|Where'd They Go?
Author: Elphie Marky PM
One-shot. Ever wonder where Phil and Captain Widdershins went when they abandoned the Queequeg? R&R!Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor - Words: 543 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 2 - Published: 04-23-05 - Status: Complete - id: 2363424
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
This is a short humor fic about where Phil and Widdershins went when they abandoned the Queequeg.
"Aye!" Captain Widdershins cried. "Grab my luggage, Cookie."
"Yessir," Phil grabbed the suitcase that belonged to his captain as well as his own.
"Aye! I want coffee," Widdershins said. "No, tea! Aye, coffee. Cookie, get me coffee."
"Yes, just a moment," Phil set the bags down again.
"Right now, aye" the captain said loudly. "He who hesitates is lost. Or she."
"Right away, Captain," Phil rushed to the closest Starbucks. It was crazy how many Starbuckses were in airports. Phil returned with two tall coffees, one for Widdershins and one for himself. Phil spilled a bit on his pants. "It's a good thing that this coffee only stained my pants instead of burning my skin. That's quite fortunate."
"Flight 713 to Bermuda is now boarding," a booming voice came from the loudspeakers.
"Aye, that's us," Widdershins cried out, downing his remaining coffee. "Let's board! He or she who hesitates is lost. We're hesitating now, we must stop or we'll get lost. Come now, Cookie."
"Coming!" Phil picked up the bags and followed Captain Widdershins to the terminal. They were allowed to enter the air plane. Captain Widdershins took the window seat with Phil beside him.
"Hello and welcome to Flight 713 departing to Bermuda," the pilot's voice bellowed over the speaker system. "We will be departing shortly so please buckle up and keep your trays in an upright position. Thank you."
The place began moving and was up in the air in no time. Captain Widdershins began screaming as the plane took off. "Hold me, Cookie, I'm scared." Phil placed his hand on the Captain's shoulder. The whimpering stopped as soon as the place landed. It was not an enjoyable flight for those aboard.
As soon as the luggage was gathered into a cart and the two had a hotel room, they tried to think of something to do.
"Let's go swimming, aye!" Widdershins cried. "No, let's shop, aye. No, let's swim. He or she who hesitates is lost."
"All right, let's get our swim trunks on!" Phil pulled a purple mass out of his bag and headed towards the bathroom. He emerged minutes later in purple swim trunks that came to his mid-thighs. Captain Widdershins had worn his bathing suit under his clothes. Phil noticed him wearing a blue speedo. He also had bright orange water wings and a yellow float around his waist.
"Let's go, aye," he cried. "He who hesitates is lost. Or she." He led Phil out the door and barreled down the hallway, attracting strange stares from small children and their parents. "Greetings, aye," the Captain boomed, saluting at the on-lookers.
They rented two yellow beach chairs and a bright pink umbrella. They set up a spot and sat down. After enjoying a quick swim in the warm Bermuda waters, they sat in the sun to dry off.
"Aye, this vacation is so relaxing," Widdershins leaned back and relaxed.
"Hey, yeah, I mean, it's great and all," Phil began, "but what about the kids?"
"Aye, the kids – oh crap."
The End. Review!