Standard disclaimers apply.

Notes: First ever Naruto fic, featuring my most fave pairing. I was actually into the pairing first before I read up on the manga and watched the anime. 'Tis all influence...
Anyways, lime scenes ahead. Pardon me if I didn't do them well enough (the lime scenes, I mean) and also for any OOCness. That said, I hope you guys enjoy reading this. Thank you! (grinz)

- : - Love Handles - : -

"Iruka-sensei, you seem to be getting chubbier lately."

The comment floored Iruka completely. Chubbier? Instinctively, he reached to cup his cheeks. They felt slightly fleshier than usual, he must admit. Oh no! This could not be happening!

"Chubbier? He looks fine to me," grunted Naruto as he gazed critically at his beloved teacher.

Sakura rolled her eyes. "Men!" she spat before realizing her mistake. She blushed as she quickly turned back to Iruka with an apology. "Ah, I didn't mean that. I mean, men generally are not concerned about their looks, but well, that's stereotyping. I mean, Iruka-sensei seems concerned so then what I say doesn't really apply to you and –"

"It's alright, Sakura," the chuunin sighed dejectedly.

Sakura opened her mouth to say more, but Naruto cut in first. "But why would Iruka-sensei be concerned? Huh, Iruka-sensei? Tell me, tell me!"

Iruka was taken aback. A blush crept up his cheeks then as he desperately tried to think of why he was concerned in the first place. Sakura was squinting at him, as if trying to figure him out as well. As she had correctly pointed out earlier, men are generally not concerned about their looks. So why should he?

"Er, well, a ninja has to always keep fit. It makes it easier to move around and fight. Fats will only be in the way."

Naruto did not look convinced. "Chouji is fat. And so is the entire Akimichi family. But they make good ninjas too. I don't see what the big deal is."

So Naruto was pretty quick in realizing his pathetic attempt at a lie. Even Sakura looked impressed, which was quite an amazing feat. "I have to say I agree with Naruto. It is pretty strange that Iruka-sensei gets worked up over this. I had expected you to laugh my comment off."

Iruka was trapped. What to say now? These two were no longer the twelve years-old he had taught before. They were now fifteen, with overactive hormones and a sense of reality. Lies would not work anymore, as was proven a while ago.

But unexpectedly, Naruto spoke up, his voice brimming with enthusiasm. "I know why!" he practically shouted. "Iruka-sensei has a girlfriend! That is why he gets worked up about being chubbier!"

Sakura's eyes rounded as the possibility of Naruto's words set in. She turned to Iruka, clearly excited. "Is it true, Iruka-sensei? You have a girlfriend? That is so sweet! You must introduce her to us! Who is she?"

"Yeah, tell us, tell us!" Naruto exclaimed.

Iruka's heart had stopped beating. Please let this be a dream, he prayed. But he knew it was just wishful thinking on his part. He willed for his cheeks to regain their normal colors, but that was probably going to take forever, judging from how hot they were now. Please let the Akatsuki strike now, he prayed even harder.

"So? Who is she?" Naruto prodded, peering close.

Calm down, calm down… "I have no girl –"

"LIAR!" the two yelled together.

Oh, kami-sama! Iruka felt faint, his surroundings seemingly spinning around him. Get a hold of yourself. He took in a deep breath, another deep breath, a third deep breath, and finally spoke. "You guys are right. I did have a girlfriend."

"Did?" Trust Sakura to take notice.

He nodded, allowing his face to take on a melancholy mask. "We just broke up. It was hard for me, so I guess I had been eating a lot to take my mind of it."

Naruto frowned. "How come you never told me about this?"

"You were away with Jiraiya-sama, remember? We started dating only a year back, but it was a quiet affair so no one knew about us anyway." He made an effort to look pained, as if it hurt to remember.

Sakura was instantly sympathetic. "I'm so sorry, Iruka-sensei. I didn't know… oh dear, I feel bad for bringing up such bad memories. I'm so sorry, Iruka-sensei…"

Iruka allowed a sad smile to faintly touch his lips. I can't believe I'm so good at this. Perhaps I should consider a career change. "It's alright, Sakura. You have nothing to feel bad about. But, if I may, can we pretend this conversation never took place?"

Naruto looked like he was about to burst, face reddened at an effort to be understanding. But Iruka knew the question the blond teen had in mind – who was this mysterious girlfriend?

Sakura knew it too, for she was patting (thumping hard was more like it) Naruto's back. "Yes, of course. This conversation never did happen, as far as we are concerned, right Naruto?"

This girl even mimicked Godaime's purring technique perfectly! Iruka made a show of looking grateful, and proceeded to quickly change the subject.

- o -

He made sure the curtains were drawn and the lights dimmed. Then, standing before the full-length mirror which he had bought that afternoon, he stripped to his boxers and started to critically examine himself.

His cheeks were indeed fleshy, and there was a hint of a double chin. Iruka puffed up his cheeks and frowned. On others, such an expression might be called adorable, but not on him; he looked more like a blowfish.

His eyes moved to his reflection's neck. It seemed rather thick but thankfully, not to the extent of bulging. Next stop was his chest, predominantly his breasts. Seemed rather full. He cupped himself, pressing, kneading and feeling. Yes, a bit of added flesh there. He sighed dejectedly.

It was time for the main course. Iruka winced at the sight of his obviously meaty abdomen. He turned to the side, observing his tummy in the mirror. Rather than the flat plane he was accustomed to seeing to (which was quite sometime ago), there was the unwanted presence of a beer belly. His perfect six-packs were no more. Oh, the horror!

Slowly he turned back to the front, shoulders hunched. It made his love handles even more pronounced, seemingly hanging off his sides like the giant slobs of fats that they were. Iruka groaned, a pitiful wail of anguish.

Sakura was wrong. He was not getting chubbier; he was getting fatter! He was really asking for it when he stuffed his face with food almost every hour and not really getting any exercises done. But really, what was he to do? When trying to keep himself busy with work did not help at all, it seemed like eating was the only activity that comfort him. But perhaps it was all psychological, this continuous need to eat as if to fulfill an insatiable hunger, a hunger that gnawed at him for two whole months now.

Sighing again, he picked up his clothes off the floor and turned to head towards his bed. Absently, he gazed in the direction of the windows, and it was then when he stopped short, eyes rounding in disbelief.

"Ka… kashi… sensei?"

The silver-haired jounin was squatting on the window sill, having pushed the curtains aside. Iruka could not believe his attention to his surroundings had lapsed; had it been an enemy, he would be long dead, and in his boxers, no less.

"Yo!" Kakashi waved, his visible eye closed indicating that he was smiling under that cloth mask.

Hastily, Iruka covered his body with his armful of clothes. His cheeks burned, but he hoped that Kakashi would not notice it. "You… I mean, your mission is over?"

Kakashi nodded. "Yeah. Though no one knows I'm back yet, except you that is."

"Ah, ok." Iruka felt rather dumb at his meek response.

Silence stretched between them. Iruka avoided looking directly at Kakashi as he kept pressing his clothes closer, hoping his love handles were adequately hidden since they were the more prominent ones.

"You have not welcomed me back," Kakashi commented quietly then.

Iruka looked up, feeling totally guilty. "Oh, I'm sorry," he quickly apologized. He lowered his eyes slightly. "Okaeri nasai."

"Tadaima."

Iruka raised his eyes once more, and instantly tensed when Kakashi got off the sill and walked towards him. Despite the dimness, Iruka could read the intention in the jounin's good eye. Instinctively, he took a couple of small steps back, as if trying to create a distance between them.

"Kakashi-sensei, I'm tired… I have to get up early tomor –"

"I'm tired too, Iruka-sensei," the jounin cut in, the underlying meaning under those simple words reverberating loud and clear.

Iruka debated on whether to push the older man away or to keep covering himself. But he knew that either way, Kakashi would eventually see what he desperately wanted to hide. And before he knew it, the silver haired man was already before him, amusement written all over his forehead.

"Kakashi-sensei, no…" Iruka whispered his protest.

But Kakashi had already lowered the cloth that veiled half of his face. Such a beautiful face, and it never failed to steal Iruka's breath away. And while that happened, Kakashi had already cupped the chuunin's chin and was now leaning forward to steal a kiss.

"No…" was what Iruka wanted to say, but the word was somehow lost when Kakashi's warm lips descended upon his.

The kiss started out with tentative little nips, as if it was their first time, teasing and exploring. It built up in momentum then as their hunger got the better of them, tongues tangling in an erotic dance of taste and possession. By now, Iruka had unconsciously let go of his clothes and was holding onto Kakashi's shoulders as if for support. Kakashi tugged at the band that held the chuunin's hair in a ponytail, and when it came loose, he eagerly buried his fingers in the silky tresses.

Iruka felt himself being dragged across the room and then pushed roughly onto his bed. He tried to see past the haze that clouded his vision, and what he saw was a stripping Kakashi. That pricked a realization in him and he quickly sat up, pressing against the headboard and covering himself with his hands like a virgin on her wedding night.

Kakashi was now in his briefs, standing by the side of the bed. Iruka wanted to tear his eyes away from those lean, rippling muscles but he could not. The jounin was the epitome of masculinity, artfully sculpted with perfect hard edges and flat dimensions. Not an ounce of unwanted fat marred that beautiful body.

The jounin climbed onto the bed then, movement sleek and lithe. His mismatched eyes were trained assiduously on the chuunin as he inched closer, and Iruka closed his eyes tight then, drawing his knees up for added defense, however futile that was.

"Iruka-sensei… look at me," Kakashi coaxed as he planted butterfly kisses on Iruka's knees.

Iruka shook his head, eyes shut tighter still. The bed creaked as Kakashi moved, and Iruka sensed the jounin beside him then. The butterfly kisses found their way on his shoulders.

"Iruka-sensei, do you know that I was watching you the whole time you were in front of that mirror? Touching yourself like that, making those adorable expressions… you really turned me on."

Iruka stiffened, and felt his entire body going hot. "You lie…" he croaked, desperate to believe otherwise.

Moist lips nibbled playfully at his cheek then. "I don't mind, you know. The women in Icha-Icha Paradise are often described with big boobs and rounded hips. Fleshy is good. It's sexy…"

Iruka's eyes snapped open and he turned to look at the grinning jounin. "You're mocking me!" he shrieked.

Kakashi's grin only widened as he hooked a finger under the chuunin's chin. "No, I am not. It's just that you amuse me." Tilting Iruka's face upward slightly, he then scraped his teeth across the fleshy underside lightly.

Iruka moaned slightly at the blissful sensation, and felt his throat tightening. Kakashi went on to bite his way down Iruka's neck, while his hands deftly coaxed the chuunin to lower his knees. At the back of his mind, Iruka was still conscious about his current chubby state but Kakashi was handling him so well that he reluctantly gave in to the jounin.

Kakashi was straddling him now, whispering for him to ease down flat on the bed to which he complied. The silver-haired man grabbed hold of Iruka's hands, forcing them off his body and pinning them against the headboard. Iruka closed his eyes again, his cheeks growing hot again when Kakashi started on his fleshy chest area.

"Delicious," the jounin purred as he nipped and teased.

"Ka…kashi… aah… sensei… stop…"

Instead of stopping, Kakashi intensified his ministrations, very much enjoying himself while the chuunin writhed and gasped breathlessly under him. Kakashi let go of Iruka's hands then as his lips deftly moved on to the next target: the beer belly. Biting and licking, Kakashi was really having much fun.

Iruka could only grip the bedsheets tight. Much as he felt embarrassed, the jounin did make him feel so good. But perhaps, he had missed the other's touch very much. A low moan escaped him then when Kakashi kneaded at his love handles.

"What did I tell you? Fleshy is good," the older man teased before sinking his teeth at Iruka's side. "And you taste really good too."

"I'm not food!" Iruka cried out indignantly before gasping out at the erotic sensation that claimed him.

Soon, the only thought that clouded the chuunin's mind was to feel his lover deep in him. He whispered for the silver-haired man to be quick, to finally appease the hunger in him. Kakashi was more than willing to comply, preparing the chuunin first before entering, slow and tentative. But the time that was stolen from them was immediately felt and the increase in tempo was equally instantaneous. The thrusts came in fierce and urgent, matched by Iruka's and Kakashi's quickened, breathless gasps. Their unison cries of release ended their long-awaited fulfillment then, raw and honest as their fiery passion for each other.

Kakashi collapsed fully atop Iruka, head face-down beside Iruka's. For a while neither moved, catching their breaths as they slowly pulled through from the enthralling miasma that never failed to blanket them warm. The scent of their lovemaking was strong and distinct in the air, a silent testimonial of their contentment.

"I've missed you," Kakashi whispered as he pulled back slightly to gaze upon his lover's face.

"As have I," Iruka concurred, smiling warmly.

The jounin grinned, his mismatched eyes filled with glee as one hand reached to pinch Iruka's cheek. "I can see that."

"Kakashi-sensei!"

But the older man was not done with his teasing. "I wonder what would happen if I were to be called away on a six-month mission? I'd probably not recognize you and even mistook you for a long-lost relative of the Akimichi clan."

"You're really heartless!" wailed Iruka as he tried to push the jounin off him.

Kakashi caught Iruka's hands and pinned them once more to the headboard. His eyes then lazily assessed the chuunin's heaving chest. "You're fine as it is, Iruka-sensei. Just bear in mind that if I had wanted to go for looks, what am I doing with you in the first?"

And before Iruka could go all defensive again, Kakashi silenced his lover with a kiss. "Thank you for waiting," he whispered then when they drew apart. Iruka merely gave him a shy smile. Kakashi ran his fingers lovingly through the chuunin's long hair, and unexpectedly his face turned serious. "Ne, Iruka-sensei…"

"Hmm?"

"Can I spend the night here?"

Iruka looked slightly bewildered. "Ah, sure."

"That's good. Tomorrow at 7am, we shall start."

"Start what?"

The devil reincarnate grinned widely then. "Your exercise regimen."

And the night echoed with the cry of an anguished one.

-. - owari - . -

p/s: So in case you notice, this fic isnt about love handles per se. It's just a silly pun, ya know, if you truly love someone, you'll accept him or her the way he is and handle him just as well (ok, so I'm not a love therapist, sue me XD).