Chapter Three: The Possibilities of Impossibilities

"You and Clark are really getting along, aren't you?"

His eyes barely tear themselves away from the computer screen in front of him, but he watches her from the corner of his eye. "I don't think anyone has ever loved me more at the moment," he replies dryly.

Abby Fine's whereabouts are still unknown, but Chloe has a pretty good idea that she's made a quick trip to Belle Reeve to make sure her mother didn't leave any lasting damage that wasn't skin deep and couldn't be repaired. Brett and Lana have been back at school for a good week now, and Lois is on a journalism kick after getting fan mail that says she gave some girl 'a life changing experience'.

It is nothing out of the ordinary, especially by Smallville's standards, but it's not lost on Lex that Lois's sudden interest in both journalism and Clark Kent bothers Chloe more than she lets show. Her irritation with the situation bothers him a great deal as well, more than he cares to admit, but he doesn't let that show either.

For a brief moment he wonders if she realizes that most of what they try to hide from each other really doesn't ever remain hidden and probably never will.

A jacket slides off her shoulders and is strewn across the back of a overly plush, expensive leather chair. Lex watches her with a small, almost nonexistent smile, the ease in which she does so showing an amount of comfortableness, an amount of disregard for the personal space of his private office no one had ever dared to show before. He'd be lying if he said he didn't like it. He'd be a fool if he let himself believe the way she fit so easily into his perfectly polished walls didn't turn him on, intrigue him in the slightest.

"You feel like yelling?"

Chloe looks young today, fresh, with sun kissed shoulders and face. She's smiling that beautiful smile and he strongly resists the urge to return it. Actually has to will himself not to.

"Sometimes."

"Do you want to yell at me?"

"No," Lex isn't sure where she's going with this, but the uncertainty doesn't show. Knowing Chloe means living with unexpected turns and twist, and Lex finds he's never loved expecting the unexpected more.

"Do you want to talk?"

"No."

There is no maliciousness in his tone, no edge, just a formal answer in the negative. She isn't suppose to be there, they both know that much. Space, that is what the had decided on, that's where this agreement stemmed. Avoiding contact with one another meant less questions, less time spent having to figure out ways to hide this, whatever it was, from nosy onlookers. Chloe is reluctant to put a specific name to what is going on between them and Lex figures he really doesn't care.

As long as he has her, he thinks, it doesn't matter what this is.

"You've been sulking," a hint of teasing, a hint of seriousness and there is wonder at how she can know him so well after such a short amount of time.

"I have not."

It's a blatant lie, and he can't bring himself to meet her eyes as he says it so they stay on the computer screen in front of him. Lying had always come easy to him, not an honorable trait by any means, but still, he couldn't look her in the eye when he told her simplest lie.

"When was the last time you left your office?" Chloe follows the question with a raised eyebrow, and when he fails to answer she continues, "just as I suspected, sulking."

"I do not sulk," there is a bit of edge in his tone now, but the smile is hidden somewhere underneath and she can see it as clear as day. "I've had work to do."

The expected roll of the eyes is accompanied by a click of her tongue. "Of course you have."

"I have."

"I just said I believed you."

"Sounded more like you were mocking me."

Chloe shrugs noncommittally, examining her fingernails in an almost scrutinizing way. He watches, amazed by every move she makes, enthralled simply by her because she was so close, in arms reach. Lex is preparing to stand, to make his way over to her, before he thinks twice. But sits himself back down as soon as he reanalyzes the situation. His mind always wins over the matters of his heart. Even when it involves Chloe, and even though these days the battle is harder to win than it used to be.

Lex never makes moves that aren't calculated and well-thought out. He never gives answers to questions he didn't see coming, and he didn't let information slip unless he had thought it out, and then re-thought it out numerous times again. With Chloe that well worn, perfectly working process flies right out the window, sometimes accompanied with his inhibitions.

Sometimes he likes it, the feeling he has with her, the foreign feeling of trust and-dare he say- completion that flows through him when he's with her. Like nothing else matters but the two of them, in that moment. Sometimes he likes it, yes, but most times he curses it, curses her for causing his stiff, stoic exterior, that he has worked so hard to develop to disintegrate just by her mere presence.

"Are you ever going to tell me why you and Clark are fighting?"

Lex knows it took a lot for her to just get the question past her lips, and somewhere in his muddled, lust induced mind, he knows that was the reason she was here. Well, not the whole reason, but a big part of the reason. Lex has grown accustomed to fact that Chloe, for reasons still unknown to him, likes just simply being with him. He has grown accustomed to it mostly because he feels the same way about her. He may never admit it out loud, only think it, but the feeling is still there, and he welcomes it freely.

"I'm not sure you really want to know."

Lies are always easier than the truth and it surprises him that this has a little bit of truth in it too. Truth was he wasn't sure he wanted her to know, wanted to see her face when he told her. There's only one way he could come out of this and it was with his true colors shining. The ones he tries to hide when he's with her because he doesn't want to scare her away. Because he doesn't think she can handle seeing them. She's strong, sure, but no one has ever been that strong. Not for him.

"That is a lie and you know it."

Chloe isn't angry, just seems resigned. As if she expected this, like she knew that would be his answer, but came here anyway. Is asking anyway. Again, there is the wonder at being known so well that creeps into his mind unknowingly.

"Are you ever going to tell me?"

"Eventually, yes."

It occurs to him that those may have been the most truthful words he's uttered though-out their entire conversation.

She's not supposed to be there but neither on of them is jumping to point that out.

xXx

It starts with a pristine white business card, with black penmanship she recognized easily sitting on her desk at The Torch a few days before. The note simply said: Tuesday, 4:30. It was obvious who it was from, and Lois didn't bat an eye when as she watches her stuff the card into her back pocket. The fact that the card switched from the left to right pocket of her jeans during the time she'd been out the day after, did go unnoted however, because as long as Lois didn't ask, there was no reason to bring it up.

The penmanship she recognizes simply because she's seen it too many times before. The notes on files she gave him on Adam Knight that he'd passed back to her, scribbles on pieces of paper he'd left her that explained abrupt departures as she slept.

Any person in their right mind probably would have questioned it. But this was Chloe, and she trusts Lex, and and sure enough Tuesday afternoon she finds herself sneaking out of Lois's sight long enough to get away unscathed and interrogation free.

Silly romantic notions fills her mind, and in spite of the fact that every single one of them were ridiculous and a downright impossibility, she lets herself believe on the ride over to the mansion that this stupid charade they're partaking in would disappear for a few hours. That the façade would fade away, and she could feel a mere resemblance of the way she had the summer prior.

Chloe constantly wonders how long their agreement to keep each other at arms length will actually last because the urge to jump him the moment she sees him has become more powerful by each passing moment, and the subtle touches she sends his way aren't as subtle as she'd like them to be and last longer than they should.

Her car is parked out of view and she enters the service entrance out of habit. Anyone who cared enough to look would know she was there, but it made the both of them feel better if their tracks were covered. The cover of interviews of The Torch only went so far, and sooner or later someone was going to catch on that for all the time she spends in Lex's presence, there are no interviews to show for it.

An elderly lady Chloe has never seen before leads her past the library, past Lex's office, and towards a part of the house she couldn't remember being before.

"Where is Mr. Luthor?"

Formalities are always the best in situations like these, because even though the greatest attempts were put forth on her part, she was becoming just as paranoid as Lex. It was a safe bet that his entire staff knew what went on between them, but Lex had always told her to let them know as little as possible. Everyone had a price, he had told her, and it was scary to find out what the going rate was these days for digging up dirt on a Luthor no matter who the information hurt.

"Waiting for you," the graying brunette says softly, stopping all together and nodding her head to a closed door before walking away.

She's a reporter first and foremost and curiosity is what makes her push the door open, sheer adrenaline and anticipation is what makes her walk inside. It's relatively dark, but the light from the hallway streams in behind her as she makes her way down the few stairs, but as soon as her eyes adjust she stops. Dead in her tracks. Of all the things she had expected, of all the silly romantic notions that had crossed her mind on the drive over, had filtered into her thoughts for the past days, this was not one of them.

"I didn't know whether or not you would come."

The voice comes from behind her, and for the life of her she can't make herself turn around, can't tear eyes away from her surroundings. Through the shock she recognizes it as Lex's voice, slightly wavering and uncertain. Scared almost, and as her heart beats a million miles a minute she realizes that it wasn't possible because Lex Luthor was fearless.

Finally she manages to turn wide-eyes towards him, and the look on his face tells her that her earlier assumptions were faulty. He looks just as fearful as she does.

"What is this?" There words said in one breath, and Chloe doesn't know what to be more amazed about- her surroundings, Clark's beautiful, boyishly handsome face staring back at her or the fact that Lex's face was so open, so full of emotion. A rare act he never took part in.

A small sad smirk as he steps into the room, he cocks his head to the side and flips another switch, the room finally fully illuminated.

Lex regards her carefully before answering, "The splitting of a friendship."

xXx

He's testing her.

Lex watches Chloe's eyes scan the room and flutter back to his occasionally. He doesn't like what he sees there mostly because he can't put a name to it. Doesn't recognize the look in her eyes as her fingers trace over the hood of the beaten Porsche.

He's testing Chloe, trying to see what would happen when she found out a fraction of who he really was, trying to see what she'd do, how far she would run in the opposite direction. There is reason in thinking that she couldn't handle this particular truth. That Chloe wouldn't want to have uncovered this secret once she found it.

The truth was the hardest thing to handle, cuts you deeper than anything else because there isn't any part of it that could leave you with another possible answer. The truth was fact, you couldn't change it. This was it, crystal clear right in front of her, and he found himself holding his breath as he awaited her reaction.

A part of him foolishly hopes that this will end well. It had with Helen after all, but shortly after the thought enters his mind he realizes that Helen and Chloe were two different people. Helen had accepted this part of him, this darker side that everyone knew about but had no proof of, but the fact that it could have been for purely ulterior motives didn't go unnoted by him.

Chloe's eyes stray to the computer screen where the reenactment of the accident on the bridge replayed over and over, and then turned back to the car. Back and forth, back and forth, a peculiarlook on her face, before her eyes finally land on him.

"Clark said you stopped investigating him," she presses her lips into a thin line, steps closer to the jar holding the parasite from the caves.

Lex steps closer to her, watches her carefully, reaches out a hand to touch her, but stops himself. "I lied," a simple truth that holds more meaning than ever and he watches her swallow harshly at the sound of it.

"I-" she laughs mirthlessly, tearing her eyes away and finally settles on his, "I don't know what to say."

"You wanted the truth, Chloe. This is it. This is who I am."

Nobody had ever stood by him through thick and thin, never cared enough to fight for him. Under any other circumstances he wouldn't have cared, the disappointment he'd suffered during his youth because of his father had made him develop a rougher covering than others. Disappointment was a feeling he hardly ever felt because he never held enough faith in people to let himself get to the point where disappointment was an option.

The kind he'd felt with Clark had been mild, he'd been prepared for it. But now it was different. Everything was different with Chloe. In the few short months he has really known her, his faith in her had increased immensely and the heaviness in his heart could only be attached to the disappointment and hurt he was bound to feel at the end of this.

The situation warrants the move and he slides a hand over his bald head, rocks back and forth on his heels awaiting her reaction. Waiting for her to say something, anything.

"Why are you showing me this?"

"I wanted to be honest with you," his voice sounds honest, and tender almost, but there is a pang in his heart when she moves away when he reaches to touch her arm. "I didn't want our relationship to be based on lies."

She nods sharply, turns on her heel to click off the screen with Clark's face on it. "Okay," her sigh echoes throughout the room as she faces him. His eyes never leave her face, never stop watching her, and when he expects her to look away, she doesn't. "So we're being truthful? Right now? No lies, just you, me, the truth and nothing else?"

The raised eyebrow that marks the Sullivan challenge confuses him, "Yes."

He watches as she turns on her heel and makes her way straight for the meteor rock. "Then you will understand when I ask you my next question?" It sounds more of a statement than a question, but as her eyes stray towards the meteor rock, he answers anyway.

"Of course."

She smiles that half smile that reminds him eerily of his own, "What exactly did you find out about Clark Kent?"

xXx

Lex fantasizes about Chloe.

He thinks, that possibly she is the only woman he has kept fantasizing about even after he's slept with her. He thinks, that possibly, his fantasizes are better than the reality of the two of them, that reality will almost, if not always, run a close second. For in his fantasies the touches of skin under his fingertips, the constant brush of her lips seems too real to question, and when Chloe kisses him and it is filled with a promise of forever. A promise that is unwavering and able to be kept.

In reality, that promise is a lie.

Now the space between them is literally not much, but figuratively the two of them couldn't be farther a part. His fantasies take over where reality ends these days because it is on a very rare occasion that the two of them break the terms of their agreement and allow themselves to indulge in the sweet surrender of a simple kiss.

Too often than not Chloe's kisses are bittersweet. Are filled with adoration and dare he say love, and in that moment, the very moment her lips brush against his, it's everything to him, and than in the next it's nothing. Nothing but hidden kisses, and gentle caresses, declarations he aches to say but knows he never will. All to soon the moments they share are over, and he's forced to act as though it's nothing to him. He's forced to watch from a far as she acts as though he's nothing to her.

On the rare occasions that his sleep is filled with dreams, they are always filled with her.

She stops by, late at night. She is not expected home at any time because Gabe knows about them, is happy for them. Clark knows too, and in this world, in this perfect world he dreams, Clark is happy for them too. He even envies Lex because he finally has what Clark has always wanted: someone to love him for him, unconditionally, no strings attached.

Chloe will curl into his lap, and Lex will let her because in this world he is comfortable letting his guard down. She will lean her head against his shoulder and he will watch as her eyes fall closed contently. His own eyes will close as her lips touch his cheek lovingly. Lex won't question it, and it felt like the most natural thing to do. He will watch in amazement as his fingers fit perfectly between hers and wonder how he got to be so lucky.

Lex will end up on his knees between her legs, bringing her closer and closer to the edge as her fingers grip his shoulders. She urges him on with her harsh gasps and pants, her shouted declarations. His need to watch her is still there, even in his dreams, and he does, eyes constantly on her face, meeting hers right when she comes. She will throw her head back and grin, murmur his name huskily and he will every second of it.

Afterwards, she will pull him up for a lazy kiss. Lips sliding together with ease, tongues finding each other easily, and the whole thing will taste of a familiarity he never wants to rid himself of.

"I love you," Chloe will whisper against his lips, smiling that beautiful smile she smiles just for him.

In this perfect world he dreams, he will say it back, over and over again, and means it every time.

It had never occurred to him before, that brief blinding possibility, that the perfect word he dreamed would be obtainable in real life. He had shrugged it off, pushed it away so he could live with it just like every other thing he'd pushed into the realm of impossibilities. Right next to the possibility of his father ever loving him like only a father could love his son.

But he realizes that maybe it isn't so impossible, that the two of them are more alike than he had thought. And he thinks maybe, just maybe, he loves their similarities just as much as he's going to love the moment that the promises her kisses held in his fantasies would hold true to the ones in reality.

TBC