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Author of 16 Stories |
RAVEN: DECEPTION
But as I threw open your wardrobe, I knew for sure that you were gone. I looked at my ruffled and hollow self in the mirror. I hated my reflection. Smashing a fist at the mirror impulsively, it cracked as my heart shattered. From my hand blood trickled down, serving only as a momentary release for my betrayed mind.
Many were absolutely baffled by your choice, and did not hesitate to voice out their opinions and violent objections. You told me not to listen to their bitter and harsh words. I taught myself to be strong, to be able to stand against any vicious attacks just to stay by your side. I should be content. However, lately I feel your interest diminishing. Perhaps I am only but a fleeting affair?
You seemed ever so distracted and cold whenever I tried to start a conversation. You would evade everything with a careless shrug or an unfeeling stare at some random space. It hurts to be treated this way by someone I thought loved me. But I never gave up, I did my best to accommodate you and accept your behavior. You got busier as you became more successful. I could only stand at the sidelines or sit in the bleachers, watching you as you improved rapidly, gaining fame and fans. I am not afraid to admit the uneasiness I feel every time I am present at any of your matches. Those disconcerted and scornful glares directed at me were like sharp daggers stabbing at me from all directions.
You asked me - why am I so affected? I did not answer you because you looked away immediately after asking that question casually. You did not really give a damn. Do you know how much it hurts me to see your name linked up with any renowned female star that crosses your path? In the news, there were always gossip articles of you if not about your startling achievements.
I feared that you would leave me. This dread grew significantly with each day and if I failed to have you with me each night, in our apartment, I hated how my imagination would run recklessly wild. But whatever it is, you are gone now.
I recently read about you being accepted into the NBA - that had always been your most passionate ambition. I am happy for you, Kaede. I think about how calm you would be in spite of this great honor. Your cobalt blue eyes that never fail to make me self-conscious, your raven silken hair, the stoic expression on your face, and the iciness you radiate.
Did you really love me? Did you really care? I do not believe those words you whispered whenever we had sex. I did, and I still regret it.
"Hanamichi, I missed you."
Liar. I smile, genuinely. My heart had been broken, how true that would be. Despite so, right this minute, I cannot wait to tell you how I did not cry when you left without a word, on that cold emotionless night.