Hold me

Challenge in a can: Dawn, lonely, painkillers

The feeling was bad, worse than ever before. It should have been her, not Buffy, who jumped. She’d planned the sacrifice, you know. When Buffy had untied her and the portal had opened, she knew that she was going to jump. She wanted to jump, to end the pain and to save the world.

All summer, she’d been around Willow, Xander, Tara, Anya and Spike. They were Buffy’s friends, not hers. Despite how nice they acted, they would never forgive her. It was her fault that Buffy jumped. If she had gone in time, everything would be different.

But the fact that really pained her was that if she had tried to fight back, or to help in someway, then maybe Buffy wouldn’t be dead, and she wouldn’t be in all this pain. Life had been so hard, and she felt like ending it every single day. When she looked at Willow, all she felt was fury and anger. Willow blamed Dawn, they all did. What upset Dawn a lot was Spike. She’d always liked Spike, he was hot and he was so nice to her. Now that Buffy was gone, he would never look her in the eye, and he always looked so distant.

Dawn was lonely, she’d been alone all summer. Well, people had been around her, but she was lonely inside. Empty, as if nothing was there. That was why she couldn’t go on like this. She had to end it, to stop the pain, and the misery. Then everybody else could live happier not having to watch after her.

She picked up the container. Dawn was surprised that something so small could end all that pain. She unscrewed the lid and poured out the contents. Roughly 30 painkillers, that should be enough. It wasn’t like she’d done anything like this before.

She delicately chose 6 pills and was about to put them in her mouth, when she noticed someone in the hallway.

“What are you doing?” Spike asked angrily.

“Can’t you tell?” Dawn replied.

“What will it take to stop you trying to take your own life?” Spike asked. “This is the 2nd time I’ve caught you.”

“I can’t take it,” Dawn sobbed, tears falling down her cheeks.

“Can I do anything to help?”

“Hold me.”

Spike was shocked by the simplicity of the command, hold her. But something inside, deep and far away, made him feel like he had to do this. He approached the sofa, and sat down next to Dawn. She lay back slowly and rested on him, Spike held her close. This simple thing made Dawn feel better, wanted, and for one moment, she was glad that her sister was dead.

A/N: I know I have other projects but I needed to write a Spawn fic, I had to. A bit angsty, but that’s what I like. Please review!