"Melissa!" "Balthezars's" startled mother's voice came from
behind them. "What are you doing with that crazy loon? If you even
hurt her…"
Jareth stood up to face her, laying charm thickly throughout his
words. "Surely you do not mean to say I was threatening to hurt your
daughter in anyway. Why Madame, I was simply asking her a
directional question, which she answered politely." The angry mother
stared at him, slack jawed. As she tried to force out the words, Jareth
walked away.
Melissa, as she had been called, yelled after him, "You can find
any tape at the Best Buy store!"
Jareth whirled about to inform her that he couldn't read Earthly
letters, but seeing the angry mothers scowl decided against it. So on he
went, dodging through the groups of people that haunted this peculiar
place. It wasn't long before he came to the end of one of the halls: he
could go either left or right. Straight led outside, onto a huge spread of
parked cars, but there was a force field blocking it. Right led into a
large store, the biggest Jareth had seen yet, and the doorway was lit
with three-foot tall glowing letter.
"Right is right," he muttered to himself, a phrase commonly used
by the Goblins to find their ways around his castle. He walked into the
large store, hoping against hope that it nwas best buy. He paused briefly
to overhear some conversation.
"Why'd you buy that?" One teenager asked.
"Well don't you just love a bargain? Best buy rules…" Another
teen, clutching a plastic bag answered.
Jareth grinned to himself, "So this is Best Buy." He didn't notice
the female cashier glancing sidelong at him. He walked up to her. Her
name was Amanda, he noticed from the nametag she wore. "Miss,
where is the Video section?"
Amanda looked at him, smiling at him a little too brightly,"
Videos are that way, Mr. .um…um…" she stalled deliberately for a
name.
"Jareth."
"Jareth. There right over here," she took him and led him by the
elbow, of which he didn't object to, since Best Buy was clearly as hard
to navigate as the main section of this horrid place. "You know, you
look really …um…foreign. Are you from around here?" She asked, her
voice lilting and bright.
"I'm from the Lab…um…a scientific lab, that is." Jareth said,
hoping this chick wasn't as bright as she didn't look.
Amanda looked at him very sadly. "You were
artificially…um…intimidated then?" She asked with the sincerest
apathy.
Jareth repressed a snicker. "Yes, something like that." They had
reached a section full of small boxes. The blond-headed cashier showed
him the videos with a wave of her hands.
"Is there anything spec ific your looking for?" She changed the
real hard words into easier words she knew. Now Jareth grimaced.
There had to be thousands of tapes here. He could never find the one
Sarah wanted. In the name of Gainel, the dream king, how was he going
to pull this one off? Amanda sensed his confusion. "Um…Can I help
you find what you're looking for?"
"Yes…I'm looking for one…well, what's your favorite?" He
asked her, praying she and Sarah might have something in common,
like their taste in VCR tapes.
"Hee hee. They don't sell it here." Amanda said quietly. Jareth
caught her meaning by the look in her eyes. "What's your favorite, she
asked in a husky voice.
The goblin king's eyes went wide. Favorite…favorite. "The
Labyrinth." He answered quickly. He held his breath.
Amanda nodded. You remind me of the baybe." She over-
pronounced the last word, stepping closer to him, tracing a finger down
his chest.
"The babe with the power," he murmured down to her. It
unnerved him that Sarah's experience (or Toby's actually, Sarah had
never heard that song) in the Labyrinth would be such public
knowledge. "Could you find it for me?" his voice was more musical
now; he had found his item.
Amanda smiled at him and walked over to the Ls (though Jareth
couldn't tell this). She pulled out a brown video with a picture on the
cover. Jareth looked closer at it, and found a picture of…him!
"Oh, 'Manda!" He cried softly, using all his Labyrinthine charm.
She couldn't see the picture on the cover, or else…well, he didn't know
what else. Also, he had no money, an item he'd found was very
important in the mortal realms. "What an angel. You've been such help.
How can I thank you?"
"I know a way." Amanda whispered in his ear. Jareth was utterly
disgusted. Being as old as he was, with your pick of nymphs and Fairies
and the like, humans just weren't that attractive any more. The only
one he'd ever had eyes for had been Sarah, though he wasn't likely to
admit that. But Jareth knew his charm could tempt, even men had
fallen for him; he still disliked using it to his advantage.
"Is there any where more private?" e asked, glad to stall for a way
out. As he had hoped, she grabbed his hand to lead him to the back
room. Once they reached the storage space, he was glad to see an open
door. He shoved the tape in his mouth/beak, turned into the snowy barn
owl, and flew for safety. He was terribly relieved Amanda was terribly
disappointed. After all, it's not everyday David Bowie gets amnesia and
starts hitting on you. She didn't even notice a large bird fly out the door.

Music pounded through Sarah's house. The goblins had gotten
into a fight with each other just as her parents had gotten home. Sarah
would rather get screamed at for the ear-splitting "Good Charlotte"
music, on volume 10, then for having a bunch of brawling goblins.
Sarah was shoving goblins into the closet as fast as she could, wishing
she had a distraction or something.
She was almost relieved when Jareth returned. Unfortunately, he
just walked in her house right through the front door. Wearing his old
cloths.
"Sarah! I've found it!" He shouted up the stairs. Sarah could
almost see Karen wince. She clicked off her radio and zoomed
downstairs. Karen was in the living room, staring open mouthed at
Jareth, more directly his tights.
" Jareth, what the hell are you doing here? Do you want Karen to
have a heart attack?" She shouted over the goblins shouting upstairs.
Luckily Karen was too intent of the Goblin king to worry about his
subjects (actually Sarah's subjects, now).
"Suh…Suh…Sarah, do you know this man?" Karen stuttered.
Her eyes were bugging out of her head.
Sarah giggled. "Oh, yeah! He and I go way back." Sarah would
do anything to see Karen in distress, which she obviously was now.
"Actually, he and I are…you know…"
Karen's eyes got wider, if that's humanly possible. "No, I no.
Don't know…" She looked like she would die.
Jareth caught on to her game, gesturing towards her, "Come here,
Sarah love."
She walked towards him cautiously, hiding her disgust as he pulled
her towards him in a tight hug. She had to hold her breath to keep from
shout laughing at Karen's utter surprise. She did laugh when Karen
fainted. Her and Jareth laughed and laughed, eventually the Goblins
came down to check on her. They did not understand, and stood
perplexedly. "Well!" Jareth said, between laughs. The goblins joined
him, and Jareth and his inhuman crew (Sarah's inhuman crew,
actually) laughed and laughed, until Sarah punched Jareth in the arm
to get his attention. It sounded a little like this.
"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, owww." Jareth said, looking more hurt
than a goblin king aught to after being punched by a girl.
Sarah looked impressed with herself. " Back to business. Did you
get the tape." She looked at the Goblins. "Please tell me you found the
tape."
Jareth grinned at her and produced the tape like any crystal.
" You're better than I thought." She said approvingly. "Now
take your fraggin' goblins home. I don't want them."
Jareth looked at her cruelly, not unlike she had looked at him
when she had assigned this task, "There's a slight complication. You
see, the goblins are mortal, unlike me. They have the power to transfer
between worlds only once in their lifetimes. They used that, and now
they cannot get back with out their leader going into the underground,
briefly. They will automatically be forced to follow you."
Sarah looked at him blankly. "But I went through twice." She
recalled, though she had understood very little of Jareth's explanation.
"That was under my power. Now you have to go, under your
own power, or else the Goblins can never return to the Underground."
He explained to Sarah, who seemed to be a stupid goblin herself right
now. So the touch-poison had worked…
Sarah looked at him, uncomprehendingly. Why did she
suddenly feel so dumb. "I don't know how…" She paused for a moment,
trying to remember the rest of her sentence. "To go to the labyrinth."
"You don't want the Goblins here, right" Sarah nodded, then
shook her head, then did a mixture of both. She felt so weird… "Well,
first you have to say you'd do anything to get them back into the
underground."
Sarah looked at him, and slowly repeated, in mumbled words.
She handed the tape back into Jareth's gloved hands. Jareth carefully
put it down, careful not to let it touch his skin. He needed his full
aptitude to pull off this trickery.
"Okay, take my hand, and I'll guide you through. Close your
eyes and think really hard about the Labyrinth, and all the fun you had
there…." Sarah hesitantly grasped his hand, and he tapped her magick
to pull her and the goblins into the labyrinth…

Sarah woke up with a terrible headache. She was in a dark
room, lying in a huge bed with dark cherry head and feet boards. "How
did I get here...?"
"But surely you remember!" The voice next to her said. Sarah
shouted and jumped out of the bed. "Calm down. I poisoned you and
brought you here. Sarah remembered suddenly. So that is why she had
felt so strange. She remembered taking Jareth's hand, then everything
went dark.
" Relax." Jareth muttered as Sarah searched around frantically
for something to throw at him. "You were out for all of five minutes.
You landed right there."
"I want to go home!" She screeched. Perhaps not the entire
potion had worn off.
Jareth frowned a fake mocking frown. "Oh, but Sarah, surely
you remember out conversation. Mortals can only transfer through
once, under your own power."
"ERGGG!" Sarah screamed, waving her arms about
dramatically. "IT"S NOT…"
"Please, spare me Sarah" Came the annoyed reply.
Sarah ranted about the room, crashing and crushing every
breakable trinket she could find, not noticing the Farina made things
restoring themselves to wholeness at Jareth's mental orders. "You!"
Sarah pointed her finger at Jareth. "You, you can take me back! You're
not mortal!"
Jareth stood and stretched, looking as relaxed as ever. "I could."
He yawned at her. He was still tired from his escapades on Terra. "If I
wished to."
Sarah widened her eyes at his sudden reversion to obnoxious
kingly Jareth. "Well? Wish to."
"No. I need a new maid… Who wants a mortal life anyway?"
Jareth retorted, and evil smirk spreading across his face. Sarah stalked
across the room, and punched him in the stomach. Jareth doubled in
pain. "Owww! No need to be violent!"
Sarah glared at him, and he glared back. He smiled at her,
and she rested her head on his shoulder and lightly punched him on the
chest. Jareth's grinned widened, and he pulled her closer. Sarah looked
up, and kissed him lightly, then she punched him in the eye. His eyes
would've widened in surprise if they weren't already swelling.
"I hate you Jareth." She said quietly to him."
Jareth sighed in happiness. "I hate you too, love.

Sarah and Jareth had a long, abusive relationship.
They had many mutated children (for Jareth is half-goblin).
Karen did not attend their wedding reception.
Amanda went on to have 19 children. She hates kids.
The old woman had a heart attack
Fainting Sales lady went on to become a nude artist with a fetish
for tights
Balthezar, prince of darkness, and apprentice to eeevil attended
the wedding, then accepted an offer to actually become Balthezar,
prince of darkness and apprentice to eeevil, made by the great gods. She
now lives happily with Gainel, King of Dreams. This story is really
about her.
The End.