FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination|
Author of 12 Stories |
This is a stream of consciousness (proof that I DID learn something in English last year) that came into my head while listening to Helena (My Chemical Romance ROCK!)and Broken! I was pretty bored, so this might not be too good.
Disclaimer: As always, I own nothing, not even Kai.
Why is my life so messed up?
(The reader looked down at the crumpled paper that s/he held and carried on reading the spidery writing.)
I’m just sitting here, hoping no-one will notice me. No-one know what it’s like, so don’t try to lie. My life, from beginning to right now, has been hell.
They think that they do understand then? Okay, just try and make eye contact with me. You can’t, can you? I can outstare anyone easily. My red orbs give nothing away, and I know people are wondering if I’m even human.
Still trying to understand? Becoming confused? Well…
Just try to imagine this.
Cold. Dark. Pain. Beatings, always beatings, never ending. The feeling that you’re losing yourself to them, that you no longer own even yourself.
That’s what my life was like.
(The reader stared in horror at the words, but felt compelled to read on. Glancing over his/her shoulder to check for anyone coming back, s/he continued to read.)
Don’t even bother trying to pity me. I’ve done some pretty awful things in my time as well. I’m just so sick of the memories. Stinging like a blade. They say that memories make you who you are, but sometimes I think I preferred the forgetting. It would be better than these nightmares.
Sometimes I just want to tell someone, anyone, everything. But how can I? I’m the one who’s got to look out for everyone. I can’t cry, much as I’d like to.
I can’t explain what he does to me.
(A faint suspicion running through his/her head, the reader’s hand shook as s/he read on.)
Why am I even writing this? No-one’s going to read it. No-one would want to.
I’m tired of the beatings, the abuse. More than anything, I just want…companionship. But if I don’t let anyone reach me, how do I expect to find a friend? How do I expect to let my team know that I do think of them as such? I can’t even pretend to myself anymore that I don’t care.
I feel so lost.
(The reader turned the paper over, willing there to be something more written on the other side, something that would tell him/her that the strong façade was even slightly real. There was nothing. With tears leaking out the corners of his/her eyes, s/he silently left the room, lest someone would discover him/her there.
S/he slipped the paper into his/her pocket.
Later, a slate-haired teenager walked into the room. Silently, he watched the sunset. A shadow and a rustle in the doorway made him turn. The reader stood there, with a determined expression on his/her face and the paper in his/her hand. They stared at each other for a moment. Then, slowly, the teen’s face crumbled, and he fell sobbing into the reader’s arms.
The reader held him gently and looked at the sky. S/he understood. Finally. There was no longer any reason for him to hide. And there could still be hope. Like the everlasting cycle of life and death, the sun’s setting and rising, there was always hope.
A phoenix will always rise from the ashes.)
Well, there you go. Please review.
Closing quote: ‘There is always hope.’ (Aragorn in TTT)
:
:
:
:
