Varon’s body continued to shake with the intensity of his tears. Catching his chin in his right hand, Amelda tipped Varon’s face towards his.

“She doesn’t love me,” he sobbed his eyes remaining on the floor.

“But do you love her?” Amelda asked before he even knew what he was saying.

Varon whispered something he couldn’t quite hear.

Amelda knelt down in front of Varon drawing his eyes level. Brushing the dark bangs from his eyes, his heart stung when he saw the redness of them.

“Do you love her?”

After a moment of silence.

“No…”

“Then why do you care if she loves Wheeler?”

“Because I don’t want to be alone…”

Deep blue eyes were glazed with tears and fighting against sense, Amelda followed his instinct and wrapped his arms around the younger man.

“Varon – you’re not alone,” he told him, a hand stroking through the mass of messy hair.

“I’ve always been alone.” He spoke between sobs. “I thought that with Mai it would be different – she’s just like me, alone. I thought that if she loved me, we could have eachother. We could be alone – together.”

“But you just said you didn’t love her.”

Varon nodded. “I told you, we’re just the same. She’s in love with someone she’ll never have – and so am I…”

Amelda held Varon closer to him, so that his cheek was pressed against his chest. His words caught in his throat, but he managed to croak out his question.

“Who?”

He feared he already knew the answer.

“It doesn’t matter. They don’t love me – they hate me…you – you all hate me…”

Amelda’s mind began to throb and his heart raced.

Surely he couldn’t be talking about –

“Everyone hates me!”

Varon suddenly pushed himself from Amelda and ran straight back into the bathroom covering his mouth.

Amelda knew what was coming next. Closing his eyes he tried to ignore the sounds of violent retching that came from the direction that Varon had disappeared.

The towel lay in Amelda’s arms, wet with Varon’s tears. Amelda held it to his body as though it was Varon and whispered softly to himself.

“I don’t hate you…”

But he refused to think about how he really felt about the other biker boy, because in all honesty, he was shit scared.

Varon was nothing like Mai really. He was more like Amelda. They were both absolutely terrified of being alone, and had both developed rather unsavoury obsessions to take their minds off it – Varon and Mai, Amelda and Kaiba.

In reality, Amelda and Varon were already alone together.

“Urgh!” Varon could still be heard from within the bathroom and Amelda started to wonder about how much he had actually drank.

His guess was he drank enough to numb the pain, and then to pass the time.

“Varon? Are you alright?” he asked as he walked in to check on his colleague.

---

Varon was no longer crouched over the toilet bowl like Amelda predicted he would be. He was in actual fact sat in the corner of the shower stall, the cold tap on full blast. His body was still, and although his eyes were open, they were completely devoid of light.

Amelda gasped.

“Are you crazy?”

Racing towards his fallen comrade, Amelda flung himself into the freezing river and tried to pull Varon out, but the shorter man wouldn’t budge. Struggling to lift him to his feet, Amelda bent down and tried to hoist him up by grabbing him by the shoulders, but due to the uncooperativeness of Varon, he was the one pulled down.

Amelda landed between Varon’s legs, and in one last desperate attempt to help him, begged.

“Please Varon.”

Varon suddenly seemed to snap awake, a small amount of light entering his eyes.

“What’s going on, mate?” he questioned, his eyes blinking in a confused manner, although he still remained in a dazed state and couldn’t hear anything much beside the pounding of blood echoing in his head.

Amelda helped Varon back into the bedroom, although it was a wonder they managed it without falling.

“Do you want to get changed?” he asked, referring to his drenched armour.

Varon nodded slowly, lifted his hands to his shoulders, and then stopped.

“Mate? Can I have a hand?”

Varon’s hands were frozen like ice and he could barely twitch his fingers.

Amelda tried to calculate how long Varon had been in the shower as he approached him. Cautiously, he began to undo the series of straps that held his shoulder plates in place and let them drop to the floor. Next, he tackled the large plates of armour that protected his torso, and was surprised to find that Varon wore nothing underneath.

Taking a step back, it was all Amelda could do not to stare at his comrade. He had only ever seen him in full gear, never stripped to the waist in moonlight. He was breathtaking.

“What?”

Amelda was startled out of his trance suddenly.

“Can you manage those by yourself?” he asked, nodding to his pants.

Varon attempted to undo the fastenings, but his hands were still too cold. He shook his head.

“I’m pathetic aren’t I?”

“Don’t be stupid,” scolded Amelda as he proceeded to unzip his pants for him. Amelda stopped halfway and covered him with the towel. He gave him a gentle smile of reassurance.

Varon suddenly noticed that Amelda was shivering, and that cold water was dripping from his magenta locks. Picking up the towel, Varon wrapped both him and Amelda up in it.

“Varon?”

“Shush, mate. You’re like bloody ice!” said Varon.

Varon wrapped his arms around Amelda’s narrow waist, pulling the two into a tight embrace. His dark hair tickled against Amelda’s chest, but he was too stunned to notice.

The two stood in silence for a moment, but after a while, Amelda felt short, sharp blasts of cold air against his skin. Varon was crying again. Amelda brought his arms to Varon’s shoulders as he took a seat on the edge and pulled him into his lap.

“What’s wrong Varon?” he asked. Dealing with Varon when he was intoxicated was a good deal harder than he ever would have expected. It was a lot worse then when he was stoned. It was like having to console a small child. Then again, in a way, all Doma members were children. They had all experienced something that had taken away their families and made them grow up fast and learn to count on no one but themselves.

But the difference between him and Raphael and Varon was that while they had been part of loving families, Varon had never had anyone. He didn’t know what it felt like to have people who cared for him.

He didn’t know how it felt to be loved.

“I don’t hate you,” said Amelda softly and impulsively.

Varon, who was like a baby in his arms, looked up suddenly. He had been expecting to see anything but the sincerity that he found in Amelda’s grey eyes.

“What did you say?” he asked incredulously, not believing what he was hearing.

Amelda tipped his head down so that their noses were almost touching. Seeing both the fear and the hope in Varon’s eyes, he knew his earlier thoughts had been confirmed.

“I don’t hate you, Varon…”

Amelda pressed his lips to Varon’s in a gentle kiss, and then withdrew. “But do you hate me?” he questioned as he cupped Varon’s face in his hand.

“No…”

Amelda’s hand slid around the back of his neck, and his fingers tangled in the thick fudge locks.

“Amelda?” Varon’s voice trembled as Amelda pulled him into another, deeper kiss.

Amelda stopped. “What?”

Varon looked like Joey Wheeler caught in front of a Blue Eyes for a moment, and then a smirk formed on his soft lips. “If we’re gonna do this, I wanna be on top.”

Amelda laughed, although his heart was pounding for fear he’d read the signs wrong. “Not if I get there first…” he said, dropping the towel.

Varon shifted in his lap and stole a kiss from the amused man. His tongue glided into Amelda’s mouth and caressed its counterpart. Amelda was taken aback for a moment and let Varon take a tender kiss from him. Sensing that Amelda was willing to let him have control – at least for the time being – Varon intensified the kiss. His tongue dived in and out of their joined mouths, and his lips pushed against Amelda’s, making them swell and bruise.

Removing his hands from Amelda’s waist, Varon slid them up the smooth expanse of skin on his chest, the rough material of his gloves burning against the pale flesh making Amelda moan. His brought them to his shoulders and pushed him back onto the bed, not once breaking the kiss. Amelda felt Varon slither up his legs until he was settled just below his groin, their erections brushing against eachother.

Not liking where he was positioned, Amelda decided that it was time he took over. Gently, Amelda sucked on Varon’s tongue, making the younger boy gasp at the strange, yet erotic sensation. Amelda felt Varon pause to revel in his newfound pleasure. Never one to pass up an advantage, Amelda proceeded to flip Varon onto his back.

Varon cried out in shock, and then resentment at being tricked and having his power taken away, but was soon pacified when Amelda began to place hot kisses along his collarbone, making him sigh in contentment. As Amelda’s lips continued their journey along his neck and jaw, his fingers swept downwards until they reached the half-fastened pants.

“I thought,” he said between kisses, “I told you to take these off.”

Varon lifted his hips, allowing Amelda to pull them from his body and dropped them off the side of the bed. Amelda stopped to admire Varon in all his naked glory, and realised all too late that it was unwise to leave an aroused Varon unattended.

Varon had wriggled lower on the bed so that he was lying under Amelda’s chest. Varon snaked his tongue out of his mouth and flicked them over Amelda’s nipples in firm strokes, making him moan and shiver. Amelda’s arms, which were the only things supporting him, began to tremble as Varon’s teasing tongue traced over his stomach, all the while Varon was making his way to his goal.

“Ahh! Varon! Fuck!” cried Amelda as Varon began to suck his burning desire through the cotton boxers that he was wearing. The combination of Varon’s tongue massaging against the throbbing organ and the feel of wet material against the sensitive skin was sending Amelda close to the edge. The tongue brushed over the moist tip and Amelda’s fists clawed at the sheets on the bed.

Just when he thought he couldn’t take it any longer, Varon stopped, making him growl in disappointment.

“I think I’ll be wanting these back now,” his hands tugging on the hem of the pants.

Amelda sat back on his heels and cocked his head to one side.

“Well then why don’t you take them?” he challenged.

Varon gave a feral smile and pounced. Twisting the two bodies together, he pinned Amelda to the bed by his wrists. He began to trail feather light kisses over his smooth chest, that tongue paying particular attention to his hardening nipples. Amelda gave cry of frustration. Varon was driving him crazy, damn it!

Freeing himself from Varon’s grip, Amelda twisted his hands into Varon’s hair and he attempted to push the other man lower, directing his playful mouth and tongue to where he wanted it most.

Varon’s tongue trailed from Amelda’s naval to the line of the borrowed undergarments. Capturing the hem in his teeth, Varon – with excruciating slowness – started to remove the pants. Fighting against the urge to explode, Amelda bit his lip so hard it began to bleed, and Varon having finished his task, was only too happy to kiss it better. Climbing back up over the muscled body belonging to Amelda, Varon seductively trailed his fingers along Amelda’s thighs, stopping short of where he most wanted to touch.

Tasting the sharp flavour of Amelda sent a tremor up Varon’s spine, and he breathed into the passionate kiss. Amelda felt like he was drowning in his euphoric haze, his fingers still entangled in thick strands of chocolate. Pulling Varon back down towards him, he revealed something he never thought he’d ever tell anyone – let alone himself.

“I never hated you, you know. Not even when you thought I was a girl.”

Varon’s face was hard – impossible to read, and Amelda feared that he may have overstepped the mark – said too much, and now he was unable to take it back.

“I never hated you either – not even when I found out you’re a bloke,” he admitted.

The honesty of Amelda’s words, the look in his eyes, and not to mention the alcohol in his system, fuelled Varon’s next confession.

“I – I really, really like you, mate. Even more than Mai…” he said dreamily, placing a soft kiss on Amelda’s lips.

He didn’t hear Amelda’s reply because he fell asleep in his arms.

“That’s good, Varon.”

There was a pause.

“Because I think I love you…”

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How was that? I know, I guess they were a bit OOC but you have to remember that Varon is drunk, and Amelda is finally ‘following his instincts.’ The problem is will Varon still feel the same way in the morning when he has sobered up? What will happen between him and Amelda?

I was gonna make this into a series of one-shots, but if you want me to continue with this story – tell me! I won’t know if you don’t review!