I don’t own Detective Conan/Case Closed, Magic Kaito, or any of the characters.

I use the Japanese names, so here’s the name guide:

Shinichi Kudo – Jimmy Kudo

Ran Mori – Rachael Moore

Kogoro Mori – Richard Moore

Mitsuhiko – Mitch

Genta – George

Ayumi – Amy

Megure – Meguire

Heiji – Harley

This chapter’s Japanese-to-English guide:

Kuso – Damn

Che – Hmph

kun – (polite suffix attached to the names of boys)

Hai – Yes

Sensei – Teacher

Gomen – Sorry

Mou – Geez

Un – Yea

Tadaima – I’m home/I’m back

neechan – Big sister

Arigatou – Thank you

Tousan – Dad/father

Kaasan – Mom/mother

Counterattack

Chapter 1: Nightmares

“Why didn’t you save her!”

Haibara…I…

“Why couldn’t you save my sister?”

I…

He ran as fast as he could from the shadows and familiar voices, but they kept on chasing him.

I didn’t mean to!

“If you’re such a great detective, why couldn’t you save her!”

No……I didn’t mean for that to happen!

He continued to run, eyes squeezed shut and hands over his ears as the voices followed him.

“She’s dead!”

“Even with your efforts, she still died!”

But I wanted to stop it…! I really tried…!

“You’re no different from the murderers! DETECTIVE!”

Conan sat bolt upright in bed, “NO!” He looked around wildly, breathing hard and sweating as he clutched the sheets tightly, gasping for breath. I didn’t mean to…I tried to save them……why couldn’t I have been just a little faster…? He looked shakily at his hands, still breathing hard. He looked over at Kogoro, who was fast asleep, then sighed and wiped sweat off his forehead. He clenched his hands into fists and slammed them into the ground. Kuso! No matter how hard I try……whether as Kudo Shinichi or Edogawa Conan……I’m almost always too late! Why can’t I save them!

“Kuso…”

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“Yawn!”

“You look really tired, Conan-kun,” Ayumi blinked at the boy as she sat at her desk at school.

“I didn’t get much sleep…” Conan mumbled, rubbing his eyes under the glasses. That stupid nightmare had me up all night……dammit. That’s the third night in a row.

“Staying up reading again? Che…how dull,” Genta muttered.

Conan sweatdropped. It wouldn’t hurt for you to try picking up a book or two, Genta…

The teacher walked in, and everyone took their seats.

Conan yawned again. Maybe I can catch a nap in grammar class. I’ve heard it all before, anyway…

As the teacher started speaking about reading, Conan felt his eyes closing as he held his book in front of his face like everyone else.

“Why couldn’t you help him?”

“He was so young……and he still died!”

“Right in front of you! It’s your fault!”

No…

“You only care about catching the criminals! What about when the criminal becomes a victim?”

I do care…

“You’re so cold!”

I’m not!

“All you want is to make a name for yourself! You could care less about the people involved in the crimes! As long as it establishes a name for you!”

No! That’s not true! That’s far from the truth!

“What do you know about truth?”

“You’re just a kid! Seventeen…seven……you’re still a kid!”

“You know nothing!”

“You just want a name! You want to be known! You stand by with the police at the end like nothing happened! Just like that boy who died! Because of your deduction!”

“You could care less!”

“Edogawa-kun?”

No…

“Cold hearted detective! It’s your fault!”

But…I didn’t mean for it to happen! I tried to save him…!

“But you were too late! He still died in that fire! And it was all because of your deductions!”

Please believe me! I tried…!

“Edogawa-kun!”

“You could care less!”

No, no, no!

“EDOGAWA-KUN!”

Conan jerked awake, falling off his chair and landing painfully on the ground.

Laughter from the class followed a moment later.

Conan blinked and looked up, “Eh?”

The teacher put her hands on her hips and looked at him.

Conan laughed innocently. Kuso……those dreams again. He looked around and saw even the other members of the Shounen Tantei laughing at him. Even those guys, too…?

“Back to your seat, Edogawa-kun! Please don’t fall asleep in my class again!”

“Hai, sensei! Gomen!” Conan said in his best cute-kid voice and got back onto his seat, rubbing his head.

The teacher went back to the front to continue the lesson.

Haibara, who was sitting next to him, glanced over at him, “You usually don’t fall asleep in class. Even if it is the second time in elementary school…”

“Ah…” Conan sighed, resting his chin on his palm and resting his arm on the desk, “I didn’t get much sleep lately.”

Haibaralooked at him from the corner of her eyes. You can’t fool me, Kudo. Well, that’s what you get for bottling all your emotions up inside. Then again…she looked down at the desk. …I shouldn’t be one to talk. She smirked humorlessly.

---

“Conan-kun! Mou…wake up!”

Conan blinked and yawned, “Eh?”

“You nearly slept through all of lunch!” Mitsuhiko informed him.

“Nn?” Conan rubbed his eyes and yawned.

“Don’t waste your food, Conan!” Genta pointed.

“Ah……” Conan laughed nervously and poked at it. I’m not really hungry, though……

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Ayumi asked.

“I’m fine,” Conan smiled, then packed his lunch back up, “I’m not hungry. I’ll save it for a snack later.”

“I should do that…” Genta mused, “I’ll ask my mom to pack extra!”

“Your mom already packs extra in your lunch, Genta-kun,” Mitsuhiko grinned.

“Hey…I’m a growing boy!” Genta retorted.

Ayumi and Mitsuhiko laughed.

Haibarasmirked, then glanced at Conan.

Conan sighed, staring off into space. Those dreams again……they were really yelling at me this time until Ayumi-chan woke me up…he blinked when he felt a hand go to his forehead.

“You feel kinda warm…” Ayumi frowned, placing a hand to her own forehead. “And you’re all sweaty…”

“Ah…it was just a weird dream. And the perspiration is what’s making me feel a little warmer then usual,” Conan smiled, pulling back from her touch, “So it’s nothing!”

“If you’re sure…”

“Un!” Conan nodded, blowing out a relieved breath when Ayumi turned back to talk to Mitsuhiko about something. He looked over at Haibara, “What?”

Haibara shrugged, “Nothing.”

“You want to say something, don’t you?”

“Perhaps. Perhaps not. You already know what I want to say,” Haibara shrugged again, then took her seat once more.

“Che,” Conan muttered, then yawned again. Stupid dreams……giving me a headache.

The school day seemed to drag on longer then usual, and Conan was glad to say ‘goodbye’ to his friends and walk back home.

“Tadaima!” Conan called as he opened the door.

“Conan-kun! You’re early!” Ran smiled at him.

“Ah……I didn’t get much sleep…I’m gonna take a nap,” Conan smiled.

“Okay,” Ran nodded, then blinked, “Are you alright?”

“Eh?”

“You’re sweating…” Ran stated.

“Oh…haha…I was really glad school ended, so I ran home,” Conan stammered out, then went into the room he shared with Kogoro and all but collapsed on the futon. He was asleep in seconds.

“It’s your fault.”

Not again! It’s not my fault! I tried…!

“It’s not good enough!”

“And why do you leave all the time!”

His eyes widened at that voice, and he spun around. Ran…

She was standing there, tears in her eyes running down her cheeks.

“You leave all the time. Are your cases really more important to you then me?”

He reached out. No, Ran! That’s not true!

“Maybe father’s right……I should just stop waiting for you already…you always leave and never come back. Always. And nothing ever bothers you! It’s not normal!”

But…Ran…I……I don’t like to see anyone hurt…that’s why…

“So you choose to hurt me!”

No, it’s not like that! I…!

“I don’t want to hear it! I…I hate you!”

His eyes widened.

“Conan-kun! Conan-kun! Wake up!”

Conan’s eyes shot open, and he bolted upright on the futon, breathing hard and shaking from the nightmare. He looked over and saw Ran kneeling next to him, a concerned look on her face.

“You were calling out in your sleep……you kept saying ‘no’ and you were thrashing around when I came in…” Ran started, then stopped when she saw a tear run down his face. “C-Conan-kun…”

Conan gulped in air and looked at the sheets, wiping his eyes. He blinked when, for the second time that day, a hand went to his forehead.

“Hmm...you're reall warm!” Ran exclaimed. She stood up, “I’ll get you some water and medicine! Get changed into your pajamas and lay back down, okay?”

Conan watched her leave the room, his mind in turmoil as he did what she said.

He didn’t say anything when she returned, or even after he took the medicine and drank the water. He shivered.

Ran gently ran a hand through his hair, causing him to look up at her. “What was…?”

“Na, Ran-neechan……”

“Hmm?”

“Do…do you hate me?”

Ran looked shocked, “Of course not! Where would you get a stupid idea like that!”

Conan looked down at the sheets, stammering before he finally got his next question out, his fists clenching the sheets, “D…do you hate Shinichi-niichan?”

“Eh?” Ran blinked, “Why are you asking me that?”

“Please tell me!” Conan looked up at her, his eyes shining with tears and fever.

“I could never hate him,” Ran responded, smiling at him.

He stared at her for a few moments, “Even…even though he disappears a lot to work on cases…?”

“Shinichi is a good person,” Ran smiled wistfully, “It hurts sometimes……but I don’t hate him. It’s just the opposite.”

Conan blinked, looking back up at her in surprise.

“But why do you ask?” Ran looked at him.

“I…just a weird dream…that’s all…” Conan said in a whisper, then stiffened slightly when he felt a pair of arms encircle him.

“It was just a dream,” Ran assured him, hugging him, “Relax…it’s okay.”

Conan smiled a bit and rested his pounding head on her shoulder, closing his eyes. She doesn’t hate me……thank goodness… “Arigatou, Ran-neechan.”

“For what?”

Conan didn’t reply, but just smiled. For being here and not hating me. Arigatou.

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“Aren’t you hungry, Conan-kun?” Ran asked at dinner.

“Ah…” Conan laughed nervously. Ungh…I still don’t feel well…

Kogoro glared at the boy, “It’s not good to waste food, gaki!”

“Um…um…” Conan stammered, then somehow managed to eat the food.

“That’s better,” Kogoro nodded, “Aren’t they teaching you kids anything in school? Like how it’s bad to waste food? Sheesh…”

Ran just sighed. Mou…

---

He looked around. Where…?

Two large men in black appeared.

What…?

“We know who you really are, Edogawa Conan. Or, should I say, Kudo Shinichi!”

H-how?

“We know everything. And everyone…”

He rushed at them, but they vanished. He spun around when he heard a scream and a laugh. His eyes widened.

The two men in black had Agasa tied up and up against a wall. Gin was holding a gun to the man’s head.

Wait…!

BLAM! Gin fired the gun. Blood went flying.

Agasa-hagase? He started forward, but tripped and fell to the ground, eyes wide as he stared at the lifeless corpse of Agasa.

“We’re only getting started, ‘detective’.”

He spun around, eyes blazing as he charged at them. Stop…!

Vodka stepped in and knocked him down. “Not so big now, are you? Oh, right…you’re SMALL! HA!”

“The show is just getting started,” Gin smirked, and made a motion with his hands.

What…?

Heiji was tied up next, bruised and beaten.

Hattori! He got to his feet, but found that he couldn’t move. Don’t hurt him! I’m the one you want!

“Everyone around you must die…even if they don’t know,” Gin smirked, “And especially if they DO know.” He raised the gun to Heiji’s head.

Stop!

The gun fired.

“Two down.”

Stop, stop, stop! He found that he couldn’t close his eyes or look away. He stared in horror at the bleeding corpse of Heiji. Hattori…

“You got him involved…it’s your fault. You got both of them involved.”

Stop…please… He sunk down to his knees.

“Hey, like I said…the show is only starting.”

This isn’t a game…!

“You’re right. This is what it’s going to be,” Gin indicated to his left.

Haibara?

Said girl was tied to a chair, eyes hidden yet seemingly downcast.

“She actually wants to die. Interesting, isn’t it? Can you protect her, ‘detective’?”

Don’t hurt her! He rushed over as fast as he could.

Gin pulled out the gun.

He seemed to be moving slower. What…?

The gun went off, instantly killing a now-adult Haibara.

His eyes widened, and he trembled.

“Looks like you couldn’t protect her, after all,” Gin smirked.

“And just wait until you see who we found next. Let’s see…everyone who knows you, so…” Vodka’s voice came from the right.

Looking over, his eyes widened again, and he lunged forward. NO! They have no idea! They don’t know! They have nothing…nothing to do with this!

Ayumi, Mitsuhiko, and Genta were tied up together, eyes wide in fear.

“What a problem…how do we kill all three at once?” Gin tapped his chin.

You don’t! They don’t know! They don’t know! For some reason, he couldn’t move. His feet were frozen to the ground. Ayumi-chan! Genta! Mitsuhiko! Run! Stand up and run!

The kids looked at him, eyes wide.

“Who are you, Conan?” Genta asked, his voice haunted.

“You aren’t really Conan-kun, are you?” Mitsuhiko whispered.

Ayumi sniffled, “Why didn’t you tell us…?”

He could only stare in shock.

Suddenly, there was gasoline all around the kids, and even some on them.

His eyes widened when he saw Gin light up a match.

No! Stop! Don’t! They’re just innocent kids!

“Even if they don’t know, they still know you. Say goodbye to your ‘friends’, ‘detective’. Maybe they’ll forgive you in the next world……eventually!” Gin laughed like a maniac and tossed the match on top of them.

NO!

There was a horrid scream, and then nothing as the blaze continued, lighting up the other bodies on the ground.

“Oh, we almost forgot…who else knows…”

He looked over and gasped. Mom…? Dad…?

The two looked up with saddened expressions on their faces as they were tied together.

“Shall I demonstrate my shooting abilities?” Gin pulled out a gun for each hand and aimed one at Yusaku and the other at Yukiko.

No! Stop! Don’t hurt them! Don’t kill them!

Two shots went off at just about the same time.

He watched in horror as the bleeding bodies of his parents fell to the ground.

“And now for the ones that have been hiding you.”

His eyes went even wider and he turned around. Tied up in one corner was Kogoro and Eri.

Wait! They don’t know, either…!

“That won’t stop us, you know. They were hiding you. Whether they knew or not matters nothing to us,” Gin pointed the guns at the two again.

Stop…please! He didn’t know how long he had been crying…and he wished he could move. Instead, he was forced to watch helplessly as the two were killed as well. NO!

“And now……the final one. I want you to watch this one closely, detective.”

He tried to close his eyes, but it didn’t work. Instead, he was frozen to the spot as they mercilessly beat upon Ran. He tried to move, and kept shouting out for her.

When she stopped moving and just looked up, half conscious, her gaze landed right on him.

Ran…

“Why……Shinichi? Why…didn’t you…tell me…?” Tears ran down her face.

Ran…!

Gin put the gun to Ran’s head.

Stop! Not Ran! He pulled out of the frozen stupor that he had been in and rushed forward. He saw the trigger being pulled back. He leapt over… RAN!

The gun went off.

“Too late, detective.”

RAN!

He woke up, screaming. Before Kogoro could hit him for the noise, he was up and running to the bathroom, where he lost his dinner to the toilet.

A sleepy Ran poked her head out of her room, then followed her father to the bathroom and looked in. “What’s going on……? Conan-kun!” She went over and knelt down next to his shaking form as he heaved into the toilet again. She gently started to rub his back, then turned to her shocked father, “Tousan! Get a glass of water for him!”

Kogoro nodded, then hurried out.

“Ran-neechan……”

“Shh,” Ran shook her head, continuing to rub his back until he just stood there, shaking.

Tears ran down his face, and he slowly looked at her. “You…you’re okay…”

“Of course I am!” Ran shook her head, “Did you have a nightmare, Conan-kun?”

He broke down right there and then…being in a child’s body making it easier for such a breakdown. “They got everyone! Mom and dad and Agasa-hagase and Hattori and occhan and your mom and Haibara and the kids and then…and then…they got you, too! And I couldn’t do anything! Everyone…and it was all my fault! All my fault!”

Ran was shocked, then shook her head and wrapped her arms around him, rocking him back and forth gently, “Shh. We’re all okay, Conan-kun. It was just a dream.”

Kogoro came in with the glass of water, and handed it over.

“Conan-kun, here,” Ran tried to hand him the water, but he had latched onto her and wouldn’t let go. “Conan-kun……”

“Don’t go…don’t go…”

Ran put the glass of water down on the floor and held him.

Kogoro sprayed an air freshener in the bathroom and flushed the toilet, then looked at the two, “Will you handle it, Ran?”

Ran nodded, “Thanks, tousan.”

Kogoro yawned and left to go back to sleep.

Ran had Conan sit in her lap as she held him, running a hand through his sweaty bangs and nearly gasping at how much his fever had shot up. She picked up the glass of water and handed it to him. “Drink some water. Now.”

Conan nodded and sipped at it, still shaking. She’s okay…it was just a dream. Just a dream. But it was so real! Ran…tears ran down his face again.

“Shh…don’t cry, Conan-kun. That must have been really scary,” Ran shook her head, trying to recall a time when their little charge cried and came up with nothing. It must have been really bad, whatever it was, to make him be like this. “It’s okay.”

Conan sniffled and wiped his eyes with his sleeve, shivering.

Ran put the glass of water down and gently scooped him up, then walked to the kitchen and started to prepare some tea with one hand while she held the trembling boy in the other. She wanted to put him down, but she had a feeling that she shouldn’t. Plus, he had a death-grip on her pajama sleeve.

Half an hour later, Conan had finished the tea and taken some medicine for his fever. The two now sat on Ran’s bed, with Conan still being a little clingy and clutching her sleeve with one hand while he stared into space, still trembling.

Ran put an arm around him and held him close, then wrapped her other arm around him when he still trembled. “Calm down, Conan-kun. It’s okay.”

Conan looked up at her. It’s not okay, Ran! Can it be right that…that they’ll come after you whether you know or not? It…it makes sense, after all. They won’t care to hear excuses. They’ll just think that you’re hiding the truth from them, and…and…

“You’re trembling again……stop thinking about it, Conan-kun.” She smiled comfortingly down at him, “You can sleep with me, okay?”

“Wait! Ran…I…”

“I’m ‘Ran-neechan’, remember?” Ran smiled.

“Listen! There’s something I gotta tell you!” Conan pulled apart from her embrace, shivering as he wrapped his arms around himself for a moment, “I’m…I’m not really……I’m not really Edogawa Conan!”

Ran blinked. “What are you talking about…?”

“Please…just listen…okay? Just let me finish?” Conan gulped. I have to tell her. Those guys will go after her whether she knows or not. If she knows and tells them, maybe they’ll spare her. If she doesn’t know and can’t tell them, they defiantly won’t spare her. Ran…I’m so sorry. You may hate me now, but……

Ran eyed him.

Conan pulled off his glasses, “Ran…I’m really……Kudo Shinichi. That night at Tropical Land…I ran off to follow one of the guys in black that had been on the coaster with us, remember? That was the dumbest mistake of my life!” He sat down on the far side of Ran’s bed since she sat at the front. He couldn’t even look her in the eyes…he couldn’t even look at her face. He didn’t want to see the horror he knew would be there, and the disbelief.

He continued, “I saw something I shouldn’t have seen…something about them. One of the guys snuck up behind me and knocked me out. Then, they fed me some sort of poison. It was supposed to kill me. I thought I was gonna die. Seriously, I did! But when I woke up……I was in this body. I met up with Agasa-hagase, and he said I shouldn’t tell anyone who I really am in case if they try to hurt someone. But then I realized just now that if they figure out who I really am, even if you don’t know, they’ll still go after you because they’ll believe that you were hiding me! And you’ll still get hurt! Everyone will!” Tears gathered in his eyes, “I don’t want that. I don’t want anyone to get hurt!” I should have just gone into hiding. “The two guys are called Gin and Vodka…they’re part of an organization. A really evil one. The Black Organization is what they’re called. And I can explain all the times when you’ve seen me even though Conan was in the room as well. The first time, I’d asked Agasa-hagase to call using a voice changer…I use it to call you. It’s in the bowtie of my cloths. He made it for me. Other times, kaasan covered for me. She dressed up as Conan’s mother.”

Ran was completely silent.

Conan pushed on before he lost all his confidence, “The time when we first met Hattori, the Chinese alcohol he had given me counteracted the poison the Organization gave me somehow, and turned me back. That’s why ‘Conan’ disappeared and ‘Shinichi’ reappeared. I headed out of the room and hid in the bathroom cause I didn’t want you to see me transform.”

Silence again.

Conan gulped and continued, “The…the second time…in…I mean, when I returned home……it was a 24-hour antidote. We didn’t know how long it would last. Haibara covered for me…she dressed up as Conan and used the voice-changer to disguise her voice. I disappeared after the case in the restaurant because the effect had worn off and I was changing back into Conan. I would have given anything for it to last just a few more minutes so I could return to you!” Tears ran down his face, and he quickly wiped them away, cursing the child body that allowed it. “I can prove it. The 24-hour antidote still exists. I’ll take it and show you. That it’s me.”

More silence.

Conan still couldn’t bring himself to look at her, “You have to believe me! I never wanted to hurt you! I never intended for it to get this far! I didn’t want to lie to you or…or to watch you cry…or when you got really sad……I wanted to be there, but I couldn’t, because I was in this damn body!” He gripped his hair, squeezing his eyes shut in pain. “I wanted to tell you so much…! I almost did a couple times! I almost told you the very first night! I honestly didn’t mean for it to get so far, Ran! Please believe me! You can hit me or be angry at me……I’ll understand! Just please…don’t hate me…! I didn’t mean…!” The tears were coming down his face, and he made no move to wipe them off.

Ran spoke just then, eyes hidden by her bangs and her face bowed, “Get out.”

Conan blinked, causing more tears to roll down his cheeks.

“You lied to me…I trusted you! I trusted you, and you still lied to me! You were always there! I bet you thought it was funny, seeing me crying because of you! And you were right there!”

“Ran…I didn’t think it was funny! I couldn’t do anything! I wanted to, believe me, I…!”

“Shut up!”

Conan yelped as he was hit by a thrown pillow, and fell off the bed, wondering when he had backed so far up that he was on the edge. He rubbed his head and looked up.

“I don’t want to see you…what am I supposed to think or say, Shinichi! Living with us the entire time……all the time you were…you were……you were really Shinichi!”

A clap of thunder struck outside, followed by a flash of lightening.

“Get out!” Ran shouted, tears running down her face as she threw another pillow at him, half standing, “Get out of here!”

Conan felt his heart breaking then, but he knew he deserved it. It’s better this way, if she hates me……he scrambled out of the room, and the door slammed behind him. He could hear her crying on the other side, and sighed. “Ran……please believe me when I say I’m sorry…”

“How can I believe you after all the lies you’ve told?”

Conan looked at the ground, a humorless smirk on his face as tears rolled down his cheeks. He slowly went into the room that he shared with Kogoro, and got dressed. A navy turtleneck and a pair of khaki pants went on, then his orange hat to help ward off the rain outside. He packed his things and sighed, then pulled out a piece of notebook paper and thought for a moment before writing down his message to her. You may not believe me, Ran……but please, at least look at this. And don’t get involved with them. Please. He stood up and walked out of the room, placing the paper down on the table and putting the empty tea cup on it as a paperweight. Taking one last look around the room, he put his sneakers on and left.

Gomen, Ran. Maybe I’ll be back…if I live through hunting down the Organization. I have nowhere else to turn to. Unless I want to put them in danger, too. So the only thing I can do is to find them and stop them. Only then, can I face you again. Even if it’s to say goodbye if you hate me. You never actually said you hated me…so I’ll try my best to come back. Even for the slight hope that you can forgive me.

Ran……hontou ni, gomen nasai. Soshite……aishiteru.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Ending sentence:

“Ran…I’m really sorry. And…I love you.”

I couldn’t put the translation to the final sentence of the chapter in the beginning with the others without spoiling it.

Things will start to pick up in the next chapter.

Anyway, hope it’s enjoyable so far! Especially after half my editing was lost when I uploaded the story.

:grumbles: