I just captured this wild bird…Yep…hmmm, it was hoppin' about with an injured wing and what not. I'm takin' it to a wild life shelter tomorrow. Did I mention some lady actually caught it? Yeaaa….she russled it up in the yard. I provided the shoe box. And since I know where them shelters be and what not…I'm stuck with the rascal. He's soft. I call him Senior Injury…

OH GOD! THEM WEE HANDCUFFS! JEZUS CHRIST! Oh…yea…the story…Here it goes!

"Cheet cheet!" The fuzzy lil chipmunk ran it's paws up the squirrels flank to fondle it's hanging…fur balls! Hashanah! Holy shit! I can't stop thinking' about them teeny little creatures doin' it! What's worse, is that they aren't even the same species! I mean, are you with me? Huh? CROSS-SPECIES SEXUAL RELATIONS!

"That was hot, Orochi-sama!" Kibimaru still imagined the thrusts and groans of them little critters.

"Oh yes indeed! Would you like a ride home little fella?" Putting on his most disarming smile, Orochimaru held his hand out to the dying Kibimaru.

Kibimaru screwed up his face in extreme concentration. He then gave Orochi a long hard, stare. Orochi wore a thin white t-shirt that read "Boys and Girls Club"; bright blue short shorts; a filthy baseball cap on his head; and them hideous Dock martin sandal things with socks that everyone had to have! Do you remember those? Them horrible brown sandals? I remember them! Everyone had them and I was uncool cause I didn't have a pair! But come on! Come on! They were disgusting! Seriously! The real losers were the ones who fought each other at Payless for a pair of ugly $35 dollar sandals!

Or how about Eiffel 65's song Blue? Do you remember when everyone was humming or singing "I'm blue dabba dee dabba die"? Cause I do! Once again, I was the loser who had never heard of them or their song! It was so amazingly popular! I had to hear them! But I was sheltered! So one day I snuck over to Fred Meyers and listened to them on those head sets…THEY WERE TERRIBLE! WHAT THE HELL! I WA STHE WEIRDO CAUSE I DIDN'T LISTEN TO THEM! I BEG TO DIFFER! Jeez….